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PostPosted: Sun Oct 30, 2016 10:36 pm 
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The leaves are changing colors, the temperature is dropping and I just want to throw the covers over my head and stay in bed and do nothing again. It's the time of year I was hoping I wouldn't have to deal with. "Maybe the Suboxone will take care of it this year," I thought to myself. Well, unfortunately "the winter time blues" as I like to refer to it, is well on it's way to try to take me out again. I want to isolate myself when everyone else is jumping for joy because the holidays are approaching. I'll have to drag myself to the pharmacy to buy the usual vitamin D capsules. Ugh, I just want to stay in bed. There is no need to go to the Dr. and get back on Lexapro, it's more trouble than it's worth. The waiting 4 weeks and going back to the Dr. for the increase then waiting a month or so and turning around and having to put up with the mess that comes along with coming off SSRI's... No thank you. Been there, done that... I'll just wait till that first sunny spring day where I can put on my bathing suit and go outside and lay out in the sun again. I just do it at the beginning of spring and I'll be flooded with endorphins enjoying every minute of it as I feel old man winter's grip on me loosening by the seconds. I've lain in the tanning beds during the winter when it gets bad and that seem to help, even though I know it's not good for my skin. It's all a big hassle and I'm not looking forward to it, but hey, at least I'm off pain meds. this year and maybe it wont affect me as bad as it has in the past. I'll just have to wait and see. Who knows? I may have a few sunny days left to indulge in the sun bathing, which I usually don't partake in. I may go out and lay by the lake tomorrow and catch some last of the suns rays this year... Man, I really felt this seasonal depression with all it's force this weekend. Thanks for letting me vent. Bama girl :cry:


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 31, 2016 12:29 pm 
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Aww Bama I'm sorry ur dealing with that! Do u know what I've noticed about me?? Now this is weird to u I'm sure, but I start getting sadness around spring time lol. Nothing awful and it goes away pretty quick but I've always been super crazy excited about Fall and Winter! I absolutely love it. So when it starts ending I get minor waves of depression. That's probably more like a dreaded sadness, it's not bad and doesn't effect me to much like it does u though. I just wanted to share my weirdness for Fall and Winter lol.

I've read a few things on the forum with others that suffer with this too. Teejay, if I remember correctly, has experienced seasonal depression. U may wanna search around for that, could help u relate ur feelings. Any kind of depression is sucky. I wish the suboxone would have helped more with ur sadness too. Is it something that eventually passes or does it stick around til warm weather starts bk up again? I'm sorry ur feeling like that, ur always such a happy presence on this forum. If u need us, we are here for u!!! ♡

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 31, 2016 3:10 pm 
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Ya know, it could be worse. I've come to be grateful that I live in the Southern region of the country so we don't have an awful long Winter here. So there is always end in sight. I am always aware that the end will be here soon enough, and just keeping that in mind always seems to help. I usually notice the on coming of it, and the leaving, if you will, more so that the actual down months so it's not as bad as it could get. Just something I've been aware of ever since I was diagnosed years ago. Not to fret dear, but thanks for asking. And I must say your love for Fall and Winter plum amazes me! You live in a beautiful part of the country where you experience just the right amount of Winter especially. I would freeze to death in Maine or New York. LOL I bet the foliage is beautiful where u are right about now. Enjoy it hun. I sure think a lot of not to "know" you. Have a blessed day, from one Southern Belle to another... Angie


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 31, 2016 3:34 pm 
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Angie ur pretty awesome :)

Oh yes it's yellow and red leaves everywhere and I love it. However I'm not happy about how warm it is here for this time of yr. It's around 80! Not happy lol, it's a record breaker for this time of yr after a record breaker heat wave summer. I just want relief from the heat I've been dealing with since May. But it's still not messing with the foliage, it's great. I like sweatshirts, cardigans, snow boots and a warm cozy house when it's cold. How cold so ur winters get?

Happy Halloween!!!!!!!

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 31, 2016 4:00 pm 
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Well, I'm in East Central Alabama, so if you've ever paid attention to the weather in Atlanta, Ga., that is how it is here. We hardly ever get snow, I hate that too. Even when Atlanta did last year, we did not. But we have some cold weather. It gets down in the 30's. LOL That's pretty cold for us. We have seen colder, but not a lot colder, and not for any amount of time. Very mild climate indeed. Now one this, the humidity and cold mixed together is not good for my injuries in my legs. You remember I broke 28 breaks from my waste down in a car wreck. Even when I put on layers and layers, it seems the humidity cuts straight to the bone when it's cold out side. And the heat as well, but not painful, just uncomfortable, as I'm sure your aware. I always like to get warm around a good ol bon fire when it starts to get cold. I don't know if that's a southern thing or a drinking thing, but down here in Alabama, the bon fires and drinking seem to go hand in hand. But I've never been a drinker, so that is a blessing. This has been nice chatting with you today. It's kind of like one of the other girls mentioned having a pen pal back in school. ttyl Angie


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 05, 2016 7:36 pm 
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Yeah I get serious autumn blues. When the days start getting shorter and there's a heaviness in the air. When it happens, it can get so bad I can barely leave the flat. If I try to function, see clients or go to university, I can barely understand a word of what anyone is saying or asking me to do. It's like my brain shuts down and is weighed down by a horrible feeling of emptiness and hopelessness.

Sadly after experiencing April blues (I'm in the southern hemisphere) for most of my life, I still haven't found a solution. Tried ALL supplements, LOADS of medications, exercise, moving to sunnier parts of the world.

In the end the ONLY thing that had any impact was (a) temporarily increasing my lithium until my levels are over 1.0 mmol/l and (b) increasing my antidepressant. Increasing the antidepressant doesn't do as much, it's mainly the lithium increase that helps. My doctor often wants me to go to hospital when I have my April blues because of risk of self-harm. The problem with that is the hospital he works at is a block away from my city's biggest heroin-peddling projects. So these days if I get seriously depressed, I prefer to skip town and isolate. It protects me from my heightened risk of overdose if I'm away from urban areas.

If you have any self-harm ideation, lithium is a good medication. It doesn't give an obvious mood-lift like SSRI's, but it has so many benefits for people with bipolar. Lithium and Suboxone are two medications I attribute with saving my life.


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2016 5:48 pm 
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Well bless your heart and thanks for all the input on the medicine. I don't know a lot about bipolar meds but have been put on all kind of depression medication. For the most part, I am not even depressed. Just when the weather first changes. It has lightened up for the time being. But lord yes, the depression medicine, I an no stranger to. And the kicker is I wasn't even depressed. Just a plain ol addict. Addict behavior is very similar to depression type behavior, or so I was told by a physiatrist. Yes, a couple of the stronger meds I was placed on over the years were Chlorpromazine and imipramine. Lexapro was the last but now I am on nothing but Suboxone, and am doing great. I have read many of your post, and I am so sorry you struggle the way you do with your depression and bipolar problems. I was real happy to see you had weighed in on this topic. HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING? An addictive personality being misdiagnosed as being depressed? I do have a bit of seasonal depression, but it's not too bad, so far. Not to the point of needing medicine to help control it. Thanks for responding. Bama girl


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 7:55 pm 
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What did you think of Chlomipramine? That medication sent me SOO crazy manic in 2013. And messed me up sexually for over a year, even though I only took it for a month. I remember at the start of 2013 I was so depressed I basically pleaded with my doctor to put me on it because I read it was the "strongest SNRI", and I just wanted relief. Within a couple of days of taking it, I was sweating like a pig 24 hours a day, crazy happy, sexually I felt like a eunuch, and I was using drugs like a fiend. Ended up experiencing the most crazy relapse shortly thereafter.

Regarding being diagnosed depressed when you only believe you have an addict personality. For many people it's not that simple. There's a real murky chicken-or-egg relationship between mental illness and drug addiction.

I personally feel I would not have had the desire to turn to drugs in the first place if I didn't experience mental health problems. And these days the ONLY time I'm tempted to relapse into addiction is when I'm severely depressed, or full-blown-manic (though that rarely happens these days). And like you, this depression only happens in autumn.

But I get the fact you don't want to turn to medication. If you can function through your depressive periods without medication, then why use meds?


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 9:00 pm 
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Whoo we, yes, that was a strong one. It was so long ago, around 2000. I was going through a really rough time and was threatening suicide so I went inpatient for a couple of weeks at a hospital in Georgia. They put me on that medication and another one that sounds something like milireal. I know the spelling is not correct. But as I was trying to adjust to getting on it, I had some bad reactions. Like we had to line up every morning at 5 am for our vital signs to be taken. I LOVE my sleep so I always ran down there to be the first in line so I could go back to sleep while everyone else was being seen. Well this one morning I jumped off the bed, and you know your not sub post to rise fast on a new medicine like that. Shoot! I got so dizzy and started to see tunnel vision and sweating like crazy. I was about to fall so I turned around and ran back to my bed and I made it just in time to fall out in my bed. Needless to say, I sat up very carefully from then own out and let my body catch up with my thoughts. I wasn't on that medication but a couple of months though. I used to be so stubborn. I wouldn't do right. LOL I'm an only child and I've got that king baby syndrome. It's a real syndrome to. Describes to me to a "T". Glad to hear from you T.J. How R U doing?-------------------------------------------------Bama girl


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 12, 2017 7:39 pm 
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has anyone else had success with a "happy light" to treat their SAD??

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 01, 2017 8:58 pm 
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No but I've looked into it. Might give it a try.

My autumn blues came significantly earlier this year, from Feb-March rather than April-May. So it was more late summer blues. Yesterday was the first April Fool's day I had happy for a long time!


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2017 6:49 pm 
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TeeJay wrote:
No but I've looked into it. Might give it a try.

My autumn blues came significantly earlier this year, from Feb-March rather than April-May. So it was more late summer blues. Yesterday was the first April Fool's day I had happy for a long time!

wow. i don't remember writing that. but i do have 3 happy lights. there was a sale! i have a happy light alarm clock that gradually wakes you up with the light getting brighter and soothing sounds. you can pick frogs, ocean or a couple others. it's pretty cool. not sure that i could say any of the lights have helped. but they didn't hurt.

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