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 Post subject: Wow! My Journey
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 1:48 pm 
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This is my first time writing on this forum. I hope I can help somebody like many of the people here have helped me. For me, its part of my recovery to help others if I can. I, by no means, have all the answers, I will write from my experience and I will be honest to you with what I am going through. I am tapering down right now and so far so good down below .5mg, I have found for me, at this point, that I can do around .5mg one day(split up in 2 .25mg strips) and the next day .25mg(split up in to 2 .125mg strips) one in the am and one in the late afternoon. A quick story. I got hooked on pain meds going through a terrible time with a knee injury. Instead of getting surgery, I masked the pain with norco 10/325 downed it with red bull, several times a day for 3.5 years. started at 6 a day, went as high as 20 in a day. I was taking mainly norco and percocet 10/325. By the way I had the surgery for my knee 2 years in to my addiction and continued using the pain meds anyway(isnt that a surprise!!). For me there reached a time that I just did not want to do it anymore and I was just wanting to be done. I did a lot of research on suboxone, which in the course of doing the research I found this great forum! Anyway before I stopped the pain meds I found through all of your experiences as well as others on other sites the information I needed. I know there is not one right answer for everyone, but let me tell you, I was in the dark about all of this. I went to my pain DR. and told her I wanted to stop!! It felt empowering to me that I made that decision, I was doing this for me. After staying off for about 30 hours i went to her office, she wanted to induce me at 16mg, I said no, I will do 4mg and see how i feel in a hour. I actually got through with only being induced by the 4mgs I did take a tiny strip 6 hrs later, probably about another 1 mg. The point is you can feel ok with less, I had to be mentally strong and wanting this change in my life. Do not let anybody fool you how powerful our minds are if you truly put your sole in to something. I have done a lot of research and have found out that depending how many of those receptor sites your brain has made(pathways) will determine how much sub u need to fill those sites and not go in to complete withdrawal. Yet most drs over induce most of the time because they are ignorant to the process. Not all, but most cases that I hear about. I was induced on May 21, 2012. I used the tools I have found here on subox forum and a guy named Robert on another to help me. After taking 4 mgs a day for 2 weeks, I went down to 3 mg for 2 weeks, then 2 mg for 2 weeks, 1.5 mg for 2 weeks, 1 mg for 2 weeks, .75 mg for 2 weeks, .5 mg for 2 weeks, and now i am at the end of my 2nd week of .5mg one day and .25 mg the next. I have had very little withdrawal symptoms. And the most important thing I discovered is that I feel so empowered doing this for myself!! Its huge!! My liver was on toxic overload, I was slowly killing myself. What a blessing that I made this choice! I am going to counseling twice a week to help me with everything to deal with addiction and my own personal demons and triggers. I know i have probably left out a lot of info. but I will respond to any questions, my journey is going to be a life long one, hell I am not even totally off sub yet, I just felt I needed to make an introduction and give back a little to everybody who helped me so far. I have always felt comfort knowing there are others who understand and are going through the same thing. I will keep posting, take care everybody, there is hope, and even more if you truly seek recovery, you can have your life back!! My plan is to be completely off in the next 6-8 weeks, making it a total of 20-24 week process for me, One thing I have learned so far, is not to be hard on yourself though this.


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 Post subject: Re: Wow! My Journey
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 2:13 pm 
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[quote="Justdoit4u"]This is my first time writing on this forum. I hope I can help somebody like many of the people here have helped me. For me, its part of my recovery to help others if I can. I, by no means, have all the answers, I will write from my experience and I will be honest to you with what I am going through. I am tapering down right now and so far so good down below .5mg, I have found for me, at this point, that I can do around .5mg one day(split up in 2 .25mg strips) and the next day .25mg(split up in to 2 .125mg strips) one in the am and one in the late afternoon. A quick story. I got hooked on pain meds going through a terrible time with a knee injury. Instead of getting surgery, I masked the pain with norco 10/325 downed it with red bull, several times a day for 3.5 years. started at 6 a day, went as high as 20 in a day. I was taking mainly norco and percocet 10/325. By the way I had the surgery for my knee 2 years in to my addiction and continued using the pain meds anyway(isnt that a surprise!!). For me there reached a time that I just did not want to do it anymore and I was just wanting to be done. I did a lot of research on suboxone, which in the course of doing the research I found this great forum! Anyway before I stopped the pain meds I found through all of your experiences as well as others on other sites the information I needed. I know there is not one right answer for everyone, but let me tell you, I was in the dark about all of this. I went to my pain DR. and told her I wanted to stop!! It felt empowering to me that I made that decision, I was doing this for me. After staying off for about 30 hours i went to her office, she wanted to induce me at 16mg, I said no, I will do 4mg and see how i feel in a hour. I actually got through with only being induced by the 4mgs I did take a tiny strip 6 hrs later, probably about another 1 mg. The point is you can feel ok with less, I had to be mentally strong and wanting this change in my life. Do not let anybody fool you how powerful our minds are if you truly put your sole in to something. I have done a lot of research and have found out that depending how many of those receptor sites your brain has made(pathways) will determine how much sub u need to fill those sites and not go in to complete withdrawal. Yet most drs over induce most of the time because they are ignorant to the process. Not all, but most cases that I hear about. I was induced on May 21, 2012. I used the tools I have found here on subox forum and a guy named Robert on another to help me. After taking 4 mgs a day for 2 weeks, I went down to 3 mg for 2 weeks, then 2 mg for 2 weeks, 1.5 mg for 2 weeks, 1 mg for 2 weeks, .75 mg for 2 weeks, .5 mg for 2 weeks, and now i am at the end of my 2nd week of .5mg one day and .25 mg the next. I have had very little withdrawal symptoms. And the most important thing I discovered is that I feel so empowered doing this for myself!! Its huge!! My liver was on toxic overload, I was slowly killing myself. What a blessing that I made this choice! I am going to counseling twice a week to help me with everything to deal with addiction and my own personal demons and triggers. I know i have probably left out a lot of info. but I will respond to any questions, my journey is going to be a life long one, hell I am not even totally off sub yet, I just felt I needed to make an introduction and give back a little to everybody who helped me so far. I have always felt comfort knowing there are others who understand and are going through the same thing. I will keep posting, take care everybody, there is hope, and even more if you truly seek recovery, you can have your life back!! My plan is to be completely off in the next 6-8 weeks, making it a total of 20-24 week process for me, One thing I have learned so far, is not to be hard on yourself though this. I would like any responses or questions. ciao


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 4:50 pm 
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[font=Comic Sans MS]Hello there and welcome to the forum!!! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us! It's nice to hear that you are doing so well. It truly sounds like you are in the right space mentally for this journey. Your story sounds awfully similar to a lot of ours....wonder why that is??? LOL!

With the right attitude and determination, you CAN and WILL beat this thing! And it sounds like you have both. I wish you the best of luck, and hope that the rest of your taper is as smooth as the beginning has been. Let us know if there is anything at all that you need our help with. This is a great community with lots of openminded, and supportive members. Not to mention our moderators kick ass!! They truly listen and try to help. Plus there are a ton that have tapered and jumped with success. You probably already know that since you've been reading this forum for some time now.

You sound like you have quite a bit of experience with the taper, and have a lot to offer other members as well. Thank you again for offering your story to us like you did. That takes courage. Hope you have a terrific night, and best of luck. Again, WELCOME!!!!![/font]

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 1:10 pm 
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Thanks, GoingStrong, I like your user name. Going strong to me feels very empowering, and believe me, it took great inner strength to seek recovery for myself. I cant believe how strong the mental part of this addiction takes hold of you, if you let it. Anyway, I hope to post when I can, it is truly part of my recovery to learn from all of you and help when I can. Ciao!


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 1:59 pm 
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Hello anybody out there, My taper plan has been working for me. I am on the last 3 days of adjusting my dose again. I have noticed a little more anxiety lately. You probably know what i am talking about, i sit at the computer and I feel very anxious. This is when I go and try to do something physical, exercise on my total gym. I can get through those moments doing this most of the time. Other times I have given in and will take another .125mg sliver. My first choice is always to do the exercise first, resort to more sub. second. This is part of the strong mind game addiction takes for me. In the past, I would always go for more meds, I did not care. The mental part of this journey, to me, is as much strong, and in some cases way stronger than the physical part. I am doing this for me! By doing this for me, I can be present to all that are in my life. I needed to share a little, I hope the best for everybody, ciao.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 2:13 pm 
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Hey! It sounds like you are doing everything you need to do for a successful taper off Suboxone. That and your positive attitude will take you far.

Welcome to the forum and best of luck!

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You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

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 Post subject: Thanks !
PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 2:34 pm 
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Diary of a quitter, Thank you, the moderators on this forum have given me a lot of useful information. I have spent around, 9 months?, on the sideline before joining up yesterday. I am grateful for this site and for the people who share their experience, strength, and hope. Ciao


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 4:11 pm 
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hey everybody.. justdoit .... my story and abuse amounts almost exactly on par ! I went to hospital monday morning after 30 hrs and WD... amazing results after 24 hours but went to this site yesterday and am kinda freaked out by amount they started me out with ! so because I'm still an idiot I didnt take whole 8 but cut in half .. i feel fine today taking just 1/2 after 12 hours ...
maybe a little bit but not much for half directed. what do you think about fighting thru on this amount if I can ? I think they start out pretty high. I'll talk to Dr after one whole day .. maybe in for a hard time ... exit off Subs kinda freaking me out.
Nice not being alone .... thanks


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 Post subject: Hang in there Macboy
PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 11:07 pm 
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Macboy, You will be ok. I was soooooo ready to be done with the pills. Keep it real simple with the induction process. I see that you said you took 4mg?. to start? What I did, is after I felt ok, about an hour later, I left the docs office and just got busy. I took small walks, watched some movies, exercised in small amounts. Anything to get out of my head!! For me the mental mind games were the worst thing. I was so used to popping a pill to be ok or to not deal with anything. Anyway, try to do things that you like and when it gets tuff for you, do not be hard on yourself, have some small slivers around. You can cut the film up easily to small amounts. If you are on the 8mg film, cut it into 16 pieces so you have some .5mg pieces around to figure out YOUR stable point. For me, I let myself feel ok, the best way to describe it, is a neutral feeling, not low but not high. It was ok, i could function. Really listen to your body, you will be fine, I remember feeling a little dizzy, some sweats, some runny nose and eyes, nothing terrible. i will try to help you any way I can. Thank you for replying to me, hope to hear from you.


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 Post subject: update ?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 8:57 pm 
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How are you doing on your program to stop ?


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 Post subject: update Justdoit
PostPosted: Sun Sep 09, 2012 11:09 am 
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Justdoit .... im on day 5 having gone to hospital last Tues morning for induction.
Make it short .... Wed did 4-6mgs thurs did 2.5mgs friday 1/16 .5mgs sat (yesterday) took 1/32 or .25 mgs
TOTAL ALL DAY. Im writing you sunday morning before I head to church.
I am fine ... absolutely no WDs .... NONE !
each time during last 4 days I would not take anything .... unless I scored 15 on COWS chart PAWS checks were high. I was hurting bad each time. kinda like i Reinduce myself with each dose.
within minutes less and less was required to stabilize me.
Drs TOTALLY FUKN people with this long term dependency.
I HAVE NEVER FELT BETTER NOR MORE PRODUCTIVE . go to gym for hour every day.
I'm sorry you were on it for so long ..... My biggest problem is my next planned dose is 1/64 secheduled for 1:00 this aft but no way i'm gonna score 15. (and hard to cut 8 that small. I dont know when or if DTs will begin but until then .... i'm not touching that shit
Let me know how you are doing

prayers are in for ya


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 Post subject: Update
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:35 am 
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Hi Macboy, im sorry I did not respond right away. I get so involved with everyday life I totally forget to take time for myself. I am breaking that pattern though. Yeah, in terms of being on the sub, I have been on since May 21st(about 3.5 months). I have never been sure what length of time is the right amount. For me, I just want to be successful !! That is the best way to describe where I am and what I am doing. I am going to taper until I am off sub successfully for me. I know everybody is different and thats why this forum is so great to share our experience and help others. I am glad to see that you are doing well. Great job! I am going on vacation after today, I will try to check in with this thread. Personally, I am trying to get stable at .25mg this week, I am trying to do .125mg in the am and then .125mg in the late afternoon. Today is day one. I have some .125mg slivers if I need one but I will try to do my exercise or anything healthy for me first before I take more. Just keeping myself occupied helps me out. What a mind game! Anyway, glad you are doing well and i hope we keep in touch.


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 Post subject: Stay strong
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:02 pm 
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proud of ya brother. I just took 1/64 or .125mg and am cooking. feel like i took speed. feel great.
Your advice was outstanding ..... just hold off without schedule and listen to body. when you cant really take it take half of what ya think. I took 48 hours off since last 1/32. I am no longer afraid of these things !!!
Keep in touch .... you have impacted my life tremendously ! GOD BLESS YA!
have a great vac.
later

Macboy


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 Post subject: Update
PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2012 12:43 pm 
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Hey justdoit ..... I finally met my Dr !!! ! told him that I'm not interested in substituting one addiction for another more powerful one. He agreed !! I told him I'm at .25 or less a day to stabilize. He kinda freaked out because he prescribed 16mg a day. He said he has never had anyone do what I did ..... EVER !!!
He wrote me prescription for Gabapentin 300 mg 60 3 a day.
He said to jump when a can. .25 is as low as you're gonna get almost. He said jumping is still gonna hurt which is why he wrote anti seisure medicine !!!
It's Sunday and I told my wife That Dr told me I need a week of feeling pretty bad. he wants me off for 7 days then I asked to have a NELTREXONE shot. its lasts 6 weeks and is true opiate /alcohol blocker.
Thats my update.
Hope you are well ....let me know

MACBOY


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 Post subject: I am back
PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 4:49 pm 
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Hi Macboy, Got back from vacation. I ended up mainly moving my mom, but thats ok, I love helping her out! I did get a little time for myself, just relaxed and enjoyed not having to be responsible for anybody but myself for a few days. Anyway I am back home and I am trying to get stable at .5mg. I was going lower but started having a lot of anxiety, so to not be hard on myself I decided to go back to .25mg in the am and .25mg around 400pm. I am very happy to see that your Doctor was surprised about how little you were on. I wonder if I need the blood pressure medication? I have heard about people using that when they are stopping the sub. Keep me posted on your progress, let me know how the B.P. medicine makes you feel. Take care.


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 Post subject: Good for you !
PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 7:28 pm 
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Hey JDI ! Glad you had a good vacation. Moms are great ... good on ya !
What I've learned during my short time with this process and talking to others in my various groups and forums is to be patient and forgiving of ourselves and the journey toward "normal". I'm took three days off of .125 and had a bad day 4 so .... i took another .06. That sounds like nothing and it really is like around 2 mg of hydro, but trust me this suboxone is powerful and I was better in an hour.
Im on week 3 since hospital induction and have not done a total of 30 mg's.... yet these are tough to shake even at my small dosage. Nevertheless the last three weeks have been very sober and focused ..... they make ya feel abnormally normal for sure. Be patient my friend for I assume you have a ways to rid yourself but like my Dr said .... .25-.5 is like jumping from a curb and twisting an ankle...NBD!
You were very instrumental in my actions and I will never forget ya ..... ever !
There for you now.
I'm still not 7 days .... but no longer afraid of em !
FYI ... I have not taken the Gabapenin but some say it works.... my suggestion is clonidine for days and I use Ambian at night 10 mg's .... sleep like a baby. Some suggest Tramadol for really rough spots but Dr's don't like to prescibe for us folk.
keep me posted ... keep fighting

Macboy


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 Post subject: How are you doing JDI ?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 9:23 am 
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It's been a while. I hope all is well. Are you into or getting closer to your jump.
How ya feeling ?

Macboy


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