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PostPosted: Mon Oct 02, 2017 9:44 am 
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Thanks again everyone!

So I wanted to update yesterday which was my 5 month mark but unfortunately there was an emergency. My best friend's mother called me hysterically crying because my friend drove to Brooklyn (I live on the eastern end of Long Island) and told his mom he was on the Brooklyn Bridge and that he "wasn't coming home". He kept saying goodbye to her. He wasn't in a good frame of mind yesterday. We were extremely concerned. Around midnight, my friend's cousin, myself, and another friend of mine drove out to Brooklyn trying to find him or his car. We had a spare key fob to his car so as we drove around we were pressing the panic button hoping we would hear his car. After a few hours we had no luck. He was answering us when we texted him but he was being very short. He just kept saying "I'm fine" and "go home". I got home around 4:30 and had to wake up at 6 for work so I am incredibly tired as I'm typing this.

Unfortunately he hasn't returned yet and although he isn't answering anyone, we can at least see that he is still viewing our texts and messages. So, this update isn't as good as I wished it would be because I'm very anxious and worried today.

In terms of actual withdrawals, I am still doing great. I feel a little bit of improvement each week which is nice. Again, my only problem currently is this pinched nerve and vision problems. Other than that and my friend being MIA, I'm doing pretty damn good.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 02, 2017 10:51 am 
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Congrats for making it so far wiichongo and I'm glad to see u keep updating us.

So sorry to hear about ur friend having such a hard time. I really hope ur friend gets through whatever it is they're going through. I guess they just need some space but I'd never want to put that kind of fear in my mother or friends. Hopefully ur friend will get some help. U showed what a great friend u truly are!

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 26, 2017 8:22 am 
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Hey everyone, I meant to update much sooner but I've been busy and forgetful.

My friend turned out to be fine. It was a rough couple of days not knowing where he was or what his intentions were, but he's back and seems to be back to normal.

I've also been doing pretty good. I've had a couple minor days where I was a little depressed, but I've been good for the most part. I still haven't had any cravings for bupe, though I have had a few dreams about it recently.

Anyway, I think I'm in good hands still. I'll update at my 6 month mark!

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 26, 2017 10:47 am 
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Nice to hear ur doing good wiichomongo. Oh and dreaming about opiates was something that happened to me every time I'd quit. In rehab I was having them pretty frequently, also the months after rehab I had them. I remember waking up and depending on how the dream went, I'd be relieved or sometimes it would trigger me a little bit..... nothing I couldn't handle but it's not fun to be dreaming about something ur trying to live without. I remember sometimes dreaming about drugs that I didn't even have an addiction to, like crack and coke, it was weird. I'm sure someone out there can explain those dreams but I do believe they're normal for what ur going through and it happens to many of us when stopping.

Great job Wii!

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 01, 2017 10:06 am 
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Quick update everyone.

I have reached my 6 month mark. I truly can't believe it. I never thought I'd be able to endure this.
The time has also been flying by, it's insane.

My update is this: I'm doing great. Any issues that I do have going on with me have nothing to do with the sub withdrawals. I can assure you all that. The only thing that may be related to the withdrawals are my extremely rare depressed days. Those are far and inbetween though.

I'm excited that I'm feeling this good just in time for the holiday season.

I hope everyone is doing good.

Thanks for all the support!
I will update in a week or so.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 26, 2017 1:31 am 
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All great news!

Amy

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 8:02 am 
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Congrats mate. 6 months is a huge milestone. I hope you did something safe to celebrate and reward yourself. Maybe that money you've saved from not spending $ on Sub could be spent on a nice mountain bike or something so you can better enjoy being 100% clean off all opioids!

Regarding your detox, I'm personally not surprised you had it relatively easy, and the withdrawal severity was nothing compared to what you expected. Suboxone is a lot more unpredictable than full agonists when it comes to withdrawal. I've seen people jump off 1mg and have an excruciating experience, and relapse within days. They'd try again a few months later and the same thing would happen. Then third time around, they'd be incredibly scared but give it another try. And they'd claim that the withdrawal was NOTHING like the intensity of the other times, even though everything was done the same.

I disagree with Suboxdoc about the severity of buprenorphine withdrawal compared to agonists. I've come off Sub a number of times, and overall the symptoms for me are, on average, similar in intensity to heroin withdrawal off a moderate habit. The effects are comparable with perhaps even more marked dysphoria than heroin detox. What makes Sub detox for me worse than heroin is that it lasts twice as long owing to its longer half life. It's not the kind of detox where you can take a week off work and count on feeling fine by day 6-7. I'd only feel myself improving by day 10-12, and experience intermittent sneezing and goosebumps for many weeks after.

That being said, it's also more unpredictable. While in general the symptoms for me were comparable to heroin withdrawal, it was also varied from episode to episode. There were a couple of times I coasted down and had a relatively easy time. Other times it was ghastly. Generally I'm talking about jumping off higher doses like you. 6mg +.

There was also more dysphoria with buprenorphine detox.

I'd personally choose buprenorphine withdrawal over methadone withdrawal. But given the choice between buprenorphine and a moderate heroin habit (in my country heroin is much more expensive than the US so my habits might not have been that big in US terms), I'd choose heroin. At least then I'd know I'd be fine within a week.


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 03, 2017 1:41 pm 
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Hey everyone, sorry I haven't been too active. I've been busy.

Two days ago was my 7 month mark. I will try to post more often, but my updates will most likely be very brief as I am still just getting better and better.

The reason I'm even bothering to update is so people who read this thread still hear from me and don't think I relapsed. I've seen a ton of threads about people getting clean and then they stop posting and it is discouraging.

Hope everyone had a good thanksgiving and thank you all again for your support.

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So, is there a way where I can find peace while still numbing my pain?


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 04, 2017 3:19 pm 
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I think it's also important to keep updating periodically because of ppl who's wanting to taper off themselves and may be looking for inspiration that it is possible. If they see ppl like u and pelican and others who keep updating, it shows there is hope. I think so many ppl out there think once u stop buprenorphine treatment it's an automatic relapse or something and that's just not true. U can show them how far you've come :)

Happy 7 months!!

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