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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 11:29 am 
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Hi, my name's B and I'm 25 years old. I just want to start off by saying what a great site this is and how much it has helped me. I guess I'll start from the beginning. As a teen, I dabbled in drugs here and there. I never thought I'd be addicted to anything. My friends were always the ones who took it to the next level while I was the one saying "you guys are stupid, I'd never do that." By the time I was 20 or so, I met a girl (story of our lives, right men?) And we tried taking perc 30s together. We started off by splitting one and feeling fantastic, like superman. I'm sure I don't have to explain that feeling. Anyways, before I knew it, we were spending all of our money on pills trying to chase that feeling every day. Long story short, we broke up and I moved out of state with my sister for a few months. I'm around 22 at this time, and I quit doing pills altogether with no problem. After a few months of living in west Palm florida, I got homesick and moved back to ohio. The day after I got back, I hung out with my ex and believe it or not, did some pills. It didn't take long and I was back in my old ways. It progressed to smoking heroin every day (never shot anything in my veins) and we broke up again. I was still doing H every day, doing odd jobs to make money while living with my mother. In the midst of this, I met another girl (currently my gf and mother of my child) and things started getting serious. She knew about my drug use and would even use with me once in a while. I loved it at the time. We got fed up with living in my mother's house, so I got a job and started taking suboxone(I never had a prescription for subs, just bought them off the street) after a few months, we saved up money and moved into our own place. Around this time we found out she was pregnant. She quit doing drugs the moment she found out. She never went through WDs. I kept my job for a little over a year, all while taking subs every day. I got laid off and money wad tight. I tried quiting cold turkey a handful of times, but by day 3 or 4 I felt terrible and would give in. Then I stumbled across thsee forums and read about tapering. Just a few weeks ago, my gf threatened to kick me out and not let me see my daughter. I knew then and there that I needed to make a change. I am currently taking .75mgs of suboxone a day and am dropping by .25 every 4 days. I no longer get the "high" or rush from taking it but it does stop the WDs. I honestly can't remember the last time I felt this good. I take my whole dose in the morning and by the end of the day, I just feel tired and worn out. I plan to be completely off of the subs within the next 2 weeks or so. The point of my story is that, tapering is key. Along with diet and exercise. I don't want to say that it's easier than I thought it would be, but it's definitely not as bad as I thought. I'll try to keep my story updated every few days or so. Thank you for taking time to read my life story lol


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 11:43 am 
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Thank you for sharing your story. Boy your girlfriend sure got by good. No withdrawals. But you weren't so lucky. It sounds like you've got your yourself in a good place. You know to taper, and exercise and eat well. Good luck to you during your taper. And welcome to the forum. :D Keep us posted on how it's going. Bama girl


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 2:51 pm 
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Thank you for the welcome Bama girl! And I was wondering if it's just me, or does anyone else feel awful after taking a nap on subs? Almost as like it all left your body while you were sleeping lol


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 4:15 pm 
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Hey noob, great post.
Good luck with your taper. Slow and low wins the race.
Get down to at least .25 and take that for a few weeks, then jump. It's easy.... Don't rush it though. I can help answer any questions you run into during your taper. My taper was a complete success with minimal withdrawal.
good luck and God speed.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 4:18 pm 
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Hi B, Welcome! I hope it continues to go well for you and that you will keep posting so we can follow along on your taper. I always feel really good after a nap. Especially, when I do it like this...I take 2mgs at 5am and go back to bed until 6:30. I wake up feeling great and ready to start the day. I get in from work at about five. I take my second dose of 2mgs and try to take a twenty to thirty minute nap. I get up ready to go!I have a part time job and head out to work. I usually get home at about 9 and am in bed by 11. It works for me. Now, of course, I have a husband and a very needy cat that can interrupt my plan! lol But, for the most part it works! Please keep us posted on your taper, I will be praying that it continues to go well!


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 4:58 pm 
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Thanks ghost. Yeah, I've noticed that attitude makes all the difference in how I feel, leading me to believe that most of the addiction is all mental. But I do plan on taking it slow. Every 4 days seems to work for me. I don't feel physically bad other than small aches here and there but nothing too much to handle. And my outgoing attitude is coming back, slowly but surely. I used to be a people person. I could walk into a party full of strangers and converse with all of them. Being on drugs turned me into a hermit, never wanting to go out to eat, never wanted to do anything unless it involved drugs. But anyways, thanks for the support. It's awesome to know strangers can help more than they know


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 6:50 pm 
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We're here for you!

If you find that every 4 days starts to be very difficult, just slow it down. Many people who have tapered here have tried going at a rapid pace and have ended up having to slow down. Progress is the important part, not winning any races.

If you do have to slow down, let your girlfriend know that this is completely normal. She can come here herself if she needs support.

Noob, you have a lifetime of opiate addiction ahead of you. I would like to tell you it goes away, but it doesn't. If you let your guard down the addiction will rear its ugly head. I wish that were not the case, but this has been scientifically proven over and over again.

My suggestions to you and anyone else tapering off buprenorphine is to do some major recovery work. Getting off bupe may be like 1/10 of the battle. Go to meetings. If you don't like 12 step programs, go to SMART Recovery meetings. Find an addiction counselor/therapist. Figure out your triggers.

Unfortunately, it would have been easier to work on your recovery when you were still on buprenorphine. The cravings can come back fast and furiously. Arm yourself with tools and surround yourself with good, non-using people.

I wish you all the best.

Amy

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 7:48 pm 
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Thanks amy! I've been going to an addiction counselor and she says the same thing. She tells me she has no doubt that I can get off of subs, but her main concern is my "support system" it's all about what I'm doing to change my lifestyle. And I completely understand that. I've never had any reason to be clean, but now I look at my daughter and think to myself that I don't want her to grow up with a "druggie" father. I do fear relapse and I haven't even kicked it yet. But I feel that my desire to be a great father outweighs that fear.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 10:15 pm 
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Just wanted to say that you guys are right about "the slower the better." I feel that I may have dropped to .75 too soon. I felt fine and stable on the 1mg a day. But like I said, after 4 days of that I dropped to .75. The whole day wasn't bad, at all. I felt fine all the way up until I laid down to sleep. My legs are more or less river dancing in bed lol would it be bad to take the other .25mg this late? Or to even take it at all? Should I just suck it up and stay at the .75 or what? I'm torn. I don't want to mess up the taper but I also don't want to move to fast.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 10:19 pm 
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Ya know, I feel like crap when I take a nap now and get back up. It may be because I'm not popping 2 or 4 pain pills as soon as I get up like I used to. But really, I do feel rough when I nap during the day now. Never did b4 when I was in active addiction and had my pills to take though. Oh my, just read your post, "RIVER DANCING?" LOLOL That's a new one. On the real, I'd take a little extra. Stretch that taper out a little longer because it's gonna get worse the lower you go. JMO... Bama girl


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 10:37 pm 
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Thanks bama! Lol and for the river dancing, it was literally the first thing that popped in my head. I think I might take the little .25 piece. I read alot of people saying don't be so hard on yourself, or that it's okay to "take a shortcut" every once in a while. I think that dropping to 1mg a day was a HUGE step for me. I'd like to say how much I was taking a day before that, but to be honest, I have no idea. I'm not prescribed to them (not for lack of trying) so I have to buy them from someone. Around here they go anywhere up to 20 dollars a piece so they get expensive. I get the 8mg strips and cut them. I'd say one used to last me 3 or 4 days so around 2 to 3 mgs a day. But I was also taking them in smaller doses twice, sometimes three times, a day. As you can tell, dropping to 1mg was a huge difference but not so bad WD wise. I don't want to brag or get a big head, but I have a high pain tolerance. I'm not one to give in easily. You could say I'm stubborn lol


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 28, 2016 6:56 pm 
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I really hope that I'm not the only one to slip up on their taper. I took my .75mg this morning and didn't feel good, but it wasn't bad either. I started to feel kind of sick. Just weak, and almost a dizzy kind of feeling. I tried to push through it but I was out and about with my gf and daughter. Baby crying in the back and gf bitching in the front. It all kind of overwhelmed me, as if the sick feeling wasn't enough. I didn't take alot more or anything, probably just about .5mg more. I know that's more than I should've taken, but will it mess up my taper entirely? Would I be able to go ahead and take .75 again tomorrow?


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 29, 2016 1:03 pm 
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Hey Noob, Don't be so hard on yourself! Yes, just pick up where you left off and start again. LOL Let me just make sure I have it right...you are down to .75 mgs once per day? And then yesterday you took an additional .50mgs? Total of 1.25 for the day? Still amazing if you ask me! And, I know I have heard taper stories in which people took .5 one day .75 the next and then back to .5.....if you get what I mean. I can only speak for myself but I would not spend any time being too uncomfortable. That would just lead me to do whatever necessary to take the edge off. I hope I made sense in that explanation! Enjoy the rest of the day! And, give yourself a pat on the back for working on it!


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 30, 2016 1:11 am 
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Yes. I took 1.25 altogether. I mean, I'm still doing way better than I was so I can't be too upset about it. I dropped back down to .75 today and felt fine. I'm starting to realize the slow and low concept lol especially the slow part.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 30, 2016 4:53 am 
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Hi NooB, Yes, very slow! Just take as much time as you need. Otherwise you will be miserable and do something to end the feeling that you will regret! Keep up the good work!


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2016 4:12 pm 
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Hello NooB - I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you.
I noticed you wrote on my thread days ago, and I appreciate it very much.
I am exhausted !
I'm sure you are too.
Low and slow low and slow -----as low low low as you can go and sloooooow -
I bet you can escape withdrawal, you can beat it, but please take your time because every emotion other than physical needs to catch up and agree. Those emotions can take a long time, but no worries, do it for you !
Be well, be happy, be safe !
Just B

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 12:11 pm 
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Hey guys, it's an old thread I know but I am 7 days clean now and made a new thread explaining a little


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 09, 2017 4:26 pm 
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That's great Noob!


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