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PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2012 11:47 am 
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Hi everyone - I'm new to this forum and will be seeing the doctor tomorrow for my first suboxone visit. Since you must be in withdrawl to take your first dose, today isn't going to be an easy one.

A little info about myself:
I'm a 31 yr old mother i was married almost 5 years ago (sober) and so was my husband. We had our issues over the years but no issue bigger than addiction. We had a very close friend that was a pharmacist, they were stealing pills etc and coming over to hang out. Long story short, I had surgery and was prescribed pain meds. I ran out and my "friend" had what I wanted/needed. I've been addicted to pain meds now for close to 4 years.
My addiction had gone from Vicodin 5's to 10's to Percocet and eventually OxyContin. Somehow by the grace of God I got myself off the OxyContin 80s and back down to Vicodin but can't seem to get off completely. For the past year I've been taking between 30 - 40mg of Vicodin. My husband also got involved and became addicted. He was and still is worse off than I ever was. I packed up and left him a week ago because things had gotten too out of control. I want and desperately need a better life so I called a dr about suboxone. I'm hoping that this is the miracle I need to get my life back!

Thanks for reading my post - any input anyone has would be greatly appreciated. This forum is the reason I made that call to the doctor for help. Hardest phone call I've ever made..... Thank you all :)


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2012 9:41 pm 
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Hi, and WELCOME!

You took that first step..and that is VERY MUCH the hardest!! Be PROUD!

I'd ask you to read my story, in this section of the site. It details my addiction, and talks about what I did..and what I did to my wife.

I hate to see a relationship that gets ruined by addiction...but it happens, and you will be a stronger person with a major accomplishment.

It's never easy to take that first step...and I know if I can do it, ANYONE can. I'm about 2 years older than you, wife of 14 years, 3 kids, and we have a baby on the way that'll be born in a couple of weeks.

My marriage almost ended..and you can read about all of that in my story...but we bounced back, and we bounced back stronger than ever! Our marriage is great now, and I love her with ALL of my heart. There's NOTHING that could change my focus now, and I'm more determined than ever...you'll get to that point..and you'll be able to look at your past as tiny bits of strength that gave you the power you have now.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask away. I've been on Suboxone for 4+ years.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2012 11:24 pm 
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WELCOME!!!

good luck at your induction, and it should get easier from here, but it wont be easy all the time,,,,
if that makes any sense at all :D

I hope you stick around, and keep us posted on your recovery,
it always helps to talk about things.

agian, WELCOME!!

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 8:07 am 
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Thank you both for your support!

Johnathanm,
I took the time to read your story and it really has some similarities to my own. The only difference is my husband isn't in a place where he wants to get better and I am. For me to get well, I had to get away. You know what they say, you have to change your environment.... It wasn't an easy decision but still one I knew I needed to make. I can honestly say I don't ever see him & I working things out. There has been too much deceit, lying, and blame.
Congrats to you on the new baby & the return of such a strong marriage!

Amber,
Thank you for the welcome! I'm really hoping things get easier, last night was rough and this morning ever rougher.
Getting the kids up and driving them to school during wd is brutal.... :(
My kids deserve so much better.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 8:56 am 
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Gettingthere wrote:
Thank you both for your support!

Johnathanm,
I took the time to read your story and it really has some similarities to my own. The only difference is my husband isn't in a place where he wants to get better and I am. For me to get well, I had to get away. You know what they say, you have to change your environment.... It wasn't an easy decision but still one I knew I needed to make. I can honestly say I don't ever see him & I working things out. There has been too much deceit, lying, and blame.
Congrats to you on the new baby & the return of such a strong marriage!

Amber,
Thank you for the welcome! I'm really hoping things get easier, last night was rough and this morning ever rougher.
Getting the kids up and driving them to school during wd is brutal.... :(
My kids deserve so much better.



Look at it this way....when you're head hits the pillow tonight, you'll be comfortable! You'll be able to sleep without chills, hot flashes..etc. So another day won't go by that you're in that chase for a high and keeping the WD away.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 9:41 am 
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I'm trying to stay optimistic :)
I can wait until I NEVER feel this way again!!!


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 5:33 pm 
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Just a quick update - I had my first sub appointment today and it went well. He put me on sub films, one 8mg film in the morning & another in the evening. I took one strip around 2:30 and I'm not feeling great but not terrible either. I'm almost feeling jittery.... Hoping that subsides soon.
He also put me on vistaril for sleep.
Fingers crossed!!!

I also wanted to thank you guys again for your support. I'm pretty much going through this on my own so all your comments & suggestions mean a lot!


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 5:39 pm 
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I don't know why he didn't have you take your entire 16mg right in the office..so you would be at or near the ceiling and have all your receptors covered...but you'll DEF feel better when you take that next dose (you do take another 8mg strip today, right?)

BTW, how often do you go see the doctor and get your suboxone?

Did he give you a full month supply? or just a week? Every doc is different, some won't give you a full month until they see how you do on it.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 5:48 pm 
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I'm guessing I'm only supposed to take one dose today & start 2 a day tomorrow. He didn't dispense in the office, he wrote me an Rx for a 2 weeks supply & sent me on my way.
After I see him in 2 weeks he's going to write for a months supply at a time with a goal to be off of the sub in a year if I'm ready.

Now im feeling nauseous and have a killer headache along with feeling jittery. I guess I shouldn't complain too much vs what I could be feeling. Do those symptoms sound "normal"?
I don't really feel as if I got enough info from the dr. They closed at 1:00 and I was the last patient, so they kind of rushed me out.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 6:17 pm 
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Gettingthere wrote:
I'm guessing I'm only supposed to take one dose today & start 2 a day tomorrow. He didn't dispense in the office, he wrote me an Rx for a 2 weeks supply & sent me on my way.
After I see him in 2 weeks he's going to write for a months supply at a time with a goal to be off of the sub in a year if I'm ready.

Now im feeling nauseous and have a killer headache along with feeling jittery. I guess I shouldn't complain too much vs what I could be feeling. Do those symptoms sound "normal"?
I don't really feel as if I got enough info from the dr. They closed at 1:00 and I was the last patient, so they kind of rushed me out.


The headache..well those sometimes come with Suboxone. But the rest of the symptoms...if i had to guess, and this is JUST A GUESS
(disclaimer)
Please don't take what I'm about to say as professional medical advice. I'm NO DOCTOR..but I've been on Suboxone a LONG time, and have a good bit of experience with it, and it's affects.

There..now let's move past that part...

If I had to guess, I'd say you're still in withdrawals. That's the jittery, nauseous feeling that you have right now. And very well could be reason for the headache you've got...I remember when I would sometimes not be able to get my opiates (lortabs, oxys), that I would get a headache.

I would highly suggest taking 1/2 a film right now. Then before bed, take the other 1/2.

Just me..but I would split my dose into 1/2s for a day or two, since you only got 16mg per day to last you 2 weeks, you can't really take any extra, but you can spread your dose out, and take your 16mg of suboxone in 4 dosings a day, 1/2 a strip at a time.

That way you're getting a little bit of suboxone every couple of hours, and you keep your receptors saturated more often..until you build up enough in your system..which could take a day or two on a lower dose.

Suffice it to say MOST doctors do inductions with 24mg of Suboxone, up to 32mg...but the most common is 24..

So 3x a day, 8mg per dose. Or you could take all 24mg at once. You have the ability to spread out your meds as you want, IF it helps.

But I can't really advise you to go against your doctors prescribed dosing technique....but you're welcome to try out different ways of taking it and see how you do.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 8:19 pm 
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I'm not sure about taking more tonight, I'm wondering if what I took could've been too much? I spent an hour sleeping & woke up vomiting.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 8:51 pm 
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Gettingthere wrote:
I'm not sure about taking more tonight, I'm wondering if what I took could've been too much? I spent an hour sleeping & woke up vomiting.


Let me put it this way, because EVERYONE is different when it comes to Suboxone and how it affects a person...everyone's chemistry is different...
So with that, I say this:

Only taking 1 of the 8mg-2mg suboxone films, if going by the most common guideline (but there's not a set guideline), 1 isn't enough. Normally, people take 3 times what you're taking, but in SOME instances, there's a reaction to the naloxone. However rare it may be, it does happen from time to time...

BUT, if I had to guess, I'd say that you're not getting enough, rather than getting too much.

Let's narrow this down a bit...have you ever gone into serious withdrawals from the Roxy? Like, 3-4-5 days where you couldn't get any?

If so, what were the symptoms, exactly? Were they the same as what you're dealing with right now?

What was it like before you took the first suboxone? Did you feel nauseous last night? Jittery?

What i'm getting at, is how much withdrawal were you in, and what did you encounter before this evening when you got that first dose? That way you can judge what the problem is, whether it's too much Sub, or not enough Sub.

8mg is a LOT..but then again 8mg isn't much at all...

It's hard to say.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 9:22 pm 
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Anytime I've been in w/d I'm typically achy, muscle cramps/spasms, cold sweats, and the horrible gastrointestinal issues (not vomiting)
I'm starting to feel a little better now. Vomiting has slowed down & headache is finally gone. I waited the 24 hours before taking the sub but now wondering if it was the pwd I've read about?
I'll be calling the dr in the morning & see what he suggests. As horrible as I felt I'm nervous about taking tomorrows dose :/

I really do appreciate you talking me through this - I have absolutely nobody to call & talk to about what I'm going through. This forum has been a blessing.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2012 11:12 pm 
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It sounds like it is to much. Steve


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2012 10:32 am 
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After all the vomiting passed I felt great & slept even better!
I called the dr this morning & he told me to try 1/2 a strip this morning & see how things go.

I woke up feeling amazing, thank you all for your help - without you guys I would've been lost.

Took my 1/2 about a half hour ago.... So far so good :)


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2012 2:30 pm 
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Gettingthere wrote:
After all the vomiting passed I felt great & slept even better!
I called the dr this morning & he told me to try 1/2 a strip this morning & see how things go.

I woke up feeling amazing, thank you all for your help - without you guys I would've been lost.

Took my 1/2 about a half hour ago.... So far so good :)


It's hard to judge who should take how much when it comes to Suboxone. It's a VERY strong medicine, but it has a bunch of factors that determine how much of it will get you to a level where you are comfortable and feel fine. Just like my doctor said yesterday when I went to him for my 3-month visit, not everyone is the same, and what's good for one might not be good for another.

I'm to a point where my Suboxone levels need to be around 8-12mg a day to feel OK. Now, when it comes to chronic pain, much of which I can attest to arthritis in my knee and pretty bad dental probs, I take a little bit over that 8-12 mg per day to help tolerate the pain. I remember when I first started, I thought I had to have more, more, more...then I figured out that most of what I thought I needed was just anxiety.

I was so dumb back when I first started on it..I remember thinking if I only took 2 suboxone today, and the last one was around 6pm tonight, then by tomorrow morning if I didn't have another one to take, that I would immediately face WD. It wasn't until I realized that I was portraying the same attitude as I portrayed when I was in active addiction that I backed off and started seeing how long I could stretch between my dosage. I even had days when I would get busy and forget to take my suboxone, like literally just forgot all about it. Never had WD or felt bad either...it was just the brain saying "hey, feel bad unless you get more" and my body responding by ultimately feeling bad. I actually remember when I would think I was having chills and such while I was driving to the pharmacy to pick up my meds...
That was back before my insurance, when I was having to pay full-price for Suboxone tablets...and BOY were they high!!

I thought I was going to get my meds at CVS because it was the most easily accessible to my location..but I was BADLY mistaken. I went to CVS once, and got 3 pills. They cost me $31.00 and some change. That's ok, I won't be back here...and i went home and called around. I found that Fred's had the VERY same pill, very same manufacturer, for $6.90.
So I began getting them at Fred's. The pharmacist in there knew me and he was kinda glad to see that I was now doing better, but I could not afford to get much at once, so I was going to Fred's about once/twice a week and buying 8, 10, or sometimes 15 pills...because I couldn't afford any more than that.
And Fred's pharm is closed on Sundays...I can remember when I would make damn sure i had enough to do me till Monday morning..and a couple of times I would take an extra on Sunday night before bed, then I'd get up Monday morning and I would convince myself that I was in withdrawals. Oh I felt SO bad (or told myself I did)...and I remember going to the pharmacy and getting my 5 or 10 pills, and popping one under my tongue in the parking lot...and thinking "whoo, I sure came close"...

Now I look back and think..I didn't have a clue. I was no where NEAR withdrawals only doing without for 10-12 hours. But I sure told myself that I was.
Just goes to show what kind of tricks your brain can convince you of.

Ironically, I had my doctor visit yesterday, and talking about going to get my meds, I just got back from town a little bit ago, from going to Fred's to get my monthly 75 Suboxone strips...

I don't know about you guys, but before I sat down here, I had just finished counting them to make sure I was getting what I should. It's not that I don't trust the pharmacy or people, but the first time I say that I'm short, they'll automagically assume that I'm just another druggie trying to get more than I should...when that's farther from the truth than anything.

In fact, I got a backstock of Suboxone going that I'm just now starting..and I"m going to try and put up as many as I can.

Maybe it's just me, or conspiracy theories from reading too much online, but I think about things like "what if the dollar is devalued and I can't get my medicine" or "what if we are attacked by terrorists again and suddenly we can't get shipments of anything, or meds are cut off.."

I def don't dwell on it or let it consume me, but I do think about the stuff, doesn't hurt to be cautious.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 12, 2012 3:50 pm 
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Well, I'm a few days in and feeling great! I'm taking 4mg in the morning & another 4mg in the evening. This dose seems to be doing the trick! I'm extremely happy about that because it's half of what the dr suggested I start at, which means its going to cost me less & hopefully i will be off of the subs sooner than planned. The only thing that is certain though is its going to cost half of what I had thought each month.

Mentally I seem to be doing well too. No cravings and I'm not thinking about my old habits etc. I've enjoyed the past few days with my kids and I've been rather proud of myself. A week ago I would've snuck off to eat a few pills, not anymore :)
What a world of difference!


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 13, 2012 4:16 am 
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One suggestion since you plan on tapering down rather soon, would be to take the ones that you are prescribed, but aren't taking each day, and put those up as backstock. That way, when you start your taper, you have PLENTY to get through, and can spend up to a month or more on something like .5mg or .25mg. It wouldn't take much to last you a very long time at those extremely low doses...so that's just a thought.

Some people have managed to get down to extremely low levels, but find it very hard to jump off even at those low levels...so it's food for thought to put some back for times like that.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 13, 2012 8:27 am 
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Since the dr prescribed me 8mg twice a day & I'm only taking 4mg twice a day, I had defenitly planned on starting a stock pile for emergencies during my taper.
Thanks for the info & help! I'm sure during my taper I'll have a ton of questions.... Oh the joys of not knowing what the hell I'm doing ;)


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