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PostPosted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:26 pm 
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Well I guess I will tell my story the best I can. My father died when I was 9 years old of a drug over dose his father and grandfather also died of Drug abuse related problems. But besides that I had a pretty normal life my mother was a singal parent to me and my brother who was born 6 monthes before my fathers death she tried hard and worked hard to give us what we needed and most of what we wanted. Well my first introduction to drugs was with my father he took me every were so when he was using I was there watching wondering what he was doing I was young I thought my father could do no wrong I would find out later in life that his drug use really stuck with me. lets fast foward a little to after my father died again my mother did her best to bring us up but she did her fair share of drugs when she was younger I can remember watching here from upstairs when she was having partys snorting coccain off the table with her frieds she had no Idea I was watching but I was that really stuck with me still to this day I think about that. My mother finaly found Terry my step Dad he took care of us like we were his own kids he worked hard and loved his refer so once again my father figure is doing drugs around me if we went fishing witch we did a lot of he was smoking there is a pattern emerging here wow. So we now go to my freshmen year of High school I was playing football witch I have done every year since I was 7 I was pretty good so I got to start on the varsity team that hurt I tore my shoulder up had two surgerys the doc gave me PERCOCET 10/650 90 a week I loved them there every Thursday I pick them up this went on for years I was pretty poplure in school and a athlet so I got away with most every thing I did I went to school once so fucked up walking the halls high the princible seen me took me to his office and called my mom she came and got me and there was no consequences for that one got away scott free. I made it through High School had knee surgery still getting percs same Doctore never no question.Now I find my self going in and out of the ER getting IV pain med there the best I even had surgey I realy could have went with out just for the meds thats pretty sick but thats the addict mind couple years later I'm now married with two children and a bad back, surgery number one on the back leds me to the pain clinic now don't get me wrong I'm really in pain at this point. I meet the Doc and he starts me on more Percs and Oxycontin I really like this and at this point my life has been pretty rocky I been in the hospital twice now for Drugs trying to get off of them but I left AMA both times I don't have a problem I think. Well my wife is pretty much ready to leave me, now I was getting Xanax from my family Doc and Soma if you never had those before don't try them there bad they will mess you up and along with the percs and oxy I'm pretty worthless cant hold down a job lost my job of 5 years at the still mill thangs are bad so I decide to make a change I find a Doc that does subs that willing to see me on a Saturday I fill pretty good about this so I get there tell him my story and he says I'm not on the right pain meds so he gives me Fentenol patches 100 mcg and still the percs for break through pain so thats not what I was expecting so were off to the races now thre is a Doc telling me I don't have a addiction problem and giving me huge supplies of the best stuff out there awsome for me not good for the people around me those that I know and the one I don't I was in 6 accidents in 2 weeks I even hit two simi in the same day on the same strech of road within half hour of eachother still dont think I have a problem and a week later I reck my wifes new car and go to jail lost my job and really close to losing my family. By this time I'm bad blacking out waking up alone and on the floor stuff broken all around me I'm in a deep depression I think that killing my self is the best way to go now before I take my family down with me but I can't becouse I grew up with out my Father and just can't do it to my kids but all this time I'm slowly killing my self with drugs and don't even know it and one day it hit me I don't want to do this any more its die or get help so my mother takes me to the Hospital the next morning my wife don't go she don't care any more she heard this before but this time was diffrent I was ready doing it for my self and not to please others I spent 10 days in detox got on Subs did another 2 monthes in IOP ans today it's now a year and 1 month still on Subs going to meeting and showing my wife and family that I can recover from this and life can and will get better I'm trying to get the back fixed its really bad but with the Subs and other ways I have learned through out my recovery and my meeting I am recovery life has not been this good in a long time people we can recover from this but only when we are ready to do so for us I think you for ready this its long and not real easy reading but I had to tell my story and thats the short version thanks and good luck to you all

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 5:04 pm 
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Thanks so much for sharing your story. You've been through so much (haven't we all?)! You should be proud of yourself for sticking it out for your kids. Kudos to you.

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 Post subject: thanks for sharing!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 11, 2010 11:52 am 
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wow that was very touching! i'm so happy for you, i know how subs can turn your life around, it's always so incredible to hear of others who are living the same!! i relate to your story because i come from a loooong line of addicts as well...it definitely sets you up for it in a way- anyway i wish u the best in your recovery!!

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