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PostPosted: Wed Nov 05, 2014 2:36 pm 
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Hey everyone I want to introduce myself my name is Andy and I am an addict. As I look back at my worst moments I really am amazed at how I am still alive. When my addiction began I was 24 had a six figure pay I job as a finance manager and the world was my oyster. The first time I was offered a Norco I threw it away. The second time I was not as strong. Caught up in the stress of my job and pressure to deliver results I was visibly not ready to work that morning. My co-worker handed me again another little yellow pill and told me it would get my head in the right place. So stressed out I didn't care at all what I was about to do so I took it and he was right it made me feel great. I had the best weekend of my professional career to date and I gave credit to my yellow pill.
For a long time I kept it to only on the days I worked but then I started doing it on my days off. What reallyput my addiction into a bad down ward spiral was when I was taught that snorting gave a much better high. The only issue is the jolt was all I got so Ineeded do do it much sooner than before and very quickly I went from 3 a day to 7 a day to at my worst 40 a day. I was snorting 40 or more pills a day. To function I had to snort 8 just to get motivated to get ready to work. I had 2 new borns and I was so careless with my addiction I was leaving crushed residue everywhere. Not believing my wife was catching on I kept on my habit. Nights as I stayed up crushing and snorting pill after pill as I got ready to go to sleep I would do my last 8 to be able to sleep and would wonder if that was the night my family would find me dead. It had full control to the point I was choosing it over my family. Through the grace of god my wife was wise and knew exactly what was going on and was researching and trying to find a way to save me. She staged my intervention and found suboxone therapy.
At first I was hesitant but I remember getting down to my last 36 norco which is usually when I would have went to my supplier I instead chose to just run out to begin therapy. When I woke up and wasn't able to get my fix I went into the most painful withdraws. As I laid on my couch catatonic from the pain my son was calling my name to play and I immediately began to cry. I had let a yellow pill stop me from being a father and husband. To this day if the thought of use comes to my mind I think back to laying on my couch.
It has been 22 months since I last used and if it wasn't for suboxone therapy I would not have been able to do it. My only plea to our community is lets not give the government reasons to make our treatment so difficult. We need to be accountable to each other and I know that accountability is too much to ask of us addicts but we must try. Recovery is not going to happen for me tomorrow as I am an addict for life. At least through the help of suboxone I have been able to begin to stop my addict behaviors while being part of society.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 05, 2014 3:10 pm 
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Welcome Andy, thank you so much for your story. You hit me right between the eyes and reminded me why im still here today too..
22 months and going stroug. Good for you Andy!!
We all seem to get here the same but with somewhat different curves in the road.
I can say that without family or a great love in our lives recovery seems to be harder to find.
Great that your wife didnt give up on you.
Just wanted to tell you i got so much out of your post. It is a post of hope
that maybe some one on the fence will see and make to jump from active
addiction.
Im almost 4 years in, lots of recovery work has been done too.
Have no plan of jumping off anytime soon. Im in the "aint broke, dont fix it" column. Its safe .

Really liked what you said about accountability! I dont read that word much, but do know
it may be the corner stone of sobriety. Helping others in the same boat as well..

Welcome aboard Andy an keep posting friend....


Razor


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 05, 2014 3:58 pm 
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I too enjoyed ur story. It's also a reminder how much suboxone can put ur life and mind bk in working order. I have to admit, when I keep reading about complaints and side effects about this medication it makes me wanna say....isn't the side effects worth the effects of when u used???? It's very refreshing to know there's appreciation and recognition just what a blessing suboxone is. I feel like I think a lot like u do Andy and Razor. I love to read how much this medication helps instead of how it's ruining lives. I'd take this forever before I'd go bk to losing my kids and house again. Welcome Andy!!!!

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2014 12:56 am 
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It's great to have you here on the forum, Andy! I love reading the stories of others. We addicts all have some commonalities even when our stories are different indeed!

Thank God for your wife!! Awesome that she figured out that you needed help. Wanting to be a better mom and wife gave me the courage to rat myself out to my pain doctor. I was fortunate that he was able to direct me to my current suboxone doctor. It's been a little over 3 years that I was induced and I've felt really good on my current dose of 2mg.

Make sure that you ask questions if you need information. There are lots of great, knowledgeable, folks on this forum, and they love to help!

Amy

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2015 6:10 am 
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That was a great story andy. i believe that recovery starts with your self. and the strength of willingness to be recovered.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 3:35 pm 
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Thank you for sharing your story. The unfortunate thing about having such a high income was that it gave you a ton of access to the drugs. Hopefully, you were able to maintain your job during your recovery or find something similar or even better. Just consider a rough patch in your life and never look back.


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