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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 1:25 am 
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I was taking everything from loratabs, then methadone, fetanyl, oxy's, & finally roxi's. I have been thru everyone of those withdrawals(which led to the use of the next drug) I have been on suboxone for 4 weeks, all the other times I didn't really want to quit, it was more that I ran out & had w/d's. Last month I finally looked in the mirror & said I am DONE. Called the sub clinic & was given 2-8mg a day. I have been weaning done the past few days, I only took a 1/4 today. I had to drink a ton of coffee to keep up with my kids, but other than that, cutting down has been fine. My doc says to take it for a max of 2 months. My next Dr appt is coming up, after what I read about w/d's after taking it for a long time, I am ready to stop. Mentally I am there, I have seen my life come back, I do what I used to 5 yrs ago, so I am fully confident that I won't relapse. My biggest fear is the withdrawal stories I have heard of. If anyone knows what I will go thru please post. Also, as a footnote, my 4 kids ALL have a bad cold & some nausea...I DO NOT want to confuse withdrawal symptoms with the beginnings of a cold, since the fear of withdrawal was the main thing keeping me using. I haven't actually wanted the pills in the past year, just the memory of w/d's scared me into continuing my addiction. I also have enough xanax for the next 10 days if I take a 1/2 each night. Thank you.

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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 5:13 am 
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I am sitting here at 1:30 in the morning nine months after quiting sub and I still have some insomnia. I tapered down to the smallest pieces I could cut with a razor blade for the last eight months of my year on sub (after five years on methadone). It was about five days after my jump that I really got sick since it takes several days for sub to clear. Then 25 days in blackest hell before my GI problems cleared up. After that it was bearable but there was no way I could have gone to work. I started sleeping one hour a night after one month and add a half hour per night per month until now. I'm beginning to realize that my withdrawal was more severe than most but by no means unique. Since I did not know nor had ever met anyone who had ever kicked suboxone I thought until recently I was one of the only people who had ever done it. Over the last few weeks in suboxone forums I have learned that others have successfully quit and their experiences have varied from a few weeks of tough but manageable to months of seemingly endless misery that only the strongest survive. Many people say it is easier if you taper down and stabilize at the lowest dose you can possbly measure before you jump. Something that made it more difficult for me was having no one to tell me what to expect. I was experiencing such ridiculous anxiety that I became afraid that I had underlying health problems that I might never recover from.It was eight months before I realized it was just the PAWS. Good luck and I will answer any questions if I can.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 1:39 pm 
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Hello,

I am due to start subs on May 11th and also have two young tots to care for so I can really relate to trying to function through withdrawals. I have tried to go cold turkey and made it through the worst withdrawls only to have PAWS come around and bite me hard. I relapsed about a month in both times I tried. Tapering didn't work either so the way I see it suboxone could very well save my life. I was prescribed oxys a year ago to treat a very painful back condition called spinal stenosis but have become very addicted to my meds like many other people.

Thing is, a lot of people I've asked how long should I stay on make some very good points about why a short detox from sub isn't such a great idea (although you have to do what works for you) A month or two on sub generally isn't really enough time to recover from active addiction. While on sub I plan to get into aftercare. A therapist to help me with the underlying issues that led me to self-medicate to begin with and also plan on going to NA meetings. I plan on staying on it awhile, at least long enough to get out of my addict habits and learn some coping skills so that when and if I do stop sub I will have some clean time under my belt and will have addressed the abuse I suffered as a child and the depression thats always plagued me along with a number of other issues. Although I understand wanting to be off drugs completely, thats ideal, the reality of it might be a different story. I'm just saying you should keep an open mind. If once your off subs you start to think maybe it was too soon then talk to your doctor about continuing sub and get into some kind of aftercare if you haven't already. That's just my 2 cents for what its worth. Don't feel like you are under a specific timeline. Your doctor might mean well but opiate addiction is complex and there should be no set schedule on how long you need sub treatment nor should you feel bad if you need to continue sub therapy.

I wish you all the best and as a mother myself, I know how bad you want to be drug free for your kids but at the same time if sub helps you live a normal life and your kids have a healthy happy mama then thats success all in itself. Better to be on sub and do well then to struggle and be miserable trying to meet a doctors ideal of how long you should stay on sub. If you do fine without sub then thats awesome but don't suffer needlessly if after your done tapering you feel like it was too soon to stop. Best of luck and keep us posted.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 1:54 pm 
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Hi lindscnn,

I'm still on suboxone after 16 months and plan to be for the long-haul. I can, however, tell you from reading many threads on this forum, that a lot of people have quit suboxone without extended misery.

The key is to get your dosage down very low and to taper down very slowly over a period of months. Since you've only been on it for a month, I can't tell you what to expect, but I would encourage you to taper down as slowly and for as long as you can. A tell-tale sign of withdrawals is your pupils. Although I've heard sneezing might be a clue, with colds prevalent in your household your pupils will be a better indicator. Dilated pupils will help tell you when you're in withdrawals. But I would caution you about paying too much attention to looking for withdrawal symptoms. You don't want to experience something simply because you expect to. So relax and taper slowly. Good luck and keep us posted as to how you're doing.

Oh, and I second the words of free bird. Well said!

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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 2:52 pm 
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Why do people put hell and suboxone in the same sentence? I've seen it numerous times and I don't get it. If tapered properly its like a mild cold.


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PostPosted: Wed May 05, 2010 3:27 pm 
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I am currently on house arrest and did not sleep at all last night so I am saturating the cyberwaves. I am hearing and fully believing that the proper taper down to a microdose is the key to a gentler jump. The doc said that the drug chiefly used before sub (in my case methadone) is also a big factor particularly if it is one with a long half-life. I expected a rough ride and I got one. Wanting to "get back to who I was" has also been a challenge because after 5 years oxys, 5 years methadone and 1 year suboxone I suspect I might have a distorted memory. When I started my methadone taper over 2 years ago my doctor recommended and eventually prescribed 5mg. valium daily and I took it right until I jumped 9 months ago. It is now evident that I might have been hooked on that as well which might have contributed to PAWS.
I recall thinking what a miracle sub was at first but had been suffering severe stomach pains and constipation for years and I had to get opiate-free at any cost. I also had been regretting my dwindling sexual response and was determined to be clean and sober. These issues are now fully corrected and I am so happy about that. I am about 80% recovered from the insomnia/fatigue issues and am improving weekly. I am hoping my story can help someone who might be losing hope through an unexpectedly long withdrawal. Permanent damage was a fear that plagued me and it turned out to be unfounded. My sanity and comfort are almost fully restored.


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