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PostPosted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:17 pm 
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Hey! Good to hear you're pushing through your anxiety. I have also had anxiety and panic attacks since I was 13. Its definitely not fun! Though for me I completely forgot about them while on opiates and subs. They put a cloud over my head, so I didn't much care about anything. Anyway!! I got decent sleep last night and feel decent today besides lack of energy! I know you're going to come out of this so soon. I can feel it lifting each day. How's your RLS? anyway, keep us posted! I've been listening to Macklemore and Jason Reeves a lot. Both great artists!


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 Post subject: Day 9
PostPosted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:31 pm 
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Today I have had like 0 motivation. I kinda have this dull feeling in my head, don't like it. My stomach is still pretty messed up, but I am still pushing through and praying for the better days I know are coming. It just takes time for the pathways in the mind to heal. My RLS has been ok for the past couple days actually. I just feel really run down, thats gotta be normal considering what my body has been dealing with for several days now. Plus being on my period to top it off. Still having wds but they seem a lil better. They are kinda worse at times then fade a little then come back and so on. It is just gonna take time. I am still alive and pushing through this so thats the important things. Another day tomorrow..... I hope everyone is doing well and hanging in there!


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 5:55 am 
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Please keep posting. I'm following this thread as well as probably many others "out there" who have not joined the forum yet (I joined ystrdy).
I'm on a long slow taper and am at 2mg./day now.....from 8mg./day for 8 or 9 months?

Edit: Unfortunately, WD'S are not an option for me. I'm 50 y/o & work manual labor very closely (side by side) w/my boss who has no idea of my past opiate use & current Sub. use. Also, taking time off work is not an option. I would be replaced were I to take 2-3 days off. I'm also on Klonipin... 1mg./day, at night for sleep.
My story is too long,...AA/ sober 10 years/relapse/home foreclosure/unemployment/ bankruptsy/ now living alone w/o wife & daughter (my choice) as my wifes' spending ruined my life....so I'll just hang in the sideline's , looking forward to hearing of YOUR progress/recovery.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 6:23 am 
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musiclover wrote:
I can tell you that my husband did not WD all throughout Day 10. He's done. !


Hey musiclover,
Can you elaborate on your husband?
Age? How long on Sub's/dosage? What taper? What mil. did he jump?

WD's?
Quote:
"..did not WD all throughout Day 10. He's done"???
= I'm having difficulty understanding EXACTLY what you mean by that statement?

Yet I see in another thread you state:
Quote:
My husband has been off of them for 9 & a half days and feels just as badly


I'm confused? :?


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 Post subject: jonny Hello! Day 10
PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 9:24 am 
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Well it is day 10 for me, still having the sweats, stomach seems a lil better but I won't get ahead of myself, this day just got started..... jonny I can honestly tell you at this point in my own wds I could not imagine working a hard labor job, but thats just me, a lot of people have worked through-out their wds and said it actually helped them in some ways. I have been taking walks everyday and doing some house cleaning each day, but thats about it for me. Other than those little things I have been wiped out. I am on my period though and it always brings me way down. You Luckily don't have to worry about that lol! I would suggest you keeping on tapering down as low as you can for however long it takes because I have noticed the length of use has'nt been making much difference with many people as far as wds. I would think if you could get your dose way lower than I was able to before you jump it will help you a lot since you have to be at work. That is just gonna have to be up to you. I do wish you the very best. My body is probably the age of 50 after three child births, multiple miscarriages through the years, surgeries, kidney failure etc... I have been through the ringer and also put my own self through the ringer with opiate abuse. Once I get better I have a lot of catching up to do to get myself healthy again. It is gonna take some time for me. I have accepted that. The wds are easier mine peaked on day 5, so It is definately better now than then, but not quite there yet. Just gotta keep going!


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 9:46 am 
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Quote:
I would suggest you keeping on tapering down as low as you can for however long it takes because I have noticed the length of use has'nt been making much difference with many people as far as wds. I would think if you could get your dose way lower than I was able to before you jump it will help you a lot since you have to be at work.


That is EXACTLY what I plan on doing...."as low as I can for however long".
I have enough supply to last 6 months if need be...a full box of 30 8mg.'s, plus the one's I've already cut up into 1/2, 1, 2 mg. strips.
I'm also following Charley's thread ( tried to post link here, however I'm not allowed yet ), as he has some advice I think may help me in the long run....see "So far so good".

Thanks!
jon


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 11:03 am 
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Hey Johnny! Welcome! Sorry, I guess I should've gone back and elaborated a bit for those out there reading. My husband is a 26 year old man who also works very hard manual labor 8-14 hours a day. He was down to a .25mg dosage once a day. Day 9 he felt crappy, but we came to find he had a horrible cold/sinus infection. As far as WD symptoms, he did not have them past Day 10. He says his stomach is still a little iffy. But I can tell you he's sleeping great, eating great and had motivation.

Day 10 for me and I didn't sleep well. RLS is for some reason standing its ground for me and its been 6 nights of it. However during the day I feel great. Maybe, I feel I should be getting more sleep because while on opiated and suboxone I could sleep 10 hours and still be exhausted! While now I toss and turn for 9 and am wide awake. (Maybe sleeping 4)

Anyway hang in there, Johnny! My husband was very nervous with his highly active job as well. It actually helped him push through being so active during the day.


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 Post subject: Day 10 so far!
PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 2:00 pm 
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I am just feeling really run down. Still yawning, sweating, hot cold, hot cold, I have got a terrible headache. Yesterday it just felt dull today it hurts. Not sure if thats normal or not. My Blood Pressure is runnin high especially considering it usually runs on the low end. Normal bps for me are usually 100/65 Today it is 131/93 so that could be the reason for my headache. I took a half a clonidine earlier so maybe that will help. I have also been getting blurry vision off n on. Not sure whay thats happening either.... I'm still pushing through though. One plus is that so far today I have'nt had to take any imodium, my stomach seems to be settling down some so thats great, gives me Hope because I really need my appetite back. I'm already too skinny. I know if I could eat more it would help build me back up and maybe help with my energy level too. Another day going through it, another day closer to the light at the end of this tunnel! Hope everyone is doing good today..... Will update later!


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 2:41 pm 
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Thanks musiclover,
I don't wanna "steal the thunder" from the OP of this thread, however, I wanted your husband's W/D's cleared up as we both have very active jobs & cannot STOP work. Gotta keep pushin' on. While on 2mg./day still, a few days ago about 4pm I felt like I hit a wall. All of a sudden , no energy, light-headed and felt like you feel when you haven't eaten in a long while. I came home, stuffed my face & did feel better. So idk what that was all about?
I hope I fair as wel as your husband. I am scared to death to jump....then at work have some terible w/d's hit me! I plan on keeping a 1mg. or less on me at all times when the jump happens for that reason (this is sort of touched on in Charley's thread).
As for Thegreatestislove, keep the posts comin'! I'm rootin' for ya! Soon I will be in your shoes
Thanks again,
jon


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 3:51 pm 
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I just do not have time for these wds anymore. I have a life, I really want to live it. I'm angry today because I just feel that this is going to go on for months and months and I do not have time for that! I think this is why so many people get so angry at Suboxone and the Dr's who LIE and say oh only five to seven days and you should be fine. Such BS. I hate to feel this way. I Like keeping things on the positive. I'm just not feeling very positive about things right now. My husband and our friends and the kids are all going fourwheeler riding. Sure wish I could go too, but my head is throbbing and My vision is blurry and I have no clue what may happen if I did try to go. I just know I can handle a few more weeks of this but there is no way I have time for months of it. My kids will go back to school in a couple months. My sons b-day Is in a few days. I am the person who takes care of all of that. School clothes, driving them to school. This will be my youngest sons pre-school year. I cannot miss any of that. I have a LIFE. I know everyone else does too, but I am feeling a LOT of pressure today. I have sooo much to do. To see people say this takes months to get through. Ugghh! Today is not a good one for me. Sorry to be complaining.... This is the reality of it though and how I feel right now. I am just speaking my mind and how I feel today.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 4:16 pm 
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Thegreatestlove, I can so understand where you are coming from. It has been almost a month of no suboxone for me, and I still don't feel myself. I have a full life with a 6 year old, and there are things that just NEED to be done around this house!! However, I do feel so much better than I did 2 or 3 weeks ago. My sleep is still pretty awful, and that frustrates me. For me, there is no turning back unless the cravings get so bad that I think I may use. So I have to just push through this, and know that it will get better eventually. I found that withdrawal came in waves for me - I would have a good day, then a really bad day. It has evened out now, so I don't have those horrible days. Try to just hang on a little while longer, and someday we will be back to the body chemistry that God gave us!


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 4:28 pm 
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I appreciate the post. I am just having a bad moment. Just feeling a LOT of pressure today! I am hanging, I refuse to give up now. It's just frustrating is all...


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 6:05 pm 
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Yes, it's frustrating! Did you see my post about my temper? That hasn't gotten any better. I am mad at the world. Mad at myself. Mad at suboxone. I just hope that time evens all of this out. But I'm right there with you.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 10:20 pm 
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Hey Johnny, welcome and we're glad to have you with us!!! We had a member on here a while back who quit Suboxone from 2mg and never missed a day of work.....he was a lumberjack!! He felt shitty during his wd, but didn't miss work. But then again, I think he was 26 or 27? Anyhoo, I'm sure if you taper your dose down nice and low you'll have an easy go of it wd wise. I have yet to see anyone on this forum who tapered low (.25mg per day or less) get hit with any kind of serious wd.

Thegreatestislove, I understand you're feeling a lot of pressure today. Now that you don't have that cushion of Suboxone between you and reality, reality is a bit hard to navigate. Like Freedom, my initial coping mechanism was my temper. It's things like these that made recovery so helpful to me. Recovery, to me, is all about learning how to live without drugs. Oh Yeah, high blood pressure is pretty common during opiate wd. Just wanted you to know.

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 Post subject: Day 11 Early morning!
PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 8:09 am 
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I have been awake since 3am. Just layed in bed till daylight. Still sweating, yawning, call me sneezy, chills not quite as horrid, but still sweating like crazy. Stomach is better. Anxiety on high. :shock: Just muddling through this beast.... It is another day though and I am still hanging.

I do agree Romeo, I have accepted that I will never feel the way I did with the cushion of opiates in my life. I accepted that days ago, It will be a NEW NORMAL eventually once these wds leave me alone. I can remember how I felt before the opiates, kinda in certain ways. Like realizing I have always had a lil rls, little things like that. This morning I was thinking about how I felt when I was pregnant and all the symptoms that came with that for me, some very un-pleasant and I made it through it three times. My addiction to opiates started after I had Conner my youngest son. He is 5 so thats a good while, not as long as many many others I know, but still seems long to me. I had a tough pregnancy with Him then after I had him I had surgery tubal ligation. Then my kidneys failed, Have NO idea to this day what caused it. Doctor said my blood pressure just went way too high and they could'nt handle it (my Kidneys). So I was in the hospital for a while un-able to even hold my baby. I had some pretty wicked depression hit me after I got out of the hospital thus the opiates because at that time they seemed to make things so much easier, but we all know that road that ends up going DOWN! I would say I handled my addiction pretty well for like 2 years the last one All went to crappola... Thus the suboxone. I never had the courage to stick a needle in my arm, I never did heroin. Just pain pills orally. I have always been just scared enough to keep myself from going any farther than I did. Thank God! It's another day I am alive, I thank God for that. Thanks for my wonderful kids, and Partner even though He can piss me off in .1sec to the point I wanna throw shit. LOL! He has hung on, He tried to let go, but could'nt. Thankful for that! He says He just wants the normal cranky ole me back haha! Na, I'm usually a bubbly type person, Love to laugh. Have a kinda sick twisted Humor about myself that I actually think is funny myself. Lot of people don't get it, to that I say, whoosh...over the head she flew.

Yesterday the emotions ran on high, I figure that will go on for a long while now n thats ok. I watched Americas got Talent, I used to think gosh this crap is stupid, yesterday I caught myself smiling and crying watching it. Weird! Anyway, day 11 we will see where this one takes me....


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:40 am 
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I'm still here, following your progress. You are doing great!
Perseverance is paramount! (easy for me to say as I'm still on my taper & have yet to jump)

You are not alone in this struggle. We are all in this together.

Soon.... more likely "later", I will be counting the days after my jump. But, I'm taking Romeo's advice and cutting those PITA strips as small as I can to prolong the taper for hopefully an "easier way out". If I feel like crap and my taper interferes w/my work, I may have to bump back up slightly? This is gonna be a long slow process for me.
I wish I had the 2mg. strips....much easier to cut smaller, but I have NOT TOLD my Dr. I'm doing this, as if I am ultimately unable to jump COMPLETELY, I'll still need my 'script intact....but taking much lower doses. And, having no insurance, I have to PAY maximal CASH for EVERY Dr.s visit. (not a co-pay)

Please, Keep the updates a'comin'. Talking about it here helps not only YOU, but all of us!!!!
I wish you nothing but w/d-free symptoms sooner, rather than later!


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 2:41 pm 
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Thought I would share this, I made myself go for a ride a lil while ago. WOW it is amazing how much different EVERYTHING looks. The scenery is sooo much more clear. On all these old roads I have been up and down thousands of times in my life. I have lived here in MS all my life except for a very brief time I stayed with Lee in South Florida. Other than that I have been right here all my life and I did NOT realize the fog the opiates subs and all had put over my eyes till today. I guess I have gradually become used to the differences here at home, but to get out and just look at things was so thrilling, Although my anxiety is the worst it has been today, I just made myself get out for a while. It does help a LOT to push yourself and go somewhere. I blasted my music again today lol. Got some great BOSE speakers in my Altima. lol! Music is clearer for sure, I was listening to Cure Yourself full blast. He screams through a lot of the song and I guess that let some of my Rage loose. I love it when He says, When you gonna wake up and FIGHT for yourself! Anyhow just thought I would share that.

Wds still going but definately better. So glad my stomach finally eased. I was actually craving Applejacks this am. Had my Dad bring me a great big box. Also, I have been alternating the water and gatorade and that really makes me urinate a LOT for some reason, but thats good because I feel the more I go the more I am cleaning out my system.

At this point the worst of my wds are this weird feeling I have in my head that sometimes turns into a headache, the sweats, stinky sweats too yuck! And the anxiety and feeling that I have to push myself to do anything. Other than those things I am doing ok. I am starting to notice some pretty bad side effects from the clonidine now that my wds have let up some and I don't like them, but when it becomes over-whelming clonidine is definately better than nothing. I only take half a tablet now and then at this point. I hope everyone is doing well.... Keep pushing, I am definately walking through this deep mud just gotta pick up one foot and put it in front of the other and each step seems easier as you go along. Then you may feel wiped out for a while, then get up and do it again. Thats what I am doing anyhow.....


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:44 pm 
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the greatest,

im so glad to hear your wds let up somewhat, and that your able to enjoy music and the beauty in life now. Thats something i have missed for awhile now. Not that i dont enjoy those things, but sub does seem to dull things a bit, at least for me anyway.


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 Post subject: Day 12, Early!
PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 7:38 am 
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Sleep is still a lil hard, but I did sleep longer last night than I have been. Woke at 6am. Another day... Yesterday afternoon I pushed myself pretty hard and did ok with it. Did have to take advil for aches especially between my shoulders. I had a herniated disc there a few years ago so it could just be pain from that or something to do with wds I am really not sure BUT I did get about two hours while I was doing basically everything that needed to be done here that I actually got to see a glimmer of what this is going to be like for me once I get through all the wds and that gave me a LOT of HOPE! I am now convinced that I will be fine once these wds that are now coming and going leave me alone. My stomach still is'nt sure if it wants to make me run to the bathroom or just walk. LOL! Day 12 though and I am still hanging in.... Things seem to be improving so the harder times seem easier because I feel progress now.

Got my emotions on full force, sometimes I like it, sometimes it kinda freaks me out a lil. Like Romeo said though, gotta re-learn life without the haze or cushion of opiates. We will see how this day goes.... I hope everyone is doing well. :)


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 Post subject: Day 13 wds still going!
PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 7:31 am 
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Worst morning I have had to this point. My stomach is all messed up and it cramps burns and hurts badly at times. It does ease then comes back again. Still sweating, anxiety still bad. Sleep is crazy, but at least I am having dreams now when I do get some sleep. Just riding this rollercoaster of ups n downs. Part of the deal, Just have to keep pushing and remembering it will eventually get better. Another day.... Hope everyone is hangin in!


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