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PostPosted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 8:20 pm 
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Hey Kinetix,

Glad to hear from you, as always.

I'm pretty sure that withdrawal is known to raise blood pressure, it sure did for me. It got to the point where I could "feel" it. I finally went to the doctor (4 weeks after I quit sub) and he put me on Clonidine. The Clonidine helped with more than just my blood pressure, apparently the Sympathetic Nervous System gets out of whack during wd and the Clonidine helped there too.

Fairly early in my wd, I had ridiculous anxiety....it would rush up on me, but after a few minutes I was able to calm myself down. I don't know if your anxiety is the same?? Probably not.

I'm with you on the social phobia, I was talking to another member about that just today. I get nervous if I'm put in a one on one situation. I run out of things to say instantly, then when I do think of something to say, I'm afraid I'll trip over my mouth when I say it.

Your not alone about feeling 'out of place' sometimes....it happens to me too.

I have to agree with NOT taking the benzo's...they have a big potential for abuse and you don't want any part of that wd.

Love that Days of the New song!

I really hope you get to feeling better soon, but you have to remember that recovery is a process. Usually a long and slow one. Hey, check out this link for PAWS...see if any of it helps you....I found it to be amazing.

http://digital-dharma.net/post-acute-wi ... mediately/


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 Post subject: Meditiation
PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 2:36 pm 
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I'm the first to admit that I've never taken meditation as seriously as I should. This is really stupid of me. I cannot count how many people have told me that it's a miracle. Kinetix, I hope you really give it a chance and report back.

Benzos really stink to a degree. I was given Klonopin by my first Sub doctor, and he told me it was to control my epilepsy. I had to take it three times a day, and right on schedule, and I felt horrible for weeks. I didn't know it was a Benzo, or what a Benzo was until much later. (This was truly the worst doctor I've ever had or even known about.) Benzos are scary because you can actually seize if you don't take them. This has happened to me many times, and then you are in for a fall to the ground, ride in the ambulance, and hopefully someone will save you from swallowing your own tongue. Actually, for two days I haven't taken any Benzo, and so now I start paying close attention to see if I get an aura. I'd tell anyone going through Sub w/d to just be very, very careful with the Benzos, and if they can avoid them all together, then that's even better. Benzos are Xanax, Ativan, Klonopin, and Valium, and there are others. I'm not convinced everyone even knows what these things are. My husband went to the doctor not long ago and came back with a script for Xanax with three refills! WTF!!! I gave him the 411 and he didn't fill it. No wonder people get hooked on this crap. It's harder to get a lollipop out of doctors. Sorry for this rant.

Kinetix, I'm so thankful that you've continued posting. Believe it or not, if you stopped updating and disappeared, there would be lots of wondering going on around here. And worrying. It's nice when people let you know they are okay.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 3:11 pm 
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"Benzos are scary because you can actually seize if you don't take them. This has happened to me many times, and then you are in for a fall to the ground, ride in the ambulance, and hopefully someone will save you from swallowing your own tongue."

Sorry, but I just have to jump in here in the interest of accuracy. Without a doubt, you are very correct in that dependency on benzos is very dangerous and abruptly stopping them can most certainly result in a seizure. However, "swallowing your own tongue" is an old, old wife’s tale that is not at all true. Unfortunately there are people who do not know this and just about have their fingers bitten off when they cram them in someone having a seizures mouth as the person having a seizure uncontrollably bites down and won't let go. It is humanly impossible to "swallow your own tongue". What can sometimes happen is the tongue occludes the airway. However, keeping their head and neck slightly tipped back/upwards prevents this - or just turn them on their side. Anyhow, you can't swallow your tongue - and much more importantly, don't try to prevent said swallowing by sticking your fingers in the mouth of a seizing patient.

Not jumping on you laddertipper - I just would hate to see someone lose their fingers.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 9:58 pm 
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Yeah I was wondering if I'd still benefit from Clonidine. I'd have to get it refilled. I'm hoping this will pass sooner than later. Clonidine made me tired, or maybe it was just withdrawals. Regardless I think I need to be consistent with not drinking coffee, exercising, and not drinking alcohol, and then the anxiousness will go away. I read that link you gave me Romeo. It seems to be best for me to not drink, period. So i'm going to do that.

Hey laddertipper. I hear ya on how dangerous benzos are, and some doctors will hand out a prescription for anything it seems. It' a shame, because you go in thinking you're in good hands. And don't worry, I wont stop posting lol. This forum is great for sharing thoughts that nobody I know personally would understand. Well i'm off to bed, got a long day tomorrow.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 7:23 pm 
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Howdy, thought i'd check in. I've been feeling better recently, but shit has hit the fan in one department. The other day my ex that I was trying to work things out with told me shes seeing someone else. I made a snarky comment and she blew up. My heart was racing at first, but I kind of feel relieved. I feel like I can finally move on after 8+ months of a dragging ending relationship. It's unfortunate, but I actually enjoy the feeling of finding a new love, and thats what i'm going for. I decided to cut all contact for the time being. Took her out of my phone, AIM, etc. I've been doing much better at work, I've gained some weight now that I'm eating and lifting like I used to, I got some new clothes for those nights out on the town. I'm not going to beat myself over this. She said some mean shit, but I'll be using it to my advantage. I'm still having an issue with anxiety. Fast talking, sweating, nervousness and the like. I'm going to see a psychiatrist on monday to see what they have to say about it. I'm at my wits end with the sweating. If the psych suggests something like Klonipin, I might try it. When I took ativan for the first week of Sub withdrawals, I hardly sweated.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 7:37 pm 
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Dang it, I just sent you a quick PM and wish I wouldn't have suggested the two songs I just did because I am just now reading your thread. Sorry, bud.

I'm really sorry to hear about your ex, your attitude towards things just impresses the hell out of me though. I'm really impressed with your thinking.

Good luck with your appointment on Monday. I hope, with his help, you're able to figure something out.

Peace out


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 7:51 pm 
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It's all good man, they're songs ill listen to when I want to get amped up before a workout ;)


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 Post subject: Hey, kinetix
PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:12 pm 
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Thanks for the update. Sorry about the girlfriend, BUT I am excited for you because the door is now open to something new. I think cutting all ties right now is very smart. It will make it so much easier in the end. There ARE more fish out there in the sea. It's a big ass sea, after all.

I can only imagine how sick and tired you must be of the sweats. I know I'd go nuts. It's sensory integration disorder, right? I don't even get why the sweats happen. I take Klonopin and it does help. It's a lot gentler than Ativan. I took Ativan while detoxing from alcohol and it knocked me out and made me feel like crap!!!! Klonopin doesn't do that. Stay AWAY from Xanax. It's horrible.

laddertipper

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First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


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 Post subject: Re: Hey, kinetix
PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:44 pm 
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laddertipper wrote:
Thanks for the update. Sorry about the girlfriend, BUT I am excited for you because the door is now open to something new. I think cutting all ties right now is very smart. It will make it so much easier in the end. There ARE more fish out there in the sea. It's a big ass sea, after all.

I can only imagine how sick and tired you must be of the sweats. I know I'd go nuts. It's sensory integration disorder, right? I don't even get why the sweats happen. I take Klonopin and it does help. It's a lot gentler than Ativan. I took Ativan while detoxing from alcohol and it knocked me out and made me feel like crap!!!! Klonopin doesn't do that. Stay AWAY from Xanax. It's horrible.

laddertipper


Yeah it is a big ass sea. I just need to put myself out there. I'm used to break ups by now lol. Then the next relationship always seems to be better, so I'll tough it out. But yeah, I don't know if there is an actual name for the sweating condition. I want to believe its only temporary, but yeah it is extremely annoying. I wake up, go to work, i'm fine for an hour then it hits me, and the rest of the day i'm angry and self conscious about it. But the good news is I did get Klonopin. Tomorrow is a big day at work so I'm going to take one and see how it goes. The Psychiatrist i saw thinks I have very bad anxiety, and also believes it's from withdrawals + a social phobia. Probably why I got into opiates in the first place. I'm looking forward to taking it, because i've always been way too worried about what other people might think of me, and i'm hoping Klonopin will ease that. Which for me translates into 'talking to girls without clamming up'


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:11 pm 
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I've been exactly where you are. I came off 1 mg and straight to clonadine which I should have forced exercise with because I wimped out and got on klonapin twice a day. Useless. Im on 6 mg a day of sub again for pain and dropped the klonapin totally when I got back on sub after 5 months. Its real addictive and similar to drinking to me. Exercise. Clonadine. And talking to people here is best I m o :D


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:13 pm 
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I meant the klonapin is real addictive to clear that up. Sorry


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 12, 2011 12:34 am 
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Man, I thought I was the only one who was afraid of what other people thought of me and I sure thought I was in the severe minority by going stupid around girls. If a girl talks to me out in public, about all my silly mind can think to say is something along the lines of "I like marbles???" and then I would usually have to get out of there ASAP after embarassing myself so thoroughly. It's nice to know I'm not alone! I actually feel a lot better knowing I'm not alone....thanks kinetix!

I hope the Klonopin works, but please be careful, it is addictive and wd from those can be worse than opiates. Just be sure you doctor knows you don't want a 'new' dependency.

Let us know how things go with the sweating, I'm sure you're not the only with that symptom and I'm sure you won't be the last. Any info you provide would be valuable.

Good Luck kinetix!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 12, 2011 10:17 am 
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I just happened to run across this - after discussing this actual subject on another thread. Like a few others have already said, please be careful with the Klonipin. In fact, I will take it a few steps farther and would strongly suggest you re-think and most certainly research the long-term use of benzos to treat the type of issues that you have. Dr. Junig has written some great articles about the use of benzos that I would highly recommend that you read. I know that you want relief and I know that you want to feel better but in many, many ways, patients that are placed on benzos long-term for anxiety end up in the same hole that patients who are placed on opiates for pain end up in. It often goes the same way. At first the medication - both opiates and benzos - work well and address the problems. Unfortunately, and faster than you would hope, increasing doses are needed and the response is not as great. Before to long, both patients (pain/opiates and anxiety/benzos) find themselves in worse shape than they started. Then comes the long, long road of trying to get off either medication. At least with opiates we have Suboxone. There is no similar medication to treat benzo addiction/withdrawal. Although I've never gone through it, I read and hear all the time that benzo withdrawal is just as hellish as opiates. Some say it is worse.

There are other medications that can treat your symptoms - and do so more safely over the long term. Have you tried anything else? Just as I've seen comments here saying that patients should have checked first and done their homework before starting opiates or even starting Suboxone, I would strongly suggest the same for anyone facing long-term benzo use/treatment. I really feel strongly about this as does many physicians - including Dr. J. Please take a close look at the road you are about the start down before you turn onto it. I know you want to feel better - just please understand there may be a huge cost in the end.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 12, 2011 10:51 am 
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As usual, great post, Donh, thanks for your input. My favorite blog post by Dr. Junig about anxiety and benzos can be found at http://suboxonetalkzone.com/2009/12/27/ ... -you-sure/ (he has others at SuboxoneTalkZone, too). If anyone hasn't read it, I would strongly encourage you to do so.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 7:45 am 
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Thanks for the posts concerning benzos. I understand how quickly one can become addicted to them. Right now I'm taking half of a .5mg if I start to feel like i'm going to sweat. Thankfully I don't require much right now. My plan is to make this very short term. Only taking it a couple times a week for a month or two. Right now Klonopin works great for me, but I'm not going to intentionally put myself through hell again. This time around I actually know the dangers : ) But if I take one mid day, by the time the evening rolls around I feel alert enough to bust out some iron at the gym.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:25 am 
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Hey everyone, thought its time for an update. I'm still taking the Klonopin at .5mg once a day. I still get a little sweat but its so little that it doesn't even bother me. If it wasn't for all these crappy ass snow storms we're getting in New England, I'd probably be a pretty happy camper. Oh how I miss the spring/summer/fall. I feel like the Klonopin definitely helps with social anxiety a bit, or maybe its placebo effect, i'm not sure. I recall situations that would normally make my heart pound, no longer occur. Yall have a nice day.


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 Post subject: Hey, Kinetix!!
PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 4:46 pm 
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thanks for checking in!! I'm so happy you are going in the right direction. I really cannot possibly tell you how much I understand what you're saying about the weather affecting you. I am allergic to the cold, since I have been tapering. We've had a few sunny days and it's like being in heaven to feel it and to not be cold. Plus, getting outside changes everything. I'm more excited for the spring and summer than I have ever been. I'm really, really proud of you for sticking this out and also for coming back to let us know what's going on. Keep in touch!

laddertipper

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