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PostPosted: Sun Apr 11, 2010 11:53 pm 
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Im posting this thread to hear the good and bad that has come from your suboxone treatment!

FOr me suboxone saved my life! at the end of my addiction i was takeing 160mg of oxys a day it took over my life to the point were my oxy perscription was more important then any thing on this earth. i would be at the pharmacy the minute it open in withdrawl waiting to get that refill not matter what it meant i missed or who i hurt. all i cared about was that high and i was takeing it orginally for pain which turned into a 4 year addiction on the devil aka oxycontin 80s. No matter who i hurt whether it was my family,my friend, my gf all i cared about was that high to take me away from all the worrys in my life. one time my mom needed a ride to the hospital and i told her no cause i was waiting at the pharmacy for my script thats how bad things got at the end of my treatment on oxy. things got so bad that i was sleeping half the day and high the other half eatting junk food going to sleep right after when i first started oxy i weighed 208 pounds when i stopped oxy i was coming in at 288 pounds inches away from becoming a diabetic and that was the turning point. cause for a month i had to poke my fingers with needels to report my BS and i just could take it no more. so one day i ran into a old friend who told me all about suboxone and the wonders it has done for him. so he walked me threw step by step suboxone.com to find the drs in my area and i found one 5 mins away from my house. now the ever worst wait to see the doc. i had to wait 2 months b4 i could b seen which meant 2 more months of oxy an like i said if i would of gone on much longer i would of became a diabetic. so i was at a brick wal lnot knowing what to do, so i continued takeing oxy for about 2 weeks till i got a phone call from the sub doc saying they had a opening and i was 4th on the lwaiting list but the first 3 could not make the app so that meant if i could make it in by 3 i could start my treatmen. every since that day my life has turned around better then i ever knew.

The first thing that had to be done now was get my health back on track. which i did i started working out dayily which has become part of my routine and has doen wonders for me. im down to 215 eating nothing but healthy food and no more junk food no matter how bad i want it. this lead to not being a diabetic and no more needels to poke in my fingers. an i have made new friends as well going to the gym which is a good thing cause we all know what can happen if you hang out with old friends during the early part of our treatment.

the first year on sub was real rough due to the pain in my knee and the craveings i would get from that but my mom stuck by my side day in and day out to make sure i beat this addiction. so things started to finally look a lil better and one day i told my parents im ready to get back in school. so i started out at the community college takeing nights classes it was hard at first i got to admitt but i had one really good teacher who helped me with anything i needed and she gave me my first A ever and after that school became something i enjoyed not just something i did to make my parents happy. after i finished up general studys i had a meeting with a couns. about what i wanted to do with my future as in a major and if i wanted to tranfer once im ready. now this was about my 2nd year on sub. so im cleaned up and told him i would like to get into chemical dependency classes and learn about how to become a drug couns. and one day maybe a sub doc or i would like to talk at high schools about addiction. luckily enough chemical dependency was a major at my school and i could get all the easy classes out of the way at the community college b4 i transfered out. which was great cause that meant i saved money and when i did go to a different school i would know the basics so it wasnt all new to me. and im 5 credits away from being ready to transfer an have gotten nothing lower then a B for grades. im now on my 3rd year of suboxone an things are going well.

in short this is what suboxone has done for me. i got my life back got back in school getting good grades, my health, my TRUE friends and my gurl and most of all my FAMILY WHICH MEANS MORE TO ME THEN ANYTHING!

and last but not least when i look in the mirror im happy with what i see and who i became from that ex.

oh yea the 3 years ive been on sub i have never relapsed failed a ua or taken more then perscribed but im not perfect i have not gone to as many meetings as i would like.

sorry for my bad spelling i type real fast and never spell check if i left anything out sorry.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 9:43 am 
Thank you for sharing you story Bboy! What a great story it is! You've come a long way. I was just thinking about the friend who referred you for Suboxone treatment......what a great friend that was! It's crazy that so many people are struggling with this and know nothing about this option for treatment. I'm glad you found your way to it. You need to take your due credit also. You've done a lot of work to get to where you are. Getting into school, making good grades and having goals is something only you can do! The Suboxone didn't do that for you! The medication just allows us a choice in what to do with our lives, in my opinion. Before Sub, I didn't have a choice on so many things. With Sub, I can choose again. So, good for you! You're making good choices and getting rewarded for it. Keep going.....finish your degree and go help others who struggle just like you have!
Thanks again for sharing.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 11:00 am 
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What a great story...good for you! Congratulations on your success in school - isn't it wonderfully rewarding? I'm so glad suboxone allowed you to make so many positive changes in your life.

What suboxone did for me:
I can easily say it saved me life as well. I, too, started taking opiates for pain and it wasn't long before it was spinning out of control. I remember those waits at the pharmacy, wondering did they knew I was an addict? So much guilt and shame. I was nodding off in mid-sentence, family and friends talking until they were blue in the face - nothing mattered except my pills. By the end I was also smoking pot 24 hours a day. All that and with the exception of nodding off, I still couldn't sleep. And I was taking too many and going into withdrawals every month. My husband would keep my pills but I always found them and still took too many. I was a mess and it felt hopeless with no way out. I knew I couldn't just walk away because as far as I was concerned because of my pain conditions, I would have to be on pain meds the rest of my life. I knew nothing about suboxone except that my psychiatrist said it could help me get off the pain meds. I knew I would die, because I was so close to overdosing so many times. And my marriage and sanity were hanging by a thread. The first to go was my sanity. In order to get sleep I took too much benadryl and finally cracked up. It was the best thing that could have happened to me. They put me on suboxone and even though they told me nothing about it, it was a turning point for me. Turns out the suboxone actually helped my pain! Still does.

Now 16 months later I'm still on suboxone, still in therapy, my marriage is back on track, and plan to remain on suboxone for the long haul. It saved my life and so many other things as well. I quit smoking pot, too, except for twice in the past year; I barely drink at all either. The best part of it all - I'm HAPPY. That's the first time in my life I've ever been able to say that. I'm happier now than I ever was pre-addiction.

Thank you suboxone!

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 9:17 pm 
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I think this is an awesome idea for a thread and I appreciate that you posted it. I have been in a bit of a funk for a few days and was feeling a little down that I am an addict to begin with. But your story and melissa's story made me smile and I realize that with suboxone, it really isn't all that bad to be an addict.

The suboxone truly gave me my life back. I have always dabbled with the drugs here and there although never got in as deep as I did with the oxycontin. I was on about 280mg per day when I got on suboxone and had been doing that for about 2 years. I have been on suboxone for about 3 years. In that three years I shut down my business and got into a new career that is FAR less stressful. I couldn't do that before because I couldn't pass the drug test at the place I wanted to work. I also couldn't get it together long enough to make an interview, plan anything, let alone start a new job because I was in withdrawal off and on all the time. Getting rid of that business (I know it is the American dream to be self employed but I hated the industry I was in and the stress was just awful) was the best thing for my life and my marriage.

Coming clean with my husband that I had gotten addicted to oxycontin and was on suboxone was actually great for our relationship as I know I can always be honest with him about EVERYTHING. I open up far more about everything now and he can do the same with me. So I feel like I gained a true life partner. I planned my wedding on suboxone and got married on suboxone.

I have my family back and my nephews. My family had always been so proud of me until the pain killer habit and I just always knew how afraid they were for me. They were disappointed and scared of where I was heading. Now I can go on family vacations and spend time with my family. I can be relied upon to do what I say I will do.

I have been able to live day to day without stress and fear and withdrawal. I surely would have died if I continued what I was doing and in fact was ready to die at the end. I would picture in my mind pulling the trigger over and over and over again day after day before I found suboxone. I really just feel like every day that I have a CHOICE is a gift. I don't have to worry anymore. I don't have to feel like a loser and wonder when my life will fall apart. I am happy. I have my free will back and anyone who has lived without it knows exactly what an amazing thing that is.

Cherie


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 12, 2010 9:45 pm 
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Suboxone truly was like a wonder drug for me. It not only took away withdrawal and opiate cravings, it also allieviated my depression and helped a lot with my pain issues.

Suboxone made me a better parent - not obsessing about finding pills, getting high, being sick, etc., I was able to be present for my daughter in a way that I really hadn't for many months. That was so huge for me. The first six months of my Sub treatment I really remember just doing a lot of stuff, spending tons of quality time with my kid and it was great.

Because of Suboxone, I was able to go back to school (I'd taken a year off because I was just too unstable from the ups and downs of my active addiction) and graduate from my Associates Degree program. Then I started my current program for Chemical Dependency Counselor. After I complete this program I plan to work as a CD counselor while I finish my BA and eventually go to grad school to be a therapist.

Because of Suboxone, I was able to work while going to school & contribute to supporting my family. Because it relieved a lot of my pain, I was able to take dance and yoga classes and work out at the gym. Because I could no longer base my social life on getting high, I was forced to find other fun things to do and to make new friends.

I also started writing again when I started Suboxone. My blog got me a little bit of attention and led to my first paid writing gigs...so I have Sub to thank for that as well.

Sub basically let me put my life back on track. It gave me the stability I needed to figure stuff out and fix some problems in my life. And after 2 years, I honestly felt ready to taper off. A lot has happened in the months since I stopped taking Sub, but the lessons and skills that I was able to learn while I was on Suboxone have served me well.

I've been off Suboxone since last August, so 8 months now, and I can honestly say that not only have I not suffered any long-term PAWS or anything - I also went through the death of my father and greiving that loss, and I tapered off my antidepressants, and I'm doing fine. I'm still in school full-time and working part-time. Life has its ups and downs and I certainly have to work at it and do what I need to do to take care of myself, but overall things are good and I know I am better off for having been on Suboxone.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 14, 2010 1:32 am 
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yea hat once i got back in school i felt a thing i never felt b4 about myself. that first A changed my whole outlook and now school was something i liked not just something i did to like i said b4 make my parents get off my case. and now im studying something i like and my true goal is to help one young or old mind a day and im happy. to me the ultimate high in my eyes would be able to help somebody like our suboxone drs have done for us. and i truely want to talk at high schools because i remember when people like myself now would come in and talk to us about drugs and i was the one in the back cracking up oh that will never happen to me hahahaha this person is a joke how can they get addicted but now i understand every single thing they said. and i want to change young minds more then anything just give them a glimpse of whats to come if they dont change their ways.


IM VERY GLAD I STARTED THIS THREAD I HAVE READ ALL THE POST AND THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR SHAREING YOUR STORY WITH ME AND EVERYONE ELSE. TO KNOW THIS DRUG HAS DONE SO MANY GREAT THINGS FOR US AMAZES ME HOW SOME COULD SAY THE TERRIABLE THINGS THEY DO ABOUT SUBOXONE ONLY IF THEY READ SOME OF THESE POST THEN TO HEAR WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY WOULD BE NICE.


OH yea thankyou all for the kind words its you that are the reason ill never leave this site and will only praise the highest and kindest words about it.

Brent


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 14, 2010 7:37 am 
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Hello ALL,
Bboy you started a great thread with your story. I think yours is a text book treatment and Recovery story..... Of course it is a continuing story But a great one none the Less!! Congratulations on your success thus far. I'm sure your story as well as others will be a form of inspiration to anyone who is browsing this Forum and that's what it's ALL about :) !! I have been on the Suboxone wellness train since Feb. '09 with great results SO FAR...... I know we are ALL just one Oxy or DOC away from relapse..... But with the support system I have built up including Suboxone and this Forum along with counseling & therapy I have given myself the BEST chance to function as a " Normal" person! I know I'm in the early stages of my Recovery and Suboxone is NOT the answer to ALL my problems, But it has allowed me to focus on the things I need to and start to climb my way out of the hole I had put myself in while in active addiction.... It's going to take time to FIX the things I destroyed while using But at least I am able to start on the road to Recovery. I owe all this and anything I re-gain in the future to Suboxone and my Support system including all of you that post out here.... It's a great day to be Clean & Sober!!!! :D Take care everyone and I wish you the Best of luck in your Recovery!! :!:

God Bless
TW


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 14, 2010 11:18 pm 
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TWINPLY wrote:
Hello ALL,
Bboy you started a great thread with your story. I think yours is a text book treatment and Recovery story..... Of course it is a continuing story But a great one none the Less!! Congratulations on your success thus far. I'm sure your story as well as others will be a form of inspiration to anyone who is browsing this Forum and that's what it's ALL about :) !! I have been on the Suboxone wellness train since Feb. '09 with great results SO FAR...... I know we are ALL just one Oxy or DOC away from relapse..... But with the support system I have built up including Suboxone and this Forum along with counseling & therapy I have given myself the BEST chance to function as a " Normal" person! I know I'm in the early stages of my Recovery and Suboxone is NOT the answer to ALL my problems, But it has allowed me to focus on the things I need to and start to climb my way out of the hole I had put myself in while in active addiction.... It's going to take time to FIX the things I destroyed while using But at least I am able to start on the road to Recovery. I owe all this and anything I re-gain in the future to Suboxone and my Support system including all of you that post out here.... It's a great day to be Clean & Sober!!!! :D Take care everyone and I wish you the Best of luck in your Recovery!! :!:

God Bless
TW


Thankyou for the kind words TW. and even better to hear your story as well. isnt it great man just to know you did it and are on the way to your recovery? one thing i wanted to say to you is you said "I owe all this and anything I re-gain in the future to Suboxone" YES SUBOXONE WAS A BIG PART OF IT BUT YOU OWE ALL THIS TO YOURSELF! YES subox0one has been a big part of you success but at the end of the day its just a pill meaning YOU did it not a pill. everyday u wake up and take that pill its you not suboxone and just wanted to say great job man cause like i said YOU DID IT!


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PostPosted: Sat May 01, 2010 1:13 am 
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Bump


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PostPosted: Sat May 01, 2010 10:33 am 
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Suboxone changed my life for today because I didn't have to:
Get up and count how many pills I had left
See where the guy that lies to me and rips me off is today, because I took too many pills yesterday
Leave my family to go meet him
Stop by the bank and take out money that was meant for groceries and the electric bill
Wait in a parking lot until he calls and says the other party didn't show up
Wait some more because there's still hope I may get some more pills
Worry about that strange car in the parking lot. I hope thats not the police.
Get my pills (the guy didn't have as many as he said but they cost more. Suprise!)
Worry on the way home, what I am going to do about Sundays pills
Go to the store and try to get 100.00 dollars of groceries on 20.00, put the Doritos my kids love back on the shelf
Get home and wonder how to keep the electricity from being turned off on Monday
Kick myself for doing this again

Because of suboxone today I get to:
Have a cup of coffee instead of a pill first thing
Listen to the birds sing outside my window that I never would have noticed
Be proud of myself
Go help my mother with some gardening
And I am going to get groceries today, including the Doritos my kids love and a lot of their other favorites
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PostPosted: Tue May 04, 2010 2:28 pm 
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Let me see.....When I made the decision to get on suboxone, I was crunching up a fist-full of 20mg oxycontin tablets every day, I was risking my career and my marriage to get the drugs, and having previously had a gigantic IV Heroin habit, I was heading down that path once again. It was a living hell. And given that I have HepC I was definitely accelerating my death.

Suboxone allowed me to stop using drugs so that I could focus on myself and get in therapy to deal with the issues that put me on the path to drug abuse in the first place. I am not someone who just got addicted to narcotic pain meds because of some injury. I know donh doesn't like the term "junkie" but I am an old-school junkie from way back. And I remind myself regularly that I'm a junkie because I've relapsed a hundred times because I keep "forgetting" I'm a junkie.

My suboxone doctor tells me I am a very good candidate for being a "lifer" on the subs and that's fine by me.

It gave me my life back.


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PostPosted: Tue May 04, 2010 2:48 pm 
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Just to be fair, I really don't have nearly as much of an issue if you want to call yourself a junkie. My concern (a month or two ago now) was when you referred to the rest of us here as junkies - or dysfunctional junkies is what I think the term was. You can call yourself anything that you want to - although having read your posts for a while now, I think you are selling yourself short. You seem to have come a long way from the junkie that you once may have been. I hope you give yourself the credit that you are due.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 8:04 am 
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donh wrote:
Just to be fair, I really don't have nearly as much of an issue if you want to call yourself a junkie. My concern (a month or two ago now) was when you referred to the rest of us here as junkies - or dysfunctional junkies is what I think the term was. You can call yourself anything that you want to - although having read your posts for a while now, I think you are selling yourself short. You seem to have come a long way from the junkie that you once may have been. I hope you give yourself the credit that you are due.


That wasn't me that referred to everyone here as "dysfunctional junkies," I was just referring to that post in which you castigated the use of those terms (which, by the way, I "get"). :D

And thanks for your kind words, donh. I appreciate it. And I DO give myself SOME credit.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 2:16 pm 
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Whoops - sorry about that. I didn't mean to put words in your mouth. I guess it's proof that I didn't really take any of it very personally since I don't even remember who really said it. My memory seems to be getting worse these days. I'm sure it's the Suboxone that is causing it. [SARCASM]


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 3:43 pm 
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No worries, friend 8)


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PostPosted: Sat May 08, 2010 9:10 am 
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Reading your stories is such an inspiration to me and some of it I could write about myself. I love Suboxone Success' post because it really hit home. I living that life now of worrying about how many pills I have, spending money I literally do not have (I just wrote a post dated cheque to myself to get pills) Money that needed to go to bills and other essentials. I've dug myself a deep hole and will be picking up the pieces of my life long after I start Sub on Tuesday. I also have gone to score and wondered about being busted, actually one of my close sources just got busted a week ago!! I wonder if the cops saw my number on her phone... I snort about 5 or 6 20's a day and sometimes more. I've isolated and have no social life. But the thing I feel worst about is not really being "there" for my kids this past year. Oh sure I'm here in the physical sense but my mind is occupied with pills 24-7. I hate what I've become and pray that by going on sub I'll have a chance to get my life together and really be able to have hopes and dreams for the future and not walk around with this sense of impending doom - which has actually lifted slightly since i made the choice to go on sub.

I finally feel like I'm going in the right direction. My induction is just a few days away and not soon enough! I plan on getting into some serious aftercare so I can address the issues that led me down the path I'm on to begin with. I hope to update this post soon and tell everyone how |'ve been able to turn my life around and live a life I can be proud of and that my kids can be proud of. I plan on making up for "lost" time with them and getting back on track again. A big thank you to all who shared their stories. It gives me a lot of hope, something I haven't had in a long time.


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PostPosted: Sat May 08, 2010 9:36 am 
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free_bird:

With that kind of attitude, you're going to do GREAT on suboxone! I am sure of it! You will see what it's like to take control of your life back. You will see what it's like to not be consumed with never-ending thoughts of getting and using pills. You will see what it's like to have some peace of mind in knowing that you are truly taking care of yourself.

Hang in there, free_bird, much, much better days are ahead :)


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