It is currently Fri Aug 18, 2017 11:58 pm



All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Our Sponsors





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 15 posts ] 
Author Message
PostPosted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 2:21 am 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
I'll try to keep this as short as possible. I've been taking some sort of opiate since about 2005. It started out as Tramadol because I heard I could easily and cheaply get it online for my lower back pain instead of paying doc fees, especially with no insurance. I did this up until I moved to Kentucky which is nearly impossible to get online. I found ways around it for a while, but in mid-2011, the tramadol all stopped. Ever so often, while taking the tramadol when I was still getting it, I'd get a hold of Oxy's, L-tabs and morphine pills for the obvious addict reasons. You can say I took opiates 35% for pain and the rest because it took away all the stress, depression and worries in my life. I tried to kick the tramadol because I was told it wasn't actually an opiate and wasn't addictive and that was utter B.S... I suffered for weeks with no sleep, RLS, insomnia, etc...

After weeks of misery, the addict mind took over and found ways to obtain other opies. I was taking anything i could get my hands on (L-tabs, Roxies, Morph's, methadone, Opana's,etc..ONLY pills, no "H")for months just to keep from the misery I went through during those 2 weeks with the tramadol kick. Sometimes I'd go 2-3 days with nothing, if I couldn't find anything and resort to Kratom, just to get by until something else popped up. I'd take 5-6 energy drinks a day and Xanax for only when the anxiety got bad because I had a job then. Well, in early 2012 I got a hold of Suboxone through a source and was told this was what was to be taken to get off opiates for good. I tried to do a 1 month taper and got down to like .5mg per day, and still didn't feel normal or 100%. I finally stopped because I had no choice, my source ran dry. I didn't feel too bad til about the 3 rd day when it hit me like a ton of bricks......because of the long half life, I've read. I suffered, yet again, for 3 weeks with barely any sleep, appetite, energy and severe anxiety. The insomnia is the worst part of it for me. The only advantage I had during this time was I was un-employed and could just lay around most of the day with super anxiety hating myself.

I found some book online called The Mood Cure by Julia Ross which gave vitamins, amino acids and nutrition advice to help with various wd sydromes.......mine opiate related. I suffered through and took it 1 day at a time and stayed clean for 2 freakin' months. Now, granted, I was on a HUGE cocktail of vitamins, herbs, amino acids(neurotransmitter support) and energy supps like pre-workout drinks you'd get at a bodybuilding store. With taking all this natural stuff I felt pretty normal. Well, at the 2.5 month mark I saw an old pill connection and decided and I was clean enough to try some percocet and that was last June 2012. I started back to buying pills once a week and then after 5 months was back to daily again.

I'm so disgusted with myself because now, I'm trapped again and have a good job. I have been able to get a hold of 10 strips of suboxone which I started last Tuesday and it takes me about 1/2(4mg) to get through the day feeling 90% normal. The only difference is THIS TIME I want to do a PROPER taper and find a suboxone doc or psychiatrist with an opiate dependance program. I can't afford to suffer like I did the 2 other times doing a retardedly quick taper and suffering for 3-4 weeks. I have to be able to function with my job, so I have no choice, but to turn to a doctor. My older brother is offering support and financial help since most places don't take insurance and my insurance hasn't kicked in yet. Any words of encouragement or advice is greatly needed now....thanks for listening.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 7:06 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 8:47 am
Posts: 937
Location: Southeastern US (Alabama)
Try finding a doctor, then first visit...ask if he has any patients that are on the Patient Assistance Program that Reckitt-Benck offers (they are the makers of Suboxone strips).

They'll give you 2/day for around 10 months free...but you need to meet certain qualifications, like being below the Fed poverty level (with isn't difficult to meet...most everyone making under $25,000/yr easily qualifies...

I did this when I had no insurance, and luckily was in with a doctor who just started up in my area...he got me into the program..but I've read now the program relies on the patient more than the doctor (since doctors can be kinda difficult to get to personally get involved...)..
I'd offer more advice, but not great on knowing the different ways for different states.

_________________
Adam Wayne P.
DOB: July 1, 1985
October 8, 2013

RIP little brother. Gone, but not forgotten.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 9:41 am 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster
User avatar

Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 4:30 pm
Posts: 48
Hello and welcome! Do you need help finding a dr who can get you in a sub program? If so, let us know. We can help!

_________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities. Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy =)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Top
 Profile  
 
Our Sponsors
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 10:09 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
Amy14921978, Amy, that would be of great assistance. :D

I did a quick search and several docs come up, but I was thinking of going to a psychiatrist here locally in Louisville that offer Opiate Dependance Treatment. Her name is Zoe D. Wilson, M.D. which if you search google and her name will bring up her website. I don't know how this forum is about posting links, so I'd rather not post her website. I've read too many people just going to docs and treated like crap basically, here's your prescription, be back next week, month etc.. for your next checkup and prescription. I want to get to the root of the the reason I think I need opiates to make me feel normal. Well, now I know why which is because I'm addicted. But, before I was even addicted, opiates took away all my emotional pain, stress and just made me forget about all my troubles......I know.....same ole story.

Back last year when I quit for 2 months, broke down to my mother, my older sister and older brother which were all supportive. I was doing so good and then thought I had it kicked and here I am a year later and back in the same hell hole I was in years before. God, why are we like this? Why can't we all just be happy without drugs? I think our society as gotten so stressful with trying to maintain a certain lifestyle, kids, mortgage, car payments, etc... that the stress is just too overwhelming and weak people LIKE MYSELF(POINTING THE FINGER RIGHT AT ME) don't have coping skills to avoid the easy way out......taking drugs/alcohol to forgot all the stress....TEMPORARILY. Am I right? I need a psychoanalysis bad and coping skills to deal with stress. The funny thing is my brother is a borderline alcoholic, which has really cut back and only drinks 1-2 times a week now instead of almost daily, my sister is obese because she uses food like a drug, I use pain pills, my uncle(dad's brother) was a cocaine addict for years and my aunt(dad's sister) was a meth addict for years. Both my uncle and aunt got clean, but my older brother, my older sister and myself and all just f'd up for some reason. Coming from a broken home with parents that hated one another probably contributed whereas my sis and I grew up with mom and stepdad and my brother grew up with my dad.

There has to be a link there why all my blood brother and sister are both addicts themselves in different ways. I was also molested at a young age by a neighborhood boy when I was probably 6. I can remember it like it was yesterday, but the weird thing is I'm not mad at him now and don't hold any resentment unless it's buried or repressed which is why I may need a psychoanalysis or psychiatrist with addiction specialties. What would you all think? Also, was diagnosed with dyslexia as a kid and struggled in school until my mother sent me to a special school for three years to overcome it, which I did. Graduated college with a 3.9 GPA. BUT, like the dyslexia I have researched Adult ADD and it's like, "hey, they are describing me to a "T"". I've read that ADD peeps tend to be drug addicts. I have no motivation and no focus whatsoever and need stimulants through the day to get my tasks done. My attention span is super short and I can't multitask worth crap. I also read that Adult ADD sufferers jump from job to job which I have done since I moved to Louisville in 2007. I just can't stay satisfied and easily get bored of stuff. Seriously, I'm one screwed up person with a crappy opiate addiction to boot

Goodness, I aim to write to paragraphs and end with a darn novel every freaking time. Anyone else want to shed some light or think they are similar to myself, I'm so interested to know if I'm just a messed up human being that will ever be able to find solid ground and live a normal life. I'm 36, haven't dated in years, I'm basically a recluse except an occasional outting with old collge friends, which is about the only time I drink alcohol. Alcohol and weed are just 2 intoxicants I never cared for. I used to LOVE ecstacy because I guess I lake serotonin, but am scared of taking SSRI's. Haven't had "X" in over 10 years though. I also indulged on and off with cocaine, but never started a habit due to a natural affinity to anxiety which strong stimulants exacerbate without anxylotics to counteract to anxiety. My affection always will be for opiates, but I know it's time I have to give it up because it's gonna cause me SO much more problems than I already have if I continues on the road I'm on.

My cousin commited suicide due to alcoholism which I'm not suicidal, but sometimes I do think if lightning would just strike me and end all the pain I'm in emotionally then I won't have to suffer anymore. I know there's help out there, but I just have to find the right doctor who's capable and willing to delve into my psychy and give me some answers about who I am and why am the way I am. And, most of all how to make me a better, more social person without any need for opiates. :(


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 10:22 pm 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster

Joined: Mon Jun 03, 2013 3:21 pm
Posts: 60
Location: Cincinnati
well, that is a common feeling. I think that if you admit that you are an addict, a good NA and or AA program would do wonders.. hell, IOP treatment is amazing in what it does for me. admitting that I needed help was a lot but when i ask for it i do receive... i always refer back to this H.O.W to stay clean (honesty. openness. willingness) I know a lot of people are oppesed to these meetings because they dont agree with the whole god thing but there is hope. I even know a few athiests that are in the program and its working for them. they say bring the body and the mind will follow. even if you dont decide to go that route there is plenty of ways to get help out there this i am sure of

_________________
my first day a guy asked me how i was doing, i said terriable bro, he said hang in there. I said well how do I do that, he said just let go....


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 11:08 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 11:48 pm
Posts: 1346
Location: oregon coast
hi there...

jonathan gave you some REALLY good advice, about finding a dr... then worry about the taper later.... I mean, really IF you ended up on a low dose of sub daily,, wouldn't that be a whole LOT BETTER than this merry-go-round>>>?????


I only say that, cuz I've been there... Only it will get worse... IF this "short term taper" doesn't work,,,, I'm not trying to "doom" you or anything here, either.. KNOW THAT k?
I just WISH someone would've or could've hit the fast forward button for me,, when I was at the POINT you are NOW,,, and show me,, five years later, using needles, and living in my car... a car that didn't even RUN....

anyways,
here's a couple links to find a dr....
I was luckily able to do the patient assistance thing jonathan brought up, for a year,, three strips/day... and it's the ONLY reason I was able to "stick with suboxone" to begin with.....

here's the links.. and GOOD LUCK

http://www.suboxone.com/patients/opioid ... octor.aspx


http://www.treatmentmatch.org/



[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zElJGMwpwt0[/youtube]

_________________
anyone can give up,
its the easiest thing in the world to do, but to
hold it together, when everyone would understand if you fell apart
That's TRUE STRENGTH
http://almostoneyearclean.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 4:31 am 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
amber4.14.11, thanks so much for the links. I'm looking at Suboxone strip website right now and the psychiatrist/doctor that I was thinking about calling is on the list of the 20 mile search based on my zip code.

I will admit that I have been able to get a hold of 10 suboxone films(8mg/2mg) this past weekend because I was 1.5 days into a morphine and hydrocodone wd. I have a good job and they thought I was sick, but little did they know my REAL issue. I will need some financial assistance because I'm still new at my job and it's a technician/installation type job where customer interatction, focus, troubleshooting, etc.. is part of my job. Nothing really physical, but I've had wd's before and the not sleeping and anxiety almost drove me nuts and I can't go through that working a full time job, so I'm gonna start calling doctors tomorrow to see what the costs are and when I can get in. Sundays and Mondays are my only day off and I don't have a set time I get off work either since it's an installation type career. I'm usually home around 5pm though.......sometimes earlier and sometimes later.

I came clean to my older brother and he said he would help financially or what I couldn't afford. I can HONESTLY say this with 100% CERTAINTY that the past year of my DAILY USE has not been to get high, it's been to JUST FEEL NORMAL. And, when I'd get around Tuesdays, when I'd always buy my weekly supply, I'd be so anxious and scared to death that something would happen where I couldn't get MY STUFF. God, I HAD SO much stress and anxiety starting on Sunday that I'd actually drink liquor alcohol to help calm me down and I don't even hardly drink alcohol except on rare social occasions. Opiates have always been MY THING. I'm SO Tired of the stress and anxiety of when, how, and where I'm getting my weekly supply which is all I could afford and my habit was usually around $300-$320 per week. God, the money I've wasted and the lies I've had to concoct with family to explain away where the money has gone is just mind boggling and the guilt I have is just overwhelming at times. I truely feel like a piece of whale poop laying on the ocean floor at times because of my addiction. But, I'm SO ready to be over this and get on suboxone and then eventually, at the right time, taper down under doc supervision and then quit for good while substituting exercise, good diet and hopefully some reconnection with my spiritual side that's been dormant for years.

Thanks again all for listening to my story. Hopefully, I can find the right doc or ANY DOC, starting out, here within the month and get on a suboxone maintenance plan and then just take it one day at a time. I actually feel some relief after visiting that Suboxone strip website and reading some of the stuff there. I scored a "6" on the opiate dependence questionaire which 6- recommends talking with a doctor about an opiate dependence problem. I'm scared to death cause I sorta fear doctors and finding which will be the best fit for me while also being within my budget since I don't have any insurance CURRENTLY. I missed my enrollment for health, dental, and vision back in April because I was too lazy and un-motivated to check my mail regularly, so now I won't have insurance until I can enroll again in October. Lke I said though, my older brother offered to help me on the costs, but he said he won't give me money directly, which I don't blame him one bit. He said he'd pay over the phone with credit card or arrange another payment plan. That suits me fine.

As long as I can get on a Suboxone maintenance program with regular visits and counseling around my work schedule then I can TRUELY say the weight of an elephant will be off my shoulders and I can stop worrying about getting sick from wd's when I can't find anything and I can also get some things off my chest which might be some of the reasoning behind my usage. I don't plan, nor WANT to stay of Suboxone forever. I want to do a very safe taper whether it takes 6 months or more.....under doc supervision. For once, I feel a bit of confidence I'm about to get finally get the help I need and become a normal, productive citizen again. I used to be social and go out and do stuff, but now I just sit at home and CONSTANTLY think about what I'm doing to myself and watch the clock to see when it's time to dose again. I hope, when I finally clean my act up, I can help some poor soul that is walking in the shoes I'm currently in. I truely hope I can someday get that opportunity.

Thanks so much again for all the support and advice from your replies to my thread! Please feel free to add anything at anytime. I have thick skin and an open mind, so if you want to say how "STUPID" I am for getting myself in my situation then I'll agree with you and if you want to offer any other great advice then I'm all eyes/ears. God bless each of ya!!!

A_Low_Man


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 11:28 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 11:48 pm
Posts: 1346
Location: oregon coast
A_Low_Man36 wrote:
amber4.14.11, thanks so much for the links. I'm looking at Suboxone strip website right now and the psychiatrist/doctor that I was thinking about calling is on the list of the 20 mile search based on my zip code.

your welcome

I will admit that I have been able to get a hold of 10 suboxone films(8mg/2mg) this past weekend because I was 1.5 days into a morphine and hydrocodone wd. I have a good job and they thought I was sick, but little did they know my REAL issue. I will need some financial assistance because I'm still new at my job and it's a technician/installation type job where customer interatction, focus, troubleshooting, etc.. is part of my job. Nothing really physical, but I've had wd's before and the not sleeping and anxiety almost drove me nuts and I can't go through that working a full time job, so I'm gonna start calling doctors tomorrow to see what the costs are and when I can get in. Sundays and Mondays are my only day off and I don't have a set time I get off work either since it's an installation type career. I'm usually home around 5pm though.......sometimes earlier and sometimes later.

when I started my 'new' job, and was in sub treatment, I just told my boss, UP-front I had to see the "therapist" every two weeks, and what day and/or time works best for YOU to do that?? his response--- thanks so much for taking that much thought into this!! tues/thurs are the best days, and either earliest appt possible, so you can just be a little late to work, or latest appt possible, so you can leave a bit early.
Just a suggestion.... you could say ANYTHING that you think would "work" as an excuse... are you married? say my wife is MAKING me go to marriage counseling..... or whatever good ideas YOU have....
OH, and I still have this job, by the way,,,, been there OVER two years now.. LONGEST employment for ME< ever!!.


I came clean to my older brother and he said he would help financially or what I couldn't afford. I can HONESTLY say this with 100% CERTAINTY that the past year of my DAILY USE has not been to get high, it's been to JUST FEEL NORMAL.

me too... about the last three years I was using... was ONLY to be "not dope sick" your not alone , there.


And, when I'd get around Tuesdays, when I'd always buy my weekly supply, I'd be so anxious and scared to death that something would happen where I couldn't get MY STUFF. God, I HAD SO much stress and anxiety starting on Sunday that I'd actually drink liquor alcohol to help calm me down and I don't even hardly drink alcohol except on rare social occasions. Opiates have always been MY THING. I'm SO Tired of the stress and anxiety of when, how, and where I'm getting my weekly supply which is all I could afford and my habit was usually around $300-$320 per week. God, the money I've wasted and the lies I've had to concoct with family to explain away where the money has gone is just mind boggling and the guilt I have is just overwhelming at times. I truely feel like a piece of whale poop laying on the ocean floor at times because of my addiction. But, I'm SO ready to be over this and get on suboxone and then eventually, at the right time, taper down under doc supervision and then quit for good while substituting exercise, good diet and hopefully some reconnection with my spiritual side that's been dormant for years.

This is also VERY COMMON.... I felt like I "lived" in my car..... then when It got "real bad" I DID LIVE IN THE CAR... but I mean before that,, ALL THE WAITING.... on this person, that person, the dr.'s office, the pharmacy,, the whole time wondering IF your gonna "get your stuff" or get ripped off, instead...... Yeah,, Not much of a life.... You'll be so amused by all the "spare time" you have, once on suboxone.. allthough, it's not an "easy" road, either... but LOTS LESS BULLSHIT/DRAMA... at least for me!!
And,,,
it does take a while to "repair" relationships,,, but the people I thought the LEAST likely to forgive me,,,, were the first in line to do so, once they SAW MY ACTIONS,,,, instead of just listening to my words...so don't get discouraged, when some folks don't "believe it til they see it" just SHOW THEM It's different this time..... and my grandma STILL won't give me cash, to this day,,, 26 months, on suboxone,, but I DO NOT BLAME HER... but just like you say,,,(in paragraph below), she will pay w/credit card over the phone and things like that.. or go to the pharmacy and pick up my meds......



Thanks again all for listening to my story. Hopefully, I can find the right doc or ANY DOC, starting out, here within the month and get on a suboxone maintenance plan and then just take it one day at a time. I actually feel some relief after visiting that Suboxone strip website and reading some of the stuff there. I scored a "6" on the opiate dependence questionaire which 6- recommends talking with a doctor about an opiate dependence problem. I'm scared to death cause I sorta fear doctors and finding which will be the best fit for me while also being within my budget since I don't have any insurance CURRENTLY. I missed my enrollment for health, dental, and vision back in April because I was too lazy and un-motivated to check my mail regularly, so now I won't have insurance until I can enroll again in October. Lke I said though, my older brother offered to help me on the costs, but he said he won't give me money directly, which I don't blame him one bit. He said he'd pay over the phone with credit card or arrange another payment plan. That suits me fine.

As long as I can get on a Suboxone maintenance program with regular visits and counseling around my work schedule then I can TRUELY say the weight of an elephant will be off my shoulders and I can stop worrying about getting sick from wd's when I can't find anything and I can also get some things off my chest which might be some of the reasoning behind my usage. I don't plan, nor WANT to stay of Suboxone forever. I want to do a very safe taper whether it takes 6 months or more.....under doc supervision. For once, I feel a bit of confidence I'm about to get finally get the help I need and become a normal, productive citizen again. I used to be social and go out and do stuff, but now I just sit at home and CONSTANTLY think about what I'm doing to myself and watch the clock to see when it's time to dose again. I hope, when I finally clean my act up, I can help some poor soul that is walking in the shoes I'm currently in. I truely hope I can someday get that opportunity.

Thanks so much again for all the support and advice from your replies to my thread! Please feel free to add anything at anytime. I have thick skin and an open mind, so if you want to say how "STUPID" I am for getting myself in my situation then I'll agree with you and if you want to offer any other great advice then I'm all eyes/ears. God bless each of ya!!!

A_Low_Man


Don't forget to ask about what jonathan mentioned to you,,, the "here to help" program,,,

where the manufacturer GIVES YOU FREE MEDS FOR 12 MONTHS!!!!

I was on this program, too.... and I would NOT have been able to start out on sub, without insurance, UNLESS I GOT ON IT... I was lucky enough, MY DOC HAND"T EVEN HEARD OF IT!!!!
so,
you never know, you could get lucky.... Keep the hope alive..... when you start calling dr's ask if they have ANYONE on the here to help program,, where RB pays for 90 strips of suboxone a month
each doctor can have UP TO THREE patients, on it.
okay?
and,,,,, that first year,, I was on the free med program, and I definitely did need three a day, but when I "lost it' after a year,,, I EASILY WENT TO ONE..
.
and ONE strip/day,,,, equals about $140 a MONTH with NO insurance, and NO coupon... (small price to pay!!)

the coupons don't work for me, has to be becuase of the "here to help" thing... they probably figure they've paid for
ENOUGH of MY meds......
LOL

anyway,, if you need any help,,, don't be afraid to ask!!!!!

good luck..... I hope you are able to get on the free meds program.... that REALLY allowed me to "get on my feet" not having to worry about where I'd get my subs from.....

hang in there

_________________
anyone can give up,
its the easiest thing in the world to do, but to
hold it together, when everyone would understand if you fell apart
That's TRUE STRENGTH
http://almostoneyearclean.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 6:57 am 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
Amber, I will try to ask for this, but I have a suspicion I won't qualify due to my income. At my job, I probably average sometimes around $15.00 to $20.00 per hour even though, I'm not paid hourly. I'm a technician and basically make my income based on the work I do..........installing home security systems for a well known worldwide security company. I'm 6 months into it and am still in the learning stage, so with my experience and training, I'll be making close to $30 hourly......with occasional spikes over $30 per hour. That will take a while though due to several factors including: lack of experience(being able to increase my speed), how busy we are, the types of jobs I get, etc... I truly suspect I'll have to pay for this out of pocket which is fine with me if it gets me closer to being INDEPENDENT of ANY opiate drug.

I truly think suboxone will be the ticket for me to get out from under the pull it has on me. I'm finding I don't really feel normal unless I take around 1 strip a day, BUT I have to make my short sub supply last me until I can find a doctor which I've STILL put off doing. Today, I HAVE to make some calls and just tell them my situation and that I need to get on an "opiate dependence maintenance with eventual tapering type program". From going to Suboxone(dot)com, I've found about 12 docs in my area. I'm so damn scared it's not even funny. I can't loose my job from the damn WD's. I honestly fear WD's more than anything I can think of right now. I've been through the 3 weeks of hell before, but, luckily, both times I was in between jobs and had to stop cold turkey due to lack of funds. Now, that I have a decent income, I can fund my habit, but I'm SO READY to quit and be done with all opiates for good.

I also have to get my diet right again since I don't eat very good(especially lately) due to the anxiety of not having enough subs until I can legally get them. I want to get back into MMA(Mixed Martial Arts) type training I did prior to 2005. I gotta get those natural endorphin peptides being produced again in my brain. I know it's a long slow process especially with the PAWS, but thankfully I never did extremely high doses of the opiates I did do..........just did them daily. I'm a fully funtional addict and you could never tell I had taken anything. I took what I took just to feel "normal" and funtion throughout each work day and then may splurge just a little on the weekends

If I didn't have my job I have now I'd just suffer and go cold turkey that way I could just lay around all day and suffer, but I just can't do that unless I'm absolutely forced to and even then I'd be going to a doc to get clonidine and some sort of tranquilizer help me sleep. Aside from getting on a sub maintenance and then taper program is to get some psychotherapy also(analyzation) as why I feel I need opiates in the first place. Hopefully, help is only a phone call away.

One BIG question I have I guess is this. Do most Suboxone docs give new patients a hard time or are they generally open arms with a "lets you get you on a sub maintenance program and then slowly teper you off, WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT...Also, let's get to the root of your mental pain you're trying to alleviate with pain meds. This is ALL I want!!!!


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 8:42 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 8:47 am
Posts: 937
Location: Southeastern US (Alabama)
I understand you're wanting to taper...but you're saying that in almost every other sentence, and you mentioned cold turkey if you didn't have this job...but reading back up a bit, cold turkey never did work and you never felt right, even after months of not having anything...
You need to just worry about getting into a program right now. Don't worry about the end of the program before you get to the beginning of the program, and even find the program...get your mind right, and have your thoughts right..You'd be surprised how much better you'll feel once you don't have to do the opiate dance and have a doctor that YOU KNOW will be there to give you a monthly supply. Things have changed a bit since I started, where the therapy stuff was a requirement with most programs a few years ago, now you can easily find a doctor who never mentions therapy and will give you your meds. This is what I'm in right now, because I have a hard time finding a program in this small town that I live in. The closest I can go for therapy is Bham, and that's an hour away...adding to my dr which is 1.5hr away...
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying no one needs therapy and such...but for me, I've been on Suboxone for quite a number of years. I'm all therapied out, so to say, because after a while, you just get told the same things over and over. There's nothing new they can add to the things they've already told you, and for about 2 years I paid the extra costs (gas, appointment fees, etc) and went to therapy...but, then I just got to a point where I had my mind right...and the medicine was the only part that was missing. I could keep myself away from the people, keep the triggers from tripping me up, use the coping skills I had gained on Suboxone, deal with emotions and anxiety like everyone else does...and I only needed to get my medicine to have that missing piece of the puzzle.

_________________
Adam Wayne P.
DOB: July 1, 1985
October 8, 2013

RIP little brother. Gone, but not forgotten.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 12:18 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 11:48 pm
Posts: 1346
Location: oregon coast
jonathanm1978 wrote:
cold turkey never did work and you never felt right, even after months of not having anything...

I'd like to share something here........ when I first went to my induction,,, and all that,, I think it was my Second appointment, I was kind of "bucking" the system/my dr.'s rules, and explaining to HIM, why I didn't NEED TO FOLLOW them,,,,
he said to me...
So,,, You have been in charge of your life, the last ten years, and you've been on the "Amber Plan",,, Now tell me
HOWS THAT WORKING OUT FOR YOU NOW????
hmmmmmmmmmm
It's not.
I shut-up and listened....... and NOW.... well now I'm so grateful I did...





You need to just worry about getting into a program right now.
Don't worry about the end of the program before you get to the beginning of the program, and even find the program.
get your mind right, and have your thoughts right..


This is the KEY.... Just get IN THE PROGRAM!!!!
Worry about the rest, later.
"we'll cross that bridge when we get there"




You'd be surprised how much better you'll feel once you don't have to do the opiate dance and have a doctor that YOU KNOW will be there to give you a monthly supply.

and you'd be surprised how GREAT it feels to have a "valid" prescription, and for it to ACTUALLY LAST you how long it's supposed to... to not have to HIDE your "meds" if a cop pulls behind you, or whatever... I'm fairly sure you know what I'm getting at , here......
it's SO NICE,,, to not be ashamed, embarrassed, to be LEGIT,,,,, FINALLY!!!! and not constantly FRET and WORRY "they" won't have anything, and YOUR GONNA BE SICK ALL WEEK.....
it's such a freaking RELIEF, man.......
.





Here's a link to the "federal poverty guidelines" for 2013
You can be a little over, but not much.....
I make about $15/hr and I was WAY UNDER,,,, but that was a family of 3
if you have a roommate or anything like that, you can count anyone in "your household"
they only "verify" paystubs/gov't income/whatever you SEND THEM to prove income.
they do NOT ask for anything, like birth certificates or whatever.....

http://aspe.hhs.gov/poverty/13poverty.cfm



I really hope this further inspires you to give it a GOOD TRY
GOOD LUCK
and let us know, if there's anything else we can help with :wink:

_________________
anyone can give up,
its the easiest thing in the world to do, but to
hold it together, when everyone would understand if you fell apart
That's TRUE STRENGTH
http://almostoneyearclean.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 5:34 am 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
I got a referral from a guy to one place and got the number. I called it last week and spoke with a lady telling her I needed to get help for opiate dependence. She explained the cost and avaialability of the doctor there. It's some psychiatry place because it had psychiatry in the name when I called. The ony problem is the doc is only available on Wednesdays from 12-3pm and that won't work with my job schedule unless I arrange something with my manager. I don't want to tell him WHY I'd need to see the doc in fear of loosing my job. Don't I have some confidentiality thing on my side where I don't have to explain "why" I need to see a particular doctor? Being uninsured right now, due to my own negligence when I started my current job(missed the enrollment deadline), the cost for the place doesn't seem that bad compared to what I've read others having to pay. Of course the cost doesn't include medication costs either. I did find a $50 copay savings card on Suboxone website that I could use also. I just downloaded the PDF file tonight. And, as I stated ealier, my older brother is going to provide me some financial assistance to get me the help I need, so that's some relief there.

I will also try to get the best deal I can using some of the information provided from some of your posts above. Regardless, I think I'll still be spending less money going to a Suboxone maintenance doctor than what I was paying while still using and obtaining my opaite pain pills illegally. I haven't taken any pain pills in almost 3 weeks now due to a friend getting me some Suboxone 8mg/2mg strips. I'm taking just enough to 'get me through the day' and to hopefully get through until I can find a doc. From the Suboxone website, I have a list of docs I'm calling tomorrow,since it's my day off, to see it I can find a doc to see on Mondays. My 2 days off during the week are Sunday and Monday, so I'd prefer to see a doc on my day off without having to disrupt my work schedule. I'm sure my boss wouldn't be happy having to let me only work a 1/2 day any other day through the week, just to meet my doc. Plus, I'd be loosing money from not working since I don't get paid hourly, I get paid "per job" and commission on additional products I may install on a job to job basis.

When I go see a doc, do I have to have some sort of opiod pain med in my system or should I just tell him that I obtained some Suboxone from a gernerous person, so I wouldn't be "dope sick" and be able to somewhat function through the day while having a full time demanding job? This is what I fear. I still have a few pills I've been saving just in case because I don't know if docs drug test or not. I have been taking a little Xanax when I need it for the anxiety, but I have a legit script for it eventhough it's a year old script with some left. Sleeping has been difficult due to the stress of it all and probably because my body hasn't adjusted to the Suboxone because I'm not taking near enough to "feel normal"......just enough to not be full blown "dope sick".


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 8:24 am 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster

Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2013 10:29 pm
Posts: 52
When I go see a doc, do I have to have some sort of opiod pain med in my system or should I just tell him that I obtained some Suboxone from a gernerous person, so I wouldn't be "dope sick" and be able to somewhat function through the day while having a full time demanding job?
Be up front with your past and current using history. Having sub in your system makes a difference in how the first few days will be managed, since you won't be in withdrawal, and need to be induced. good luck


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 9:21 am 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster

Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 1:31 am
Posts: 6
That's what I needed to hear....thanks! :)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Help is near.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 5:41 pm 
Offline
One Month or More
One Month or More
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 01, 2013 10:51 pm
Posts: 31
Location: http://lifeafteraddiction-suboxone.webs.com/
Good afternoon A_Low_Man36,
I feel your frustration believe me; I think it's safe to say 90% of the people here do too.
For me, Suboxone has saved my life. I am a third year psychology major (once a hardcore heroin junkie) studying to be a substance abuse therapist. After almost four years of being clean and free from chasing dope/pills I relapsed, and like the majority of opioid addicts that one time relapse turned into a full blown raging junkie all over again. My issue was college, my GPA slowly dropping, and being and feeling like a liar, studying to help others out of addiction, but failing to do so myself. I can safely say this, when it comes to most addicts relapsing is just a part of recovery. I would say 98% of true addicts relapse at least once before becoming clean for good. Also, for me, I need long-term maintenance and so, this suboxone is wonderful.
I have Tenn Care, or rather a form of Medicare; you know, for us poor people. :roll: My insurance does not pay for my monthly doctor visit ($125.00), but it does pay the suboxone. I am prescribed one and a half strips a day and I am Blessed to have a doctor who, just today, let me know it was basically up to me as to when I want to tapper down (if at all). However, due to being on it already for 6 months, medicare is going to start (next month/7th month) to only covering one a day. I'll have to pay for the rest.
Question.. where are you? My doctor is OH SO AWESOME and taking new people. You either have to have opioids in your system, or something like methadone/subutex/or suboxone. They do however need you to be going through withdrawals, because taking suboxone with other opioids in your system will make you real sick (been there done that).
Have a better day~~
Jennifer V.

_________________
Wow...thank God for Suboxone.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 15 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Our Sponsors
Suboxone Forum latest topics RSS feed Subscribe to the entire forum
cron
 

 

 
Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
  • Asst Clinical Professor, Medical College of Wisconsin

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group