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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 1:46 pm 
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Hi to all, im new here but a would consider myself a sub veteran of 10 yrs. I'll try to make my long sub story short as possible..in my early 20's I messed my back up from sports, went to a chronic pain specialist who stupidly put me on high doses of opiates that I of course soon discovered I couldnt manage..after 2 yrs, I was tired of going thru wd every month (running out of my scripts early) and sought out suboxone treatment, a bittersweet lifesaver for me. I switched to subutex with pregnancy in 2007 in which I had taken (6-8mg daily) religiously up until 3 weeks ago. I never intended on being on it for so long, I cant even count the amount of times I tried weaning off, but could never get passed 2mg without wd which i could never deal well with..my other excuse was that im also an RN, i went through school on sub and I have worked 6yrs around an abundance of opiates and it has been a blessing to not even have to think about taking that which is too easy to take, the abundance of narcotic waste is so "falsely" monitored. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise but it was my gradually increasing to dependancy of alcohol that landed me in rehab one month ago today, I knew it was my one chance to finally get off the sub, and let me tell u, the alcohol detox wd was shits and giggles compared to the sub. They switched me to suboxone film, pushed me up to 14mg (i know wtf right) then weaned me in a week to 2mg then..BAM, cut off..awful awful..But so as to not scare others, all my fellow rehabers who were put on the suboxone taper, post mostly roxy, oxy, or heroin use, did not seem to suffer much at all other then insomnia..I was not so lucky..and it was embarrassing as I felt like a pussy. Although the acute phase of wd was not the worst I've experienced, it was sooooo drawn out. Acute from day 1-7..10 days post I could finally sleep some, sneezed and yawned until day 20, night sweats left just 3 days ago. For now I just feel what one might describe as chronic fatigue..its hard to want to do anything, which sucks as in my mind alcohol would offer relief but I cant go back there either.
Anyways, this is my oops and question..unfortunately i just found approx 3mg of subutex on the floor near my bed..and yes, I took it like a dumbass..i feel better than Ive felt in weeks, though hard to remember opiate glow, not high, but strangely almost feels like the first time I took suboxone. I have no more of it, do not want to ever go thru that again but my fear and question is will my body revert back to remembering and put me back into wd later as if i never quit? And wonder how long it will be detected in a UA sent to the lab?


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 4:01 pm 
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Hi Lynzee, Welcome! I am so sorry that I don't know the answer to your question. I do have some questions regarding your detox and withdrawl story. So, you were at an inpatient detox facility for alcohol? What medication were you taking when there? And, you say that you were at 2 mgs of subs a day and they increased you only to return you to 2mgs and then dc that in a week? This all sounds very strange to me. And now its three weeks later, and you have been clean and off everything and you find 3 mgs of sub in your bedroom and take it and it made you feel good. Not high, just good? Well, first and foremost, no judgement here! I just wonder if you might be better to stay on the 2mgs of suboxone, deal with your addiction issues, get some clean time from alcohol under your belt, and then start a very slow taper from suboxone if you want off. Although, imho, 2mg of suboxone is what stopped you from getting into difficulty with the meds at work so I would probably just stay on it as a safeguard. I hope you understand what my concerns are and know that my feedback is just my thought about what would really help you. Please, stick around and keep us informed as to how you are doing! I am sure you will get additional responses from people with much more personal suboxone experience than myself.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2015 5:15 pm 
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I agree with Michelle. I'm not sure why you think it's in your best interest to be off sub when you're surrounded by narcotics all of the time. You say that sub has helped you to stay off the opiate medications you are surrounded with. What to do you expect to happen in the future. You've added alcohol to your addictions, but you are getting help for that. But what is going to keep your opiate addiction in check?

It sounds like you need to do some serious evaluation of why you are prone to addiction. Intensive therapy and group work would probably be very helpful to you. But why not keep your opiate addiction in remission with sub while you're working through it. I'm wondering if the 10 years you spent on sub was done without trying to gain insight into what your triggers are and what trauma you may need to deal with. I definitely suggest that whatever you decide to do, that you couple it with adjunctive therapy. You're worth it!

I apologize if I've misunderstood anything you've said. You are welcome here!

Amy

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2015 2:43 pm 
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So to clarify I was on 6mg subutex daily, when I got to rehab they switched me to suboxone film at 14mg daily, I had a fit tho and told them to rapidly taper me to 4mg x2days, then 2mgx2days then off. I started exp wd at 2mg/day. I completely understand concerns for not getting off it, especially with my job..but my craving lies more in alcohol for now, to be honest its been so long since I felt real opiate high or had a craving for opiates other than subutex..i do crave the subutex but dont ever want to go thru that wd again..i actually found another tab but refrained from taking surprisingly..i am getting drug tested through an intensive outpatient program so I know that wi help keep me in check for a while while I adjust to knewfound sobriety..suboxone is a miracle drug but I must say it is a feeling of freedom to be opiate free for first time in such a long time..i never thought about sub as an opiate when I was on it except for when my sub dr would forget to call my refill in or when I had a csection with no pain relief..these r some of the reasons for me to stay off for now, if u get injured or have surgery u r fucked on this drug, that is my only neg regarding it, but yes if i start to feel I will slip I will either get back on it or find new job, my lisence is not worth that


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2015 2:45 pm 
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Oh and i am doing 14 hrs a week in addiction therapy, will be going to meetings for the rest of my life. They really help surprisingly


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