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 Post subject: I'm still alive
PostPosted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 8:48 pm 
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Hi guys! I just thought I would drop a note and let you all know I still exist and haven't relapsed or anything like that. I know how frustrated everyone gets when people drop off the face of the planet. The reality is that it is nice outside. We only get about 8 weeks of nice out of the year and I had promised myself that I wouldn't waste them this year. Last year I kind of had that depressed or who cares or lack of interest attitude about my life and I slept my summers away in a suboxone snooze. Of course that kind of irritated my husband and when I went back on suboxone I promised things would be different.

Well they have been different. I am on a lower dose which I am not sure I am pleased about but it is ok. I have not been sleeping my summer away but have read several really amazing books. I haven't been watching tv. My husband and I put money down on a rental home so we are dealing with a bunch of mortgage loan garbage which I hate. Work is status quo but ok......still stressful but that is just work. We went on vacation. We have gone out of town a few times. We have taken the boat out. I am getting a tan. Thrilling eh? But this is life on suboxone. I am actually living it. I am not obsessed about taking my pills because I take it once per day, in the morning, and forget about it. I have money because I am not wasting it on drugs. I am living for today because my life isn't consumed by my addiction. I am actually enjoying my life.

This isn't to say there aren't issues. My husband has annoyed me a few times. My sister and I have been fighting for over a month and aren't speaking. This mortgage thing is driving me nuts. My dogs have been sick multiple times. You know....things that before would have caused me to use. Today I don't even think about it and things are just fine.

I apologize for not being there for those who need someone and aren't at this point yet. I do feel like I should be here for them. At the same time, this is one of the first times in my life I am putting me first and I am going to let myself do that for the summer. So I will probably be more active when it starts raining over here, which is basically September through May and hope you will all forgive me for taking this time out.

Best wishes to everyone!

Cherie

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Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.

- Winston Churchill


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:52 pm 
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Joined: Tue May 18, 2010 9:08 pm
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Wow, that is great to hear that you're doing so well. I think we had all heard about you being out of town some, so I wasnt' worrying about your absence from the forum but to tell you the truth I was missing you some and wondering how you're doing. I agree with you that summers should be enjoyed. Sorry to hear about troubles with mortgage and your sister, and your dogs being sick, etc--but you're right, life will involve some difficulties and you just have to cope, which it sounds like that is what you're doing. Thanks for checking in.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 10:37 pm 
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I'm glad you are putting yourself first and making a priority of enjoying your summer. Us PNW people have to cram it all into those good 8 weeks so we have something to look back on to get us through February!

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You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 30, 2010 9:21 am 
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Good to hear from you, jack. I agree with Diary, I think it's great that you're putting yourself first. We all need to do that sometimes - we're no good to others if we don't take care of ourselves. Have yourself a terrific summer!

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-As I have grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.

-I'm only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.


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