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PostPosted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 2:29 pm 
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[font=Tahoma] [/font] I recently made the decision that the best personal choice for me was to quit Subs cold turkey. It took a lot of education and mental preparation, but I am finally ready. I have decided to post my daily progress, to help others who are making the same decision as me or trying to educate themselves. Before I begin, here's a little back story.

I started my drug use journey when I was 18 years old. It actually all started because of some tooth pain that was driving me completely insane and keeping me up crying at night. Before I started using pills, I had only ever smoked a little pot. I was terrified of drugs because growing up my mom was a severe heroin addict and I saw what she went through and what our family went through as a result.

When my tooth pain became intolerable, I went to the ER, because I didn't have insurance or any other way to find relief. They prescribed me Hydrocodone and told me to get to a dentist ASAP. The Hydro was a HUGE relief. I only had 10, and was able to take them here and there when necessary over the next couple months. They helped tremendously.

When I ran out, and found myself in the same position, and ex boyfriend of mine came to the rescue. He was prescribe Percocets and began sharing them with me. I took them here and there and found myself not only feeling relieved but really enjoying being high.

Slowly but surely my tolerance to pills increased, like it is always sure to do. I found myself taking Oxy 30s and 80s, buying them, stealing them, whatever I could do. I had a daily habit which meant I would go into full blown withdrawl without them.

My mom was in recovery at this point and taking Methadone. She was doing well and getting take home bottles... And so I stopped taking pills and started stealing from her. Initially I was just taking a bit off the top and adding water, but eventually I was doing a lot more then that, and she found out and started helping me by skipping a daily dose to give it to me. When my problem got way too big to handle, and I was doing a bit better financially, I went to see a sub doctor.

When I went to the doctor, it had been 5 years since my addition first began. He started me at 8mg of sub, and it worked fine for me. I took 8mg for the next 2 years.

Now, I'm 25, and in a good place in my life. I'm a full time student and recently engaged and very happy. I had a desperate urge to be done with Subs, and so I began a taper. My taper was successful until I got to 2mg, and then I found it really difficult. I don't know if it was in my head or not, but any teeny tiny little amount I tried to taper still made me feel sick. Not crazy sick, just annoying sick. I decided to stop prolonging and just take the jump. It isn't the best decision for everyone, but it feels right to me. I ran out of Subs today, so this morning I took my final dose. I usually take 2mg, but today I only took 1. I feel fine and am sure I will through the rest of the day and night. And so my journey begins...

I will write detailed accounts every day of what I'm feeling, thinking, doing. I hope that my story and experience can help someone else going through it or thinking about making the same decision.

Thanks for reading, and wish me luck!


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 2:56 pm 
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good on you! get some immodium and supplements ready also. and as much as i hate to say it, i think that restful legs homeopathic stuff actually works. RLS always broke me when i tried to kick. i figured homeopath was a bunch of bull....a memory of a chemical or something? wtf? it actually helped me though.

i'm on day 14 right now, and jumped at 2mg. music has helped me tremendously, as well as exercise. it might suck to get started but i'll put hard cash down you'll feel better after a short workout and a shower.

positive mental attitude. remember it. repeat it.

i really have no self control, i always ran out of subs 2 weeks early and the docs kept filling. i stopped because of opioid-induced hyperalgesia. 2 days after stopping subs i was pain free. really weird.

hang in there. dont worry about yesterday, or tomorrow.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 29, 2013 6:21 am 
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Thanks for the support!

I have Imodium, and tizanidine (clonidine). I'm gonna take your word for it and grab some of the restful legs stuff... That's always been my worst symptom as well!

I know bc of the long shelf life a lot of people don't even feel withdrawal until after a few days. This is not the case for me -- mine starts right away, perhaps cuz of my low dose. I started getting sick last night. I'm hoping getting sick quicker means getting through this quicker. Keeping a positive mental attitude just like you said. ;)

Congrats on being sub free for 14 days! And being pain free! That's pretty crazy.

I appreciate the advice and kind words!


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 29, 2013 6:29 am 
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Magnesium is a good supplement for the muscle aches and pains.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 29, 2013 10:32 am 
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Hello AnonymousHLS and welcome to the forum. I'm new here also and wanted to introduce myself. Our stories are similiar except I was on 24mgs of Suboxone and tapered myself down to a 2mg dose. I tried jumping from there many times and just couldn't do it. Had to get right back on the 2mg.

I've made the decision to taper from 2mg and yesterday was my first dose reduction of .063mg which is a tiny, tiny amount, but one I myself find necessary to get off this stuff. I will remain on each dose for 4-7 days and keep reducing down to as little as possible and then jump one final time.

I started my own thread also to keep a journal of my progress. You can take a look at if if you like. This looks like a great forum to be a part of. I've had a few members welcome me and provide a few ideas and suggestions for which I am grateful.

Anyway all the best to you and I will keep checking your thread for updates. And congrats on your engagement. Today is your first day clean and I hope the days keep adding up for you. Take care and I'll talk to you again soon.

Karen


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 29, 2013 4:02 pm 
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Hi Anonymous,

Welcome to the forum!!!

Jumping from 2mg is a little on the high side, but if you want it bad enough, you can do it. We've had several members here who were able to make the jump from 2mg.

For some of us, jumping is the only way out. I jumped off about 8mg or so and made it. I had a rough ride, but then again, I jumped from 8mg!! (can you say dummie!! lol)

Your Imodium and Clonidine will help. Good thinking to get those. Like Fiveseven15 said, hot showers will make you feel good, too. Music is going to sound amazing as well. Put in your favorite CD and BLAST it!! :D

Other than that, keep your mind and body busy. If you sit around and focus on how crappy you feel, it'll only make you feel crappier. Get up and do stuff. :wink:

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 30, 2013 5:02 am 
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Thank you guys so much for the warm welcome and support! It's nice to meet you guys and hear your stories and experiences. It helps a lot.

Day 1

I think waking up sick was the hardest part of my day. I pretty much just laid around. Restlessness and back pain were my worst symtoms. I took Tizanidine and it helped a bit, especially as night came because it makes me sleepy. I used a couple Lidocaine patches for back pain and that helped a bit too. I drank a ton of Gatorade to stay hydrated... And I had to pee like every half hour. Just that walk to the bathroom made me feel pretty weak. I watched a ton of movies... And laughed and cried and enjoyed that. I'm super emotional. As far as food goes... I'd get hungry, but then as soon as I'd start to eat, I couldn't enjoy it and I got full pretty quick. Still tried to get a few small and healthy bites in through out the day. When nightfall came, but symptoms upped a notch. Yawns like crazy, watery eyes, and minor sniffles. I took 2 Tizanidine and it knocked me right out. Being able to sleep through the night made me very grateful -- ESP because what drives me the most crazy is just the annoyingness of the mild symtoms... It's just enough to make you want to jump right out of your skin, or rip it off, or something ANYTHING for a break/some relief. And so I slept straight through the night. Overall, I think my day went pretty well. I kept a positive attitude and tried not to think about it. I was lucky to have some company for part of my day -- my mom, who's been through this before -- and her watching movies with me and just chatting kept my mind off things (even though I was a little irritable). Grateful for a mild day. Even more grateful for the support and outlet of this community, and for 1 day completely clean and sober!


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 30, 2013 3:30 pm 
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You hang in there Anonymous. I have heard that each day clean gets better and better for you. Can't hardly wait to find that out for myself. My friends tell me that all the time. They also say that staying as busy as possible helps so much. And any kind of exercise helps get your natural endorphins going which all equals up to you feeling better. Also listening to your favorite music helps keep your mind occupied.

Make sure you stay well hydrated to help flush out all those toxins. The gatorade will certainly help, but plain old water works wonders too!

You are doing awesome! Just take it one day at a time and don't use again no matter what. Please keep updating your progress.

Karen


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 30, 2013 9:31 pm 
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Being super emotional during wd is completely normal, don't let it get ya down.

I'm glad you were able to watch a lot of movies and that your mom was there to help you pass the time, but you may find getting out of the house to be more beneficial to you. I imagine your brain (if it's anything like mine) is telling you NOT to go out and do things, but forcing yourself out will actually help.

Keep digging deep, keep holding on and believe that you will get better. During my wd, I really, really wondered if I'd ever feel normal again. The good news is yes you will, the crap news is that it takes time.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 02, 2013 3:34 pm 
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Hey Anonymous,

Haven't heard from ya in a few days and checking to make sure you were doing ok. Maybe you could let us know how your doing when you get a few minutes? Hope everything is running along smoothly for you. Take care and catch ya later.

Karen
xoxo


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