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 Post subject: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 03, 2014 11:18 am 
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Hi. This is my first time posting anything online. I am trying to taper off and quit suboxone and need support. For various reasons, "live" support groups, family, or dr. are NOT an option for me. I am an educated professional with 2 healthy (thank God) school aged children and cannot afford to be ill or crazed with anxiety. I have been taking Suboxone for about 8 years; I made a very bad choice and started taking part of someone else's prescription, then got hooked. Anyway, over the last 4 months have tapered down from 12 mg daily to 1 and a half, and today went down to 1 mg.
I am scared, and hope to find some moral support and practical advice. I cannot talk to ANYONE I know personally about this, so please don't suggest it; it is just not an option.
So far I have experienced some mild withdrawl symptoms, but overall actually am feeling much better- more focused, more "feeling" emotionally than I have in years.
I am looking for some online friends to help me, and maybe I can help others as well??
THANK YOU!
I'm Determined!


Last edited by rca1004 on Wed Jun 04, 2014 6:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 03, 2014 4:48 pm 
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I have been on it for 13 years. 2 days off. Lets do this together...!!


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 03, 2014 5:46 pm 
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Welcome to the forum RCA!

If you can stand a slow taper, that is what I suggest. I would stay at 1 mg until you stop feeling any withdrawal symptoms and then drop a little lower. Then repeat. If you have to do a much faster taper from 1 mg, you can expect some yucky withdrawal symptoms that peak at day 4 and then start to diminish. Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 03, 2014 10:01 pm 
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Getting down to 1mg is great, you've made fantastic progress. Like Amy said, you can continue lowering your dose slowly and you'll more than likely only feel mild wd symptoms, or you can go faster and see if you can push through the symptoms.

Do you have the film strips or pills? Are your films or pills the 8mg dose or the 2mg dose?

Either way, you should be shooting for about a 10% reduction in dose now that you're below 2mg. A 10% dose reduction is usually fairly well tolerated.

Normally we would suggest going to a Dr. to get some Clonidine. Clonidine is a blood pressure medication that's prescribed off label for opiate wd, but it looks like this isn't an option for you?

In my experience, OTC counter meds or supplements really didn't do squat for my wd symptoms, so I don't have any supplements to recommend to you. Honestly, the best thing you can do during wd is to keep your mind and body busy. Listen to your favorite music, that helps. Exercise helps, too. Taking a nice hot shower relieves wd symptoms as well.

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sun May 04, 2014 7:49 am 
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thank you SO much for the posts. What a difference it is not to feel alone (but I still feel stupid and ashamed of myself for getting into this mess in the first place)
I have been using 8 mg strips and cutting them up as carefully as I can. Yesterday went from 1 sixth of a stip to 1 eighth, so am at 1 mg for 24 hours now. I slept fine, but woke up early, feeling a little kicky but not too bad. This is not my first time detoxing from opiates; it is my 3rd. once off oxy and once off methadone, but this is my first off suboxone and I have heard it is really hard, so am scared and would like to hear honest details from others who have done it successfully.
I was much younger the last two times, now I am 48, and I think finally ready to face life substance free!!! I don't know why I havn't tried to quit earlier, time just flew by and I told myself I couldn't afford to be sick, which I still dont think I can, but have managed to get this far and keep my life on track. I didnt know they made 2 mg strips, that would be much easier to split now that I am down so low, I will see if I can get some, but I might have to keep splitting the 8 mg which is getting tricky to be accurate.
Then I am splitting the 1 mg into 3 tiny pieces and taking one in the morning when I wake up, one at noon, and one at 3pm, and that has been working for me; that is how I went from 12 to 1mg; but soon I don't think I will be able to split my dose into 3 doses, and that scares me too.
My husband wonders why I am "torchering myself", but I feel like I am doing something healthy for myself because it cannot be healthy to be on this s___, especially over the long term, but I do understand that some people need it to save thier lives, and I do not judge!! It was just a bad choice for me, and I want to be my normal, clear headed self again, with the normal emotions that go with facing life and learning healthy ways to deal with stress.
I work out pretty regularly, but havn't been to the gym in a while, so am going to go this morning and just get moving and get my mind busy as suggested. Thanks again for "listening" and for any additional comments and help. I will read anything and everything anyone posts, and will be happy to "listen" to anyone else who needs an outlet and a friendly ear!


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sun May 04, 2014 11:09 am 
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Back from the gym and feeling pretty good. I think staying active is probably very good advice if you can manage it. I suppose tomorrow I will feel worse since it will be day 3 of my new dosage, but so far so good. I also listened to music I liked whiile I worked out, and that was very motivating as well. Just sharing my experiences as I go along here, and hoping to be helpful to others if I am successful...for now though I still feel pretty "needy". Physically right now I feel fine (I had a bought of sneezing this morning), but mentally I am worried....
Thanks for the tips- keep them coming please!!


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sun May 04, 2014 9:48 pm 
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Hi rca. I have messaged you. You are doing brilliantly. If you have been to the gym I am impressed!!! :-) Keep that up.


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 5:23 pm 
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Day 5 of 1 mg (down from 2mg)

Not feeling bad, but definitely can tell I've dropped. I fell asleep about 10 but woke up at 3:30am feeling pretty buggy. Also had a sneezing fit. Could not relax (RLS) so took part of my daily dose, felt better after about 1 hour, but then was up for the day.
Today I have stuck to 1 mg, split into 3 pieces. Took first one at 3am, 2nd at 1pm, and am saving my 3rd piece until bedtime so I can hopefully sleep better. I figure easier to deal with this if I am well rested at least. I'm also jumping on the stairmaster now and then and I think that is really helping.
From what I've read though, I guess 1 mg is still a pretty big dose but it seems small compared to where I started. I find it hard to believe that like .125 mg even does anything, but I guess I shall find out pretty soon!
My biggest hurtle is that I work full time and am a full time mom of a 10 year old and 12 year old. I can't really just lay around for 2 weeks or more. So I guess I'm going to have to take it really slow like I have been, although now that I see a light at the end of the tunnel, I really really want to stop altogether.
I think I will stay at 1mg for another 2 weeks, then drop to .5 for 3 weeks, then try and jump. I don't work in June and July, so that should be a bit easier, but like I said, still full time mom, so I feel a little stuck...maybe it won't be that bad???
Anymore advice? Success stories of jumping at .5?


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Thu May 08, 2014 7:36 pm 
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Day 6 at 1mg down from 2mg

Yesterday I took my doses later in the day (taking 1 mg split into 3 pieces). Last dose yesterday at about 5pm and today at 6pm. This helped a lot with my sleep, and have not had any more RLS at all.
Also having a little Xanax at the end of the day (and just KNOWING I have it) has been helping a lot also. I've had some mild stomach cramping, but all in all tolerable. I have been working, and I think that has also actually helped because I am super busy and don't have much time to think of myself.
Since this drop is going relatively easy, I am thinking of of dropping to .5 mg next week to see how I tolerate it. I mean, what is the worst thing that can happen? If it gets too bad, I'll just go back to dropping really slowly, right?
I got a little freaked out when I read someone's post (forget whose) that said their pharmacist heard of a study that said people can NEVER kick Suboxone dependance! I intend to prove them wrong, and have also read some success stories here that I'd rather believe than any of the negative stuff. Our minds are where it all begins, so let's think positively! I guess that is easier to say when the wd are not that bad....
I have had some increased anxiety, but trying to remember that is just a symptom that will ease with time, right??
Tomorrow I'm going on a field trip with my kids; we leave at 5am and get back at 10pm, so it will be a long day...I hope it will be good one!!!


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Thu May 08, 2014 9:30 pm 
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People most certainly can and do kick Suboxone dependence.

DoaQ (Diary of a Quitter)---over 5 years off of Suboxone.

Romeo (me!)--- 4 years off of Suboxone.

mg113---3 years off of Suboxone.

Rainraingoaway---3 years off of Suboxone.

Aquasun12206---3 years off of Suboxone.

cbk1014---3 years off of Suboxone.

TinyDancer---over 1 year off of Suboxone.

WantToBeFree---over 1 year off of Suboxone.

These are just the people from this forum that I've kept up with and who I know are still off drugs.

Yes, anxiety is a fairly common symptom during wd and during a taper. The best approach I found to dealing with my anxiety from wd was to realize it's just a symptom of the wd and it will fade, which it always did. Focusing on my breathing during a sharp bout of anxiety helped too.

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2014 6:20 am 
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Thank you Romeo for the success list- in about year I want to join it!! Very motivational to know it can be done!!


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2014 6:45 am 
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Can anyone tell me, if you are at a low dose for awhile, say .5 and have stabilized with no wd symptoms, and the just for one day up the dose to 2mg or so, will you have wd symptoms again if you go right back to .5mg the next day? Do you go right back to where you were and have to start again, or will you be stable at .5 again?


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2014 11:00 pm 
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Hi RCA! I think that going up to 2 mg for one day is not going to derail all of your progress. I think that you can go back down to .5mg the next day and be fine physically. I believe that challenge will be mostly mental. If you keep busy and power through the next few days I don't think you'll notice physical symptoms. If you dwell on every little sneeze or ache and pain you are much likely to "feel" a difference. The question is, why would you go up to 2mg for one day?

Amy

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 10, 2014 9:35 am 
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Thanks Amy...I don't know why I might go from .5 to 2mg, but just wanted to know what would happen if I did...
I know I am overthinking this process..I am nervous about this final stage...I understand that there is no way to get to the otherside without going through it, but don't know if I'm ready to jump just yet. If I didn't have other people I was responsible for and could just 'disappear' for a couple of weeks, I'm pretty sure I'd jump right now and be done with it, but am trying to figure out how to keep functioning fairly "normally" as I work my way towards being truly "normal" again!
Thanks again for the feedback;it helps.


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sat May 10, 2014 11:04 pm 
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In that list I provided above, there are two members who jumped from .5mg and had no acute wd or PAWS. They, at most, had a few days of mild discomfort. Both of these people were in top physical shape. One lifted weights daily and the other was running 9 - 10 miles daily when they jumped. One was 45 years old, the other 36.

Their wd experience isn't necessarily the norm, but I wanted to point them out to you because it is possible.

Other people I've talked to on the forum who have jumped from .5mg mostly have less than a week of less than spectacular wd symptoms. It's no picnic, but they are most certainly not bedridden, writhing in pain. To the best of my recollection, I don't remember anyone who has tapered down to .5mg, jumped and had a hell wd.

With all that said, I completely understand why you would want to taper further, as many others do. I think we had a guy here who tapered down to .04mg, maybe even lower. Of course when he jumped, he didn't feel a thing. IMO, a taper like that just prolongs the stress of a taper.

Anyway, I think I'm trying to tell you that you won't have to disappear for a couple of weeks. At the level you're at, you've already gone through most of your wd and what's left shouldn't be crazy at all.

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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sun May 11, 2014 5:16 am 
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Can I just add. I am on day 9 now rca. Jumped from .4 Didnt really sleep well last night and feel a bit groggy today, and I know I am not in a position to talk about paws yet, but as detox's go and I have done MANY of them, this one has been fairly manageable. I know I was in spain for the first week, so bit different to your situation. But as I sit here today this moment in time, I was scared over nothing (wds). I really hope that last statement doesnt come back and bite me on the ass!!! :-) good luck


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Sun May 11, 2014 4:17 pm 
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Thanks; that is encouraging to know!!
I am still holding steady today at 1mg. Went to the gym today and felt ok, but definitely do not have my normal energy. My plan now is to start to taper again next Saturday, go down to .5, and then jump June 1st. My kids will be at their grandma's that week, and that is the only time I won't have them with me until same time next year, so I figure it is a good time as any to take the plunge.
I do have to keep working though, but at least at home I won't have to take care of anyone else except myself. I like the info about the two people who were really fit and had little wd...I used to be an athlete, and still work out so am going to push myself as much as I can to keep up the exercise and get those "natural" endorphins going. When I was on a higher dose of suboxone I noticed I never could get that really good exercise or runners' high when I worked out. I'd feel good, but not as good as I used to, so I'm hoping when all the medication is out of my system, I will be able to get that healthy high again. I remember hearing an interview with James Taylor who was addicted to heroine I think, anyway he said his secret to staying sober was VIGOROUS exercise, and I think that is what is going to help me as well, and sounds like it has helped others.


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2014 4:42 pm 
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Day 9 at 1 mg
The more I read on this site, I see that 1 mg is really not that low, so I feel kind of wimpy to have been stressing (obsessing?) so much about my drop from 2mg.
Anyway, survived another Monday at work. Some little life problems are starting to worry me...I can feel my chest tightening up just thinking about it...but one day at a time and first things first, right?


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 5:53 pm 
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Day 10 at 1mg drop (down 50% from 2mg)

Nothing earth shattering to report...writing here just really seems to calm me, and I'm getting motivation from reading everyone else's posts (I reading everything!!) Work day flew by, and now relaxing before dinner with my family who have no idea what I'm going through! This forum is really helping with knowing I have people to "talk" to who understand.

Had some runny eyes and nose, but not bad at all and no other symptoms other than feeling a little edgy in the morning before my first dose which I consider a good sign because it means something is happening (the drug is getting out of my system!)
More than the physical pain, I am worried about the anxiety (which is really self defeating I know- worrying about worrying!). I can take a lot of pain (birthed 2 babies after all), but the mental pain in my opinion is more difficult to tolerate.
I think I'm going to be ready to drop to .5 this weekend. I've been advised to go more slowly, but if I'm going to try and jump June 1, I want to taper as low as I can before then and stabilize at a lower dose. I think that is wise, right?
Is there a concise list (like a shopping list) of all the over the counter products (i,e, vitamins, melatonin, etc) and all the healthiest foods to eat to give your body the best chance of quick, slightly more comfortable recovery? Is pedialite better than gatorade? I want to stock up on everything this weekend, and make sure I'm preparing my body as well as I can to get through the discomfort. Even if over the counter stuff does not make a big difference, I think I'll feel more in control and 'ready' if I have prepared (placebo effect maybe?)
Thanks for any and all feed back and comments.


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 Post subject: Re: Need support
PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 9:53 pm 
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Hi rca. I am ready to go down to .5mg by this weekend as well, and start skipping days on Monday. From what I have read, it is best to skip 1 day, dose, skip 2 days, dose, skip 3 days, dose, and then be done. The point in skipping days is due to the long half-life. However, I plan on having .25mg on standby in case I ABSOLUTELY can't handle it. This has been a giant secret that I have been keeping for months so it's nice to get it out and reach out to someone in the same boat as me! Please keep me posted on your progress! Best of luck!


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