Hey daze! Been checking the forum every couple days, hadn't seen anything from you until today. Happy birthday, it sounds like you enjoyed yourself. Keeping busy is always a good thing for people like us, and that's great about the doctor. Not all inpatient facilities suck, I was actually at Memorial Herman in Houston, and that place was awesome (in 2009 when I went), so only you know about the facility you've looked into. It's good to have goals, and yeah I agree that sometimes it's hard to look back on the year and not to have accomplished things that you set out to do; however you are still here with us, living, which is a blessing.

Check this out, My ex-wife and I were separated 6 years ago, over two years ago we finalized the divorce (we have 4 kids together). This past Sunday, we met with the pastor at our church, and have set plans to re-marry. I was seriously lost, and depressed going through all this, but I never completely gave up hope that we would reconcile, yes I had serious doubts from time to time, but I always had an inner calm about our relationship. God has blessed me, and given me another chance with the love of my life, so hang in there. There are not usually quick fixes, but look at my situation, I prevailed, and my life is on a huge upswing right now. My God, medication, therapist, and the people in my group therapy helped me turn my life around. Yours can change as well, keep leaning on your family and close friends for support, and I will continue praying for your recovery, and well being!!!

Thanks guys!
I can't tell you how much this site has helped me. I have a really hard time being out in public & as much as I need to go to NA, I can't bring myself to sit in a room full of people. Hopefully I can get to a point where I can force myself to, but in the mean time posting here is a good alternative.

Sun, thanks for sharing your experience with rehab. I've gone through heroin withdrawals and suboxone withdrawals & the sub withdrawals definitely lasted longer, but I didn't think it was as intense as detoxing off heroin. Being sick is not something I'm looking forward to (obviously) but I'm more worried about dealing with my anxiety and depression in the month(s) following. I can barely deal with how I feel as it is, the thought of doing anything that will increase my anxiety is terrifying. I think your advice, to try the doctor assisted detox first & go to inpatient if that doesn't work, is my best bet. As I've said I have a really hard time leaving my house & being around people. I just get extra anxious & feel like I'm gonna pass out or throw up. So inpatient would be difficult for me.

On a side note; a good friend of mine overdosed and passed away Feb 27th. She just had a baby 3 months ago & was doing really well. Its a tragic reminder of what could happen if I started using again. It kills me to know that the circumstances of her death will be what a lot of people remember about her.

Hey, glad to hear the advice helped. I'm so sorry for your friend's death, that's terrible. I've had many friends die over the years too but last march (almost one yr ago) my good friend and roommate OD'd in the room next to mine and I was the one who called 911. He was so alive one day, talking about going to detox, and then dead the next morning. I went to the wake and met his family. The sad thing was that they were expecting it and almost seemed used to the idea by the time it happened. It was such a depressing thing to witness. We can't let that happen to us. After all, there's no coming back once we leave this earth! (Unless you believe in reincarnation or something
I wish you alllllll the best ok? Lotsa love.

Todd,
I didn't see your post before. Congratulations on reconciling with your ex wife. That is truly amazing & romantic in my eyes. What better way to show someone how much you care than to change your life & accomplish something few people can? Good for you! You said you had 4 kids together? That is just really amazing for all of your family. I hope your life continues to get better, it seems like it will.
And update about how things are going for you.

Hey daze, how are things going for you? Truly sorry about your friend. Hadn't seen any updates from you lately, so I wanted to check up on you. Are you still planning on going to treatment, or did you find another alternative?