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 Post subject: Jones-town-mafia
PostPosted: Sun May 05, 2013 2:15 am 
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Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:02 pm
Posts: 1001
Why are the hardest times the night times? When all there is is your sore sorry assed self covered in gooseflesh lieing on a mattress of some poor relative whose charity has taken you back in to get well ... one last time.

Why is there always some really bad nasty word, or song, or phrase on repeat in your head, grating on the inside of your skull like an axle grinder, and no matter how you contort your body, you just can't NOT feel its nastyness crawling around your muscles ... I remember lieing on a plasticine mattress in a shelter Salvos shelter in Sydney it was some nasty pseudo-German - .. ZUKUNG ZUKUNG ZUKUNG ZUKUNG ZUKUNG. Last night, in the relative comfort of a family member spare room, linen strewn on the floor, I couldn't get the first 2 seconds of the sax-solo from INXS - Precious Heart out of my head, stewing over Michael Hutchence's tragic end in the wee hours of the morning.

I guess I just wanted to remind you guys what it's like. What are your own withdrawal memories? Not so glossy moments of very early recovery?


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PostPosted: Sun May 05, 2013 9:15 am 
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Joined: Fri May 18, 2012 2:15 pm
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it is a wonderful sunday morning here in the mountains. Sunny.. I love sundays.. Ive been awake 10 mins with tea in hand,and the first thing i read is this new thread from my sruggleing friend from the other side of the world.i like the topic in it has me in a tear an fear.i havnt thought of my beginings of all this in quite sometime. My god was i really that sick.? Did i really become the monster this late in life? oh the mental pain of all of this. Id never gone though any kind of withdraw before.didnt know what it was. Tj,yes the worse for me was having some evil,hopeless thought repete over and over.. The horror of the past, the great losses in my life, the "how in the f ck did i get here?" runing in my head...i wish i could remember more.. As i type on this phone im getting flashes of good an bad..alone...so alone..that may have been the worse of it..... Man...maybe i should delete all this..
im just rambling in a bit.. ..keep going tj..idk man, go hit a meeting maybe.. Hope your induction speeds up for you.. Withdraw sucks..and so there is the fear. .why did this have to happen?

why does something that made me feel so good, cause so much pain?..haha.... well, have a great Sunday everyone.lol....razor R..


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Fond Du Lac Psychiatry
Dr. Jeffrey Junig, M.D., Ph.D.

  • Board Certified Psychiatrist
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