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PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2015 1:36 am 
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i'm 19 years old, will be 20 in december. have had anxiety and depression ever since i can remember, dating back to elementary school. when i discovered opiates when i was 15, they were a godsend. everything was different in life and it was amazing. i used until i was 17, and now have been opiate free (excluding a couple of slips, damn oxy) for almost 3 years with the help of buprenorphine. bupe has been essential in keeping me clean.

this past 6 months and year in general, my depression and especially anxiety has become terrible, almost unbearable. contemplated suicide on a daily basis. my doctor and i are currently conducting trial and errors with different medications, raising and lowering my bupe, counseling, diet and exercise improvement, etc etc. recently while thinking about all of these efforts in trying to subdue the anxiety, a thought popped in my mind to research adhd. i have had massive trouble with my focus throughout my years in school, especially middle school, high school, and college. not to mention the past year at work and even before this year at work. i know that adhd when untreated can cause major anxiety and depression and so i thought, let me research it a little bit just so i can rule it out. well it turns out after reading all the symptoms and taking those quizzes, i WOULD NOT BE SURPRISED IF IN FACT I DID HAVE ADHD. i read a lot of the symptoms, and i say to myself "man, that sounds just like me." i read a lot of the symptoms and say to myself "man, that explains why i was so terrible in school and why i'm not in college right now." it would explain a lot.... it could be a huge reason for the anxiety that drove me to experiment with drugs and that drove me to love opiates. it could be a huge reason for the social angst i've felt all my life. it could be a huge reason for why i just can't seem to get in and stay in a groove at work.

my mom and i are going to get me a full psychological evaluation to test me for it. i'm worried about something tho. if i do in fact have it, i'm worried that my doc will think it's a ploy to get amphetamines and that i just want something to abuse. first of all, i dabbled a couple times with amps in high school during my experimentation days, and never really understood why they were abused. like i remember thinking "this is a high?". i damn sure felt like i was finally able to focus and be calm, but that was it. i never really revisited taking them because i was so in love with opiates. that brings me to my second point: i am a full fledged OPIATE ADDICT, when i want to get high, i go after the exact opposite of what amphetamines do. in one of our past conversations about my anxiety and depression, i just kind of out of curiosity (and having heard once or twice that they're sometimes prescribed for anx/depres) asked him if "adderall or vyvanse have any success in treating anxiety" and he said "they make it much worse." but my thing is, if i do have adhd, don't you think that is what is causing a lot of my anxiety and has been since childhood...? i truly would want them to relieve my adhd and anxiety from adhd, not to abuse them. i seriously only took them about 3 or 4 times in high school, and haven't taken em since. it's been about 4 years. i'm worried i won't be taken seriously. any advice fellow bupers? anyone else ever been diagnosed with adhd while in recovery and/or while on buprenorphine?


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2015 10:41 pm 
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Hi! I know that there have been members here who have ADHD along with their opiate addiction. By the way, I just wanted to mention in case you didn't know, buprenorphine, the main ingredient in suboxone, is a synthetic opiate. So you're not actually opiate-free per se, but your addiction is in remission while you're taking it correctly.

So I know at least one person who is on suboxone and an ADHD medication. I don't know what your doctor will think. I hope he or she is open-minded enough to consider putting you on ADHD medication. If your psych eval. includes a diagnosis of ADHD it should be treated! I'm very sorry you've had such struggles with depression and anxiety. I'm very sure that you would leave many many broken hearts and lives if you followed through with a suicide attempt. Please reach out if you feel on the verge! I hope that you get some help with all of this!

Amy

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2015 2:29 am 
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thank you for your support and all your work on this forum. the more and more i think and read about it, the more i realize how many symptoms of adhd are present in my daily life and were present throughout my 18 years of school (including some college, which i quit a couple semesters ago cause i could never get myself to do any of the work). these symptoms are effecting my work and my well being every day. i feel like a diagnosis and subsequent treatment of adhd could be very liberating. i've been feeling very lost and a lot of times hopeless while trying to treat this damn anxiety/depression, not ever really getting a grasp at why i'm this way. a diagnosis of adhd would explain so much. it's weird that a person COULD want to be diagnosed with something, but in this case it would just be such a relief. the fact that i can't get to the bottom of this anxiety/depression IS CAUSING MORE ANXIETY/DEPRESSION.... sorry for the rant.

i just know even if i am diagnosed, it's gonna be much harder for a person with a history of drug abuse to get the proper medicine. i don't even care about amphetamines and any high they may give! ah, i'm stressing before anything has even happened! anymore advice people? anyone out there who got diagnosed with adhd while on bupe... how did you handle getting treatment for it? was your bupe doctor hesitant or supportive?


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 7:50 pm 
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hey subisamiracle,

nice username btw ;). i believe suboxone is a miracle too.

after many many years of trying to get on stimulants i am finally on them. this happened about a year after starting suboxone. i saw a nurse practitioner who told me one she would prescribe them a year after being in suboxone and clean. then i had my insurance switched and my new nurse practitioner prescribed them to me (at thatpoint i was clean for six months but she knew about my suboxone). before asking my psychiatrist np for the stimulants i spoke at length with my therapist at the suboxone clinic as well as my suboxone doctor about my self diagnosed add and asked them if it would be ok to be on suboxone and stimulants. they said yes, they commented everyone is different and some addicts can handle it and some cant handle taking stimulants.

keep in mind you have a right to receive medical treatment for all your conditions. when the risks outweigh the benefits then you are not supposed to follow a treatment. the risk to prescribing stimukants to addicts outweigh the benefits when the addict abuses them. the flip side is that the risks of NOT prescribing outweigh the benefits of not receiving stimulants when the addict is able to take the medication responsibly. so if you can benefit from stimulants and are an addict and are able to take them responsbily then it is a risk not to take them! hows that for philosophy? afterall, the warning on the stimukants says prescribe with caution to addicts, not that addicts are not eligible for stimukant thrrapy.

a high percentage of addicts also have add. its quite common. in fact, ive read that some even self medicated for their add by drug use.

if your psych is against stiumlants for you, then you have a right to seek another opinion. after getting on suboxone i saw a psychiatrist who refused to prescribe me stimukants after i made a sincere attempt at guanfacien, and then i saw that one np who told me the one year thing and i thought that made sense and i was happy i found someone who would potentially prescribe so i stuck with her. btw, she never said she gauranteed it either.

if you feel you have add then you have to be a self advocate but also honestly talk with health professionals who you think are smart and understand psychology. i actually trusted my sub clinic more on this issue because of their experience with addiciton than the psychiatrists. the only thing they said was that they would not prescribe it to me, that i would have to see a psychiatrist or nurse practitioner for that. even when my insurance switched which caused me to be unable to see my psychiatrist (the np) for a couple months and i told my sub doc about that the doctor told me not to worry that the doctor would write a letter to my general practitioner to prescribe me my psych meds (lithium in addition to the stimukant). the letter was indeed written because when i saw my general practitioner she said shed receieved the letter and had no issye prescribing me the stimukant. i was impressed my sub clinic took so much interest in ensuring continuity of treatment for me!

i think it also helps that my sub clinic trusts me and know i want to succeed in life real badly. the nurse even told me that they dont usually do the things they do with me with most of their patients like give refills and other stuff i cant remember right now, it doesnt matter anyways.

if you do wind do abusing them then you will know that you tried and it didnt work. it will become apparent to those around you that you are abusing them too. i warned my parents when i still lived with them and started stimulants that i was starting them so that in case i did spiral out of control there would be someone to put on the brakes, in addition to my therapist.

i think its ridiculous to deny appropriate treatment because of this fear of risks outweighing benefits. there are risks afterall to not being on stimukants, hah. my room is always clean now, i can read books again (one time i read "the silent scream" in 4 days!... gotta brag!), i dont have this annoying impulse to interrupt people anymore (or at least i am able to hold it in!). best of all, i am able to behave in more age-appropriate ways because i dont make these dumb jokes which only i seem to find funny. my psych said its cause of better impulse control, so better impulse control = not acting like a freak! hah.

good luck, i used to read other peoples experiences on stimulants and get very jealous reading about their life imrpovements. i hope this doesnt make you jealous but inspires you to take action! i was a highly anxious person with many thoughts at once throughout my teens and early twenties so i also thought it was anxiety. then when i started suboxone and the drug abuse and drama and insanity lifted i still had the issues with focus... if anything in some ways it felt worse because i stopped smoking weed to self medicate for it (i smoked it like once or tiwce a month with these friends who are potheads, totally different ecperience when you smoke it rarely!) . i realized that my concentration issues, social interaction focus and age appropriate reactions, as well as procrastination (well that is still there but not as bad!), was not anxiety related.

ok, i am at the airport sitting in uncomfortable chairs and writing in an ipad so excuse my mistypes. good luck!

I wonder what Dr. Junig's thoughts are on treating add with stimukants... if anyone has any links please let me know. just curious what his professional opinion is.

wow this is a long response but as you can see this is a topic which is near to my heart because if you suffer from add being able to think with clarity and feel lighter and unberdened by sluggishness and the tiresome effects of a brain which is constantly firing (well id be dead it wasnt! you all surely know what i mean!) is tremendous relief. even if youre not aware of it if you are like me and have my kind of add, "innattentive", your brain IS constantly thinking even if you dont know if because when i take my med I feel less overwhenled. it is exhausting being add. i wish so bad i hadnt self medicated with marijuana throughojt college and had taken this instead of the weed. unlike weed thought stimukants will not take away your motivation! wow to think of how i would do habing stiumalnts.

my only concern is that when i skip days or before i take it i almost feel brain damaged when i read. ive been on ir for a year and my psych nurse reassures me it doesnt cause brain damage, so ya its just the difference between my add brain on and off stims is so marked. i think, i may be wrong, that add is also a form of brain damage itself (or it can be)...


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 13, 2016 9:37 pm 
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Hi - I may not be of much help since I am in the same boat as you are.....

I started sub the 1st of December - 8mg strip 3x day but my next appt we are going to start tapering down to 2 x day - which I think is good. Some days it helps my mood tremendously but I seem to have bad days also. I had ankle surgery the 14th of december so that may play a part since I'm still in some pain now and then, I tend to do too much and not take it easy then it catches up with me and I'm down a day or two.

Anyways - I hear you on the anxiety and depression part. I struggle with both also and I also have trouble focusing anymore on anything. My mind is so scattered - my husband and friends have noticed also and have called me out saying I'm scattered. My mood can switch in one second - I can't stand it. I snap because I feel like my brain has so much going on and I just can't handle it. This is how I am when I'm not using and that's the only part I can't stand. I'm going to talk to my doc when I go but I'm sure this is something I will need to discuss once I get into the psych doc. I didn't really think ADHD but I'm sure it's a possibility with me also. Let me know how it goes with you. I'll try to update you as well.

LPP


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PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2016 9:17 am 
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Medshop, you can not sell drugs on this recovery site. You will be deleted and banned without warning..

Peddle your crap elsewhere. ..bye bye..


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PostPosted: Sun May 08, 2016 3:34 pm 
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Welcome to the forum. If you really think you have add then meds can help tremendously. My doc told me I needed to be a year in recovery though. So a year after getting on subs I got on adderall. I stopped taking adderall a year later because I felt it wasn't help me anymore. I can still focus much much better than before the adderall. It's like my brain learned to think again or something. Sure I could still benefit from it but I moved to another country and all there is available here is Ritalin and Vyvanse which neither I want to take. There is a theory out there (keep in mind that it's just a theory) that after about a year stimulants dont really work as well anymore BUT and the BIG "but" is that they do help you learn to think. You form a bunch of new connections. I noticed a year in that I could read much faster on them but that I was no longer helplessly distracted with everything. Sure I still can't do certain things without them (like service type work where you need to multitask) but I'd rather stay away from things which make me need the use of stimulants to function. Just my thoughts here. Good luck!


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PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2016 6:39 pm 
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ADHD and opioid dependence are often co morbid conditions. After stabilizing on suboxone, my doc put me back on stimulants after I complained of classic ADD symptoms and because I was on stims in high school. As long as I don't fail any more cocaine drug tests he is allowing me to stay on it under close weekly supervision. If your doc won't treat you for ADHD due to concerns over stimulant misuse, discuss vyvanse as a possible option. It can't be snorted and in my experience, it's so strong (I'm on 50mg which my doc said is a moderate high dose) that I have no desire to ever take more than I'm supposed to. Even having misused stims in the past , under close supervision I am successfully taking a stim as prescribed.


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