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 Post subject: Ready set go
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 2:27 am 
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Took my last round of Vic's tonight. I've been using all day every day for about a year. I can eat 10 bananas over a day (total of 100mg) but usually hold about 60. I'm a mother of a beautiful 3 year old and have a professional job. I have still been functioning but barely holding on. Saw an opiate specialist counselor today . She was wonderful. I got a script for subs from a doc and he to,d me to take my first dose after 12 hours of my last Vic. From what I have read and what my counselor says this is a no no. I need to go into pretty hard w/ds before my first sub dose. So I have no more Vic's. Go to work tomorrow , pick up my son and plan to feel pretty shitty Friday night. Hoping to make it till Saturday am before a take the subs. I know my docs want my goal to be total sobriety ( i quit drinking 8 years ago bc I'm an alcoholic - I walked away with actually no problem). But I have secured several Xanax bars to help me through this weekend. I'm tired of being tired getting into debt and letting Vic's be the first and last thought of each day . My son deserves better as do I. I'm scared but somewhat excited to feel the shitty w/ds as I haven't felt for so long. I have learned so much from reading your stories. I'm thankful for this space and it feels good to talk about this. I've been damn good at keeping this on the down low. I have two friends and my baby's daddy who know what's up and know my plan. Any suggestions would be much appreciated. Peace and love, ray


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 10:19 am 
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Welcome,
I was in your same shoes exactly 1 week ago. You definately want to wait as long as you can before taking that first dose of sub. The xanax should help you, a little anything to take the edge off is a blessing. I paid 100 for 4 x 10mg Val because I was so desperate for relief. Think I got 2 hours of sleep out of that. Hopefully you can knock yourself out bc sleeping sucks. Also look up the COWS scale, its a scale to help you measure how long you are into withdrawal and the recommended time to take your dose. You want to go by how bad your withdrawal is and not really how long you waited because everyone is different. The first 2 days are hell, by the second day i took my first sub, then things eased up significantly. I waited longer bc I had a stronger addiction to oxycontin. Im sure some more experienced members can give you some better advice when it comes to Vicodin. Its day 7 for me and I still feel some mild symptoms, stomach issues, tired, but I know I'm off and that is huge. You will be there soon, I also am a professional and by monday i was able to work normally. Just get through the next 2 days


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 12:43 pm 
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Hello, and welcome. I was doing the same thing as you...100mg hydrocodone/day. I was on it for 2 years though and took Norco (10mg/325mg). I just started sub 6 days ago. I was scared of taking the sub too soon after my last pill too, and people here helped me a lot! I cut down the last 2 days...took 50mg on Thursday, 25mg on Friday, and was inducted on Saturday 17 hours after my last pill. I was in moderate withdrawal...I didn't feel as horrible as I have when I'd run out of pills in the past, but I definitely felt it...especially the last couple hours before my appt. I was getting worried because my appt was at 8am and the night before I didn't even feel that bad. I took an OTC sleeping pill to help me get some sleep, but didn't get much because my mind wouldn't shut off...probably only slept 2 hours that night. Anyway, when I did get up in the morning I felt pretty bad (like I did every morning) and by the time I was at the doctor's office I was at 20 on the COWS scale. 10 minutes after taking it I had relief, and 20 minutes after taking it I was all better!


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:01 pm 
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Rayanne,

Good for you! Our stories have some similarities as well. I also have a beautiful 3 1/2 yr. old son. I am employed as a social worker, carrying a caseload of adults with developmental disabiliites. My husband and I began using over 7 years ago...using everything under the sun (pain killers).

When I got pregnant, quitting was not an issue. However during that period my husband found a more consistent hook-up, with mass quantities of oxy's, so shortly after I had my son, it was easy to start again. I was also diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis when pregnant and began receiving a script for Vic's along with my other meds.

For the last 3 yrs. we have talked about needing to stop, and finally came to the point of HAVING to stop. We spent our entire savings (nearly $50,000) during the last 4 yrs. The WD's were so bad that I was unable to function at work anymore, and my co-workers started noticing my odd behaviors.

My sister is aware of what's going on and finally threatened to tell my mom and force me into treatment if I didn't address it. I started using subs about 10 months ago. We couldn't afford for my husband and I both to go, so I have been splitting my dose with him. On one hand it's good because I have been taking less than prescribed from the very beginning, on the other hand it's been bad b/c we sometimes run out early.

It hasn't been easy, even since starting the subs. What I do know is I would never forgive myself if my son grew up and later in life realized what our odd behavior was all about, or thought it was ok to use b/c he knew his parents had. My husbnad grew up with parents that were using (both are sober now) but he knows now and can remember the weird things they did and said and now knows what they were doing. This has been the most difficult thing I have ever been up against.

I wish you the best of luck! This forum has helped me realize I'm not alone and I don't have to feel ashamed.


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