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 Post subject: Intro
PostPosted: Wed Sep 25, 2013 5:23 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2012 5:11 pm
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Greetings!
I have been reading the subox forum for a couple of years now and thought i might "come out".
Years ago, as a young Marine, i was severely wounded, spent a year and one half in a hospital, and was finally medically retired. I had experienced numerous shrapnel wounds and much of that metal was left in my stump and arms. Aside from the normal and emotionally painful readjustment to the "world" and to my physical limitations i think i did okay. Got married, had children, went to school and went on to become a professionally trained and licensed psychotherapist. During that time i had little use or need for pain management.
During the last ten years my body started going south on me. Scars began to break open more frequently, areas on my body where shrapnel was infused with muscle, bone and nerve tissue began to cause intense and chronic discomfort. In the beginning i sought out specialists like rehab medicine, physical therapy and even suffered painful injections of various numbing agents to little or no avail.
Finally i agreed to opiate treatment. I must admit that early on a felt shame coming to depend on the opiates and resisted the process. During the last five years i settled on the same dosage i use today.
Given the current opiate- politics my sense of shame has grown even worse. I dislike having to report to my physicians office on a monthly basis to pick up a triplicate script and take it to my pharmacist who with look up my last opiate dispersion on the state monitoring database. Retail pharmacists come and go so each time i feel a certain uneasiness coming from the clerks, pharmacy assistants etc.
Even the use of the opiates at the lowest dose to control the pain fogs my brain and has, in my opinion, adversely affected my judgement in many realms of my life. I no longer practice my profession out of choice. I no longer trust my judgement. For a while i thought that Suboxne could be a medication that could both control my pain and leave me more alert. I contacted a addiction specialist who refused to see me because i was not presenting myself as an addict. Upon further investigation i discovered that the dosage required for bup to manage pain would have side effects similar to a full agonist.
So thats my story. I must admit that i feel a little trapped as a legal opiate user.
Still, i enjoy the intelligence of this forum.


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 Post subject: Re: Intro
PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2013 10:40 am 
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Joined: Fri Mar 08, 2013 1:02 pm
Posts: 1342
Location: West Tennessee
Hi Moshegirl,

My heart goes out to you. I can understand how your situation would be incredibly frustrating. Unfortunately, I know all to well the stigma attatched to anyone using opiates regularly, even if you aren't abusing them people will always assume the worst.

I agree that suboxone is probably not the best choice for you. IMO it isn't that great as a pain management drug, the doses would have to be pretty high to control chronic pain, and there are side effects for some people, especially those with a fairly low tolerance to other opiates. I must say though, that there are many people on this forum who do take suboxone for chronic pain as well as addiction, and they have good things to say about it's pain relieving properties. I would guess it can be different for each individual.

You are most certainly welcome as a new member here! I'm glad that you have enjoyed reading and I hope you continue to gain some kind of insight on your situation. You are certainly not alone in your struggles.

This may get old for you, as I'm sure you hear it all the time, but I want to thank you for your service to our country! People like you who are willing to give up their lives for the sake of making ours better are worthy of praise and honor everywhere they go, even on an anonymous addiction forum. You should be incredibly proud of the sacrifices you made in the defense of our Nation. I'm honored to have you here.

Let us know if there is anything we can do to help you. Or, if you just need to talk things out feel free to post away!

Q

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No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. ~ Eleanor Roosevelt


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 Post subject: Re: Intro
PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2013 11:06 am 
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Posts: 4127
Welcome to our forum, Moshegirl!

I want to, first and foremost, thank you for your service and sacrifice to our country!

I'm so sorry to hear that you suffer pain on a daily basis. Living in pain can make life such an utter misery! I'm also sorry that treating your pain brings you shame. Unfortunately, today's climate makes chronic pain patients live under a certain stigma. As an addict, I'm sorry that I helped create that stigma through my abuse of medication.

The good news is that there are new and better pain medications out there. My suboxone doctor is a big fan of Nucynta. I use the extended release formula on top of my sub if I'm experiencing pain from migraines, etc. It is opiate based, but has much less of the drugged feeling and euphoria. There are also coupons out there to take care of some of the expense.

I hope that we can provide you with whatever support you are needing.

Amy

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 Post subject: Re: Intro
PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2013 3:30 pm 
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Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:39 am
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Hi moshegirl,

I can't possibly do a better job than Qhorse and Amy have already done, so I'll just say thank you for your service and welcome to the forum.

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Be kind to yourself. Our character defects do NOT define who we are!


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