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 Post subject: NEVER SAY NEVER
PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2009 4:58 pm 
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Hi everyone, I am a 27 year old mother of 2 kids and married to a wonderful man. A couple years ago I was introduced to oxycodone by a friend. I knew a lot of people who abused drugs and I had that attitude, THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN TO ME! I could never have been anymore wrong and if nothing else this has taught me no one is above anything. Anything can happen to anyone at any time, lets just say I don’t use the word never anymore. I have always had chronic back pain and I was feeling down and life was taking a turn for the worst for me. I suffered through postpartum depression after giving birth to my son. I felt like life couldn’t get any worse. My friend thought that the oxys would help me feel better, and they did. I sought out a doctor for myself and received my own RX for oxycodone. After my first month I was hooked. I began to use more and more finding my tolerance level rise faster than I could ever image. Before I even realized it I was using 3-4 60mgs of morphine and 4-7 30mgs of oxycodone a day. I snorted the pills, I never took them orally and about 6 months ago I decided I had had enough. The pills worked for a while, I felt better than I had since I could remember but after that long of abuse they didn’t work anymore. I was taking a crazy amount of opiates just to get me out of bed. I began to grow more depressed gave up on everything, school, house work, and even the things I loved. I shut my entire family off and locked myself in the house. I decided to quit and I was doing it cold turkey. After about a week and a half of pure hell I relapsed and was right back where I started. For the last 6 months I have been looking for an answer to my problems. My friends suggested suboxone so last Monday I went to a suboxone clinic. I am on 2mg tabs 3 times a day. I had read stories about suboxone, watched videos and I guess I had higher hopes for the medication. The first day was pure hell and yes I was going thorough some horrible withdrawals before I began it. Everyday has gotten a little easier but I just don’t feel good. I still have horrible cravings and still some withdrawals but I have to say they are nothing compared to what I would have been though without the suboxone. I see my doctor again Monday, hopefully he can increase my dosage because I really don’t think 6mg a day is enough. I wish you all the best in your recovery and I look forward to being a member of this board.


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2009 6:05 pm 
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I am no doc by any means, but sounds to me that you do need an increased dose. I also think that 1 dose a day is best. Considering the multiple doses does not help for the addicitve nature of more dose=more relief......and the long half life of bupe, I have read many posts and other sources that said once daily dose is best. Maybe he will give you 1 - 8 mg suboxone per day.

I speak from experience with bupe and almost every other agoinist we have available to us today in this decade. Suboxone must be individiualized for every patient (PLEASE excuse spelling cause I SUCK). I have been on for 5 months and thank everyday because of it. You will need the dose that is for you, the dose that takes away the sickness and feelings of w/d's. You may need to check into different dr. too because some are quacks whereas others are wonderful people looking to help and not collect ($$$).

Please dont take anything offensive as for I am a terrible typer and am forever losing translation of things to the keyboard and screen....I have legit back issues, severe pain and have no choice of not working because i run my business and cannot afford not to work or collect....plus no insurance due to outragous quotes because of back issues.....i can go on...but...

OXY is great and so are so many other agoinists but doctors are (well, for me) reluctant to up dosage due to tolerance mainily because of my age (26) and he stated that....pain doctor did, not sub doc, i no longer see pain doc obviously, or first sub doc but thats different story. He tried to level my pain meds off once I got sky high, and obviously then there is no pain relief, so I ended up finding my own, and self medicated.....etc, etc, etc..........etc.....

Any way I can help please ask, sorry to be so brief but hoped to give some insight.......GOOD LUCK!!


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2009 9:23 pm 
Lost, I agree with you completely about never saying never!! I, too, had (still have in a lot of ways thank God) a life that many would find enviable. If you had told me 5 or more years ago that this was going to happen to me, I would have said with complete confidence - "no way!" I have learned the hard way to never say never. I've lost a great deal to my addiction - too much! But I refuse to lose any more!! As much as I would love to go back and change the past, I cannot.
So here we are - left to deal with the mess that opiates made of us. I am proud of you - you decided to get help, whatever it took. I believe you're on the right track. Try not to give up on Suboxone yet. If you're like I was by the time I got on Suboxone, you really don't have a choice, right? You know you can't handle cold turkey. Even if you get through the acutes, you'll relapse soon enough because of the depression and low motivation that soon follows. My doctor was more generous than your's - he started me on 8mg three times a day as needed to stop w/d symptoms and cravings. The first week or so I took at least two 8mg tabs and sometimes another 1/2 tab. It didn't completely rid me of all cravings, but I felt really good, no not good, normal! And it was wonderful!! Soon I was able to go to once a day dosing of 8mg and have felt pretty good. The cravings took a little longer than I would've liked to disipate, but they finally have. Now it's pretty rare that I miss the pain pills, don't even think about them very often anymore. I've been on Sub for 4 1/2 months.
So hang in there - it will get better. I don't think you are on quite enough and I hope your doctor will bump you up. Be sure and tell him how you are feeling and how badly you want this to work. You will read a lot of great information out there, especially on this forum. But everyone is different, so the perfect dose for one may not be the perfect dose for you. Especially during your first 2-3 weeks it takes some adjustments to get where you want to be. So please don't give up on this! Any way I can help, feel free to PM me. And post here often as everyone here will want to help you!


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 Post subject: Never give up
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 12:50 pm 
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I agree with the other comments made here, 6mg does seem like a small dose, but at least your md is erring on the side of caution. There is such a wide variation in individuals responses to various medications, so he is obviously acting with your best interests at heart.
I hope that you find the correct regime soon, I agree that a single daily dose is the way to go. I have been on 8mg daily for the last 11 months and have not had a single problem with it.
Best wishes for the future,
Sneaky


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 Post subject: Be open with the Doc.
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 3:41 pm 
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Hello Lost...
CONGRATS on looking for & getting help!!
Welcome to the forum. I think you will find it very informative and helpfull. I would suggest telling your Dr. exactly how you are felling. I am No Dr. and I would not try to guess what dose anyone should be on. I already tried to play Pharmacist to myself and look where that got me.... Anyways to give you something to measure up against. I was taking between 300 - 350 mgs. a day of Oxycodone when I finally surended and got HELP!! My Suboxone Dr. started me off with 2mg tabs during induction in his office 1 - 2mg. pill about every hour and a half for a total that first day of 8 mgs. I am now on 2 - 8mgs pills a day (16 mgs/day) and have been since about my second day on the medication. So that can tell what my experience was/is. Again we are all different and drugs react different in each of us, But I thought it would be helpfull to get someone elses history.... I wish you the best in your recovery.

God Bless
TW


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 Post subject: BEWARE - - - Old Posts
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 8:18 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2009 7:36 pm
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I just wanted to mention that these are some pretty old posts that are being responded to. I've seen this happening more and more lately - especially with newer visitors to the board. In this case, the original post is about 10 weeks old and it appears that the poster only created one message and likely didn't hang around for very long. Sometimes pulling up some of these old discussions can be very helpful and provoke an all new discussion. If that's what you're attempting - by all means, have at it. However, if you are attempting to help the original poster, you may want to pay attention to the original date and see if that person is likely to even be around anymore.

Visitors come and go all of the time. That is just the nature of any chat board. I'm guessing that when you throw addiction into the mix it only gets worse (as far as who sticks around or even comes back).

Just like with that old package you find in the back of the freezer - better check the date before you do anything else!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 9:27 pm 
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Thanks Donh for the comment about the dates. There was one post on here (not this one)where the person posted 16 months back, promising part 2 if able to finish their story. There has been no follow up as far as I can see, and I was wondering if the person concerned is ok.


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