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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 7:45 pm 
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I've been on suboxone coming up on a year in September. Doctor had me@8mg then switched to 12mg. My insurance stops covering the med in September and I refuse to pay the ridiculous price for it. I've been tapering since June and am starting at 4mg now. I figure I have 2 more appointments left and I'll use what I get from those to continue to taper down before I jump with. I've been attending aa and working steps to put some relapse prevention steps in place.
I'm just ready to not be dependent on this crap any longer. Especially since I'm in college, working, and a mother of a 10 year old daughter on my own, I don't want to spend the little money I make on Suboxone. I'm confident I can do this. I've been educating myself as much as possible and understand I'm going to have some withdrawls but what's a few weeks of withdrawls compared to the rest of my life. I figure here I can document my journey and maybe even receive some support. I look forward to not having to worry about not making it to my next appointment which I have to drive 2 hours each way to...


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 7:55 pm 
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Welcome subconscious! Thanks for sharing- sounds like you have the right mindset! "Realistic" and ready to do what you need to do to be "free". I also have a 10 year old (and a 12 year old). Our kids deserve a "clear" mom, right? And we deserve to be healthy for "us" too!!! I saw you posted on Trainers thread too :D Yes, she is an inspiration! She has certainly helped me! I'm 18 days sub free today after an 8 year habit, 12 mgs daily.
You can do this- if you are in college, and only a year habit, I am imagining you have youth on your side as well?
Keep posting, and good luck with your taper and jump!!
BF

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 8:01 pm 
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If you can find an Ecotherapy group or center in your area, I encourage you to check them out as well. I have been doing ecotherapy (healing thru nature), for a couple years now and its awesome!!!!! Ya, I'm weird like that. Ya know, the tree hugger type. Hahaha


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 8:03 pm 
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Welcome!

You will receive plenty of support here! There are a number of folks documenting their tapering or detox process here. You are in good company!

We have all kinds on the forum. There are people who expect to be on sub for life, people who are trying to get off sub, and just about everything in between. :) It's OK if you have complaints about sub here as long as you aren't bashing the people who choose sub as their treatment, or saying ridiculous falsehoods about sub.

A couple of questions. How much is your doctor prescribing you right now? Is there any way you can ask to get the 2 mg films instead of the 8 mg? It's easier to taper to small amounts if you're cutting a 2 mg strip. Is your insurance company just dropping your coverage of the suboxone films? My stupid insurance company has also stopped covering the suboxone film. However, they are covering a different buprenorphine medication called Zubsolv instead. From the sound of it you are determined to taper off whether your insurance covers a similar medication or not.

You are doing the exact right things in preparation of going off sub. Ramping up your recovery tools for when you go off sub is crucially important.

Keep us updated on your progress and good luck!

Amy

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 8:20 pm 
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Just one small thing I took from you post. I could never "save" my suboxone to ween down at a later time. Whatever dose my doctor gave me I took it. I ran into a similar situation where my insurance was not going to cover it anymore and my doctor started giving me 8mg again so I could stock up for my taper. All this resulted in for me was me taking 6-8mg a day instead of the 4mg I was at before talking to him.

This may not be the case for you and if it isn't its a good strategy, but its something to consider. I ended up paying cash for my suboxone for the last 6 months while i tapered down to 2mg and finally jumped a couple weeks ago!

Good luck.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 8:36 pm 
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Thank you all sooo much for such quick responses! You all just made my day! Especially feeling alone as I've felt lately. My doctor says she thinks I should be on Suboxone for life because if not I'm expected to relapse... I doubt she'd give me less to taper with. I've kind of just started to taper without telling her. I've managed to taper down to 4mg from 12mg thus far while saving the rest for the remainder of my taper. I get what your saying about taking what the gave you though, I did for the first 8 almost 9 months.

I don't knock people that are lifers on Suboxone, I just choose not to be one of them. Since I'm on state insurance and it strictly won't cover addiction medication after a year i just can't afford paying for it while working for minimum wage while attending college and raising a child... I need to start living my life free from the chains of addiction... I really appreciate the support! Living alone with my daughter, my mom living hours away and hating the fact that I'm on Suboxone, I can't really talk to her about it (mother is a drug/alcohol counselor! ) irony I know... lol

I'm trying to do anything/everything I can to start again. I fear withdrawls since I work daily 5am- noon then college after until 8pm on Tuesdays&Thursday's. I do algebra online (it's killing me too! I suck at math! )
I'm thankful I found this site though! I'll definitely try an find a eco friendly group trainer! I'd definitely like to check something like that out!


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 8:49 pm 
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subconcious wrote:
Thank you all sooo much for such quick responses! You all just made my day! Especially feeling alone as I've felt lately. My doctor says she thinks I should be on Suboxone for life because if not I'm expected to relapse... I doubt she'd give me less to taper with. I've kind of just started to taper without telling her. I've managed to taper down to 4mg from 12mg thus far while saving the rest for the remainder of my taper. I get what your saying about taking what the gave you though, I did for the first 8 almost 9 months.

I don't knock people that are lifers on Suboxone, I just choose not to be one of them. Since I'm on state insurance and it strictly won't cover addiction medication after a year i just can't afford paying for it while working for minimum wage while attending college and raising a child... I need to start living my life free from the chains of addiction... I really appreciate the support! Living alone with my daughter, my mom living hours away and hating the fact that I'm on Suboxone, I can't really talk to her about it (mother is a drug/alcohol counselor! ) irony I know... lol

I'm trying to do anything/everything I can to start again. I fear withdrawls since I work daily 5am- noon then college after until 8pm on Tuesdays&Thursday's. I do algebra online (it's killing me too! I suck at math! )
I'm thankful I found this site though! I'll definitely try an find a eco friendly group trainer! I'd definitely like to check something like that out!



I would also look into setting a date for yourself to quit. Sometime when your schedule is slightly lighter then it is now. For myself I would not have been able to work the first week when i was in full withdrawal, but others like Trainer14 were able to, so its not impossible.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 9:05 pm 
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I honestly thought I was going to be stuck on subs forever because I feared withdrawals from it so much. I had it in my mind that life would never be the same and I would be sick for months. I can sit here today and say that's not the case. Truthfully, the first 2.5 or so weeks sucked but I dug deep inside, found inner strength and pushed through it. That old saying is very true "We never know how strong we are until strong is our only option".

If you are determined, nothing is beyond our reach. What's 2.5 weeks of feeling shitty out of the rest of our lives. I have an old journal from my using days that I read alot. It shows me where I never want to be again. I FEAR those dark days. It was no way to live. Broke, dope sick and desperate is a shitty lifestyle and one I will never miss!

Best thing I ever did was wake up one day and scream "ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT, I AM OUTTA HERE".
Keep looking ahead and keep your eye on the prize. Even though detox from subs is different for everyone, you can definitely get a sense of what is in store by reading JI, BF, Mama and a few other folk's threads!!!

best of all, you have us! Even though we have never met, we are all supportive of each other!

Awesome sauce!!!!!


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 13, 2014 10:55 pm 
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Your very strong minded. Thats very important, because it takes a strong mind to stay sober. I cant say that many people here arent strong minded. You'll start to find out around 3 or 4 weeks off, that life isnt so grey But there's alot of temptation everywhere.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 14, 2014 3:56 pm 
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I really appreciate your imput! Trainer I've read your whole thread yesterday and thought to myself, I too want to be strong like her! Thank you mojito man, I'd like to consider myself strong minded, I've been through some rough shit , and fought (literally) to get back on my feet. Heck I'm still fighting.

I considered being a "lifer"on Suboxone at one point but I started reading about it ceasing to work for people after certain amounts of time on it. Just like all opiates and that scared me. I have went over a year clean before and started dabbling again then BAM back at it full swing... once I started using h intra nasially I knew I had to do something and Suboxone I heard was a miracle for opiate addicts... never researched it enough to know I was trading one addiction for another.

So here I am.... in the process of tapering. Hasn't seemed too bad. Though I'm not down to what people call the hard part yet which seems to be below 2mg. I've been letting my fear get to me and been putting off tapering for awhile now. It seems my fear of stuff is worse than the actual drops at times...

I'm definitely thankful I've found this site though where there's cool people that have overcome such a obstacle as Suboxone. It's no easy feat! You all deserve an award and definitely a t shirt trainer! Lol ;)


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:37 pm 
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Hi everyone just wanted to let y'all know I'm still here and still devoted to getting off Suboxone. I'm down to 4mg from 8mg and going to listen to my body on reductions... the end of this month marks my last Suboxone doctor appointment as my insurance runs out and I refuse to pay cash for the stuff. I've got a decent stock of the stuff I'll continue tapering with. I'll keep checking in and documenting my journey to be done with these subs. Thank you for any words of wisdom you may have. I've spent a lot of time reading around the board, reading successes and set backs. I have faith I can do this!


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