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PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2014 4:32 pm 
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I live on the boost plus, it works its 360 cals and its a no brainer. this may suck for a week or so but push it if you can. you can do this.


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PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2014 10:04 pm 
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Heya Karen, glad you checked in!

Yeah, don't let a little slip throw you off your overall game plan. It happens. I meant to stop on the 1st of the month and wasn't able to start getting consecutive days until May 7th, now I'm wrapping up day 9. I still have three full 8mg strips I put in an out-of-the-way place in case something earth shattering came up and I had to be fully functional. But 3? Overkill. I think its time to be rid of all of them.

We can be 30 dayers!


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PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2014 10:13 pm 
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PS,

If your appetite is going south sometimes, def check out the Boost meal replacement, nutritional drinks, as me and DB have suggested. Boost Plus is best. Just about every grocery or pharmacy carries it. "Ensure" brand would work too, but I personally think Boost tastes better. Gatorade is good to have on hand too if you feel dehydrated from GI issues, sweats or the clonidine dry mouth.


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PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 9:42 am 
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Boop and DB, THANK YOU for your encouragement and I am going to buy the boost plus today.

I will get right back on the horse. I agree with both of you, just push through. Some how I got it in my head to just get "some relief" and that is the mistake.

I want to be like both of you where I can get beyond the insanity of always wanting the easy way out.


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PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 1:22 pm 
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You're welcome, Karen (for the encouragement).


Karen123 wrote:
just push through.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJQwnAhXnBk :D


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PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 2:39 pm 
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What an apt song no boop shoop doop de doop!! I may listen to this each morning I wake up!! :-)


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PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 5:24 pm 
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You can always go get some pedialyte, it a total hydration packed with all the electrolytes you need in one bottle. Dot buy the brand name get the generic, I like the grape, chug the bottle as fast as you can. I started a few morning off with it and it works well. it will keep you from getting dehydrated I had only 1 day I drank 2 and that was when I got shit face and did it too myself. just a comfort med I found over the counter. you should only need 2-4 of them at most if at all, just might be nice to have.


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PostPosted: Thu May 22, 2014 8:03 pm 
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how are you doing..


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PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2014 4:51 pm 
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Hi DB, I just logged in to post and see your post. Sorry I didnt see this earlier.

I have been going to AA/NA meetings. I finally shared about this but unfortunately I have not been able to make it beyond a day without taking some sub.

I have had days where I literally went all day and most of the night, then got up around 1:30am and took .25 - fell back to sleep, woke up feeling better only to find myself going through the weakness and blah's all over again around 1p or so.

Sometimes I get more of a day then others. Now, what I am doing is splitting the dose up and today I actually took .5. I took .25 around 12:30p (I just couldnt face the day listless and depressed). then I just took another .25 just now to get my ass out of my house and go to a meeting.

This sucks greatly as I feel you and Boop are probably out of the woods. I actually stopped reading as I thought that would depress me seeing you two get so ahead . Why I can't seem to get through the blah's.

I see myself getting better on the days I stretch but whether its like today and crash early in day or make it most of day and evening I can't seem to wrap my head around staying the course 24hours. I was able to do this in the very beginning..got almost 48 hours but that was when I was taking the T3's.

Maybe I dont want this enough??? I lost my job in april and not used to being in a quiet house with noone calling and no network to log into. I am trying to keep myself busy. I walk /hike every day, bath, try to make it to a meeting, call people, READ the Bible, pray, pray, pray which has helped but I find myself now at .5.

Maybe I should level at this, taper down . I just dont want this to go too long. Im trying to look for a job too so much of the afternoon Im on my computer. But I still find myself with too much on my mind to just distract for long.

I am grateful I have not had the cold sweats, headache and some days were so doable I just miss the energy and would have this heavy depression.

UGH.

I am 53 (just turned 53) so am I just too old???


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PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2014 4:58 pm 
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Also, to be brutally honest, I have been thinking.."what is wrong with just taking .5 for awhile"? It is lower than I was before and maybe its not the worst thing to happen being on that low dose indefinitly.

But then I think, - what if I move? what if my doctor quits or drops me? what if I run out? what if I have to go through that 8 days of hell again (I know I probably will but remember I was coming off a bad throat infection too and couldnt eat for days) - im hoping if I taper down and keep eating and not get sick it may be somewhat better?

I also am trying to get a job, do I want to be on this with a brand new job? But that is when I sometimes think (yes) as some of the days I couldnt get my body to feel good enough to do anything and my mind was like thick fog. I actually feel at times I heard ringing in my ears. I dont want to start a new job like that.

I think I am dealing with not believing I can feel better? when has it ever lasted this long- the days seem to run together even at taking a low dose I keep thinking I will get some progress for all the hours I "white knuckled" it before I took the dose. I forced myself a few times to make it till evening with nothing only to take it eventually. Some mornings I felt I was done with it..wasnt enough to barely put a dent in my pain so when I awoke the next morning I felt hope. But then it comes again...eventually REMINDING me I just put that dam poison in my body all over again to have to deal with .

Even people at the meetings keep telling me - give it a couple weeks or give it 30 days- that seems to motivate you guys and them too but it doesnt motivate me?????


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PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2014 7:26 pm 
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Karen123 wrote:
Also, to be brutally honest, I have been thinking.."what is wrong with just taking .5 for awhile"? It is lower than I was before and maybe its not the worst thing to happen being on that low dose indefinitly.

But then I think, - what if I move? what if my doctor quits or drops me? what if I run out? what if I have to go through that 8 days of hell again (I know I probably will but remember I was coming off a bad throat infection too and couldnt eat for days) - im hoping if I taper down and keep eating and not get sick it may be somewhat better?

I also am trying to get a job, do I want to be on this with a brand new job? But that is when I sometimes think (yes) as some of the days I couldnt get my body to feel good enough to do anything and my mind was like thick fog. I actually feel at times I heard ringing in my ears. I dont want to start a new job like that.

I think I am dealing with not believing I can feel better? when has it ever lasted this long- the days seem to run together even at taking a low dose I keep thinking I will get some progress for all the hours I "white knuckled" it before I took the dose. I forced myself a few times to make it till evening with nothing only to take it eventually. Some mornings I felt I was done with it..wasnt enough to barely put a dent in my pain so when I awoke the next morning I felt hope. But then it comes again...eventually REMINDING me I just put that dam poison in my body all over again to have to deal with .

Even people at the meetings keep telling me - give it a couple weeks or give it 30 days- that seems to motivate you guys and them too but it doesnt motivate me?????

Karen what worked for me the best was the liquid taper. that stuff sucks but once you stabilize on .5mg you should feel a bit better. you are getting down to low does where you feel every drop. do what you said take your time plan you drops and days around the half-life of the drug, ie sick for 2-5day, maybe6-7, everyone is different, but you will fell better if you stabilize. hope this helps keep posting.


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PostPosted: Wed May 28, 2014 8:34 am 
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DB, can you help me understand how to do the liquid taper? I am not that great with math but I was able to obtain a micro syringe. I read along time ago that with the micro (goes below 1mg), I could essentially dissolve a 2mg tablet (or 8mg) in 2mg water or 8mg of water (equal to the amount of the tablet) and then each "notch" is equal to whatever dose you are at?

That sounds more management then figuring say 12mg water to 8mg pill - I get confused what is what with that.

I tried the liquid a couple years ago. Tried dissolving the 2mg subutex pill at the time, and I felt NOTHING. I was on 1mg at the time and was taking .5 in morning and .5 in day. Im below that now.

But when I tried the .5 in morning and went back to bed: a couple things:
1) the water would not dissolve under tounge and I felt I swallowed most of it.
2) felt barely anything (scared me that I really didnt take enough). Ended up going back to get more.
3) I was also confused that I may have measured wrong as even on the micro syringe that goes below 1mg has a couple confusing notches on it so wasnt "exactly" sure which one I go by.

I have the strips now. So can cut them and using the sub cutting guide to be sure.

Note: I posted after I tried this water method a couple years back (not sure if it was this forum or another one) and someone wrote in and told me that the liquid is a certain % weaker so they suggested that I go up alittle to find my stabelized dose then work down? No where did I read before I started that it was "weaker" Diary of Quitter posted it gave him a buzz almost it was so strong.

When I took it, it actually did feel that I was just taking a drop of dirty water.

I dont mean to complain as I have read it works for others. I may try it again, Im first going to try to get down low on the tabs (I have tabs now). I do have an old bottle of 8mg sub that I never took as I made my doctor re presribe the 2mg after. I never used that bottle and still have it.


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PostPosted: Wed May 28, 2014 10:36 am 
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Hi Karen....Just read thru this whole post. I can hear how desperately you want off the Subs...I can so relate because I too get so anxious thinking about the "what ifs"....what if I need surgery? What if I'm in an accident? What if I break a leg? It just wears me out and I want off Suboxone so badly so I don't have these lousy "what ifs" anymore!

You did so well staying off the Subs for a week....I may have missed it but have you considered skipping days now? .5 every other day....then on to .5 every 2 days, 3 days, etc....?

You remind me of a lady that was on here a few years ago that had gotten so low on Subs and just could not seem to make the jump even after being at something like .125 for months.....but I think she finally did!

Hope you are feeling better...I have had one of those severe throat infections about 15 years ago and you are right....could not swallow, talk....could barely breathe....the pain was awful. Wishing you the best of luck at finding your way in this and coming on down and OFF for good :)

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PostPosted: Wed May 28, 2014 4:49 pm 
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Karen123 wrote:
DB, can you help me understand how to do the liquid taper? I am not that great with math but I was able to obtain a micro syringe. I read along time ago that with the micro (goes below 1mg), I could essentially dissolve a 2mg tablet (or 8mg) in 2mg water or 8mg of water (equal to the amount of the tablet) and then each "notch" is equal to whatever dose you are at?

That sounds more management then figuring say 12mg water to 8mg pill - I get confused what is what with that.

I tried the liquid a couple years ago. Tried dissolving the 2mg subutex pill at the time, and I felt NOTHING. I was on 1mg at the time and was taking .5 in morning and .5 in day. Im below that now.

But when I tried the .5 in morning and went back to bed: a couple things:
1) the water would not dissolve under tounge and I felt I swallowed most of it.
2) felt barely anything (scared me that I really didnt take enough). Ended up going back to get more.
3) I was also confused that I may have measured wrong as even on the micro syringe that goes below 1mg has a couple confusing notches on it so wasnt "exactly" sure which one I go by.

I have the strips now. So can cut them and using the sub cutting guide to be sure.

Note: I posted after I tried this water method a couple years back (not sure if it was this forum or another one) and someone wrote in and told me that the liquid is a certain % weaker so they suggested that I go up alittle to find my stabelized dose then work down? No where did I read before I started that it was "weaker" Diary of Quitter posted it gave him a buzz almost it was so strong.

When I took it, it actually did feel that I was just taking a drop of dirty water.

I dont mean to complain as I have read it works for others. I may try it again, Im first going to try to get down low on the tabs (I have tabs now). I do have an old bottle of 8mg sub that I never took as I made my doctor re presribe the 2mg after. I never used that bottle and still have it.
It sounds like you are getting your dose accurately, I would not change. sorry I thought you had the pills which for me, they were so hard to cut hence why I went with the liquid.


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PostPosted: Thu May 29, 2014 1:22 pm 
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dirtyblonde wrote:
It sounds like you are getting your dose accurately, I would not change. sorry I thought you had the pills which for me, they were so hard to cut hence why I went with the liquid.



I was cutting 8mg strips into 1mg with an exacto knife. Then I'd cut some of the 1 mg into 0.5 mg halves. I'd set 1.5 mg in a spoon, dip a thin straw into water, put my finger on top, then drip 2-3 drops onto the sub. Then let it sit for 5 minutes, stir it with a toothpick, and sniff with wider straw. Finally, I'd lay down with head back to avoid drain for 15-20 minutes. Because of higher bioavailability using sub nasally, I rounded my dose up to 2 mg if used under the tongue. The main benefit of using it nasally was cost effectiveness, since I was paying $7 cash per strip, although it's discouraged as "using behavior", but to me, its all about intent (cost cutting in my case) Its a myth that the naloxone can cause problems using it nasally, and it seems the bupe has a higher affinity for opiate receptors than the naloxone. Rumor is, they just put the naloxone in to scare people from injecting

Quote:
These studies show the strength of buprenorphine/naloxone in displacing opiates, but do not show the effectiveness of naloxone displacing buprenorphine and causing withdrawal. The Suboxone formulation still has potential to produce an opioid agonist "high" if injected by non-dependent persons, which may provide some explanation to street reports indicating that the naloxone is an insufficient deterrent to injection of suboxone.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buprenorphine


This doesn't really have much to do with Karen's taper, was just reminded of it. I don't know if it would be a good idea for her to try drops nasally, and also, a lot of people can't tolerate the way it feels. It has slight burn initially.


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PostPosted: Fri May 30, 2014 10:39 pm 
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You all are awesome. Thank you Aqua for your support and identification to my situation (both sub and my throat). :)

DB and Boop, as always you continue to post when I feel I have chased you all away with my negativity.

Funny, I was against any negative comments when I started this thread, not realizing I would be such a baby.

I do thank you all for continuing to be positive and I do appreciate your comments.

Many blessings to all of you...and Romeo to you too!!

I will do my best to taper down more. I have been praying about this and honestly I do not think I lost the days I spent when I was off the sub and spacing out more and more inbetween - even when I was sick the T3s aside from first day/night when I was at my worst, I only took 1 or 2 pills at bedtme (in the olden days would have taken every 4 hours).

I am encouraged that I have kept my dose at .5 but I should get down to .25 as I think the extra .25 was more fear in the night but instead of just dropping 50% now that I have taken .50 for a couple days I will slowly taper.

I'll get there.

I am not giving up. "A righteous man falleth 7 times and 7 times gets up again". I have heard over and over the last few weeks at church and AA /NA meetings - the words perservere and "hang in there". Must be what I need to do.

Love you all...and I know I will be reading 30 days soon from Boop and DB.


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PostPosted: Sat May 31, 2014 5:51 am 
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Hi Karen, I just want to add my support; I think you are doing great - this is not easy!! I'm around your age (and we are NOT too old!) :D also tapering, and also down to .5mgs. I've found the hardest part is mental and the fear of the unknown, .25mg just sounds SO low!! But others have done it, and I'm sure with God and the support on this site we can do it too! I think it is great that you are going to church and meetings and connecting with others. I was advised to keep my mind busy, and if possible to volunteer or help other people to get my mind off myself. I think that is good advice; In my job I help others and I find I'm not thinking about my taper much at all during these times. Also, aerobic exercise in the mornings is helping my mood (the fear of and reality of depression really freaks me out!!). It is hard to make myself do it, but I have been because I know it will give me a better chance of getting clean.
So, I hope you have a great day, and keep up the positive outlook!
rca


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PostPosted: Sat May 31, 2014 7:49 am 
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Wow, RCA, you and I are on same dose, THANK YOU for posting. Do you have a taper schedule you are on (drop 4 days, 10 days, 2 weeks)? I am actively trying to drop 10% every 10 days unless I get inspired a different way?

My only fear of myself. The progress I have seen thus far is because I was ACTIVELY trying to stop. I just dont want to get too comfortable at .5 and do the same thing I did at 1mg...just hang here for too long. I dont want it to build up too much and teach my brain it ok.

I will say I have the other side of my brain saying.."it's .5"!! I never thought Id get this low. Why not enjoy it for awhile, you are not depressed and its low enough to still feel good about yourself. If I listen to that voice, I will get complacent, I know "me".

UGH.

I know everyone is different and certainly appreciate if you are just letting your body tell you, I just dont necessarily trust my body anymore. I have to make a determined decision to drop or I get too comfortable. lol

anyway, I agree with you totally on giving back. God has really shown me His grace and strength through pain but his amazing power through simple things like picking someone up and taking them to a meeting or sharing at a meeting - I feel His presence and I that is why I can confidently say (atleast for me) that nothing is wasted if I put Him first. It may not seem so spiritual to go to a meeting or share or help someone with a ride, but if I do it for God - makes ALL the difference. I get empowered within. My days do seem stronger. For instance, my mornings used to be the worst. I couldnt wait to take my dose. Now, I wake up with no truck going through my head and my dose has been after noon (I do all my workouts and chores in morning) so to get by without sub is amazing.

I am grateful you are my same age too. I would love to keep posting with you and perhaps do this together? Love ya and THANK YOU again for sharing your experience. It helps to know someone similar to me is dealing with this too. :)


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 3:35 pm 
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Hi again Karen, thanks for posting on my thread as well. Yes, let's help each other do this!! If we can bare children, we can get through this, right? :) I did have a "plan" and that was to jump June 1 (today), but it has been a little tricky for me to get stable at .5mg, and I wanted to jump closer to .25mg to try and minimize withdrawals; my kids are only 10 and 12, so they are still pretty dependent on Mama. So, my "new" plan is that I am re-assessing, and trying to work up the courage to drop again (1mg to .5mg was my last drop, and before that 2mg to 1mg), and I need to set a new "jump" date. I am disappointed in myself that I did not jump today....but I am not giving up!
Let's do this!!!
rca


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 02, 2014 11:04 am 
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How are you doing??


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