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 Post subject: Moderator Warning
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 12:50 pm 
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Semperfiguy,

You are starting to argue with people who have already made their decision on treating their addiction. That is against forum rules:


This forum is for people who have made their choice whether it be for Suboxone, for Methadone, or for meetings and no medication. While I recognize that some readers are not yet at the end of that choosing process, I ask that they read the information and make their decision without encouraging debate on the forum.
PLEASE Do not get into debating which is better-- such debates never change minds, and often introduce false information that clouds intelligent decision-making.
Show the respect for the decisions of others and avoid personal attacks.


Most of what you are saying is based on your experience and your opinions, not on scientific fact. Other people have different experiences than you and different opinions. While it's fine to state your opinion (which you've done excessively all over the forum), it's not OK to argue with a member who has made up their mind.

If you continue to aggressively argue your opinions, you may be banned in the future. I would much rather see you end the argumentative behavior and stick around longer.

Amy

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PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 12:58 pm 
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I ain't arguing with anybody.....and I ain't doing anything wrong... ....horse girl asked me a question in her response to my post and I responded.......you guys are the ones arguing and I don't care...thanks


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PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 1:02 pm 
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Your double negatives are working out well.

Amy

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PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 1:05 pm 
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Lol the woman has not even responded to anything I said, I am in no way arguing with her I have ONLY stated my opinions your having a problem with my opinions it's plain and simple....any sort of debate is 100 % on you and i aint gunna return the ball so go ahead and ban me if your not ok with my opinions...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 4:27 pm 
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So. It's bad to feel good or to post about how great you feel?

We should all encourage those that feel best on suboxone instead of telling them they are too medicated.

Like the doc says... Three options of an opiate addict....

Take suboxone and work towards recovery.

Go to meetings and fully immerse yourself in the program /step work/spiritual principles.

Keep using and die.

That's it. That's what happens more often than not.

So yes. In an ideal world I would be without suboxone and live a life of unicorns and rainbows...
But I screwed that up long ago and have ACCEPTED that I have to work at staying clean, from ALL drugs, or I'll die.

Whoever says this is propaganda or blasphemy is either in denial or just ill informed.

I want addicts to stay clean, not die, and lead a highly functioning happy life. And still have fun doing it.

So. We can argue the little details of why this and why that, but what it comes down to is this...

Opiate addicts come here to find support /education on suboxone. We should be pumped that they made the choice to stop using/active addiction and get on suboxone to try and get better/live normally. Not blast them and what not. I know it's hard for those of you that don't like or don't feel well on suboxone anymore or ever, but this stuff is saving lives and giving opiate addicts real hope and life back. This is the first time ever that hope is offered and feeling normal quickly is almost promised.

I accept that people have varying opinions. What I don't accept is folks that try to talk people out or off of suboxone treatment. Even saying "I'm not telling you not to take it, but..." is scaring them right off the bat. Let them feel good and happy without guilt
. Hold back your bitter thoughts to yourself in these instances. I know YOU feel shitty but let others have a chance. I'll


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 5:05 pm 
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I don't feel shitty...........If you think it's good to be in a state where you feel so happy you wanna shout it out to the world but your life is in shambles that's not good....it's not gunna serve you well......


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 5:21 pm 
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I didn't say that.

You shouldn't be crazy happy if your life is in shambles. But. You don't have to cry over it either.

Also. Your life may be in shambles, but you can't say either way about anyone else. You don't know if it's on shambles or not. And. What might seem like horrible living to you, might be excellent to others.

Or we could just tell everyone to be sad all the time.

Why not be the happiest you can? You don't know if it's suboxone induced false happiness. Maybe they are just happy for once.

Just accept that people can be happy on suboxone, live full lives on suboxone, have great experiences on suboxone, and are just satisfied with where they are.

Misery loves company. Doesn't mean we have to give it any.


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PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 6:45 pm 
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Semperfiguy I just want to thank you for reminding me that yes it is a drug induced sense of well being.I am 6 weeks inat 24 mg daily.


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PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 7:34 pm 
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Your welcom thanks for the encouragement.,...


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 Post subject: What the.....?
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 8:20 pm 
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Wow! What the hell happened here? I'm completely confused.

I in no way feel "too good" at all! I just feel NORMAL. Which for me, who has been severely depressed for many years (only felt good during chemo on Oxy) well, perhaps this could be mis construed as "too good". I am on ONE MG a day and that jitteriness went away long ago. As a matter of fact, as of now, I have NO side effects whatsoever. I drink a large fiber drink every day which completely takes care of any constipation problems. The jitteriness I felt in the beginning, which did NOT feel like a "high" at all ( more like I had an extra cup of coffee) went away weeks ago, and now that my dose is down from 2mg to 1mg my morning achy thing is gone.

As a matter of fact I don't even have to take my dose when I wake up! For me, this is remarkable. When I was on Oxycodone I needed a full half hours time after i took my morning dose before I had to get up to even get out of bed. Now I'm able to get out of bed, make coffee, take the dogs out or whatever and dose an hour or more later.

I rarely get angry on these forums but semperfi guy you're way out of line here. Somehow you've completely not gotten the picture here.

Before Suboxone I was suicidal. I have a 14 year old daughter and she is the reason I'm still here. Now, on Subs I am ENJOYING my life for the first time in years. I rode my horse today and had a great time. I wasn't just going through the motions. I FEEL JOY. I also FEEL SADNESS. I'm by no means artificially happy all the time. I still hate doing the laundry and housework. When my daughter is upset i cry. Now I respond to situations the way one should. I have normal emotions.

I tried living completely clean for eight entire months and it was horrible. My cancer was in remission. I should have been happy. I wasn't. As I've stated before I was the HAPPIEST I'VE BEEN IN TEN YEARS during chemotherapy because I was on Oxycodone. Before cancer I was a terribly depressed person. Because of this two of my Drs agree that I may truly have an endorphin deficiency problem.

Also ive been on numerous anti-depressants over the past ten years and none have worked. I had some TERRIBLE side effects and withdrawals from these drugs that didn't even help me. What's the difference if I use Suboxone? ESP if it WORKS!

I'm a 53 year old woman who has had cancer twice in the past three years. Why would anyone want me, just for the sake of being "clean" live an unhappy miserable life? Yes maybe people should be able to live without drugs. That would be awesome! But alas it's not in the cards for me. And let's face it, I have a pretty good chance of getting cancer again. Why not be happy now?

I will no longer listen to the naysayers. Maybe, just maybe you're heart is in the right place but it's not coming off that way. I've made my decision and I'm happy with it. I decided to post here just in case there's another person out there suffering as I was. Going on Suboxone was not a decision I took lightly by any means. But I am so glad I did it.

Thank you to Romeo and the others who posted and stuck up for me! I really really appreciate your support.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 9:17 pm 
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My only concern is for my future your future any suboxone patients future..... just the future.....,, I am sorry if I upset you but I am scared for you and that's why I expressed my feelings......


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 9:21 pm 
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I would also like to tell you that I felt exactly the way you describe feeling on subs when I first started using them. Again I am sorry your upset, in the end it's all about what you want to do :D


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu May 09, 2013 12:19 am 
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Good lord.

Scared because she feels happy and free from active addiction?

Sounds good.

I'll let it go now. You just want everyone to be as miserable as you are on this stuff. Sorry it didn't work for you the way you wanted, but that doesn't mean she or anyone else will get your same experience.


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 Post subject: Nothing new to add....!
PostPosted: Wed May 15, 2013 6:15 pm 
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Hi, just checking in.

A few days ago I was feeling ....I dunno..a little off, so I took 2mgs that morning. Got a teeny bit jittery but nothing else. Next day I took 2 mgs again and didn't feel that well that evening ...kinda nauseous? so I'm back down to 1mg. I think I read somewhere that for many people 1.26 mgs is the perfect amount! How they get there I've no idea but I bet that's the case with me. For now I'm just going to stick to the 1mg and maybe once in a while take a 1-1/2 if I feel the need.

But all in all 1mg really keeps things smooth with no side effects at all.

It's so weird to feel normal! Isnt that sad? Haha...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:00 am 
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hey G, been awhile, sooooo how are you feeling these days?
Hopefully you have found the right dose for your needs an wellbeing.
I have been reading over many many older postings from older threads
and it has shot me to your thread.
Yours is such a positive story im glad to have revisited.
And wow id forgotten how this thread was highjacked by subhater.
Oh well..
Hope your doing ok and life is good...razor55...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:22 am 
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Ggeo do you think it's possible that you're starting to become tolerant to the Mu-agonist effects of Suboxone? Sub is still quite a potent mu-agonist, and I have suspicions that for many people the mu-agonist buzz that comes with starting on Suboxone may be behind a lot of its anti-depressant effects.

There's been talk about a new buprenorphine-based anti-depressant that combines bupe with the strong mu-antagonist drug Samidorphan. The combination of the two drugs effectively eradicates bupe's mu-agonist effect, thus leaving only its kappa-antagonist effect. Apparently this works to reduce, or eliminate, bupe's abuse / dependence forming potential. Google ALKS-5461. There's some studies on it at the moment.

I know for me, buprenorphine has little positive effect on my bipolar depression. I'm still as prone to periods of depression on Sub as when I've been completely abstinent. The only real medication of benefit for my depression is Lithium - the tried and true. Conventional anti-depressants (SSRI / SNRI / TCA's) come with too much risk of mania for me unfortunately, so my doctor and I steer clear of them these days.

I'm just saying for those that may be lurking and interested in Suboxone as an anti-depressant ... it may not be the answer. Whether it'll work depends largely on the underlying cause of your depression.


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 Post subject: Still doing great!
PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 1:48 am 
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Hi everyone, just another boring update. I'm feeling' fine. Normal. Good. Yesterday I got up and my daughter and I gave my horse along overdue bath, including conditioner and all. And it was fun! We had fun together and I felt a sense of .... Oh I don't know....satisfaction? Pride? That I'd gotten out there and done something that was long overdue. My poor horsie. She loved the attention from both of us.
I even bought her a new fly sheet and a new fly mask so now she's stylin'! I know to normal people this act was no big deal but for me it was immense. The purchasing of the fly stuff, the shampoo, the conditioner and then setting up the two hours it takes to do this. This is what normal people do without over thinking it or avoiding it. Both things I was doing before Suboxone.

My daughter needs a new horse and we're broke so this is a challenge. Before Suboxone? No way. Couldn't handle it. Head under the blankets. Now I'm out there checking out horses to lease and really workin it to find her something esp since school is out.

So far no real side effects. Just a little achy in the morning - nothing like the rigidity I had with Oxy! And honestly it just could be my age. I'm not in the best of shape that's for sure.

So anyway there it is. I don't know how long it's been? 3 months? Right now I take 1mg one day then two the next. Never gone over two. Don't need to!

I feel good. My life feels normal. Does it bug me that I have to take Sub to have this life? Yes. But really not so much. I rarely think about it anymore. Hence how long it's taken me to post!

Thanks for everyone's comments and concerns. If you've PMd me and I haven't gotten back yet I apologize. I will go check now. Good luck to everyone and if anyone has any questions about my personal situation I'd be more than happy to talk.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 8:36 am 
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welcome to a happy life G..

Ya great to hear your doing well..was womderin..
This spring has been good here too.Good luck with
the horse thing....me, i was never to crazy to ride one,well once..ha
Ok so yur stable on a low dose..and normal?!!..good for you G..happy for you..

Gota say ..ya suboxone!! were in the middle on a run of taper/jumpers here.god bless them but
it sounds and reads tuff... So good to see and read a stabel sub story..
Anyway great to read your doing well and check back rain or shine...


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 09, 2013 11:54 am 
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Hi G, I'm new to the forum and have read (almost) all your posts. Thanks for your input. I'm in a similar position as you were before you went on suboxone. I used for 2 years but have been clean for over 3. I too have suffered from depression my whole life and the only thing that helped was when I was on painkillers for an injury. That led to an addiction. Fortunately I'm clean now but again I suffer from severe depression. I've tried everything from Wellbutrin to cymbalta, even SNRIs and everything was a bust. Horrible side effects and minimal help. I have gained over 50 pounds since I started on the fade in-fade out antidepressant medications. Awful. I just want to feel better. But I don't want to have to pay 300 hundred dollars to see an addiction specialist since I'm not using! I just want to try to use the RX for my recalcitrant depression. I hope someone who reads this can give me some advice. Thanks again for starting this thread, Ggeo.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 28, 2013 1:54 pm 
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Hey everyone, I just thought I'd give a quick update. I meant to go back to the beginning of this entire post to see when I began my Suboxone for endorphin deficient depression but I forgot, so I'm not quite sure how long I've been on it. (I'm thinking 5 months)

Anyway, no matter. Things are great!! I am STILL ON ONLY ONE MG A DAY, which I find amazing. I break my 2 mg pills in half and take a half every morning. Being an opiate abuser I find this lack of having to use more and more so incredibly odd! Why do we develop a tolerance for Oxy but not Suboxone? Regardless, I'm incredibly happy about it. I'm a normal albeit boring person now. (I also quit drinking entirely) Anyway, my life has taken such a remarkable turn since Subs. I've lost weight ad am so much more active. I just DO MORE STUFF period. My yard looks great! We moved to a new less expensive barn where we have to do all the work ourselves and it was a HUGE deal for us to move from a full care facility where our horses were taken care of by someone else. Just the move itself was something I could NEVER have handled before Suboxone! It took a lot of physical (and mental) work and I actually enjoyed it knowing I'm going to save $1000 a month once we are set up!!

I still have rough periods where I cry or am upset when I SHOULD ( recently lost $2000 on a horse and we are NOT rich). And I was EXTREMELY upset over it for a few days but moved on. If I were still on Oxycodone I would have turned away from the situation and stuffed all those feelings down with more pills. If i was like i was those 8 months completely free of all medication and depressed I would have not handled the situation whatsover and stayed in bed for weeks. This time I dealt with the owner and veterinarian, felt sad but moved on after a few days. After all, it's only money. It comes it goes.

I did however, go through a about a month of a side effect about a month and a half ago where I found myself overwhelmingly tired every day beginning at around 3 in the afternoon. I finally decided I couldn't stand it any more so I went to my GP and he prescribed me Amantadine. Good lord I was a basket case on that stuff after three days!! I felt terrible! So I quit taking it and decided just to hang in there with the tiredness (I know now that just taking the other half of the sub then would have taken care of that sleepy side effect but I want to stay on 1mg). Anyway for some reason that side effect just went away on its own. My Dr told me that if the Amantadine did not work he had something else for me to try and through googling my guess is Provigil. So glad that afternoon tiredness went away and I don't have to take anything else. I put this paragraph in for anyone else who might have this side effect after a few months on a low dose of Suboxone.

Guess I'll wrap this boring update up. Things are good. I feel like a normal person now. Everyone remarks on the change. I hope my story can help someone else who finds themselves in my situation. I feel Suboxone saved my life.

Thanks for listening.


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