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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 3:35 am 
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So i've been on subs for 1 month. I am dosed at 8mg per day and at first I though it was too much. I tried just taking 4 and that lasted about a week until I returned to work and felt that I needed the full 8. After about a week in at work after about 4 pm I would start to feel like shit. I wondered if maybe it was due to working in really high temperature and sweating alot? Could I be metabolizing it faster or something?

My doc specifically told me at induction that if I felt like I needed a higher dose to call him. So I called to inquire.

The nurse was a total bitch to me. I guess she immediately assumed that I was drug seeking. Then the doctor told her that he had prescribed me 12mg per day.. uhh no, I got 30 for 30 days. So anyways I had to call her back 3 days later after waiting around for her phone call that never came.

He gave me an extra 10 to get through the rest of the month but she made it clear that this was some kind of huge favor. When really, I just wanted to find out what was up. I'm new to the sub game.

So then comes the pharmacy..

I had to have the prescription transferred to where I live since my doc is about an hour drive. I called the pharmacy where my prescription was sent and they said " ya its right here on the desk, have your local pharmacy call us"

After setting it up with my local pharmacy, I get a call back explaining that I dont get refills.

Once again, treated like some kind of drug seeking bastard. I told them that I had already verified it.

My poor local pharmacist had to call all over hell to get the OK to fill the damn thing.

This whole thing sucks. The cherry on top is now my family knows about my entire opiate problem. From beginning to end. I made the mistake of telling one of them I thought I could trust .. I guess I was feeling good about myself for taking the step to get off the drug abuse cycle. They are giving me a hard time about it. Some of the comments i've received .. "you've been high around my kids for the last 6 months!" "my kids arent safe with you!" (that one hurt)

Wasnt a whole lot of support to begin with.. now there really isnt any. Gonna try and get off the sub maybe in a month or so. I just don't wanna go back to using again.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 4:39 am 
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Someone on here a while back said that their doctor advised them not to stop taking Sub because of negative reasons or pressures... it kinda resonated with me .... And for you, these reasons are about as negative as they come.

If I jumped off sub because of that kinda pressure... I can just imagine myself when the first craving comes along ... "Those fuckers made me jump off and I wasn't ready . It's their fault I'm going to do this ..." Runs off to dealers.

Or you could stay on it as long as you need, wait til you have built up a nice lil life with a nice girl and a nice place and a nice job and a bit of travel and your family's love and support ... a life so different to your addiction that Suboxone is just a lingering remnant from the past ... and getting off Sub will let you go around the world, give you a better sex life with your hot ass girlfriend, make you feel truly free and independent. Those are good reasons IMO.

As for family stuff. Try and keep your medication regime away from them. If their awareness of it is at a minimum, they will only see you doing well.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 6:34 am 
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Hello Ryan,
I wholeheartedly agree with everything that tearjerker said. I know from experience how horrible it feels to have a family member say "my kids aren't safe around you." My sister would not let my nephews around me for the longest time. Now, I am allowed around them and to play with them, but she would die before allowing me to be alone with them. It isn't the best case scenario but she is getting better a little at a time. If I were to stop taking suboxone right now, I would do exactly what tearjerker said would happen. I'd feel like crap for long enough, and want to numb those feelings. After all, I haven't even been on sub long enough to learn how to deal with these kinds of feelings without drugs. I wouldn't use because I wanted to screw up my life. I would use because I wasn't prepared for life yet.

Suboxone is a great tool to help keep the cravings away, allowing you to focus on repairing relationships, and rebuilding your life. One day, you may feel so great that you no longer wish to take suboxone. When that day comes, your "hot ass" girlfriend heehee will be there to support you, in your nice house, and you'll have built up enough vacation days at your great job, to take a week or two off to jump. Until then, try not to let other peoples negative attitudes affect intelligent decision making. You have got so much positive support available to you here on this forum. Use us as much as you need to feel better about who you are, and your treatment decisions while working on your recovery. We have your back.

As far as the pharmicist goes, some of them are power hungry, and ignorant. Just ignore them. The don't know you. You seem like a pretty terrific guy to me!

Have a great day!

_________________
"All great changes are preceded by chaos."
~Deepak Chopra


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 7:20 am 
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100% what TJ said. It worked for me - I was on Suboxone for a little over 3 years and been Suboxone for 5-6 weeks now. Get your life back and then look forward to being off all opiates. To each their own, but this is my experience and I don't regret it for a minute.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 2:12 pm 
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Thanks for the replys.

After carrying around the family stuff for a couple weeks I think the pharmacy thing just set me off. I'm sure I will go right back to oxy/hydro if I jumped off now. It wouldn't be the right thing to do .. just to please my family.

I'm just gonna keep moving forward.

Hot ass girlfriend.. hah, I had one of those once. For 8 years in fact. She nearly put me in my grave early.. bitch.

She caused me more suffering that the drug problem! haha

Today is a new day.

Ryan


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 18, 2012 1:26 am 
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Ryan,
Today is A new day. And you know what? Sometimes you have to put YOURself first. It's ok to do that.
As a matter of fact it's important we all do that. I am really lucky.....I have the most Kick Ass family around. They know we are not perfect.....look our parents all have done shit we don't know about....trust me, we would probably freak out....And I don't want to know.

Anyway, screw what everyone thinks. This is your life and you are a reflection of yourself. So if you act like it bothers your....it will show. But if it doesn't then it shows the girl up front at your dr. or the pharmacy that this guy is a solid person, not some druggy.

Just my two cents.
I think you are kicking ass no matter what. You recognized your problem and YOU are fixing it.

Good luck, brother!

Fred


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 12:53 am 
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Thank you Fred.


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