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PostPosted: Sun Nov 12, 2017 9:29 pm 
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Hey Guys! :)

- My name is Chandler. Going to try and keep my intro positive and still tell the ups/downs of my life as an addict. I'm 20 years old. I want to start off by saying that I am truly inspired by everyone's stories on this forum. We are all different, but somehow one and the same when it comes to our struggle of addiction.

- I have always been that one kid in the family who resists any type of control, authority and especially tradition. I came out as gay when I was 13, following that my mom and dad accepted me as I am. School was very different. All the boys could tell I was different. My large group of friends suddenly became a handful of friends in 7th grade. By 8th grade I had no friends, I would eat my lunch in the bathroom everyday. Anxiety consumed me. From boys picking me up and throwing me in the dumpster behind the school playground, to them verbally tearing my self esteem down. By Feb. 2010 I was being beat up daily. I knew the bullying would escalate to the point of no return. For the bullies, not for me. I was sadly mistaken. During lunch in 8th grade (Feb 2010) I went to the bathroom as usual, this time I didn't go to the bathroom alone. Within 5 minutes 3 boys who had been bullying me daily told me 'We're gonna beat your si*sy a$$ until you die'. I don't want to go into detail as to how they fractured my tailbone, broke both of my legs, broke my left arm, scoliosis with spondylolisthesis, Herniated L4/L5 Discs. Along with worsened PTSD, Panic Disorder, GAD, and Agoraphobia. I was found unconscious in the School bathroom, Taken to the E.R. Had to undergo emergency surgery on my back and left arm. After 10 days in the hospital, I was in a lot of pain. Mentally and physically. The biggest reason being was because I was expelled for being a 'distraction' to the other fellow male students. I began searching for answers, and got none.

- From then on it was physical therapy and weekly pain management visits that turned into monthly visits. I was prescribed 120 Norco (Hydrocodone 7.5 MG/Acetaminophen 325 MG) a month. The first pill produced amazing pain relief, I was wow'd by it. 15 Minutes ago I was crying in pain, but one pill can do all of this? I feel in love with the physical euphoria. The Cognitive Euphoria forced me to stay numb to all the negative things in life. That is really to this day, why I think Opiates will always be my Drug of choice. 6 months past. I was now 15, and was taking Norco 10/325 now. Popping 3-5 at a time. By 2013 I was on Vicoprofen 120 count (Hydrocodone 7.5/Ibuprofen 200) and Oxycodone IR 20 MG (90) due to developing liver disease from excessive amounts of Tylenol taken at one time. Feb 2015 was really when my addiction went out of control. I was 18, And my Pain Management Doctor slowly tapered me off my favourite Hydros. And told me she wanted me on an Extended Release Opiate. Ms Contin 30 MG 90 count was rx'd. Morphine produced a feeling better than my Oxycodone 20 MGs, and even my Vicoprofens (I know a lot of addicts prefer Oxy over hydro and other opioids but for some reason my body loves hydro). By May 2015 I was upped to 60 MG Morphine ER 3 times daily. A bump in the road: Drug Testing. What my pain management doctor didn't know was when I would run out of my Norcos, Vicoprofen, Oxy, or Morphine throughout the years... I would turn to Suboxone. As someone in my family was being prescribed them. I knew I would be drug tested every 3 months. So in the mind of an addict I would make my Monthly scripts of Morphine ER and Oxycodone last until my drug test visit. On October 2016 I couldn't control myself. On my November 2016 visit the results came in and I tested positive for Suboxone. I have amazing doctors, I want to make that clear. She also along with doing pain management, did specialize in Suboxone Maintenance for Opioid addiction.

- Nov. 2016: I was scared, It felt like my doctor pulled the mask off my face and revealed the real Chandler. Which was so terrifying to me. I kept thinking "But I am in so much pain from my physical ailments!". My Doctor talked to me for hours and assured me that Suboxone treatment would be the best option for me. And It has been. I went from thinking so negative. My outlook on life was negative. As an addict in the midst of my addiction I believe I developed a distorted perception on a lot of things. It did take a few months to turn my 'oh poor me...' victim mentality into a I'm far from a victim, I've grown from everything that's happened in life and am now a successful person in life.

- Present Day: I am almost 21 years old, work part time as a Pharmacy Technician. Unfortunately, I have been uninsured since Obamacare was passed in my State. Which was December 2015. I apply for Medicaid, Denied due to a bill passed in my state that denies funding to my age group. Or I would qualify. Obamacare (The affordable care act, that is far from affordable for a person like me) is approved for plan around $350-750. No thanks. Anyways Healthcare should be in another thread, So I apologize it's just a topic I'm passionate about xD. I'm Prescribed the correct meds for my conditions :) I would be lying if I said I didn't have thoughts about relapsing on full agonist opiates. But the risks out weigh the benefits. I apologize for my story being so long and also mostly negative. But the moral of my story/intro is you have to learn to love yourself first, if you're unhappy with your life you will make the wrong decisions to mask your perception of life. You guys are awesome if you read this whole thread lol. I hope my story will help the sub culture of this world: The Addict. Along with making a few friends along the way would be awesome! xD I am inserting my prescribed meds that I take for therapeutic reasons below.

- My Medications: Suboxone half of a 8/2 film twice daily (30), Klonopin 1 MG (90) for Panic Disorder, GAD, And PTSD, Methylphenidate 20 MG (90) for ADD & Depression. (Been on Klonopin 1 MG since 2011 and it's been a life saver for my Panic Disorder and PTSD. Never have abused benzos nor my ADD med surprisingly)


Since I've been asked this question I would to note that there was a criminal law suit that lasted well over 3 months. The most damaging part/the cause of me losing my case was that the school testified on the bullies behalf. Even though expert medical examiners, and the teacher who found me unconscious testified on my behalf. All of that, I felt was looked over by the jury all because of the school district siding with the defendants. In March 2011 my lawyer filled a civil case against the 3 bullies and their family. I sued for $25,000 in medical bills, $75,000 for pain and suffering. I won the civil case by a unanimous jury. However I only received the $25,000 in medical bills and about $10,000 in pain and suffering.

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~ OsnapitzChandler
~ Too Blessed to be Stressed ~


Last edited by OsnapitzChandler on Thu Nov 16, 2017 1:43 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 13, 2017 8:48 am 
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Hey Chandler,

Thanks for posting your positive results with bupe! I think you'll find a very supportive community here as you continue your bupe therapy.

Best wishes,
-Orion


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 13, 2017 10:03 am 
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Hey Chandler! I'm so happy that u joined the forum where addicts can all support each other.

I'm also uninsured and understand the ridiculously high cost of insurance. If they had wanted to fine me for not having it then go for it, the fine was cheaper than the insurance. I understand chandler. I pay cash for my clinic visits and medication, it's a hefty monthly bill but I'm ok with it. If there ever becomes a day I'm not then I will figure that out then.

I'm sorry to hear about everything u had to go through in school. My oldest, he's 19, was bullied in elementary school. He fought the bullies bk and then he's the one who got punished for it. Me and my parents decided to send him to a private school because of bullying. Everything turned out ok but I still think about some of the things he had to go through. He saw a psychiatrist and was put on an antidepressant that he still takes to this day. I don't want to say that's all because of the bullying because he's had minor issues with depression but it all started around the same time. Kids can be so cruel. I hope the ppl who hurt u physically were punished for that assault!! Please tell me they were.

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Jennifer


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 16, 2017 1:43 pm 
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jennjenn wrote:
Hey Chandler! I'm so happy that u joined the forum where addicts can all support each other.

I'm also uninsured and understand the ridiculously high cost of insurance. If they had wanted to fine me for not having it then go for it, the fine was cheaper than the insurance. I understand chandler. I pay cash for my clinic visits and medication, it's a hefty monthly bill but I'm ok with it. If there ever becomes a day I'm not then I will figure that out then.

I'm sorry to hear about everything u had to go through in school. My oldest, he's 19, was bullied in elementary school. He fought the bullies bk and then he's the one who got punished for it. Me and my parents decided to send him to a private school because of bullying. Everything turned out ok but I still think about some of the things he had to go through. He saw a psychiatrist and was put on an antidepressant that he still takes to this day. I don't want to say that's all because of the bullying because he's had minor issues with depression but it all started around the same time. Kids can be so cruel. I hope the ppl who hurt u physically were punished for that assault!! Please tell me they were.


Hi JennJenn! I'm so happy some of you guys can relate to my story and are replying to my thread. Definitely makes me feel like I'm not alone. And unfortunately the 3 boys who jumped me we're no criminally punished, mostly due to when it came to testify the school sided with the 3 bullies. I expelled and they we're able to walk away free. However, my lawyer filled a civil case and I was awarded $25,000 in medical bills plus $75,000 for pain and suffering. But have only received the $25,000 in medical bills and $10,000 in the $75,000.

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~ OsnapitzChandler
~ Too Blessed to be Stressed ~


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 16, 2017 11:38 pm 
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Hi Chandler,

Welcome to the forum or as I call it, our cozy home. Come on in and make yourself comfortable.

I am Queenie, the grandmother of the forum. I just turned 75 and I have been on Suboxone for almost 8 years.

Thank you for sharing your story. You are so young to have gone through so much. I am truly sorry that you had to go through being hurt so bad that you had to have surgery and the worst of all that it led to your addiction. I'm glad you found Suboxone and that it helped you through. Please stay strong. I can tell that you are glad you are in recovery and by sharing so much with us, you are showing how serious you are about recovery.

Please stay with us. You will meet a lot of great people here. We are a family and you are welcome here.

Talk to you soon,

Love, Queenie


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 8:14 pm 
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queenie1959 wrote:
Hi Chandler,

Welcome to the forum or as I call it, our cozy home. Come on in and make yourself comfortable.

I am Queenie, the grandmother of the forum. I just turned 75 and I have been on Suboxone for almost 8 years.

Thank you for sharing your story. You are so young to have gone through so much. I am truly sorry that you had to go through being hurt so bad that you had to have surgery and the worst of all that it led to your addiction. I'm glad you found Suboxone and that it helped you through. Please stay strong. I can tell that you are glad you are in recovery and by sharing so much with us, you are showing how serious you are about recovery.

Please stay with us. You will meet a lot of great people here. We are a family and you are welcome here.

Talk to you soon,

Love, Queenie


Thank you :) And don't be sorry, I used to only thrive by playing victim from what all I have went through. But since getting off Opiates to get high and getting on Suboxone I have learned that this experience has strengthened me. Don't get me wrong I have had my slip ups, But not with Opiates surprisingly. I will be 21 years old on December 6th! I plan to stay on some form of Buprenorphine until I die. Reason being is Buprenorphine completely takes away my cravings, provides mild pain relief, and I've found it to synergize well with my Methylphenidate for the treatment of my ADD and Depression.

Again, I appreciate the kind words :)

Much Love,
OsnapitzChandler

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~ OsnapitzChandler
~ Too Blessed to be Stressed ~


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 7:56 pm 
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Hi Chandler, I just wanted to say hi and I'm so happy for you that you found Suboxone and got in recovery at such a young age. I was in a bad car accident and was on pain pills from age 20 to 44. I would give anything to have found Suboxone sooner, like when I was in my twenties. I'm glad to hear that it is working good with your other meds as well. That's awesome. Your forum friend, Angie


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