It is currently Sat Aug 19, 2017 8:24 pm



All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Our Sponsors





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 74 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next
Author Message
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 12:49 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Hi jmdear,

I've been trying to think of how to answer your post. I feel for you. I'm not sure how much help I'll be as I don't have Children yet and I didn't have anyone completely dependent on me while I was going through it. I will say that if you taper down to a low level, it will not be as bad as you think at any given moment. It's more the longevity of it but even then, that really varies person to person. I can tell you that I jumped on a saturday and only missed one day of work, the first Monday. I went to work everyday after that. I have an office job but still, my mind had to be "on" and I had to get up everyday and go through the motions. Some days were just easier than others but I did it. As a mom, I'm assuming you're used to taking care of the kids whether you have a cold or didn't get enough sleep? I think you have to be in that mindset.

There are tricks to making it easier. Music in the car while driving, music on your ipod while you're waiting for kids at practice.. Advil. Clonidine. I would even suggest talking to your doctor about a short term sleep aid. Many people suggest OTC sleep aids but I used a benzo. It helped me and I was able to completely stop w/ out any issues but I understand that may not be the case for everyone. Hot baths after the kids are a sleep.. etc.

If this is truly what you want, I'm sure you can do it. The fear is worse than the reality, it's just a commitment. You can message me anytime, if you want.

Let me know how you're doing.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 3:29 pm 
Offline
One Month or More
One Month or More
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 7:22 pm
Posts: 35
Thank you for the reply. I just have one daughter...though she is so busy, everyone says she like having 3 boys :)
I would like another baby, but there is no way I am doing it while on subs. My husband, my daughter and the desire to give her a sibling is my motivation to stop, at least until I can begin to care of about myself enough.

I am a very busy person...perhaps borderline hyperactive. Before the economy tanked here, I was a restaurant manager at a busy touristy-type place...I speed-walked an average of 8 miles a night(my assistant gave me a pedometer as a joke, but I used it). When I was that busy, I would sometimes forget to take the subs...I felt so much better even then...but working that much was hard on my daughter. I am hoping to find a happy medium somewhere before I start this process. I have lowered my dose by 4 mg this past week and only had a few days of anxiety, though it was bad. I am hoping to be on the lowest dose by summer break...then I can take her to Florida to visit Grandma, and perhaps get off then.

Thank you for all the tips.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 9:42 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Hi jmdear,

Sorry I pluralized "kids", I knew you were speaking about your Daughter but it came out wrong on my end.

It seems like you're off to a good start as far as tapering goes. If you can do it gradually where you acclimate to each lowered level, you shouldn't feel it too bad. Are you taking one dose daily or split up into multiples? I'm hoping your hyperactivity will work in your favor! LOL Maybe you'll have just enough energy to get through the beginning part of jumping. :wink:

Like you, I will have to find a happy medium eventually when I become a mommy. I love my job right now but it takes up anywhere from 10-12 hours a day and that is just not going to fly with Children. I don't know what my future holds as far as balancing being a mother and working. I don't think I could be a SAHM for very long but who knows, maybe I will prefer it.

Getting help from Grandma in Florida sounds like an awesome idea. I hope it works out for you this way. I wish I could have jumped in a really warm place. It would have been so much better to be laying in the warm sun during my early detox days. Not only do you get some much needed vitamins from the sun but it can help keep you from getting really cold. I was cold a lot. Yup, music and sun sounds like a really good way to go.


Top
 Profile  
 
Our Sponsors
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Mar 02, 2013 5:27 pm 
Offline
One Month or More
One Month or More
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 7:22 pm
Posts: 35
If you have gotten off this stuff after the length of time you were on it and have made it this far, I can promise you that you can do anything, including finding that happy medium and You will be an awesome Mother, I am sure. Just please don't take the pain pills after delivery..I would give my right leg to go back and have skipped the Vicodin..the physical pain from the complicated delivery seems like a walk in the park right about now....being a new Mom was difficult..I was 22, my husband was working all the time and my beautiful baby girl was extremely colic for months and I was all alone.I was determined to breastfeed and my boobs hurt soo bad all the time..nipples cracked.bleeding...so even after the physical pain from the all the stitches went away I still held onto those damn vicodins..I am sure I was depressed too. Shoulda, would, coulda sort of thing I guess.

I have successfully stayed on the 8 mg(from the 12 mg almost two weeks ago) I split it into two does and have for most of my 'treatment". Innitially(5 yrs ago I was taking 3 does...8 mg, 3 times a day and I was higher then a kite with just one, but my doctor pushed it on me for some reason..said most of his patients needed 24 mgs)Is that bad to take it in 2 doses? Should I be taking it as one dose? I am still on the subutex, but was going to go back to film next month...It will be easier to split and for some reason the film affects me differently so I need less. I do want to go to Florida and do it there, but I am so afraid of hurting my Mom...she is so happy she thinks I saved myself from my dreaded teenage years in which I was a destructible force with no fear of anything. I would hate for her to see me like that again...hopefully she will understand.

My biggest fear is the hyperactivity turns into anxiety.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Mar 02, 2013 7:14 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Hi my dear,

You know, I belong to another forum that has a decent sized section of just 'pregnancy & parenting' issues and support. I've seen some of the Women discuss Colicky babies, for years, and I totally sympathize with anyone who has to go through that. Reading about the desperation and willingness to try anything to soothe their uncomfortable babies made me realize that it has to be one of the highest stress situations. Listening to their brutal honesty about the internal struggle to enjoy their newborn babies in the midst of the Colic chaos is also heartbreaking. So, let me take this opportunity to spin your words right back over to you, sister.. If you can make it through a complicated delivery and a Colic baby at such a young age, I have confidence that you can do anything.

Yeah, my doc was prescribing 24mg as well the first couple of years. I weaned down on my own but for the duration, I was simply taking too much. I started taking a split dose early on. It was easier for me to take less sub in total if I took both a morning and evening dose. In my opinion it's easier to taper that way but it does get tricky the lower the dose. For me, it was easier to take less in the mornings if I knew more was coming later. I hate not being able to sleep at night so I prefer to suffer during the day with a bit of ease at night. That's just me.. but eventually you have to lower each dose slowly. The film was stronger for me as well. In fact, when I switched to the film, I was really happy to learn that I didn't need as much sub and that was my first real drop for some time. It was the drop that motivated me to really taper, rather than just talking about tapering (which I did for years.. many years!) LOL

I understand what you mean about your Mom. I kept my maintenance from my in-laws because they had been through so much suffering already, couldn't bare to have to explain why we needed a medicine to be normal. But you need to do what is best for you, no matter what that is. Whether it is staying on suboxone or getting off. I have half a mind to get us plane tix and hotel rooms somewhere tropical. I did tell you I was good with kids, right? LOL!!

I'll be thinking of you because I can see your desire bleeding right through your typed words. *hugs*


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Mar 26, 2013 2:27 pm 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2013 11:04 am
Posts: 45
Location: Gulf Coast
Also, I've been trying to get pregnant (which is especially hard when my hubby is gone..lol)

^^Made me squirt coffee out my nose! Tinydancer, first of all I love the name! I stumbled upon this thread and I'm so happy I did! I don't often find other folks who have been on subs as long as I have. (almost 6 years) What I especially like about your posts is that your able to acknowlege that suboxone took you from a screwed up life to today. Does that make sense? Is it perfect, is it free from it's own harm? No. It may still be a beast but it is not the screwing up, chasing dope, dealing with shady characters, hiding from friends and family kind of beast. I have been very complacent with my treatment. I am just now realizing that I am at a crossroads, and hearing your story gives me hope that I will choose the right path.

Hip hip hurray for you! I wish you nothing but continued success! Oh...and um...your hubby will probably enjoy the experience of you getting pregnant if you wait til he gets home! :lol:

_________________
I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:49 am 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Hi mycovery!!

Yes, ones husband would need to be home in order to get pregnant, the kosher way, anyway. It's funny, my husband just ended a job on a project that actually got continued again, once he had left. HIs higher ups really wanted him to come back and keep doing what he was doing, but he'd had enough of that particular project. They were playing hard and dirty to get him back, offering all kinds of things to entice him. He wasn't going to go back but while we were joking around, I said to go with the raise (of course) but to add a clause that all shoots must be scheduled according to my ovulation cycle. HAHAHA! Can you imagine?

Yes, my life after suboxone is 100% better than pre-suboxone. I can't even imagine going to back to the places I have been, it's unfathomable. I didn't have the easiest time.. I have a love/ hate relationship with suboxone but I don't deny how it helped me. It saved me, really. I had to do a lot of work on my own but I was able to do what I needed to with suboxone's help. I am forever grateful. Anyway, I'm not a suboxone ad though, despite probably sounding like one right about now! I've just gone through my love affair with suboxone, my hatred for suboxone, and I'm on the other side, viewing it all for what it really was. A tool to get me to where I am today. Happy and healthy.

Wishing you the best on your recovery journey!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 8:03 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
8 months today..

Other than the fact that I haven't cared to get a mani/pedi since jumping (8 freaking months ago), I feel pretty darn normal. :D


Carry on...


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 10:32 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:39 am
Posts: 4028
Location: Sitting at my computer
[font=Comic Sans MS][marq=down]Congratulations tinydancer, you're rockin' it!![/marq][/font]

HEY, I haven't got a mani/pedi since jumping and I feel normal too!! Who'da thunk it??

_________________
Be kind to yourself. Our character defects do NOT define who we are!


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 11:29 am 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster

Joined: Wed Nov 28, 2012 12:45 am
Posts: 67
Congrats! ... Eight months! That is so great!
Thanks for sharing your experiences / success with everyone here! Your story is inspirational and I wish you nothing but great things in the long, sober life you have ahead of you!
I long to feel how I used to, before my love/hate relationship with opiates began...the deep, true laughter you mentioned! I miss my sense of humor a lot. I miss feeling the deep emotions in all their glory, or pain. I miss the hobbies I used to enjoy. I miss the sense of pride I used to feel in my ability to cope with life without medicating myself. I miss resting and sleeping peacefully, without the guilt of how I let these drugs screw my life up. I miss my libido.
I wish I could get eight days of sobriety at this point! It's so frustrating to want something so badly, yet feel so powerless to achieve it! I've become such a wuss! However...I will not give up! I'll continue trying and I'm very grateful to you for the hope and support you contribute here!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Congrats
PostPosted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 2:11 pm 
Offline
Moderator
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2011 12:35 am
Posts: 2801
Location: Southwest
Hey Tinydancer,

8 months is such a great accomplishment! I've been following your story since the beginning and I have nothing but respect and amazement at how well you recovered completely from all opiates. You did it the right way and are a fine example to all of us here. I do hope you'll stick around and keep posting. Not everyone will want to stop their use of Suboxone and that is their choice. But at least if they do want to stop someday we have your thread to reference.

BTW, I totally love your screen name and also your avatar picture. Where the heck did you find that one?

And Romeo, when did you start typing HTML? Plus, I prefer to call you by the name someone else here called you. Remo. Great name!

_________________
Don't take yourself so damn seriously


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 2:23 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Lookie what I woke up to this morning! Is the universe trying to tell me something? LOL (edited to remove location info..)

Image


Thank you Remo & Barely!! (Barely, I will reply to you in PM)

Rule.. Thank you for your support!! It means a lot. Umm.. my avatar pic is me. My sister snapped a picture of me walking down the street in NYC blowing a bubble. All my avatar pics have been from my phone or computer. I don't even know where you all come up with your outrageous avatars. Is there like a avatar website? I have no idea..

THANK YOU and may you all have a groovy Friday.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:15 pm 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2010 1:35 pm
Posts: 70
Tinydancer, I found your post today and want to thank you for sharing about your jump and life off of Suboxone.
I can't remember whether I've been on it for 4 or 5 years....but a long time, anyways.
I am currently weaning down from my 3mg dose to 1-1.5 before I have a hysterectomy May 29th. I took 2.5 mg for 9 days; then 2 nights ago I dropped to 2mg. Yesterday morning I was feeling some mild WD's so I took 2.5 yesterday and back to 2 again today.
I've only weaned one other time and it was from 6 mg to 1 mg for a minor finger surgery. I hung in at 1mg post surgery for about 4 weeks, but sadly I have major depression and I started having thoughts of suicide. Which sucks because I'm a psychiatric nurse! Hard to be cheery for the patients when all I could think of was my gun. :shock:
I'm hoping this time, with a longer time period to wean, and not trying to completely jump, that I won't get depressed like I did before. My post operative plan worked ut with my surgeon is to take the narcotics as needed for 2 weeks and then to stop the narcotics, wait 48-72 hours and go back on hopefully 1.5-1 mg of sub. If I can do that, and not get depressed, I will feel like a success.
Suboxone saved so many things i my life, made my current life which is wonderful, possible. i don't hate the drug, but I would like to get off it. Eventually. Probably not in 2013 while I'm recuperating from major surgery :D
Enough thread jack. Thanks for your inspiration.


Top
 Profile  
 
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 25, 2013 12:59 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
You've been making good progress. Don't worry about quitting suboxone now, just focus on what you need to do for your surgery. I'm sorry to hear the depression takes over when you get so low/ off suboxone, I can't imagine having to deal with that on top of the physical symptoms. Find things that naturally raise your serotonin and abuse them when you're really low. Sunshine, music, comedy, walking.. these things really help. I know I sound like a broken record but if you can find anything that makes you happy during the hard times, it could help.

I'm wishing you the best with your taper, I think you've got this. Slow and steady.. and hoping for a speedy and successful surgery and recovery. Here if you need anything.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 20, 2013 12:47 pm 
Offline
One Month or More
One Month or More

Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2013 7:50 am
Posts: 33
TD,

This thread is sooo inspiring to me.. I have been feeling SO hope and helpless lately.. I have been trying to ween and than find out I have to have my wisdom teeth removed, This was a huge fear of mine because I don't personally want to take pain meds right after jumping from subs. I wanted to tell you that I noticed you said your anxiety was really bad? Did that subside after stopping the subs? I have NEVER had such bad issues with anxiety until now.. Mine can get so bad that my hands actually contort and my legs are on fire due to the oxygen not getting to them because I'm hyperventalating.. I am also getting sick ALOT and I've only tapered from 4mgs down to 2 but I can tell a big difference. I am not like I used to be, Can't be in big crowds, can't read horror w/'d stories Etc. I have noticed other people complaining of this too while taking sub for more than two years.. I can't help but to believe it's involved some way shape or form. I think you are AWESOME! I just wanted to tell you that you give me great hope! I have four children and I am scared because they are all involved in something.. I can't imagine not having energy but this has been my excuse for to long. People do it daily so I am trying to change my way of thinking. I will just have to do it ya know? Well anyways I just really wanted to thank you for posting this.. It's made such an impression on me! WTG! You are AWESOME!


Brighty


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 27, 2013 9:16 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Oct 15, 2012 11:27 am
Posts: 1454
Brighty,

I'm sorry you've been going through such a hard time. When is your wisdom teeth removal appointment? I know the anxiety can be gruesome.. I had anxiety even while at a stable, higher dose.. I was given a benzo to help while tapering. I did not continue to use it though, I stopped a few weeks after jumping. It helped me a lot but I am well aware that it can be a slippery slope for many. I have not had any anxiety or panic attacks since stopping suboxone. I was not prone to anxiety/depression/ or panic attacks pre-suboxone though. Like you, it came out of the blue and was really weird to experience.

My attacks were pretty bad too, btw. I would feel like I was going to have a heart attack, my legs would get so weak they couldn't support me. My doctor almost put me on a beta blocker at 28 years old because he was worried about the stress on my heart. I've never had high blood pressure until constant anxiety.. BP is back down now.

I'm wishing you the best. Let me know how you're doing.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Help getting off subs
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 8:53 am 
Offline
New Poster
New Poster

Joined: Mon Jun 10, 2013 4:39 am
Posts: 3
I've been on Subs since 2007. Still on them I've tried to stop cold but 3rd day was too much to bear. I'd like to try the wean so I did. I've gone from over 8mgs per day down to 4 per day and feel fine now. I split a half a strip in morn and the other at 5pm late afternoon. Since on these subs, libido almost non existent, no common colds, piss always dark, always constipated, but the worst is that what used to get me so very exited doesn't happen anymore. Please tell me that I will feel that feeling again after I quit subs for good. I understand it'll take a few months but as long as natural endorphins come back, then it'll make me more strong to quit. If that makes sense to u guys I hope. Thanku for listening to me. Please respond. Anyone with experience


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 9:20 am 
Offline
Power Poster
Power Poster

Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 7:06 pm
Posts: 41
Hey Billy68,

Congrats on cutting from 8mg to 4! That in itself is progress. I always made sure that I was somewhat comfortable or stable after dose adjustments before making another cut. There was a natural progression (not forced) with the tapering and it took me about a year and a half to go from 4mg down to .75, from which I jumped. I suggest that you continue tapering, however you could always jump if you feel mentally prepared, have a support system and your life isn't too demanding at the time....it is your choice, I only suggest being prepared. Please don't jump if you aren't prepared since this could lead to some not so good ends.

I remember when I was tapering and thought to myself "damn, if I keep this tapering up I will end up staying on subs too long and my natural endorphin system will be screwed".....what a bunch of bs. I was on sub for 4 years after being on methadone prior to that and it took awhile for my system to come back online (after 9 months I was fairly solid), but after a year without opiates it is pretty much up to snuff. There were many times when I was certain that I could not receover...there was lie upon lie circulating in my head.

Simple answer is YES, you can recover and you can feel good naturally again. The right mindset, patience and perseverance will get you there. Stay positive.

Oh yeah, I also experienced some of those symptoms as well as some others, with the exception of constipation. Wasn't an issue on subs, but was with any other opioid. Everybody seems to respond a little bit differently.

Stick around and soak up some of the shared knowledge and experiences on this forum so you can make innformed decisions as you progress....and progress you will!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 7:45 pm 
Offline
New Poster
New Poster

Joined: Mon Jun 10, 2013 4:39 am
Posts: 3
To BB6. ThankU so so very much for responding to me. Just by ur response for the first time in since 2007 I feel better. No one at all knows about this. My wife, nor either teen kids I have. They'd b mortified if they knew I was addicted. I hear all that u say. I'm extemely happy that I will feel good naturally again when I quit. And I will. Soooo glad u r here and I found u guys. Ill stay in touch. U guys r all I have in this secret life living. They always comment on my tiny pupils. I feel terrible inside. I need to quit n live normal again. Ill keep on with the taper. Hope I'm strong enough. Thanku. Talk soon


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 8:54 pm 
Offline
Long Time Member
Long Time Member
User avatar

Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:02 pm
Posts: 1001
Congrats Tinydancer! That's a huge achievement.

It's really heartening to see people do well post-Suboxone. It's kinda like when you go to a meeting, feeling all hopeless about recovery, and you see heaps of people with 5+ years clean kicking goals. This forum definitely needs examples like yourself to remind us of what's possible.

I hope you stick around.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 74 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Our Sponsors
Suboxone Forum latest topics RSS feed Subscribe to the entire forum
 

 

 
Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
  • Asst Clinical Professor, Medical College of Wisconsin

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group