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PostPosted: Fri Jun 09, 2017 1:17 am 
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Hi Open Mind,
I know exactly what you mean about all of the medications. For some crazy reason I feel guilt and shame just listing all the meds I have been on. I still take Lamictal, Zoloft, and sometimes small amounts of Ativan and Subs of course. Something about the mentall illness realm- like, if we were a little tougher we wouldn't need all those drugs. I get those thoughts and have to talk back to them. I have to remind myself that severe depression, hypomania, and opiate binges all could end in death, jail, loss of my job, my family, my kids, on and on. And unfortunately I just can't control my mood swings or my addiction. So, I absolutely need my medication right now.

So, go easy on yourself, and know you are not alone in your feelings! Do you see an addiction psychiatrist? or a psychiatrist at all right now? It may be a good time to make sure your moods are stable, early recovery can be pretty stressful. I have found the Buprenorphine to even out my moods- have you noticed anything like that? I'm curious to know if others experience it. I also have to remember to get sleep and exercise and sleep. How do you do with those? Very important to keeping mentally healthy. Wishing you the best!


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 4:36 pm 
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Tragicom wrote:
Hi Open Mind,
I know exactly what you mean about all of the medications. For some crazy reason I feel guilt and shame just listing all the meds I have been on. I still take Lamictal, Zoloft, and sometimes small amounts of Ativan and Subs of course. Something about the mentall illness realm- like, if we were a little tougher we wouldn't need all those drugs. I get those thoughts and have to talk back to them. I have to remind myself that severe depression, hypomania, and opiate binges all could end in death, jail, loss of my job, my family, my kids, on and on. And unfortunately I just can't control my mood swings or my addiction. So, I absolutely need my medication right now.

So, go easy on yourself, and know you are not alone in your feelings! Do you see an addiction psychiatrist? or a psychiatrist at all right now? It may be a good time to make sure your moods are stable, early recovery can be pretty stressful. I have found the Buprenorphine to even out my moods- have you noticed anything like that? I'm curious to know if others experience it. I also have to remember to get sleep and exercise and sleep. How do you do with those? Very important to keeping mentally healthy. Wishing you the best!


Hi Tragicom! I also must take several meds along with Bupe to keep in check my depression, hypomania & opiate dependence. This is my life & I need these meds to keep my mood "level" (or as level as possible). I also can't control my mood swings or addiction on my own at this point. I'm actually thankful for all the meds now.

I also believe that Bupe has (to an extent) evened out my moods at this time. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Notice I keep using the words "at this time". I'm still reading & learning about Bupe so I'm never sure how I will be when I awake each day. I don't really like this, but it comes with the territory.
So I'll say to you what you said to OpenMind... Wishing you the best!

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 22, 2017 10:50 pm 
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DeeKay wrote:
I have been clean from my doc since Good Friday, April 14th. In August 2009 they discovered an enlarged ovary, possibly cancer. It didn't really hurt, but they prescribed me Vicodin anyway (7.5 @ 2 per day). Why did I even start? Went for a full hysterectomy which was botched (no cancer). Started taking Norco 10's then back to Vicodin. The next year I went for another surgery to repair the first. Didn't work. :(

My MD then continued with the Vicodin but I got used to it. So I kind of felt like I was in a semi-w/d state every day! Switched to Vicoprofen 7.5 & did okay for a bit (maybe 3 or 4 a day), but again semi-w/d feeling. Couple years down the road I asked my Dr. for something w/o Tylenol or ibuprofen, so next up 2 8 mg Dilaudid. Did well for a while then the semi-w/d thing again!!! So now I'm 7 1/2 years on opiates and feeling awful every day.

My Spouse & I own our own business & I was able to maintain my very busy job throughout (thank God). But I had a terrible spending habit & went through $$$$ like water. My brain was very messed up. I knew I had to stop. Mr Dr. had mentioned Suboxone before & I finally decided to take him up on it.

He gave me 60 8/2 mg strips and sent me home. After 12 hours off Dilaudid I put the 8 mg strip under my tongue and it stopped the cravings immediately with no side effects at all. Surely the best induction ever. Very quickly this became too strong & I began to slowly taper my dose. Had some side effects going from 8 mg to 6 mg. Was surprised. I thought the ceiling was around 4 mg. Oh well, I guess it's different for everyone. I'm now doing well on 6 mg. 4 in the AM & 2 in the PM. It's not perfect, but it's better than the mess I had made of my life.

I don't know how long I'll be on Suboxone, but if it's forever, I'm okay with that. The healing has begun.

PS. The spending was stopped in its tracks when I got off of my doc! Yay! :)

my financial problems also starting getting better. its amazing, right?? i also discovered i have an enlarged ovary with a 4cm bloodfilled cysts that alternated with a 2cm cyst on the other ovary during my cycle. fun times. i feel your pain!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 12, 2017 2:54 pm 
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SisterMorphine wrote:
DeeKay wrote:
PS. The spending was stopped in its tracks when I got off of my doc! Yay! :)

my financial problems also starting getting better. its amazing, right?? i also discovered i have an enlarged ovary with a 4cm bloodfilled cysts that alternated with a 2cm cyst on the other ovary during my cycle. fun times. i feel your pain!


Oh Sister I'm sorry to hear this. (Sorry for the late reply. I've been researching more than posting now.)

I hope you don't have to have them removed. Mine was so enlarged they really did think it was cancer. I opted for a full hysterectomy, which really wasn't needed. I so wish I hadn't done that. Hey, water under the bridge now.

I now feel that my Dr. inducted me just a bit too high at 16mg. I was only on 2x 8mg Dilaudid, but was on it for so long. I tried to quit...could not do it. So Suboxone it was.

I'm now down to alternating 5mg one day & 4.5mg for 3 days. I do believe that my "ceiling" is 5mg & I'm trying to drop slowly. Crazy thing, I'm finding myself wanting to shop again. This is just awful. Over the years I spent ridiculous amounts of $$$ trying to fill some kind of void I guess. Now I feel like I'm fighting my addiction to pills + spending money. I'm really sad about this.

I think I'm going to apply fighting my addiction to pills to an addiction to shopping. (My only sister has a terrible shopping habit too.) I can beat them both! Really trying to keep a positive attitude & make the necessary changes for a better life!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 12, 2017 8:59 pm 
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So I finally found your introduction thread Deekay :D I was prescribed 16 mg Suboxone when I first got on it last year but found out pretty early on that 12 mg was a better dose for me. I felt wonderful at 12 mg. but after just a few months on Suboxone, something told me to start cutting my dose back. I kept cutting and kept cutting it and then one day I received a letter from my Dr that the clinic that I was going to was going to close down for good. I was devastated and decided that the only thing I could do was just keep cutting back and eventually come on off the Suboxone. I only had a certain amount of Suboxone stockpiled and had a limited amount of time for a taper. Well needless to say, when it got time to jump, I could never make it past 3 days. It was terrible. I laid in bed for over a month taking Suboxone every 3 days before I finally found another Suboxone Dr that I could go to. I am happy once again now that I am at 8 mg and I am in no hurry to start tapering or even come off my Suboxone any time soon. You know I know for a fact that Suboxone helps tremendously with my depression and I am so grateful for that. Well I just wanted to give you a little history. Hope all is going well. Your forum friend, Angie


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 13, 2017 1:46 pm 
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Oh no Angie, that is just horrible. My Dr. had extreme complications from a simple surgery at the first of the year. He referred me to another Dr. right away. I was lucky. I'm so sorry you had to taper when you weren't ready. Must have been really difficult.

I'm so glad that you're doing well on 8 mg. That's a really nice dose. I stayed there for awhile, but then my body told me to taper again. I dropped to 6 mg and had some real problems. That was way too big of a drop. I went to 7 mg & did fine there, but I learned a good lesson from that. I only drop dosage when I start to have problems such as blurry vision & stomach problems. The drops are much slower & much less now. I'm feeling pretty well today. Hope you are too! Your Forum Friend Dee!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 13, 2017 3:22 pm 
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Yeah I'm feeling pretty good myself today. just been cleaning up and taking care of the dogs. I have 2 dogs and a cat. I'm sorry you had complications from something that first Dr. did. I had a reconstruction of my right foot go unsuccessfully. They re broke my foot and tried to reset it because the arch was so messed up from the car accident I was in and it was unsuccessful. I had a 4 inch rod going through my entire foot. And it was pretty much all for nothing. You never know what is going to happen when your under the knife. People always think that things will turn out as planned when it comes to things like that, but that is not the case. So how long have you been on Suboxone? Are you taking the strips? I haven't ever tried the pill form. I just always stuck with what the Dr. originally prescribed. Yeah, I have noticed the Suboxone affect my vision at times. I use my reading glasses when I'm on the computer or if I'm using my phone at home. I don't like to use my readers out in public too much. I feel like they make me look old. I'm 45. How old are you? Talking about doses. I usually stay around 8 mg as of recently but I can switch it up. Like today I took 2 mg about 8 am 2 mg at 2pm, and I will probably take another 2 mg this evening sometimes. I'm a little sore because I have been cleaning the house a lot today plus I didn't go to sleep till like 3:45 am last night because I was watching Rocking Roberta on YouTube. I actually found out about her from this forum. She was on Suboxone for 3 years and is like at day 12 on her jump, give or take a few day. But back to dosing, I need to try and stock on my Suboxone so I am taking less than 8 mg, the prescribed dose today. I'm going to try and do that the most of this month. I saved up 6 or 7 extra strips one month by taking 6 mg every day instead of the prescribed 8. I really can't tell an difference. It's when you get below 2 mg when you really start to notice withdrawal symptoms. Well I better get back to what I was doing. I will be on later. Have a good one Dee! Your forum friend, Angie


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 3:05 am 
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DeeKay wrote:
SisterMorphine wrote:
DeeKay wrote:
PS. The spending was stopped in its tracks when I got off of my doc! Yay! :)

my financial problems also starting getting better. its amazing, right?? i also discovered i have an enlarged ovary with a 4cm bloodfilled cysts that alternated with a 2cm cyst on the other ovary during my cycle. fun times. i feel your pain!


Oh Sister I'm sorry to hear this. (Sorry for the late reply. I've been researching more than posting now.)

I hope you don't have to have them removed. Mine was so enlarged they really did think it was cancer. I opted for a full hysterectomy, which really wasn't needed. I so wish I hadn't done that. Hey, water under the bridge now.

I now feel that my Dr. inducted me just a bit too high at 16mg. I was only on 2x 8mg Dilaudid, but was on it for so long. I tried to quit...could not do it. So Suboxone it was.

I'm now down to alternating 5mg one day & 4.5mg for 3 days. I do believe that my "ceiling" is 5mg & I'm trying to drop slowly. Crazy thing, I'm finding myself wanting to shop again. This is just awful. Over the years I spent ridiculous amounts of $$$ trying to fill some kind of void I guess. Now I feel like I'm fighting my addiction to pills + spending money. I'm really sad about this.

I think I'm going to apply fighting my addiction to pills to an addiction to shopping. (My only sister has a terrible shopping habit too.) I can beat them both! Really trying to keep a positive attitude & make the necessary changes for a better life!


i've been putting off going back to the dr for about 8 months now! i should have had my iud replaced last december! i was going to try mirena or an iud with hormones to see if it helps. the only thing is, i just started smoking "full time" at age 40! plus birth control seems risky for my age too. i don't want to throw a blood clot or have a stroke because of them. also my blood pressure has been borderline high. there's a polycystic ovarian syndrome. i'm wondering if maybe i have that. i've also gained a ton of weight. plus they only discovered the 2nd cyst when i had to have a catscan in the ER. i thought they wrote the results down wrong! i'm like, no the cyst is on the right. but there are 2 and they alternate.

retail therapy is good once in awhile. i love a good bargain!

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 10:52 am 
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Bamagurl22 wrote:
Yeah I'm feeling pretty good myself today. just been cleaning up and taking care of the dogs. I have 2 dogs and a cat.
So how long have you been on Suboxone? Are you taking the strips?
Yeah, I have noticed the Suboxone affect my vision at times.
I'm 45. How old are you? Talking about doses. I usually stay around 8 mg as of recently but I can switch it up. Like today I took 2 mg about 8 am 2 mg at 2pm, and I will probably take another 2 mg this evening sometimes.
But back to dosing, I need to try and stock on my Suboxone so I am taking less than 8 mg, the prescribed dose today. I'm going to try and do that the most of this month. I saved up 6 or 7 extra strips one month by taking 6 mg every day instead of the prescribed 8. I really can't tell an difference. It's when you get below 2 mg when you really start to notice withdrawal symptoms.


Oh, I have 5 cats and 1 little Cavalier King Charles named Sir Beaux. These animals are the loves of my life. Their love is unconditional. How wonderful. Glad you have yours to take care of & love!

I've been on Sub since Good Friday, April 14, 2017. I am taking the strips. I have 2 boxes of 8's saved up & now just got 2 boxes of 4's in order to cut more accurately.

I'm 58 years old and in good health. I'm married for 31 years & have no children. (We have a business) Haha I eat well because I have a cook that serves me low fat meats & veggies every day. I'm very lucky. I have many assets at my disposal.

Regarding dosing, if you're on 8 now, try taking 7. I tried to drop from 8 to 6 & had major WD's. I knew then that I was getting close to "my" ceiling. Now I know that it is 5 mg. It took me over a month to drop from 5 to 4.5 and stabilize. My next plan is 6 days at 4.5 & 1 day at 4.25. Slow as a turtle now.

I plan on it taking way over a year to be say under 1 mg. Due to the success rate being so low if you're on it less than 1 year...I plan to take that advice to allow my brain to heal!

Best to you dear!

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 11:13 am 
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SisterMorphine wrote:

i've been putting off going back to the dr for about 8 months now! i should have had my iud replaced last december! i was going to try mirena or an iud with hormones to see if it helps. the only thing is, i just started smoking "full time" at age 40! plus birth control seems risky for my age too. i don't want to throw a blood clot or have a stroke because of them. also my blood pressure has been borderline high. there's a polycystic ovarian syndrome. i'm wondering if maybe i have that. i've also gained a ton of weight. plus they only discovered the 2nd cyst when i had to have a catscan in the ER. i thought they wrote the results down wrong! i'm like, no the cyst is on the right. but there are 2 and they alternate.

retail therapy is good once in awhile. i love a good bargain!


I understand completely not getting yourself to the Dr.. After my botched hysterectomy I'm really scared of Dr.'s. But you do need to see to your IUD. The one with hormones sounds really good! I wish I could take hormone replacement, but it made me so sick.

Also, please watch after that borderline high blood pressure. My Dad had it all of his life and died of a massive at 60. So sad, he was just too young. It tore our family apart. My Mom never recovered. She passed at 80. Now's she's with Dad.

I love retail therapy too! Way too much I'm afraid. It was a horrible problem while I was on the pills. Don't know why that was such an awful side effect of opiates for me, but it was. I'm doing better on Bupe, but I'm back to shopping every so often again. Not good! Now I'm working on that too. Ugh...

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 12:44 pm 
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DeeKay wrote:
SisterMorphine wrote:

i've been putting off going back to the dr for about 8 months now! i should have had my iud replaced last december! i was going to try mirena or an iud with hormones to see if it helps. the only thing is, i just started smoking "full time" at age 40! plus birth control seems risky for my age too. i don't want to throw a blood clot or have a stroke because of them. also my blood pressure has been borderline high. there's a polycystic ovarian syndrome. i'm wondering if maybe i have that. i've also gained a ton of weight. plus they only discovered the 2nd cyst when i had to have a catscan in the ER. i thought they wrote the results down wrong! i'm like, no the cyst is on the right. but there are 2 and they alternate.

retail therapy is good once in awhile. i love a good bargain!


I understand completely not getting yourself to the Dr.. After my botched hysterectomy I'm really scared of Dr.'s. But you do need to see to your IUD. The one with hormones sounds really good! I wish I could take hormone replacement, but it made me so sick.

Also, please watch after that borderline high blood pressure. My Dad had it all of his life and died of a massive at 60. So sad, he was just too young. It tore our family apart. My Mom never recovered. She passed at 80. Now's she's with Dad.

I love retail therapy too! Way too much I'm afraid. It was a horrible problem while I was on the pills. Don't know why that was such an awful side effect of opiates for me, but it was. I'm doing better on Bupe, but I'm back to shopping every so often again. Not good! Now I'm working on that too. Ugh...


i just figured i'd make an appt for my yearly and discuss options for treating the angry ovaries when i'm there. so just a month or so longer. the iud is placed perfectly (the tech showed me on the screen when i had an ultrasound or sonogram or whatever it was) and theres no hormones in it so its not like it will loose its strength.
it was weird, my friend coached me how to get my dr to give me the iud in the 1st place 10 years ago. i was 30 and had never had kids. they're doing it more now tho. i always had problems with birth control, as in, it didn't work! it didn't regulate my cycle like it should have and i had spotting ALL the time. sorry about the tmi if anyone else is reading this too!!

not sure what's up with the blood pressure. my new dr's office isn't very high tech. they don't even have a computer! so the nurse is taking it with a cuff and stethoscope. its been 138/70 which is weird cause the bottom number is lower than normal. i guess i can ask at my yearly about that too. could just be the extra 40 lbs! my heart has to work harder.

weed was bad for me while shopping and i went christmas shopping once after happy hour and bought my mom a $20 nightlite!

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 12:34 pm 
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I applaud you for getting an annual. Just address everything with your Dr. and you'll be fine. I also got an annual 2 weeks ago at my monthly appointment. Had an EKG & everything was fine. I'm doing a stress test next month to be sure. When I dropped too fast from 8 to 6 I had a very tight chest & it really scared me. Since the EKG was fine, I expect good results from the stress test too. My BP is excellent. Thank God.

I also had blood work done to look for anything out of the ordinary. When we're on Subs we need to know if what we're feeling are side effects or something else that can be diagnosed & treated. Don't you think?

Best of luck with your annual & let us know how you're doing!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 1:11 pm 
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Today is my Birthday. It's the first in 7 years without popping pills. It's strange. I miss them. I ALMOST crave it...but I don't. The Sub IS doing it's job. However, I'm somewhat depressed over it. Suppose that's normal.

I'm sure in the months & years to come there are going to be those days that these feelings bubble up to the surface. I have a feeling I'll learn a lesson today. I guess this is what "recovery" is all about.

Anyway, I'm really missing SOMETHING today. I need to pull myself up out of this depression. It's just hard sometimes...

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 7:19 pm 
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Hi Dee! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE!!! LOL How wonderful that you shared this with the forum, though I'm sorry that you are depressed. Dee, I'm worried about you dropping your dose. I think the idea is for someone to be on Subs for at least a year before starting the taper. Of course I understand you wanting to get at a dose where you can see well and not have to have the pin point pupils that make things seem blurry. I don't know, I was like you when I first came to the forum. I had been on Subs for about 5 months and I thought that I should start tapering and taper away I did. But then I came on off due to the Suboxone clinic closing down unexpectedly. I saw right quick that coming off Subs at that time wasn't in my best interest. I just thought that I would mention this to you since no one else has. I think 3 years minimum is even better. I'm not going to think about lowering my dose until I have been on Subs for at least 3 years. But my dose does fluctuate between 6 and 8. Just trying to put back a few just in case I might need it later. Yeah, feeling the blues over our opiate use is pretty normal in the beginning of our recover so don't fret over that. Just don't act on it. Don't use another words. Well just wanted to say hello and touch base, wishing you a happy birthday. Your forum friend, Angie


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:22 pm 
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Happy Birthday, Dee!!! I hope you have a wonderful day filled with laughter, surprises, friends, and family! Are you 58 now or 59?

The best antidote for me when I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself is to try to do something active that improves the life of someone else. That's the only idea I have for now!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 27, 2017 12:53 am 
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Dee, my friend, I hope you have a wonderful birthday surrounded by the people that love you. I know special occasions can be the toughest when you are still fairly new in your treatment, like you and I are. If you're anything like me, special occasions were extra special because I'd usually take extra pills. Now that things have changed for the better, I also have to think of different ways to celebrate.

I choose to celebrate not having to lie to myself or the people I care about on a daily basis. I celebrate my new found self respect and my ability to make new, healthy and sober friends like you here on this forum. I celebrate the fact that I'm not sick all the time and always on the look out for a pill to make me feel better. I celebrate being healthier overall (despite gaining a little bit of weight), especially emotionally. All of the emotions I've been experiencing, although intense, have been therapeutic for me. I'm far from an emotionless zombie that we hear about sometimes.

Those are real, positive things to celebrate and I was only getting started. But I decided to not write you a novel (this time). Please apply some of these to your life because they can help you to feel better about yourself, and I know you've been feeling a little depressed. I want you to feel happy and vibrant and well and alive... because you are all of those things. And you are my friend Dee. Thank you for sharing this journey with me. I hope this coming year is the best one you've had yet!!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 27, 2017 7:17 pm 
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Bamagurl22 wrote:
Hi Dee! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE!!! LOL How wonderful that you shared this with the forum, though I'm sorry that you are depressed. Dee, I'm worried about you dropping your dose. I think the idea is for someone to be on Subs for at least a year before starting the taper. Of course I understand you wanting to get at a dose where you can see well and not have to have the pin point pupils that make things seem blurry. I don't know, I was like you when I first came to the forum. I had been on Subs for about 5 months and I thought that I should start tapering and taper away I did. But then I came on off due to the Suboxone clinic closing down unexpectedly. I saw right quick that coming off Subs at that time wasn't in my best interest. I just thought that I would mention this to you since no one else has. I think 3 years minimum is even better. I'm not going to think about lowering my dose until I have been on Subs for at least 3 years. But my dose does fluctuate between 6 and 8. Just trying to put back a few just in case I might need it later. Yeah, feeling the blues over our opiate use is pretty normal in the beginning of our recover so don't fret over that. Just don't act on it. Don't use another words. Well just wanted to say hello and touch base, wishing you a happy birthday. Your forum friend, Angie

Dear Angie,
Thank you for all of your words of wisdom. I want to explain why I'm dropping my dose ever so slowly. You see, I was on pills for pain for 7.5 years. I was only on 2 8mg per day Dilaudid. I never took more ever. I was prescribed them for my botched surgeries. I even had a nice stock pile in case of an emergency with my MD. Even when I had break through pain I never took more. I never got that warm comfy feeling that I hear people describe when they're high. I took them strictly for pain. But of course over time they didn't control the pain.
I tried to taper off but just couldn't do it. I really wish that I had at least tried a week detox. I really think that that could have worked for me. But I trusted my MD to try Suboxone. I wish I had done some research before starting. He sent me home with 16mg per day & off I went. I did not induct properly. If I had, I suspect I would have gotten by with 6 mg or so. That's why I dropped quickly because the Sub was just too much for my tolerance.
I didn't have to delete phone #'s from my phone, or change the way I eat (I have a personal chef). I do my work just fine. One of the main things that I've been working on is my relationships with my family. When I was in pain I may not have been the most pleasant person to be around. I believe that I was dependent. That's why I want to continue to taper ever so slowly so that I suffer as little as possible.
So that's my story. I am using the Subs to taper from the pain pills. Plain & simple. I hope I'm successful. Now I just have to figure out how I'm going to control the pain. That's really a problem. Perhaps I'll try acupuncture. Controlling my pain is how I will be successful off of Subs.
Thanks for coming to my aid when that old enemy depression hit me on my Birthday! I really appreciate it!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 27, 2017 7:37 pm 
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Ok Dee, I got ya. You didn't have the addictive traits that most addicts share. Ok thanks for explaining that. So, your not feeling the awesome feeling that most of us are feeling? The feeling of not craving opiate pain medicine? To me, that has been the best feeling that I have felt, relief wise, in a long time. I'm sorry your Dr. put you on Subs and you not really needing then like the rest of us do. Maybe I'm saying it wrong. I hope they are helping you and I hope you are getting something out of taking them. That is awesome that you have a private chef. That must be real nice. I sure hope your feeling better. Your forum friend, Angie


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 27, 2017 8:32 pm 
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6 Months or More
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Joined: Fri May 19, 2017 8:32 pm
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You should probably disregard a lot of the things I said Dee. I have to remind myself that your circumstances are much different than mine. I got a little carried away like I tend to do late at night. I guess I was thinking about my own birthday that's coming up pretty soon and how different it will be for me this year.

Because I 'took more' every chance I could get. I loved the warm fuzzy feeling that only strong opiates can provide. Our motivation is different even though we started at close to the same time. I can't tell you how many times I will be typing up a long reply to someone and at some point I'll start writing about myself. It's so weird but it just comes out some times. I've learned to just let it flow and then clean up the mess afterwards.

I still hope you enjoyed your birthday!! - OM

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 28, 2017 3:50 pm 
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Amy-Work In Progress wrote:
Happy Birthday, Dee!!! I hope you have a wonderful day filled with laughter, surprises, friends, and family! Are you 58 now or 59?

The best antidote for me when I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself is to try to do something active that improves the life of someone else. That's the only idea I have for now!

Amy

Dearest Amy,
I am 59 years young today. I think your idea of helping others is one of the best that I've heard. I used to volunteer at my local SPCA shelter. They were the best 3 years of my life! Then the botched surgery stopped that cold in its tracks. So sad. Great advice though!

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One Thing That You Can Give And Still Keep Is Your Word


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