It is currently Sun Aug 20, 2017 9:26 pm



All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Our Sponsors





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Hi!
PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2012 11:37 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 31, 2012 10:58 pm
Posts: 5
Location: London
Hello, a newbie here. I'm a long term sub user (8 years, since 18th Bday- we have long term maintenance scripts here in the uk , with no ultimate cut-off date). the drug was a gift from God at first; I was shooting smack, among other opiates, heavily and the fact I could take a pill and not have to get sick, and even get clean painlessly was like a miracle to me...but I became dependent on the subs themselves + it wasn't long long before I was shooting those too (this was in the subutex days, before they added naloxone to the mix.) I've been off the needles for 3 years, since the changeover to suboxone and have stabilised myself, but the fact is they've got a massive hook in me, and the thought of detox gives me cold chills. I always couldn't face the rattle ; I've known people who could grit their teeth, riding it out like a really bad flu, but not me...a low pain tolerance, I suppose. Cutting to the chase, I got involved in recovery groups NA etc, but I didn't feel like I fit in, not being abstinent. That's my story-no place in my old using circles, and an unsure one in the Program, it's a disconnect.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 9:28 am 
Offline
Super Poster
Super Poster

Joined: Thu Jun 28, 2012 12:08 pm
Posts: 111
Welcome Billy!

Wow, 8 years seems like such a long time to me, but I don't hear of many people being on it in the US for more than a few years... I'm sure there's some out there, but around here I only hear of people being on for 3 or 4 max. I do know there's some people here on the forum who've been on for a number of years tho, so I'm sure you'll meet some people on here who've been on for a long period of time like you have. I think it's actually great that you can stay on it, if you're comfortable being on it that long and it's working well for you! My doc says the longest he will treat for is about 2 years, give or take a little, but if I'm not ready then I'm sure I can find another dr. relatively close by who will treat me longer...

I'm glad that you're finally stable on it and not abusing and shooting it up anymore! I guess there's a reason they started adding the naloxene....

I feel ya on the detox and quitting... I don't do well with withdrawl either. I don't know a whole lotta people who do, but I have a friend who used even more than I ever did when she was in active addiction, and she quit. Cold turkey, she just sucked it up and went thru all of it and actually just got her 3 year token about a month ago. I tried doing it several times, and I couldn't bear it. That's the main reason my husband enabled me so much over the years. He couldn't deal with me being sick, it would break his heart and he would always help me find and get more pills. When I first heard about suboxone, it sounded too good to be true. I started doing some research and I read all the horror stories, which scared me even more... I'm just thankful that I found this forum because if I hadn't, I probably wouldn't have made that call to the sub dr. I've gotten a lot of great information on here and talked to a lot of great people and now I'm not as scared as I was before, but quitting all together still scares me a little.

I don't know if you're actually wanting to stop the sub or if you plan to be on it even longer, but whatever your plans are, there's a lot of info on here and a lot of members who have tapered off and there's some on here who jumped off at high doses. I'm planning on a very, very slow taper myself...

Welcome though and stick around! I'm sure whatever you decide to do you'll get a lot of support here and hear stories from people who all did it differently and if you decide to stay on, even for life, I say if it's working for ya, it's better than shooting up and abusing pills. I did attend NA meetings 2 or 3 times a week, but I've slacked off a bit from that, and I use this forum as my main support group. I feel kind of like you when I'm in those rooms, like I'm not really clean and sober like the rest of the people who are there, and to me, that wasn't good for my recovery because I really do feel like I'm clean from drugs. It's only while I'm there that I don't. They like to preach total abstinence and I've never let anyone know at NA that I'm on a maintenance drug. I wish they had more support groups around in an NA or AA setting for people on maintenance. That would help me tremendously!

Good Luck to you, hope to see you around here more! ;)

_________________
Invis ~<3


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 11:53 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:39 am
Posts: 4028
Location: Sitting at my computer
Hey Billy,

Welcome to the forum!!

I hear ya with your not being comfortable in NA. Sitting there while folks in the room blabber on and on about complete abstinence would get under my skin too. Heck, when I was in NA, I was completely clean and off of Suboxone and those folks STILL got under my skin! LOL.

Invis said it real well, she basically said that being in that environment wasn't good for her recovery and that's the bottom line, we all have to do what's best for our recovery. Just because NA works well for one person doesn't mean it'll work well for you.

Like Invis, I also use this forum as part of my recvoery and my support group, there are several of us here who do that. We would love to have you stick around and join us, we won't hold it against you that you're from the UK. My daughter calls is Britland instead of Britain, one of these days we'll correct her and stop letting her make an ass of herself, but that day is not today!! :)

_________________
Be kind to yourself. Our character defects do NOT define who we are!


Top
 Profile  
 
Our Sponsors
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 1:23 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Hi Billy!

I was kind of in your shoes too and can relate. I was on methadone for 2 years and then suboxone for 6 years. I was still messing around a bit while on methadone but completely gave up everything after switching to sub. My last year of sub was spent tapering down slowly. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Really and truly. Initially when I'd cut my dose down a tad bit I'd feel like I was getting sick and my body would crave sub but I found that if I just rode it out a bit, the feeling would pass and I'd forget about it. Once I realized that those moments were fleeting, I was ok. I got down as low as I could go. Two days before I jumped I was at 1.5mg and then on my last day I took one dose of .5 and then nothing. I was scared and had feared jumping off sub to the point where it was debilitating but I didn't want to be a lifer and want to start a family.. yadda yadda. So I forced myself to buck up and get on with it. I had a great doctor who was supportive and understanding and was with me the whole way. He prescribed some meds to help with the detox ( a benzo & neurontin.) I have to say, the whole process was not fun in anyway but it wasn't as bad as I expected and knowing that, I would have done it years ago.

Just wanted to share my story because I know how scary it is to wake up every morning knowing that you've been on this substance for so long. It's really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel after a while. But it's there, promise.

Oh and I know what you mean about meetings. I refused to partake in them until I was off everything. Not because I didn't feel I deserved to be there, I knew what I had accomplished and was proud of my progress, but because it was a constant reminder that I was still tied to a substance.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 7:14 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 31, 2012 10:58 pm
Posts: 5
Location: London
Thanks everyone, its a relief to know there are others in my shoes. Yeah, NA...it's a great idea,and I love what it stands for, but I personally found that in practice it's a very uncompromising, black and white philosophy that just doesn't fit me. You hear great, almost fanatic praise for the program, but then when you experience the cliques and the gossip etc...well, as I said, it's not for everyone ( for any program devotees; I mean no offence by this). I just don't believe abstinence is the only option for a successful recovery. Let's face it, the relapse rates I've seen in just my small backwater alone going through rehab, detox and the fellowships are pretty damn high. Is anybody hearing any good alternatives to the program? CBT therapy is the buzzword in my corner of the world right now, but I don't know much about it. Anyway, sorry for the very late reply, I'm on some new sleep meds that are playing havoc with my sleeping routine.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:19 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:39 am
Posts: 4028
Location: Sitting at my computer
To tell you the truth, I got more out of NA's Basic Text than I did the meetings. The Basic Text has some pretty good principles, it's just that the people in the meetings twist and contort the Basic Text until it makes you barf. Have you read any of the Basic Text yet?

I haven't done CBT, but I've heard good things about it.

As far as I'm concerned, I don't think it's what type of recovery you do, I think doing ANY kind of recovery is good. For me, I took some things my addiction counselor taught me, I took some things the NA Basic Text taught me and I've also learned a LOT from being a member of this forum. I took all of that and kinda made my own recovery that works for ME.

Try not to get too hung up on one type of recovery or another. Do what works for you, I think that's where long term success is to be found.

I've seen too many people try NA and try NA, but they really don't buy into the principles, so obviously they fail. If you're going to do some kind of recovery, it would help you a lot if you bought into it....know what I mean?

_________________
Be kind to yourself. Our character defects do NOT define who we are!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Basic text
PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2012 6:54 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 31, 2012 10:58 pm
Posts: 5
Location: London
That's a good point, the basic text is a solid foundation for recovery- I've read some really relevant stuff in there, and the disease model of addiction seems to be pretty much accepted as the universal standard. But your also right in that recovery is a personal experience that's gonna be completely different for any two people, we are all unique after all, and for any person 5 years abstinent, attending yay meetings per week, there'll be another just as clear-headed on a stable suboxone script, doing just as well. So who's got the right idea? That's really the only thing that gives me reservations about the fellowships; the inflexible approach to this problem. Some stuff that's helped me a lot actually has nothing to do with recovery, I keep up my photography, I volunteer at a charity shop; it just puts things in perspective for: yes I have this problem, but it doesn't define me as a person, that's for sure. This forum seems unique in that it's possible to have a level headed discussion about this topic, unclouded by the whole dogma thing, so I'm very glad I found it.

_________________
This is how the world ends


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:36 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member

Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2011 9:45 pm
Posts: 833
hi billy-- and welcome to the forum". i have been on subs for all most 3 years and need to take one more look for i'm starting to for get :lol: i have a friend who is on subs for 8 1/2 years and i'm glad you came to the forum. the other day my friend said
just one thing to me "DON'T GO OFF IT and then he left. i'm in the same old boat as all of us here on the forum. i like to read
ROMEO/ LAddERTIPPER and hope i can do one of there ways of getting off suboxone but as much as i want to" i no i'm just not f'n ready. stay with us

_________________
Humor is one of the best qualities in life of intelligents breeze1.wmv utube untitled 26 (2) utube just me and my music


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: hi
PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:47 pm 
Offline
Average Poster
Average Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 31, 2012 10:58 pm
Posts: 5
Location: London
Hi JohnBoy- yeah, I've heard some horror stories. Once, when I lost my script, I got a replacement from my doc, only he gave me micrograms instead of milligrams...! I was very ill for two weeks and that's what made me vow I'd put off the rattle for as long as humanly possible. And now it's eight frigging years later...

_________________
This is how the world ends


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Our Sponsors
Suboxone Forum latest topics RSS feed Subscribe to the entire forum
 

 

 
Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
  • Asst Clinical Professor, Medical College of Wisconsin

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group