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PostPosted: Sun Mar 24, 2013 4:00 am 
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Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 10:33 am
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when the fog and sickness go away, and I slowly recover from the "disease", I anxiously await the following:

1. Selfishness and self-centeredness of the opiate-charged mentality to be replaced by civility, humility, and the social graces of normal human existence while appreciating others beings unaffected/unadapted to opiate as survival mechanism.
2. Mental clarity and "perceived" higher capacity learning, cognitive function in general that seems to be lifted by opiate use from opiate starvation mode, to be replaced by the same characteristics of a well-nourished, exercised, and efficient, stable, and chemically/electrically balanced brain and CNS in general.
3. Isolated, unfaithful, dishonest, deceitful, trapped into simple and miserable "no escape from patterned thinking and doing", narrow-minded, passive (oh that'll work), seemingly calm but arguably paranoid, change-resistive, repeating-process while inconsiderate of options available, opiate-charged false sense of well-being to be replaced by "In your vast ocean, my ship is so small" mentality, God-fearing, open to change and new experience, "what if", and completely humble attitude of nomral balanced human existence.
4. Malaise-compromised, frightened of what tomorrow may bring, noncommital, and insecure opiate mentality to be replaced by thankful for today and looking forward to tomorrow, faith, self-esteem, and energetic approach to problems and opportunity.
5. Disregard for health, appearance, and belongings in the opiate world to be replaced by striving to thrive, maintaining and improving self being/esteem while balancing commitment to maintain and improve belongings.
6. Disorganized, erratic, and happenstance opiate-dominated behavior to be replaced by organized, consistent, and routine-oriented approach to living.
7. Only fun is doing opiates, mostly alone, avoiding social contact and potential confrontations opiate approach to be replaced by social activity, consistent sense of humor, and interpersonal state of existence with others, especially loved ones, pets etc. and challenging/confrontational leadership exchanges when appropriate.

Now before you presume that this is meant to impress you, I rather dictated this as a reminder to myself the reasons I have grown bored and lonely via opiate use, and the things I miss most about clean living.

I'd love to say that suboxone is a miracle expletive expletive new "pro" drug that allows me to be on the human side of comparisons.
I'd love to say that. I suppose that in some regards it has helped the shortcomings a bit, but, ..........I'd still love to say that.

Good night Irene!

_________________
'If you can't trade a cry for a good laugh, then opiates will rule your life forever'. -me
This is the reason I am ready to walk uphill for a finite infinity, in search of myself at the end of the marathon.


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Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
  • Asst Clinical Professor, Medical College of Wisconsin

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