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PostPosted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 7:01 pm 
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30 days ago, I took my last couple of Percocets that I had accidentally left in a not so sealed bag in the pocket of my now-washed pants. It was totally a big green gob of powder by then. 5 15mg Percocets that I had bought on Friday, July 27 to start the weaning process down from anywhere from 60-120mg a day. I intended to eat 1 pill each for 3 days and then half the next 4 days. But, of course, by Sunday night, I was down to around 2.5 tablets of powder.

I told my neighbor Mike about my plan. He had been in rehab 2 years ago and naturally was pretty disbelieving of me that Friday night since I had already procrastinated trying to quit to him for the past 3 months. Mike was insistent that I could do it if he could do it, but he wanted me to do it his way, which I trusted because it was the way they did it in rehabilitation.

'Wean off for a few days then start Suboxone'. I heard that in my head since he moved in last March and we got to know each other. I flat out told him I smoked weed and he told me everything about himself from that moment on. Same story as everyone - a few turned into every other day turned the next fix of Oxy or whatever he could find narc becoming routine.

So that Sunday night, I went to sit outside on my step having already decided that there was no way I'd make it through since I was already badly withdrawn by then. I felt positively horrible so I tried to land some Percs successfully. Which is easy if you're an addict. Someone always has them for you. Set up to meet around an hour from that time, around 10pm that night. Went on my step to have a smoke and Mike is coming home, walking up facing me. He sees me, comes over, and immediately says "Oh My God, you're doing it aren't you?' 'You're trying to quit!'

Mike was my only outlet for Suboxone at the time, having safely been off the program for 1.5 years and I had read some bad things about it. Of course, none of my ope people sold anti-opes because then they would be without a job, obviously. And I didn't really trust a doctor because they are making a buck on this, so they will keep me on it as long as possible with me unsure if they have my best interests in mind.

So, he makes a call for me to his cousin, who is strung out on pretty much everything and he offered to help me out. Mike's cousin was unsuccessful with Subs, the choice to remain a downer appeals to him more, so he had around 6 8mg's left that he would give me for some weed. I wasn't sure if it would be enough for me, but I'd heard so many people say that it worked and saved their own lives, that I figured it wouldn't hurt.

Mike guided me through it like he was guided through in the program. He started me at 4mg/day in the morning for the first 4 days, right before breakfast, since that was when I took my percs in the morning. Over the next 3 days, I did the same thing every morning. 4mg only. After the 4th day, a day that I was really feeling absolutely crushed tired assumingly from both the ope withdrawal and the stacks of Subs I took, I decided to take a day off from the Subs also, just to see how I would be.

That day was a great day. I had no urge for opes and I still felt like I had done Subs all day even though I had none. Sooo, the weaning process begun again. Only this time it was for Subs, and over the next 11 days, I ate 4mg every other day for 2 days, then I skipped two days and ate another 4mg. On Saturday, we left for the beach for the week, and I had 1 tablet left. Mike advised me to break them down into 4 2mg pieces and eat them as needed down the shore.

Of course, it's the shore, and the beach, and amusements, and I was with my kid and my wife's family. Those 4 2mg's were eaten every morning over 4 days as soon as I woke up basically. That Tuesday, August 14 was the last 2mg Suboxone I have eaten. I have tried to find them since then, thinking I needed them and I actually liked that they made me feel better overall. But, now that I'm this far along and really haven't felt all THAT bad in the last 72 hours or so, I think I'm getting near that other side of reality. And quickly.

I'm not really sure why I put this on this forum. Maybe it's a way to say that you can do it and do it quickly. The mental aspect of this is the hardest thing to overcome. But, by putting your thoughts down and thinking about how you got to where you are today, you really self-heal yourself. And the withdrawal you may feel turns into some kind of learning experience every time.

30 days no opes, 13 days no Subs. And I've smiled lately. A LOT! Can you? YES!


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2012 9:50 pm 
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Joined: Thu Dec 08, 2011 2:41 pm
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Wow, it's like the stars aligned/God set up to send you a new neighbor that knew just what you needed! Mike sounds like a cool guy. I like how you said "putting your thoughts down and thinking about how you got to where you are today". I'm going to save that sentence and read it every morning. Thanks for sharing your story. It is such good motivation to hear success stories. Without this forum, I would not have such motivation. People on the street are not success stories. I am glad you took out the time to tell us your experience.

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