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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2013 6:12 pm 
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There are several people on this forum right now either tapering or going cold turkey off Suboxone. I didn't want to post this on someone's thread because it's not directed at any one specific person. This is just something to think about. When I first got into opiates I was a young 37 woman who had just given birth to a healthy baby after a super healthy pregnancy. My drug use ramped up over the next several years, and by the time I got on Sub I was 43 and had not really been taking the best care of myself during my active addiction. After another 2+ years on Sub I did a fairly quick taper and went off of Sub. I then turned 46.

Dr J. has written many times in his blog that we as addicts are constantly "scanning" ourselves and taking stock of how we feel - much more so than the average person. After a couple of months off Suboxone I had my days where I felt tired, maybe didn't sleep well or had my aches and pains. The question is, how does this differ from any other 46 year old woman who is not exactly in the best shape of her life? I started talking to other women who are the same age, have a house, kids, husband & job like me. It turns out they, too, often suffered from, fatigue, sleepless nights, aches and pains and even anxiety. This isn't to say that PAWS isn't real. It's just to say that even "normal" people don't feel their best every day, and not every ache and pain is due to Suboxone withdrawal.

Many of us have spent years in active addiction, maybe followed by years on Sub. Unless we're still in our 20's I don't think it's fair to expect to be exactly as we were before we went through all this. We're not as young as we used to be. I'm not defeatist and I do believe that a woman my age can be healthy and have a zest for life. I just don't think it's realistic to think that we will go through life feeling 100% on top of the world everyday. Just food for thought :)


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 5:04 pm 
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As a 22 year old male, ill let you know how PAWS goes :)


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 6:10 pm 
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Touché


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 10:46 pm 
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Lilly,

I totally get what you are saying. Im 40 now and know that occasional aches and pains are definitely part of life. Nobody feels 100% all the time, addict or not.

I totally feel like writing that in response to some people who come on here and analyze every little ache and pain they have during withdrawl. I dont though because I havent quit sub yet.

Great post Lilly.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 3:58 am 
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I have absolutely NO idea what you're talking about since I'm super duper young!! ;) No, I totally get that at 41, I'm probably getting the aches and pains more associated with my age. I did notice a big difference, though, when I went from 16 mg per day to 8 mg. The joint pain I had experienced at 16 mg totally left me. But that is different from what you're talking about.

I try not to be in the habit of complaining every time I have a little ache or pain I experience. I definitely notice more of them now though. :)

Amy

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 9:42 am 
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My... Pinky Toe, Big Toe, Middle Toe, Feet, Ankles, Feet Hair, Feet Skin, Shins, Knees, Kneecap, Knee skin, Quads, Thighs, Pelvis, butt, Left Cheek, Right Cheek, Tailbone, Spine, Lower Back, Back, Shoulders, Arms, Fingers, hand, Wrists, Neck, Ears, Chin, Teeth, Tongue, Exo-skeleton IS ALL KILLLLLLLLLING ME!

URGAGARAHRGARHHHHHHHHHH!

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:25 am 
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I'm still in my 20's (only JUST) ... and I swear even I've noticed a difference in myself over the last few years. It's not so noticeable in general day to day life, but if I feel withdrawal now, I seem to feel it a lot worse. In my early 20's I was able to play volleyball on day 4-5 of a heroin detox. Now that's pretty much unheard of.

I also think that being on opioids, especially in active addiction, makes us lose touch with what it feels like to experience the bodily sensations of day to day life. It's not unheard of for people to come out of opioid addiction, and think that they're having a heart attack whenever their pulse rate climbs a bit, or as you said Lilley it can be hard to accept that there IS some normal pain in day-to-day living.

I think one of the reasons I became an addict was because I couldn't accept this day-to-day pain was normal... or I couldn't live with it. But having bipolar apparently makes this day-to-day pain a bit harder to bear at times, so I don't put it solely down to me being a pain-sissy. There must be a reason bipolar has a 50% rate of substance abuse.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 7:38 am 
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i love how you all opened my eyes to this fantasy of being 100%.

i too experienced less joint pain when i lowered my dose. i still have the aches in the injured areas but that awful ankle and feet thing has lessened quite a bit since the drop.

ugh being 40 + female with more then half her years in active use can feel a little rough sometimes. lol

really want to start to exercise just not finding time

i needed that food for thought. just wish that 100% was there.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 1:09 pm 
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I know when I got off opiates, I was waiting to return to 150% (that's how opiates made me feel a lot of the time). Coming to terms with the fact that I'd never reach 150% again was daunting. THEN I had to deal with what you guys are all talking about....not even being what I remember 100% to be. The last time I was 100% me, I was 15 years old. I was actually comparing where I was at 43 years old with what I remembered 100% was at 15 years old.....big gap there!!! LOL

Ugh, accepting life on life's terms SUCKS sometimes!! :D

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