It is currently Wed Aug 23, 2017 1:58 pm



All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Our Sponsors





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 44 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 11:24 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member

Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:36 pm
Posts: 879
Location: Wisconsin
What in the heck is going on around here? Actually, WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON AROUND HERE?????? Posts are disappearing. Posts are being locked. And now it's a ghost town - with less then a half dozen new posts in over 12 hours. Or perhaps there have been many more, only they have all been removed? WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?

I have been participating here for well over a year. So have several others. Yet I have not seen such questionable behavior in a long time. I see what was a very respectful, well written, thread by many people respectfully discussing their concerns - suddenly become locked. We are told that we'll have a response "after work" I guess that could mean in a day, a week, a month??? Then another very well written, very respectful, post is placed and several hours later… poof it evaporates into thin air. GONE!

WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?????

As it was very clearly pointed out, we already only really have one moderator who participates on any regular basis - at least as far as posts go. I then took a look and found several "Moderators" who have not even logged in FOR MONTHS!!! Talk about a crash and burn. Last person out turn off the lights.

I fully get that this is a hobby for most everyone involved. Yet, it involves a life and death topic. What can be more serious than the disease of opiate addiction? Are we seeing the death of this board right before our eyes? It would certainly seem to be the case. I can think of no quicker way to kill it than censorship - and when you have posts that disappear, threads that are locked with no reason given, that, my friends, is censorship - plain and simple. I really am somewhat shocked. I tell you this, if my posts disappears as well, I will never return. I cannot stand for censorship. It is wrong – no matter what you say the reasons are.

I guess, all I can say, yet again, is what in the hell is going on?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: exactly!
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 11:31 am 
Offline
Super-Duper Poster
Super-Duper Poster

Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2010 6:39 pm
Posts: 311
Donh,
I was trying to put my thoughts together just as you posted....and I'm shocked at what has happened. i realize this is not all about me, lol, but my post was taken way out of the real world....my biggest concern is this kind of "communist" approach going on...and it scares me. It's actually unacceptable. And as a community we need to change it. I have read and heard from credible people a lot of things going on behind the scenes that really is concerning...things that are dangerous to other's and with some very unprofessional and sick behavior. EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID: THIS IS A LIFE AND DEATH FORUM. Our disease kills us...resentments kill us...we cannot afford this kind of thing happening here and we need to be able to voice our feelings. As I say below...its like a dysfunctional family...sweep it all under the rug and pretend nothing is happening and do the insidious "crazy" that I, for one, grew up with but refuse to live in any more!

Why is it that one respectfully written post gets taken to a kind of extreme where people are so angry? Now there's all this talk about a moderator needing to step down...I NEVER once said that or even implied that. I said I had concerns and thought things COULD POSSIBLY be misconstrued by the way things have been responded to. As I said, if we don't stop to read and really try to look at what is written rather than take one sentence we don't like and then quickly react without all the information then we all will never communicate well.

I heard of another post being deleted today...I didn't get a chance to read it but it was written by someone that is very caring and thoughtful in their responses so I'm shocked it was deleted. I think at least we should have the option of seeing that someone wrote something and it was deleted rather than it just disappearing. Are we really so unable to think for ourselves that we can't discern what someone says and have our own opinions? And someone said something about that about my post...that people know its a forum and should be able to figure out what is the right thing or not. Very true. My concern was just that we need to be really careful and that I saw it happening...advice was possibly misconstrued by a new member who was sick in her addiction and I knew that the moderator had been Pm'd about responses and defensiveness before and I then took it to the community saying we all need to be careful about dosing advice…. all while saying really positive things about what are trying to accomplish here. I've never been involved in any kind of "catfight" here. I have never called anyone a name nor have I implied it. But a lot of others have and somehow my post is not ok? It caused so much chaos it was locked last night. I can't even comprehend that. I have always remained respectful and thoughtful and tried to give what I can on this site.I almost always try to give someone a positive about what they are doing even if I'm saying something difficult to them...pointing out an incongruency in what they are saying etc... It's not easy as we all know to write something that is read by a million people we don't know...so we all put ourselves out there when we post. I think it takes courage and I for one appreciate what I read here, even if I disagree with it. It gives me something to think about rather than my own thinking...even if I don't like it or I disagree I might get something out of it. I keep an open mind. Yet I'm told yesterday that I should find a new forum...that this one isn't for me. Why is that exactly? I have heard posts a lot worse than mine. I never dreamed I'd get the responses I did...and I got a lot not just on the forum.

Hatmaker works hard here there is no doubt about it. She answers every post practically. And with care and thought. I have learned a lot from her and have told her that when I read something especially poignant. She told me some very positive things during a recent personal episode and helped me process and did it without making me feel like an "addict". I appreciate it and told her so. The thing I would do differently in my post after stepping back and listening to all the responses I got (which I appreciate it...the positive and the negative) is I first thought about how I could not use the word moderator in my post....and I had taken about an hour when writing to figure out a way to not put this on just one person but my point was that moderators are looked at as more of experts even though we all know that isn't the case. And if I'd known this was going to be taken so personally I would have premised all of it by giving Hat the credit she deserves for being out there daily helping everyone. But as I wrote my post it had no anger or malice or anything in it so it didn't occur to me that it would be taken like it has. I've never said Hatmaker should "step down". I think what I said was when things are said that are looked at as 'criticism' maybe she could take a look rather then be defensive. How is that "taking someone out"?

What it feels like now is like a dysfunctional family. We have all lived in them or been around them. Instead of deal with some issues, let's sweep them under the rug and pretend they don't exist. And, not let's not talk about things...let's either attack or ignore. Healthy recovery means learning new tools...my goal on this site and in all areas of my recovery program is to learn new tools as my old ones certainly didn't work for me. And I'm not always going to be doing things right. I never will. But I'm open to learning.
Having posts deleted and PM's ignored and anything perceived as "negative" thrown back on the person who wrote it is old shit. I know when I grew up in my family it was be "HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY"....no other emotion was allowed. ANGER? Frustration? Questions posed about a behavior? OMG! GO TO YOUR ROOM! Seriously......So, is that how it is here? be HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY and don't express your real thoughts because we'll be sent packing? Or be bullied? Hey, I left my ex husband because he was a bully…I’m not going to be run off from a forum that helps me and that I believe I contribute positively to.
This is one of the better forums online and why can't we work to make it even better? I have seen a lot of bullying here just as others have written about and it really is unacceptable. We are very sensitive people, addicts... and that is a really good thing...because that is why we have the empathy we have and why we put ourselves out there to help another suffering addict. But we don't have to react sensitively whenever something is told to us that we find hard to hear. The gist of my post was just that... How does effective change occur if we aren't willing to look at the hard stuff? It stays stagnant and we stay stagnant.
You want to ban me now? So be it. Most likely this will be deleted.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:25 pm 
Offline
Super Poster
Super Poster
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 11:47 am
Posts: 130
i never really notice posts being deleted but then again im not that observant when it comes to that kind of stuff. I however have noticed that there is a lot less action here then the other forum i post at and it is concerning. the past week there have really been no posts on this entire forum (at least compared to the lasrt several months). I dont really know what the moderators job is (other then to search for content that is inappropriate) but i do know that something seems to be wrong here.


Top
 Profile  
 
Our Sponsors
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:29 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:59 pm
Posts: 993
Location: Carson City, Nevada
Donh, that was so well put! And Chinagirl, the same to you. I don't see why we cannot just talk differences out like the grown ups that we all are. We should be able to work through our concerns without it degenerating into....into what? A ghost town of a forum, I guess. I do not like the deleting of posts (or entire threads) and the locking of topics with no explanation. It should at least show that there was a post (thread) and that it was removed. Censorship is so unnecessary. Who is choosing what to take down and what to leave up and why? Do the rest of us that make up this collective body have any part in those choices? A forum is 'a place, meeting, or medium where ideas and views on a particular issue can be exchanged.' When you are reading only that which has been selected as appropriate or desirable for you to read, I cannot see how you can have much faith in the information or how you can even truly call it a forum. You can only wonder what is being hidden from you and for what reason, and unfortunately, you begin to lose respect and faith entirely, which is quite sad, because there is a huge amount of collective knowledge and experience on here. I'd hate to see that potential wasted. For the most part, people can disagree and keep it polite. We DO learn the most from those with whom we disagree. I would hate for all constructive discussion to evaporate and reappear in private messages, emails, and chats because we are (legitimately) concerned that anything we write may not pass an undefined, secret smell test and will be taken down altogether. I think the most eloquent way to put it is..."WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON!!??" Thank you, Donh, for pointing to the large, flashing, neon elephant in the room. I hope it results in an answer and not in another deletion. I'd appreciate if the deleted posts would be re-posted, that we each had the ability to decide for ourselves what we think, rather than having it decided for us because we have lost the ability to even form an opinion in the first place.

laddertipper (copying and pasting my post, just in case it goes 'POOF'!)

_________________
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: That is the problem
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:40 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:59 pm
Posts: 993
Location: Carson City, Nevada
Bitzy21 wrote:
i never really notice posts being deleted but then again im not that observant when it comes to that kind of stuff. I however have noticed that there is a lot less action here then the other forum i post at and it is concerning. the past week there have really been no posts on this entire forum (at least compared to the lasrt several months). I dont really know what the moderators job is (other then to search for content that is inappropriate) but i do know that something seems to be wrong here.


That right there is the problem. There is no way to know when something has been taken down, what was taken down, and why it was taken down, unless the poster copies and pastes it and PMs/emails it. The post/thread/poster simply vanishes, which creates unnecessary but understandable resentments. I think there has been more activity on here than it seems, but we don't have the right to see what it was. That's really what I'd like to have explained. Why can we not read the thoughts of other posters? What is it that we need to be protected from? People put A LOT of time and thought into drafting meaningful contributions to this forum, and to have it just erased without any cited cause seems an insult to those putting such effort into making valuable contributions to this group. I mean this respectfully. So, please don't take it down!!

laddertipper

_________________
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:51 pm 
Offline
Super-Duper Poster
Super-Duper Poster

Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2010 6:39 pm
Posts: 311
Laddertripper.....AMEN, sister!

Hey, this was the shortest post ever by me!!! Progress...LOL


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 1:34 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Apr 27, 2009 12:47 am
Posts: 1496
First, I'd like to apologize for not being as visible as usual on the forum. My laptop died, so my ability to be here has been impacted by that. Still, I have been here at least once a day, usually more than that and while I haven't had as much time to reply as I usually do, I still read basically every post on the forum. Most of the time you guys are handling things just fine and don't really seem to need a mod to step in. Generally, this forum runs really smoothly without a lot of interference from us moderators.

Contrary to concerns expressed above, we do NOT delete a lot of posts. In my time as a moderator, I think I have deleted like 2 or 3 posts, if that. If we edit a post, there will be a time stamp on the post along with a record of who edited it. If you've made a post and then can't find it or think it was deleted, please PM a mod so we can look into it.

Regarding chinagirl's thread that was locked: Jamez locked the thread because it was devolving into personal attacks. He said he would reopen the topic for discussion. I will ask him for an ETA on that. Locking a thread is one way that we as moderators have to deal with a heated topic before it erupts into a flame war. It preserves the posts that were made and it is still available for the rest of the forum to read. Our other opitons would be to move the thread to the moderator board, where regular members would not have access to it, or delete the thread, which would mean no one would have access to it.

Regarding setmefree's post that was deleted: The deleted post was an attempt to continue the conversation from the locked thread. The text of the post has been saved, and when Jamez unlocks the thread I will move the post there.

I am sad that there is so much negativity around these issues right now. There have been plenty of great posts on the forum lately, but whenever there is drama it sucks all the attention away from the positive things we are doing here. I hear your concerns about there not being enough moderator presence on the forum, and we will address that concern. I will say that the last person I offered the job to, turned it down, because yes, it is a thankless, pain in the ass task.

I also hear your concerns about threads being locked without explanation and posts being deleted, etc. I promise you that I will bring these issues up for discussion on the moderator board, and we will figure out a way to make our moderation activities more transparent.

Please don't hesitate to PM me with any other concerns that you have. I really hope you know that I, and the other mods, care deeply about the forum and all of the members. We are not perfect, but we are doing the best we can to enforce the forum rules and foster discussion and community at the same time. On a personal note, I have to say that it really fucking hurt to read that post calling out "the moderators" for failing to meet some undefined "higher standard" and stating that we have given inconsistent or unreliable advice that might have in fact been harmful to another member's recovery. If that is in fact the case, I would appreciate it if someone could point out to me just where I have done so, so that I can rectify the situation.

Despite the fact that I haven't been posting as much these past few weeks, I still spend 2 hours a day here on average, and often I am here even longer. I value this forum as part of my recovery and as a place where I can give back to other people who have suffered addiction as I have.

_________________
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

-Jack Kornfield


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 3:02 pm 
Donh, as usual, you bring up very valid concerns.....extreme concerns and I couldn't agree with you more.
Diary of a Quitter....You know (or should know) that I have absolutely nothing but respect for you and your work on this forum. And I would venture to guess that the same is true for everyone else who participates here. YOU are not the problem. NO ONE person is the problem, in fact.
While I understand the rationale for my post being deleted.....I still call "foul!" There was nothing in that post (that I can recall anyway, because I did not see the need to copy it) that would cause it to be immediately deleted. I don't recall breaking any forum rules at all.
So I continued a discussion that was arbitrarily, in dictatorship fashion, "locked" by ONE individual who holds power here? That is enough to make a new post vanish? Conversely, the final post on said thread (besides the one by Jamez) was full of disrespect and sunk so far as to bash other methods of recovery and showed overt favortism towards one member over others....yet that post was allowed to stand? And we can't even respectfully defend ourselves or respond in a civilized manner? Boy, oh boy.....something's really wrong with that!
I don't even know what else to say.......what a disappointment!


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 3:37 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Apr 27, 2009 12:47 am
Posts: 1496
The other thread is unlocked.

It was locked by Jamez to try to give people some time to step away from that discussion, which as I said was devolving into personal attacks, and to give him some time to come up with a response. It's not about a power trip.

I hear your concern that your post was unfairly removed. That is why I said I would restore it to the other thread. Please understand that we are doing the best we can to try to keep the forum from erupting into a flame war. The main reason that we are here is to share our experiences with Suboxone and to support each other in recovery, and we are trying to keep the forum focused on that.

_________________
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

-Jack Kornfield


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 3:58 pm 
Thank you, Diary of a Quitter, for your timely reply. I will await the restoration of my post from last night, assuming that it will be added to the thread started by Chinagirl.


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 4:07 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Apr 27, 2009 12:47 am
Posts: 1496
It's already done.

_________________
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

-Jack Kornfield


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: DOAQ
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 4:35 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:59 pm
Posts: 993
Location: Carson City, Nevada
Thank you so much for responding. I want to second what was said about having respect for you and your role on this forum. From what I've 'heard' from the others on here, you are very well-liked and considered fair and reasonable. In fact, I've never heard anyone put you down. Quite the opposite.

As for posts being deleted and there being a time stamp, I am confused. I started a thread about Dr. Phil, and on Feb. 3rd, it was brought to my attention that someone had posted two responses inside that thread expressing some concerns with the forum. I did read them before they were deleted, and I PMd you to let you know I didn't know it was going to be posted, even though it was inside a thread that I did start. You replied and let me know that you checked it out and it looked okay. The thing is that the responses made by the person I was referring to were deleted fairly quickly. However, there's no time stamp or record of who edited it, as far as I can see, and I know that I'm not the only one who read these particular responses inside the thread. Apparently, it was posted in several other threads and was deleted from those as well. Obviously, someone else deleted it, so I'm wondering if you are even able to see what was posted and then deleted or if posts are being deleted and there is not record of them. That would explain the fact that you thought the thread looked fine. I'm not sure how it works. If you are a moderator and you pull up a thread, does it pull up the posts that have been deleted?

Thanks,
laddertipper

_________________
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 5:44 pm 
Offline
Super-Duper Poster
Super-Duper Poster

Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2010 6:39 pm
Posts: 311
Somebody in an earlier post said something about this is a Forum for Suboxone and recovery. That is EXACTLY what my original post was about. Not once did I name anyone, or call anyone out, and as I said if people would stop, take a breath, and really read something before reacting to a word or phrase that sets off an emotional trigger things would be simpler. So many times we jump to assumptions and conclusions...and I'm very much quilty of this myself.
For example the quote below by DOAQ:
QUOTE: "On a personal note, I have to say that it really fucking hurt to read that post calling out "the moderators" for failing to meet some undefined "higher standard" and stating that we have given inconsistent or unreliable advice that might have in fact been harmful to another member's recovery. If that is in fact the case, I would appreciate it if someone could point out to me just where I have done so, so that I can rectify the situation. "

Let's clear that one up. I didn't call out the moderators saying they failed to meet some higher standard. Taking it personally by saying "it fucking hurt" is part of what I am talking about here...why be defensive? I didn't say anyone failed to meet some higher standard and in fact I said I guess I hold them to a "higher" standard and in the same sentence went on to say that I know that is not the right wording...but that my fears are that newcomers, especially people new to a forum, new to recovery and still affected by opiates in their thinking will take moderators as experts and that we all, especially moderators, need to be careful. I even look at the moderators here as kind of the "last word" on advice. I assumed they have been chosen to be moderators based on how much they know about Sub, length of time on the forum, etc...Why is this point so difficult to see? I'm not a perfect writer but these reactions seem a bit much to me. and once again, that was my point. No need for defensiveness...what we do is hear what someone says, take it in, take a look at it and then we know what our truths are and what needs changing...then change what needs changing, if anything. I don't know any better than anyone else what needs changing. I only know for me. I just saw continued defensiveness whenever something was said and its not healthy. And I would PM someone first, but that had already been done.

I'll say this again...communication is very difficult in emails and what someone may be really thinking might come out quite differently. its a risk we take. I meant no offense to anyone. And I appreciate that you, DOAQ, have made a response today. I have missed your responses and have appreciated when you respond. I just have no idea about any other moderator because i haven't heard much. And I have said very positive things about Hatmaker...I make a comment and a suggestion and it becomes all of this....complete chaos, degradation, hurt feelings, feelings of retaliation, defensiveness...etc....I guess my point has been made.

What has become very apparent is something has been going on long before I came to this site...and its all coming out. Something was triggered by what I wrote and my only intention was to point out some things that concerned me over the past couple of months. What I suggest is let's use this to make the forum better...obviously there are a lot of resentments that people have about things I know nothing about. Is there a "suggestion box"? How do moderators have a check and balance for things they post and advise? It would be very detrimental to many for this to continue to go "crazy" and lose the focus of why we are here...and my post was all about why we are here and how to make it a little safer.


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 8:48 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jul 15, 2010 5:08 am
Posts: 1503
I reckon that if people have a problem with how this place is run, then why not start your own forum? It's easy as these days. My dog could do it. Schisms happen all the time in any decent movement, church, politik. At least then we could have two forums focused on recovery, instead of one forum reduced to a Gerry Springer farce.

Moderators can run a forum how they please. Forums are not a democracy. They are more like a business. If you don't like the product or how it's run, then simply take your business elsewhere.

And please quit the commie bashing. It's really quite a good ideology, at least in principle :D


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: To My New Cyber Family
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 11:06 pm 
Offline
Moderator
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2011 12:35 am
Posts: 2802
Location: Southwest
I'm very disappointed to read all the negative postings of late. This place is still fairly new to me and it is important that it maintain its high level of clean and sober members. My very life depends on you all. Yes, I have other recovery places like AA and such, but it is here that I come for my daily balance.

So please, like my momma used to say "If you can't say something nice about a person, say nothing at all"

Thank you all for all you do.

Tom


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 11:18 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Mar 31, 2010 12:20 am
Posts: 8
I don't post often and mostly just lurk. From an outside perspective, there is a lot of negativity on the forum. It seems there are many people focused primarily on complaining about the forum, moderators, and what other people post. There has been tremendous negativity about suboxone and this has been ongoing despite the rules. There has been what appear as blatant attempts to push the limits of the rules and test the moderators. (And the patience of the rest of us reading and not posting). There have been multiple attacks of specific people. When I first joined, this forum was, I think, what Dr. Junig intended it to be. It seems now that it is a place where people complain about what it is.

I recall a prior uprising that resulted in the demotion of a moderator. The anger on the forum at that time was for much the same reasons. Deleted posts, edited posts, multiple corrections, and many didn't understand why that was happening then too. I agree that censorship is dangerous and people need to be careful with it. I also think the public complaining is tacky and somewhat rude. This is especially when moderators cannot really defend themselves. If there was no moderation on this site, it would turn into an anti-suboxone forum very quickly. People are drawn to negativity. Look at how many people read these negative threads versus one where someone is asking for help. Look at how many people were drawn out of the woodwork just to comment in the past couple of days.

I think everyone has been heard loud and clear with their complaints. Can people just take a step back, take a deep breath, agree to let the past roll off, and agree to move on in a more positive and constructive way? I think if those of you complaining about the moderation take a step back, stop pushing the limits of the moderators, and just wait, you will see that things might change. But if you keep on pressing and you keep bothering them about it, you will only be met with resistance and frustration. Keep in mind with the moderators that as often as you feel like the site is over moderated and censored, there are others who believe it is sometimes under moderated in some respects. They have to please the masses and that can be difficult to do. But from what I have seen, all of the moderators on this site are reasonable, kind, caring people trying to do the right thing by everyone and they are likely to genuinely hear what you are saying if you stop backing them against a wall.

Again, can everyone just take a step back, let the past roll off, and move on in a positive and constructive way? If you continue to have concerns, do you have to start a public uprising or can you try to deal with it privately? If you haven't first tried dealing with it privately, then you are probably wrong to post it publicly.

Thank you for allowing me to post my opinion.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 12:04 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member

Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:36 pm
Posts: 879
Location: Wisconsin
Very well written and thoughtful post Brighteyes. It looks like you have been around here for nearly a year yet rarely have posted. There are several others that fall into a similar category. If nothing else, whatever it is that went on here the past couple of days has served to get some other people to participate - like yourself. I think that is a good thing. Who wants to hear from the same people over and over again (I am very much included in that) when there are others that are capable of some great comments? You certainly are correct Brighteyes, in that we have heard from many new/old/different people. In fact, I can't remember the last time I received so many responses to one of my posts in such a short period of time. Whatever the reason, I still think it's a good thing.

I just want to be very, very clear, that for me personally, I have no personal issues with the moderators. Not at all. Just like I don't have personal issues with the people in my life whom I love. That does not mean I don't disagree with what they do or say sometimes. I don't love them any less - even if I don't agree with them sometimes. Just because I may not agree with the actions of a moderator or anyone else here does not mean I don't like them, don't respect them or don't think that they have done great things here. HatMaker for one dedicates a huge portion of her day to this board. I certainly hope just because someone may not agree with something she says or does that they are calling for her head, don't like her or want her removed - or De-Moderated as someone put it (still not sure where in the hell that term came from). HatMaker puts in much more time here than I am willing to and I think it’s awesome that she does. And actually, in this case, I have no concerns with anything she has done. That does not mean I may not take issue with something she says or does in the future. It may happen - and I will like and respect her just is much if it does. Hell, Diary of a Quitter doesn’t even take Suboxone anymore (and has been off it for a long time) and she still hangs around and helps the rest of us. How cool is that?

I honestly never really understood all that much what the initial concern was. Call me stupid, but I just didn't get it and I guess didn't agree with a lot of it, which is why I didn't get involved in the initial discussion. It was not until posts got locked, then another post disappeared WHILE I WAS READING IT, and then we sort of got scolded like children and told what we cannot talk about or we are really going to be in trouble. That is where my concerns came in. I have been asked several times to become a moderator and have declined each time. What has gone on recently is one of the major reasons why. I just didn't want to have the added responsibility and then be questioned for what I do or say. So I have respectfully declined the "promotion". That still doesn't mean I have to agree with each and every decision they make - or have to like it. That doesn't mean I want any of the mods to quit, or be removed or that I no longer like or respect them. Not at all. And ya know what, I'll bet they don't agree with everything I do or say either. Imagine that. We can actually disagree and still be friends!

Stopping people form bashing Suboxone and those who take it is a good thing. Stopping people from personal attacks is a good thing. Removing malicious posts or SPAM is a good thing. Trying to prevent conflict is a difficult if not impossible job to begin with not to mention a bit senseless. We are not all going to agree all the time - and that's okay. How does that saying go, I may not always agree with what you have to say but I will fight to the death of me for your right to say it. That’s all I’m trying to do.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 12:18 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 3:20 am
Posts: 516
I have noticed that there is a pattern in all of this. Seems there is a 3 month cycle where this sort of thing happens. Perhaps there is an analysis that could be government-funded to research this effect.

I have been a moderator for 3+ years now, I think. I am pretty quiet and just keep an eye on things and occasionally respond to a post, mainly because I don't really have much to add or someone beats me to it. Also, I don't reveal much about myself which unfortunately sucks because of events like this, being a moderator I feel that I can't. It seems I have to set an 'example' or something. So, very few know about me, my history, how I am doing, my favorite color, etc. I have to always remain guarded it seems.

I honestly do. I have posted a few things in the last few days, and some who have never spoken to me instantly barrage me with questions. Not a 'hi', 'nice to meet you', 'keep up the good work (that will NEVER happen obviously, moderation seems to be a thankless job)', etc., etc..

I really hope all this crap can be dropped and we can move on. If posts got deleted, they got deleted. I'm sure it happened for a reason. If I lock a post, I lock a post. It doesn't usually stay locked forever. Sometimes I lock them because they become 4 pages long and have about 12 different subjects and cannot even be followed anymore in a rational way.

_________________
Image
mmmm donuts!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:25 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member

Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:36 pm
Posts: 879
Location: Wisconsin
I got a great laugh out of your first paragraph. Very funny. Hell, given all of the things our tax dollars have been wasted on, you might be able to get this study funded.

I unfortunately then came to your final paragraph, where it pretty much said to me, "tough luck, live with it" "too bad if the post that took you an hour to create was deleted, live with it" And the fact that there was a reason, well, people shoot and kill others for what they believe is a very good reason. Having even a great reason does not always make it right. If our posts, our thoughts, our time has so little value, that we should just live with our work being removed or locked by one person, perhaps that speaks volumes.

On the other hand, I have been on the other side of things like this and fully understand how it feels when people take what you do for granted. I would hope everyone knows that no one gets paid for anything that they do here - at least I certainly don't think that they do. I have never stopped appreciating the time that you and the other moderators put in here. I think it is great and should be valued - just like everyone else who takes the time to read and post - ie participate. It goes both ways.

Being the silent behind the scenes guy even makes it harder for people to appreciate and understand. Being someone who does a lot of behind the scenes work himself (that people don't often realize) I totally get being under appreciated. The fact that you don't put your fingers in everything and butt in is also very admirable. It's just that, no one is beyond reproach or beyond being questioned - even a moderator.

Most importantly, I am dieing to know, WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR :)

Thanks for taking the time that you do to keep things running. By my calculations, you may want to block out the week of May 15-21, 2011 to prepare for the next up-rising.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Jamez
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 5:11 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:59 pm
Posts: 993
Location: Carson City, Nevada
I truly do appreciate the time that you moderators invest in this forum. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for keeping this a place where people chose to come share some of the most difficult aspects of their lives.

I absolutely think that, for the most part, the people on this forum would like to put this behind us and get back to recovery-related discussions. I'm politely asking if you could just answer my questions about posts that are/were deleted. I want to understand what is going on. I'm not the only one who is unclear on this question, so perhaps if you could answer me, it would clear it up for a number of us. I know there were a two posts deleted from a thread entitled 'Dr. Phil~Did you see this?' on February 3rd. There are no entries showing they were deleted or why. I did copy and paste them before they were deleted. I don't want to post them on here myself. I just want to understand why they were removed but left no trace, and whether the decision to delete them was made by one person or multiple people. I want to understand how the decision to delete posts is made and whether that ability can or cannot be misused, perhaps without the other moderators even knowing.

Thank you so much,
laddertipper

_________________
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 44 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Our Sponsors
Suboxone Forum latest topics RSS feed Subscribe to the entire forum
 

 

 
Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
  • Asst Clinical Professor, Medical College of Wisconsin

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group