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 Post subject: My moody Suboxone doctor
PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 11:16 am 
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My sub doctor from the last 3 years is also our primary care physician. That's been quite handy and it's worked out well so far. We normally get along well. In fact I recently posted about how we had a really good conversation about suboxone and he was very open-minded with me.

Well, he's a moody mother fucker! Now because of some primary care issues that he and I are differing on (there are abnormal findings in my lungs and now he won't refer me to a pulmonologist), I'm in a shitty ass position. I feel like in order to secure my position with my sub doctor, I have to acquiesce to him in other ways. In other words, I can't get pissed off at him in order to get my referral, because I might lose him as my sub doctor!

One time a few months ago we had an almost argument related to my husband's care and he actually said to me that maybe I needed to find a new doctor. It wasn't some knock down drag out fight or anything. I simply got a bit upset (reasonably so considering the circumstances), and he shut me up by making that threat along with putting his fucking hand in my face!

This is not the kind of shit that I normally take kindly to from anyone in my life. I stand up for myself every chance I have. I'm very assertive. But because I have to depend on him to supply my suboxone prescription, I'm between a rock and a hard place. I can either advocate for my own health care needs - which I plan to do so very assertively, but in doing so, I risk pissing him off and losing my sub doctor.

Can I just say: AAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!! How is this right? And how is this fair? I feel like he has me by the balls. This is the same doctor that has referred my husband to any specialist he wants for next to nothing. I'm on two immunosuppressants and am a thirty-year smoker, yet he doesn't think I need to see a specialist regarding these findings. This is NOT the first time since we've been seeing him that I've got the distinct feeling that my husband gets better services from him than I do. Too many male doctors don't take the health concerns of women seriously, and I now fear that my own doctor is one of them.

Currently, I'm figuring out how I want to handle this to get the maximum amount of PROPER health care for me and the least amount of conflict in the process. I'll sit with my anger and frustration and fear for a day or two and discuss it further with my husband, but I need to take action regarding this referral he refuses to give me. I just need to get my medical needs met without losing my suboxone doctor in the process.

Still screaming...

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 11:55 am 
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Oh, you probably just need an antidepressant and a nice nap!

Seriously though, aren't you entitled to a second opinion? Or would that piss him off too?

If he's normally level headed, maybe reapproach him in a few days or something? Maybe someone pissed in his cornflakes.

Also, you're totally correct about guys getting better medical care.

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 Post subject: HMO?
PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:12 pm 
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Hat,

Unless you are in a HMO why can't you just go see whoever you want to? And if you've found a Suboxone Dr. who is in your HMO then that's great, but I do see where it puts you in a bad position. Can I assume he is the only one you found who will treat you with Suboxone as maintenance? Those are a bit hard to find and I have regular insurance with lots of doctors to choose from.

Sorry you have to go through this. But knowing you, if there is a way out of it you'll find it.

For now just keep venting.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:37 pm 
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We have a BC/BS PPO plan that technically says we do NOT need referrals to see a specialist. Before we moved here, we saw specialists without the need of a formal referral. Then we moved a whopping hour away and have the same insurance plan, but in this smaller medical community, any specialist will not see a patient without a referral from their primary care doc.

One of my options is to drive back to my old pulmonologist from 5 years ago without the referral. But if/when my doc (Dr. H) finds out I went around his back to see a specialist, it will almost certainly push him to quit as my doctor. (Keep in mind that whatever consequences ensue will also apply to my husband - Dr H is his PCP too.)

That said, I am considering doing just that. The basic situation is simple: Dr. H wants me to just wait 6 months to do another CT whereas I want to consult with a pulmonologist and have THAT person be the one to explain the specifics on why that's the best route to take. I just want someone who's specialty is in lungs to be the one to make the call to wait and for how long. That's ALL!

My situation as I see it boils down to this. I would be advocating for my needs in a much different way with him if my PCP were not my suboxone doctor. HE HAS ME BY THE FUCKING BALLS.

Quite frankly, that pisses me off.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 1:40 pm 
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What the hell does he have to lose by giving you a referral? I don't get it. That's very frustrating!


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 Post subject: The Age Old Problem
PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 7:15 pm 
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Sounds like he is playing God which is not uncommon with doctors. He knows he has you in a corner and is probably relishing the power factor.

Either way, I hope this works out for you Hat.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2012 8:24 pm 
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this really sucks hatmaker i see a pulmonnologist thursday'. what F'n doctor found abnormal findings in your lungs?

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 21, 2012 12:17 am 
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How bout I hop a plane and "rough'm up for ya?"

LOL

We're all here for you Hat...............

I hope everything is OK, with your lungs, and all that. I mean, c'mon!! thats kinda important!!

Uggh, hoping everything works out, sooner rather than later :roll:

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 21, 2012 8:16 am 
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See what I mean, even you guys - anonymous people on the fucking internet - see the importance of an abnormal finding on my freakin' LUNGS!!!

Yes, Rule, he is playing god. The thing that another doctor told me is that regardless of anything, I SHOULD HAVE PEACE OF MIND. Dr. H is the one that should be considering that. As a person who has smoked for 30 years (I can't believe I'm old enough to have done anything for that long) and with a long history of lung problems including cancer in my family, I need them to give me some assurance that this is not cancer. And she is right - I DO need some peace of mind.

Yet they want me to sit here worrying that I might have lung cancer for the next 6 months. How is that peace of mind? IT'S NOT! Yet my own doctor, the person who is supposed to be central in my health care needs, hasn't even considered that.

I have a possible solution that an RN friend of mine suggested that I'm currently considering. I'll let you know once I've made that decision. I'll probably respond to him in writing, very very kindly, asking him if he's sure there's no chance this is cancer and if he would be comfortable having his own wife wait like he's asking me to wait, then I'll be comfortable doing the same. And if he's comfortable putting that in writing, then maybe I'll be OK with that. That is the assurance I'm looking for. That whatever is in my lungs isn't going to sit there growing so that in 6 months it'll kill me!

That's ALL I want...is that too much to ask for?

PS - and Amber, I'm putting you second in line after my cousin from NYC to come here to Michigan to kick his ass!

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 22, 2012 1:31 pm 
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hatmaker'. i no this is going to sound funny and not interest you. eat a half clove of raw garlic chop'd up in food daily
i do and it's been working well for 5 years. it's a blood cleanser and revives your lungs. DO IT DAM IT!!!

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 22, 2012 5:47 pm 
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wishing u the best. sorry u are having troubles.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 22, 2012 11:36 pm 
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Primary Care doctors are supposed to be concerned with our mental well-being, as well as physical. How is it doing your mental health any good to sit around for 6 months and stress that you may have something in your body that could be a ticking time bomb? Even if it turns out to be absolutely nothing, stress can cause other damaging effects on your body, just by being concerned about your lungs! From what you describe, your doctor sounds like a patronizing misogynist.

Good luck, Hat. I hate that you have to go through this.

Amy

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2012 11:11 am 
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Quote:
your doctor sounds like a patronizing misogynist.


AGREED!

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-I'm only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2012 8:41 am 
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My doctor is still being a prick and I don't see him until July 19th for my normal sub appointment. And whatever I do or say is going to have to be in a very passive manner.

I did finally get to see a copy of my CT scan report. And unfortunately it's worse than I thought. The doctors didn't tell me everything that was on the report. Apparently there are two densities in my lungs that could either be harmless granulomas or not so harmless tumors. And there are also enlarged lymph nodes near those densities (I would say that indicates they are fighting something off, wouldn't you agree?). And they want me to NOT see a pulmonologist and just wait 4-6 months and just re-scan then.

I guess I can admit to all of you that I'm pretty much scared as shit about this. My last chest xray was in November and it was perfectly clear, which means whatever these are JUST grew! And waiting 4+ months means they could double in size in that time. And if they are tumors, well, as a 30 year smoker, well, we all know what that means. And my family history doesn't make the scenario any better - lung cancer is in my family on both sides going back 3 generations. And I'm on two immunosuppressants. All these other factors are the reasons why I want to see a specialist; but apparently my doctor doesn't think my health is worth that. And unfortunately, he's got me feeling the same way about myself. It's hard not to feel that way when the one person who is supposed to be taking care of my health just doesn't care.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2012 10:35 am 
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but hat'. he is taking care of you'. he has been treating you fair with your meds in the past of all your other post? i just don't get it? man if this was happening to me, i would probably end up some where and make them give me a test no matter what!!

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2012 10:40 am 
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oh hat'. have you spoke with the forum DR?

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2012 2:06 pm 
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I am so angry on your behalf! How dare he play with your life! I wish I had a good suggestion about what to do, but I can see you're between a rock and a hard place. But don't go thinking that your health isn't worth a fight, no matter what your stinking doctor thinks! Can you pay out of pocket to see a radiologist who can look at your films and give a second opinion? Then, if the radiologist agrees with your doctor, at least you have some piece of mind that it's OK to wait the 4 to 6 months. Or if the opinion differs, then you know that you absolutely need to fight for your right to aggressive treatment, and you'll have to be looking for another sub doctor. Your peace of mind is worth a few hundred out of pocket, even if that means breaking the bank! Do not give up. You are worth fighting for!

Amy

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2012 8:24 am 
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Thanks, Amy. You're so sweet! I think I've figured out why I'm so resigned to being sick. The choices are to sit here for 4-6 months wondering with no answers or sit here knowing that something serious is wrong. I guess it's easier to believe that I'm sick. I'm just so fucked up with all this it's not even funny. We all die someday and frankly, I have ALL the risk factors and more to get lung cancer. And I'm not too young for it either.

I cannot believe my own doctor, by asking me to DO NOTHING, has basically got me convinced that I'm seriously ill. THAT IS SO FUCKED UP!!!

But again, I see him on the 19th and I'm going to explain to him that my breathing isn't what it should be, especially after having lost over 60 pounds. Maybe that will kick him in his damn ass.

And Amy, I'm filled with RAGE for him right now, so it'll make it difficult for me to remain passive around him on the 19th. UGH!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 4:10 am 
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i sure hope suboxone treatment is not a fact of getting in the way? like other post and behave'rs doctor's just some time's
did not trust there patients because they think there problem is not based on the right issue. just my 2 cent's .

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 8:01 am 
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I can tell you this, Johnboy, my doctor has put me in a little box... a box for women, a box for chronic pain sufferers, and a box for addicts. So yes, you are partially right. And he seems to have his own preconceived notions about the kind of people that women, pain patients, and addicts are who knows what kind of conclusion he's come to due to that.

I'm still stunned that this is the same guy who was so open to discussing suboxone uses with me (he had asked for those articles about sub). Maybe his fucking dogs died since then, who the fuck knows. I just wish he'd pull whatever god damn hair is up his ass out and get to doing his fucking job!

(I think me getting pissed off is a good thing, it means I'm ready to fight for my health!)

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