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 Post subject: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 12:19 pm 
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Hi y'all! I'm new here and on my 3rd day of subutex. I didn't know I was an addict. I know that sounds strange, but all the medication (norco) was prescribed by doctors. Sure, I took WAYYY more than prescribed. Yes, I'd take my husband's prescription too. But I thought no way I could be an addict since I'm not buying it on the street or shooting up. Well I am. That's hard to admit. I decided I didn't want to spend my life high or always chasing a high. Amazingly, a doctor I was already seeing is a sub doctor. He's been so helpful and I'm so thankful. I'm 3 days on subutex (taking 16mg/day in divided doses for addiction/pain management) and I already feel like I'm getting my life back. The cravings are gone, I feel clear-headed, and I'm EXCITED about life! I'm also 28 years old and a stay-at-home momma to a 3 year old and a 19 month old. I'm so ready for this journey and so thankful for subutex for giving me the chance to get my life back. I just wanted to introduce myself since I've been reading here for the past 3 days!!


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 2:53 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 7:15 pm
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Hello MrsSpencer :) welcome.

Glad ur on this journey with us. I think a lot of ppl think differently at first when they're solely getting their medicine from a Dr. Even if u take more, at least ur getting it legally right? That's not how my journey was but I totally get what ur saying. In the end we're addicts nonetheless. We still are powerless over our opiates and need help and recovery. I'm glad u found subutex. It really is a miracle. To find something that eliminates cravings and lets us go bk to living life again is truly awesome.

Addicts come in all classes of ppl and we can all learn from each other and support each other. Ur kids have their mother bk and that's an amazing thing.

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Jennifer


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 2:56 pm 
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Welcome, and keep checking in. Yeah, my addiction hit me like that too; I was going to my GP for back pain, she gave me norcos and somas, and quickly evolved from there. That's the illusion out there sometimes that unless you're smoking crack, or jamming a needle somewhere, that you're going to be okay. Some call it white collar addiction (pills), since a lot of professionals end up addicted, I was a "functioning addict" for a good 4-5 years, maintaining a job, a family, mortgage, all while doc shopping, and buying off the street to keep up. I applaud your choice to get on subs, but I highly recommend some kind of therapy or counseling (individual or group- I did both), and you can check out 12-step programs or SMART recovery meetings if you want, just fair warning, some 12 steppers don't like us "subbies". Point is, a lot of addiction is mental and emotional, we use to cope, well now you need different coping skills, and ways to handle stress. So the medication will curb, (probably completely stop) your cravings, but I suggest speaking with someone, or getting info on recovery lifestyles.


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 9:59 pm 
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I'm med director at a methadone clinic that took in about 180 patients in the past 6 months-- in a relatively small town in the Midwest. I'd estimate that 75% of the patients started opioid with a prescription from a doc, after presenting with pain--- usually low back pain, but sometimes pain from surgery or other problems. Nobody expects to become addicted!! I took codeine for a cold, and just kept taking it to help me sleep-- and my use slowly increased. By the time I realized I was taking too much, I was unable to control my use. I think that most people addicted to opioids have a similar story.

The thing that really separates opioid dependence from other addictions is the high rate of relapse. Once people discover something that eases life's hard moments (or at least something that leaves the impression of having that power), it becomes very difficult to turn away from that substance. I've become an advocate of buprenorphine after working in other treatment programs, and witnessing too many people who thought they were free from opioids--- who then returned to opioids, and in many cases died from overdose. Buprenorphine allows for long-term control of opioid dependence, something that is an incredible gift for those who value it. Some people eventually decide that they could have done it all without buprenorphine, and see buprenorphine as a 'trap' or as a problem. Of course they can always go back to where they were before buprenorphine by simply taking opioids again... so I don't really understand the logic of that attitude. But of course, people have been 'looking gift horses in the mouth' for a long, long time!

Without knowing you at all, I'd recommend staying on buprenorphine for at least a couple years. Many studies have shown that one year is not long enough to prevent relapse. I recommend staying on it until you are at least 30 years old, in a stable relationship, with a stable job and financial picture, with stable housing.... and if all those things are present, MAYBE tapering off. Or just stay on the medication. There is very little downside to buprenorphine, especially when compared to the meds for other serious health conditions.

Good luck!


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 9:40 am 
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Thank you all!! The responses are so encouraging Yes, ive definitely been a "functional addict" for the past 5 years. I think too many people have an image in their head of what a "drug addict" looks like and it's generally not the stay-at-home mom who goes to church, volunteers at the local domestic violence shelter, and cooks supper every night. But unfortunately, we're not immune and I wish it was more acceptable (to society) to say that I have a problem. Thankfully, my husband and family is very supportive of me and I'm very grateful for that. I didn't mention in my introduction, but I am also seeing a counselor who specializes in addiction as well. She's been a great help already! I'm so glad to know that there's no long term problems with staying on subutex. My doctor has already told me that I will be on it for (most likely) a minimum of 2 years and possibly for life (due to the pain management aspect) which I'm more than fine with. I just don't want to go back to pills.


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 10:09 am 
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Welcome to the forum. Allot of amazing people here. I am probably the last person you would expect to be an addict. I am a regular mom & grandma with chronic pain. I took pain pills for 25 years when needed and threw out more than I took. I was 49 when I started taking them to "prevent pain" & soon needed more & more which my doctor was happy to prescribe I couldn't stop, was taking crazy amounts of oxy & realized I needed help. I am on bupe now & grateful to be more normal again.


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 11:05 pm 
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I think its great you posted so soon after reading for 3 days. I have found much help here and believe you will also. I am a quiet addict and an 'unexpected' addict as well. Sub saved me and I wish I had found sub sooner. Wishing you well in your recovery.


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 Post subject: Re: Unexpected Addict
PostPosted: Sun Jan 24, 2016 10:30 pm 
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Thank y'all so much for the encouragement! It's great to be able to talk (type) so openly about our experiences. I'm so inspired when I read the experiences of others and know that they're feeling the same things I am and dealing with the same things I am. I also wish I would have found subutex (soboxone too :)) sooner. I'm so thankful for for such an effective method. Now to help start taking the stigma. I'd like to help start a meeting for sub patients so I'm going to ask my amazing doc his thoughts. I know it sounds like I'm trying to accomplish a lot, but sub is amazing and I actually feel energy and motivation for the first time in years!!


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