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PostPosted: Wed Jan 07, 2015 1:52 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jan 06, 2015 5:01 pm
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new here, don't post much anywhere, just a slow day at work, so I'm cruising the internet...took norcos and somas for 15 years, went in and out of 30 day programs, finally got clean after a 9 month stay somewhere in Houston. I had 2 and a half years clean, then it snowed for a couple weeks (you know what I mean), then back to norcos for a couple months, bad stuff started happening again. Wrecked a couple cars, stole, lied, cheated, you know the story...on subs now 1/2 a day (4mg)...browsed this site, a few others, and see pros and cons on both sides. Just trying to understand more about this stuff. For the past year I haven't lied, cheated, or stole from anyone, and have held down a full time job for the first time in forever. Made 100% of my child support payments for the first time since divorce (6 years ago). Went to church with my ex-wife and kids the past 2 months. I KNOW from experience that every drug impacts people differently, so not understanding when I read that people aren't "feeling" their emotions. I laugh with my kids, cry with my ex-wife as we're trying to mend fences, sleep 7-8 hours a night, and basically live a 100% different life than I did when I was on norcos and somas. Yes, the first 3 months I was on subs I used more than prescribed, but never understood why taking more never got me feeling more...you understand. Since month 4 and going forward, I have taken a half everyday, and things have improved dramatically for me. Read a number of posts on different topics on different websites, both for and against subs.

Looked at, and posted on another site that is apparently against suboxone. I guess I'm just at a point in my life where I've seen a lot of damage done to addicts and the families, and I've found the answer for me. If this medication stops your old, lying, thieving, cheating ways, then I say keep it up. I want to encourage those who are struggling with this beast of a disease, and at the same time have a level of humility and understanding for those who do not agree with using this medication for "recovery" purposes. For me, my family, and parents, will take this "me", as opposed to the "bad me". Look at what works for you, there is value in step-work (even for people not "in recovery"), we could all use a dose of humility once in awhile, and we can all work on our character defects. If your life is BETTER as a result of taking subs, then IMO, that's no different than someone taking medication prescribed by a doctor for another illness, or deficiency. I see a lot of strong opinions on both sides, and if you are in good standing in your mind with your maker (higher power if you like, I prefer God), than keep moving forward towards getting well.

Thanks for listening to my background story (tried to keep it short). I have worked the steps, and sponsored a couple guys (during the 9 month stay, and 2 and a half years clean and sober afterwards, but still relapsed). I'm not some young kid, newcomer, or old-timer either...just wanted some comments about pros and cons of staying on/off subs. Not here to bash, or get bashed, trying to hear some logical, reasoned remarks about subs. I've been in and out of the drug/recovery scene for over 15 years, so I've heard a lot, still looking for support and advice, thanks.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 07, 2015 4:01 pm 
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Joined: Fri Mar 08, 2013 1:02 pm
Posts: 1342
Location: West Tennessee
Hi Todd,

A big welcome to you!

I really appreciate your opinions about suboxone and your balanced view of the pro's and con's. It's very wise to be able to see other peoples opinions and give value to them, without being swayed to one extreme or another. I like to think that our forum is very balanced. While we don't like it when people come here to rant and rave about how terrible they think suboxone is, we don't disagree that there can be some side-effects and some down sides associated with it's use.

I won't reiterate what you already know about the benefits of it, but I definitely think that when used properly it is a wonderful tool to get us into recovery. Like you, I don't really get the "not feeling emotions" part of it either. I'm willing to see that some people may have different experiences with it, but I don't notice an extreme difference in my emotions at all. Rather, I believe when people taper and jump the extreme emotions are caused by the wd itself, not from the absence of a substance. More often than not this heightened awareness of emotions will level out after the "honeymoon" phase is over. Just my opinion.

The anti-sub forums will have you believe that suboxone should only be used short term. Not sure how that works for them, but I know for sure that a few months wouldn't have been enough for me to break free from my addiction. I'm very grateful that everyone doesn't hold the same opinion, and that I found this site to educate me when I didn't understand how suboxone should be used and what to expect from it.

Congratulations on your recovery by the way. I hope everything works out with you and your wife. I understand the strain that addiction can put on a relationship, but it can be healed. Have faith! :D

Q

_________________
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. ~ Eleanor Roosevelt


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