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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 12:28 am 
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I am currently 36 weeks pregnant and have not told my Dr of my opiate use. I started out taking them around my fourth-fifth month of pregnancy for migraines that I get. I ended up becoming addicted. It was not my intention. At most, I take 20-30 mg a 3-4 times a week. My problem now is that I haven't told my OB and I don't have the funds to keep paying for it. I'm very worried about withdrawling while pregnant or my baby withdrawling after birth. I really want to tell my Dr because I don't want anything to happen to my baby. I'm aware that cps will get involved and I am beyond willing to do anything they want me to to keep my baby, but I also know that this is no ones fault, but my own. I did research a lot about percs before taking them and read that they do not cause birth defects, and only withdrawals if taken close to birth. At that time, I didn't see this being an issue. I am completely and totally ashamed of myself because I never even did drugs before I was pregnant, but I also never got migraines before I was pregnant. I want to try to be put on subs but I think it is too late and no Dr will prescribe to me because I've never been on them through a Dr and because I am so far along. I also don't know if I even have enough time to find try to find one if they even will. I have had connections to people who sell sub's but not anymore. When I took subs, i would only take 1 mg of a strip and it was enough to keep me from withdrawling. I really just want to do what is best for my baby and do what will keep him safe. I have read withdrawal can cause still birth and I don't know how I could ever live with myself if something like that were to happen. I don't know what to do. I wish I had not been so naive to the power of addiction. I am really here looking for advice and support, not to be bashed. I keep myself up all night, every night reading about the possibilities of what could happen between withdrawals and CPS and I already feel like the worst person in the world because he did not ask for this and its not fair to him at all. I was not trying to get pregnant, it was unplanned but I do still love my baby with all my heart. Thank you...


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 12:37 am 
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And yes, of course I want to quit using all together. I do not feel like it's too late for that at all. I want to kick this in the butt before it turns into years worth of a habit that I can't afford or ruins my life.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 1:17 am 
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You are safe here. You will not be bashed because you are pregnant, on opiates, and asking for help. If someone comes here and bashes you they will have to deal with me and I have magical powers! (Not really.) :)

First question I have to ask is are you going through withdrawal in between your doses of 20 or 30mg of oxycodone. Are you lately taking 30 mg 4 times a week? It's time to get specific. If you are not going through withdrawal symptoms in between dosing then your baby is not withdrawing. And by withdrawing, I'm not talking about craving your next high. I'm talking about sweats/chills, diarrhea, vomiting, major aches and pains (beside the migraines), etc. If you are not going through opiate withdrawals a doctor will not put you on buprenorphine (active ingredient of suboxone).

If the above is your situation, you need to stop taking oxy immediately and find someone to be accountable to. Someone you can call and talk to every single day and who will come over to your house to distract you. You have 4 weeks left. You can get through 4 weeks without oxy if you are accountable to someone who will kick your ass if you slip. After you have Mr. Baby we can go from there about getting you to stay in recovery.

If you are withdrawing to the point that your family members would think you had the flu, you need to find an OB who has experience with opiate addicts. You can be perfectly anonymous calling around to different OBs. If you're really paranoid you can buy a burner cell to call from. Also, start looking for a suboxone doctor. For you, the best kind of sub doctor (the understanding kind) will probably a doctor who also does family practice and accepts insurance. You need someone who can help guide you as well as put you on medication if warranted. You could also look for a methadone clinic and seek help. If you seek the help now and get on medication now (which will probably be easier to do at a methadone clinic at short notice) you may get questions from CPS, but they shouldn't be in danger of losing your baby.

Just to give you my best educated guess, I doubt your baby will be in danger of death unless your withdrawals are severe. My other educated guess is that withdrawals would be most likely to cause preterm labor at this point, as opposed to being super dangerous to baby. But if you're uncomfortable going through withdrawals, your baby is too.

We will give you as much help as we can. If docm or suboxdoc reply to you, listen to whatever they say. They are actual MDs, although they cannot give you very specific information unless you see them in person, which you can't.

If you need an accountability partner and don't have anyone you can trust, PM me. I will be your person for the next 4 weeks if necessary. Consider this an emergency situation that you need to address ASAP!

Amy

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 7:35 am 
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HI and welcome . I just wanted to say Amy is so right on everything she said. She is very knowledgeable as are many of us here on this forum. We will be here to help you all we can. Please listen to what she said and follow the things she suggested. I too want to offer to help back u up with support. I know how hard it is to be pregnant and addicted but you can do this. You can get this under control for you and your baby but need to take action now. Please feel free to PM me also if you want to. I will help you all I can. Go back through Amy''s response and answer her questions and follow her suggestions. Keep us updated on you progress.

Willow


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 9:16 am 
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Hey enembe welcome!

I cannot give u any better advice than what Amy and Willow already has but just wanted to offer my support. I didn't become addicted til after my children were born so I don't know what ur going through personally but I'm an addict and I know how difficult that is in itself. U can get control over this just don't give up!

If ur not using every single day then maybe it's possible that u won't have major withdrawal and that would be great. Cravings are another huge part though, but at least that's not physically gonna hurt ur baby. It'll stress u out mentally and can still be tough to handle. Cravings is a huge reason why I started suboxone.

Don't be so hard on urself, it's not like u purposely did this. Try not to focus so much on that and just accept it best u can and focus on the solution. Keep us updated.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 28, 2016 8:43 pm 
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Amy covered things well. Most docs who prescribe buprenorphine will be reluctant to push your tolerance higher, especially during pregnancy. So if you are being completely honest about taking opioids for only a few months, your best bet may be to take a shot at total abstinence.

The problem, of course, is that almost everyone addicted to opioids has TRIED total abstinence. You don't want to be 'bashed'-- but you need to change your thought process. Treatment is not just education. Staying abstinent will require you to change your perspective and perceptions. You will have to tolerate a large amount of misery, for one thing. You have been taking medication to ease your headaches... and you have probably gotten other 'benefits' from that medication. Going forward you will need to tolerate whatever pain you have. You will need to challenge that internal voice that says 'one more time won't matter'. That is a VERY difficult thing to do--- and most people cannot pull it off. But understand if you don't do that, you will need to take the next step-- which will likely involve a significant time commitment. You could try intensive outpatient, which means going to individual and group therapy that is about as intense as a fulltime job... and if that doesn't work, the next step would be a residential program for 6-8 weeks.

Spend some time here reading the stories of other people who got stuck on opioids. They are all good people. They all thought it would be OK to take opioids, and none of them planned to become dependent on them. Everyone 'knew' that they wouldn't have time for treatment. Every person addicted to opioids 'knows' that they don't NEED the treatment that OTHER people need. Everyone believes he or she is special, and that in his/her own case, a small tune-up is all that is needed. I certainly believed that myself, even when I was deeply connected to opioids.

I also strongly suggest that you take Amy up on her offer. Treatment is not just education-- but you need education, as well as treatment. And Amy will teach you more about opioid addiction than most doctors could. I am here now and then, and I'll try to chip in when I can too. You have a tough road ahead, but doing the right thing now will pay off in a huge way.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 29, 2016 6:38 pm 
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Enembe, are you still around? Have you gotten some kind of help or taken any of our advice?

This is not something you should put off dealing with. The more you abuse opiates, the worse withdrawals you have to go through and the more likely you will have to have a more extreme solution to the problem.

As Dr. Junig says, you don't want to be bashed and we don't want to bash you. But you might need more of a wake up call than what you've let sink in so far. You've identified a very real problem and you need to address it right away. Changing your thinking is necessary, but you won't know how to do that by yourself.

It's extremely unrealistic to think that you can get through these last 4 weeks of pregnancy on your own without support. If you don't have available support there are several of us here who would help you and be available by phone call, text, and email. All you need to do is ask and give us your information. I hope that if you aren't finding help here that you are finding help somewhere.

Please take your situation with deadly seriousness. I asked Dr. Junig to weigh in on your post and asked him to double check the information I gave you. He had a really busy day yesterday, but made time to write to you and give you advice. Please listen to what he said with your heart as well as your head. You're incredibly important! Both to your family who loves you and to your baby who absolutely depends on you!

Amy

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Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

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