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 Post subject: The New Me > The Old Me
PostPosted: Mon May 20, 2013 3:08 pm 
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Needed somewhere to vent and I realized that it all coincided with the changes I've made over the last (almost) 10 months, starting with ending opiates/subs, etc.

I quit my job last week. I have been there for 7 years. Of course, 6 of those years were a blur, as percocets and vicodins and whatever else I could get my hands on ruled my world. No one at work noticed or knew, as by that time they had become my normalcy. And I, of course, became numb to it all.

I was (and still am), however, very good at my job. Always the first to help people, always the first one done, always the one farthest ahead of anyone else here.

So, a couple of weeks ago, I got accused of taking 2-3 hour breaks some days I am here when, in reality, I simply have some down time from time to time mainly because all of my work is done, and I'm so far ahead of everyone else that there is nothing else for me to do. Through some artificial productivity report behind the scenes, they 'proved' I wasn't doing my work and gave me a verbal warning.

Two days later, I got called in for the same thing by the same 'boss'. He stated that the day before, I still had gaps in my productivity. I told him the same thing, that because I am far ahead, I don't have anything new coming in. Now I was faced with a written, final warning that I'd be terminated if this happened again. His beef was that "I didn't take the initiative to seek out more work".

About a half-hour after that meeting, I put in my two-week notice and quit. I mean, how can I possibly work on eggshells like that, especially when it needlessly would happen every day? I gave them everything I had and then some, and then I get accused of not doing work? Their final straw was "We will develop a plan for you where you never have any down time".

So, essentially, instead of being rewarded for hard work and determination and getting the job done, I got reprimanded for not seeking out more. That's all they want - more, more more. For like $14/hour too. I've done shit on weekends voluntarily, helped get people in the abyss out of the abyss before they got fired and this is what I got.

My point is that I don't think I'd have had the guts nor the gumption to quit like that if I had still been addicted to narcotics or subs or whatever. For the first time in a long, long time, I didn't just let something or someone walk all over me mainly because I knew I would just take more pills and deal with it. I stood up for myself, something I've NEVER done in my life. Even my direct manager was impressed that I refused to take any more shit from these people.

This is what happens to us as we get clean, not only do we think clearly, but we also think with more resolve and more desire to better ourselves. This was a dead end job that was only going to get worse. And in the front and back of my mind, I knew it all along but refused to change it because I, myself, didn't change.

The old me would have taken more pills, thought I was in the wrong, not cared about it at all, and just took more shit and work from these people without any kind of compensation other than even more work.

So, yeah, that's one direct effect of no more pills. Now, all of a sudden, I'm confident that I made the right choice and that things will work out for the better for me now.

Thanks for listening and reading. Coming up on 10 months clean soon so I'll be by to update soon :)

CHARLIE

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When you're young, you get all worked up caring about what other people think of you. That's the great thing about getting older - you realize, FUCK IT! It's what you think of yourself.


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PostPosted: Mon May 20, 2013 3:47 pm 
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I'm so sorry to hear about how your job treated you. That is so messed up! They basically told you that if you would have worked slower the whole time you wouldn't have got any kind of warning. My husband is going through something similar at his job right now. He is doing twice as much work as most of his co-workers because they work so damn slow. He runs laps around them, and they are getting paid the same as he is. So all he is asking his boss is to be paid more since he is doing more work. He has yet to see a raise and is currently looking for another job. It's so bad all these companies are putting profits before people. When my husband and I owned our business we paid every one of our employees very well, and if te business did well they each got bonuses. Which encouraged them to put in 100% effort. However if you are making the same amount as someone doing half the work and no matter what you do nothing's gonna change why make the effort? What they should have done for you was given you a raise and then told you since you were such a great employee and were so good at your job then they would be giving you extra responsibilities. However extra responsibilities (read as work) should always come with extra pay!


Good luck to you on finding a job that is worthy of your talent and hard work. You deserve it!

Squeaky

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"always be at war with your vices, and at peace with your neighbors."


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PostPosted: Tue May 21, 2013 10:35 am 
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I hear ya seaonasdad, ive been there with previous jobs and the one im at now. I work in the fast-food industry right now, i needed a job so I just went to the first place i knew i would pretty much be hired on the spot. Ive had "good jobs" in the past, but lost them due to my addiction. So now im at a job which im way over qualified for. We tend to hire alot of high school kids who stand around and do nothing when we dont have customers. In our downtime were supposed to stock and clean get done whatever nees to be done before the next rush, but the "kids" just usually stand around and talk or goof off
Im somewhat understanding of this because most of the time its their first job ever so they havent learned the ropes yet, but what pisses me off is the people who actually work steady and get shit done, dont get paid accordingly. Most of us get paid a little bit more, but its not enough. I make a dollar more per hour than the people who just stand around. It really frusturates me because fast food is a multi billion dollar industry, so you would think you could at least get paid good for being a dedicated, hard worker, But no, they give EVERYONE a shitty wage, and because of that ive developed this attitude thats like "whatever" and i really dont try to go above and beyond anymore. It dosent get me anywhere, so now i give them EXACTLY what they pay for. I feel like all the hard work i have done has gone unnoticed and unappreciated, so i dont even try anymore. Before i was an addict i never took shit from any job, but i also didnt have rent to pay beck then. So now im just dealing with it until i can get a better job. Im trying to go back to school so i can get a degree and have better job opertunities in the future. Good luck to you though, i hope you find a better job soon!


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PostPosted: Tue May 21, 2013 3:11 pm 
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Hey seasonasdad,

I'm glad you're at peace with your decision. Some working environments have a tendency to really wear us down after a while. Change can be a good thing! I hope you find something new that you can take pride in and supervisors that appreciate you more for your efforts.

Good luck and keep us posted!


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