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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 4:03 pm 
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I don't even know how to begin... this is all terribly embarrassing.

Let me state outright that Suboxone saved my life. I didn't even mind the overcrowded clinic I go to, the 4-6 hour wait to see the doctor, it was worth it, because I was clean and at least in that area of my life, functioning normally again. Without going into too many details, I had recently lost my family in a car accident (spouse and children) and was despondent with depression and debilitating anxiety, so working on an addiction as well was just overwhelming to say the least. So, yes... yay for Suboxone.

A while into the program, another doctor was there, able to write scripts, the overcrowding thinned, the 4-6 hour wait turned to 2-4 hours as the patients were reassigned. I was placed in the care of the new doctor. Right away I liked him. He was cheerful, funny, and kind. He was a grandfatherly type (and certainly old enough to be my grandfather). As time went on, I noticed that he was treating me differently than other patients. I would sign in, he would be waiting for me behind the desk, and motion me to come with him, even though there were other patients that had appointments at the same time, or even before me.

I didn't know what to think. I mean, I'm not going to lie, getting in to see the doctor within two minutes of signing in was lovely after so long a time spent waiting hours! But I was also confused about the preferential treatment. The first few "preferential appointments" he talked about his family, personal issues... started asking me questions... lets just say there was a definite erosion of neutrality. I thought he was lonely.

Then one day he asked to see me outside of the clinic. I said no, that I didn't think it was a good idea. Suddenly this kind, grandfatherly like man was a different person. He was questioning me again, but the questions were different. He was asking me about sexual partners, about how I groom my pubic area (shaven or not?)... I froze. All of my anxiety kicked in and I just froze. I was so taken aback, taken off guard that I didn't know what to do, what to say. I stood up, mumbled something to the effect of having to leave, and he grabbed my arm and pulled me toward him, groping with his other hand up the front of my blouse.

I got so scared... I pushed him back and said something about him "not wanting to get in trouble at work" and left as fast as I could, shaking like a leaf. I drove about a half a mile away until I could park safely and collapse into the sobs that I had been choking back. I kept trying to go over all of those appointments where we were discussing seemingly random things, where had I led him on? What had I said or did to make him think that I was interested in him in that way? He had been flirtatious, yes, but I had deflected that with humour, I suppose that's where the misunderstanding was....

The appointment after that, I was sure to make with my original doctor. When I arrived however, I discovered that doctor #2 had "switched me" to his service. Walking into his office was like walking into hell. I kept my answers short, cold. He didn't even notice! He wrote the script, I stood up and walked to the open door so he'd have to come to me to hand it to me, thinking (stupidly) that the open hallway would allow some relative safety of any unwanted advances. No such luck. He grabbed me, yanked me full into the office, with both arms pinned down, shoved his tongue down my throat, then shoved his hand between my legs. It only lasted a few seconds. Those seconds felt like hours.

I have an appointment in a few days. I am terrified to go back there. And there aren't any other docs in the area that take my insurance that are taking patients.

I don't want to ruin the mans life, I just want this over with. I also don't want to ruin my life. I was raped when I was 18 when a man broke into my apartment. I did all the right things - didn't shower, called the police, went to hospital, had the forensic nurse do the exams and take the samples... they caught him. Then when the trial came, I was victimized almost worse than when I was raped. The defense called me a whore, paraded every mistake I'd ever made out in front of the jury... Facing up to the crime and having to deal with it in public was probably worse than suffering in silence. I don't want that, especially since this isn't rape. It's probably my fault anyway, I am sure that I said or did something to make him think that I was interested.

I know that the obvious solution is to stop taking the Suboxone. I'm not sure I'm strong enough, particularly when I know that my coping methods tend to lean towards addiction.... not to mention that I don't think it would be a good idea to just quit cold turkey at the dosage I'm currently at... *sigh*

I could just use some advice.

Please.

Thanks for reading, if you got this far.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 4:52 pm 
The content of this message has been deleted because the member has been banned for troll-like behavior.

Amy


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 5:02 pm 
The content of this message has been deleted because the member has been banned for troll-like behavior.

Amy


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 5:13 pm 
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shoeswoosh- YOU are the one seeking attention. not the op. Get a life, and quit making profiles just to get
on here and try and stir shit up. semperfiguy, darthvader, winningduhepic, what do you get out of coming on a recovery forum and trying to spread your misery?.....i feel sorry for you

sospirae- the person who posted above me is a frequent troll who likes to come on here and try and stir things up, so pay no mind to him. Im really sry about the situation your in....i wish i could give you a hug. I dont really have any great advice for you, but that kind of conduct from a healthcare professional is unexceptable. If i were you i would do everything in my power to find a different doctor or at least switch back to your original doctor and make it know that you would rather be seen by doctor number 1 no matter what. You dont have to say why. just say you feel the first doctor is bettwr for your recovery. If there is a waiting list at other clinics that take your insurance i would get put on the list and just make sure you are able to see doctor number 1 until a different clinic can get you in. ((hugs))


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 5:16 pm 
The content of this message has been deleted because the member has been banned for troll-like behavior.

Amy


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 5:22 pm 
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BeautifulDisaster wrote:
shoeswoosh- YOU are the one seeking attention. not the op. Get a life, and quit making profiles just to get
on here and try and stir shit up. semperfiguy, darthvader, winningduhepic, what do you get out of coming on a recovery forum and trying to spread your misery?.....i feel sorry for you

sospirae- the person who posted above me is a frequent troll who likes to come on here and try and stir things up, so pay no mind to him. Im really sry about the situation your in....i wish i could give you a hug. I dont really have any great advice for you, but that kind of conduct from a healthcare professional is unexceptable. If i were you i would do everything in my power to find a different doctor or at least switch back to your original doctor and make it know that you would rather be seen by doctor number 1 no matter what. You dont have to say why. just say you feel the first doctor is bettwr for your recovery. If there is a waiting list at other clinics that take your insurance i would get put on the list and just make sure you are able to see doctor number 1 until a different clinic can get you in. ((hugs))


Thanks, BeautifulDisaster. I was just about to delete my post and forget it altogether after reading those first two replies. It's hard enough to even type those words, (though easier given the anonymity of the internet), reading that was just about the last straw. Thanks for replying.

I'm going to follow your advice, and insist on seeing my original doc (tho I'm sure they'll press me for a reason, since he primarily only sees new patients now) while getting on a waitlist for a new doctor. I just hope they accomodate, as they aren't exactly known to be that way. Well... fingers crossed I suppose :?


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 5:27 pm 
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Maybe I just needed to vent about what happened in the relative safety of anonymity that is the internet. "Telling" can be cathartic, you know, and perhaps I was just naive enough to think that other patients who deal with moody, pissy, power hungry (no not all, I'm referring to the ones who are that way) sub doctors might just understand what I'm dealing with.

Shock the monkey, guess I was being "dumb"

Sorry for wasting YOUR time - oh wait - you were wasting your OWN time by reading, then replying not once, but THREE TIMES. If you don't like the topic, or don't have anything constructive to add, then don't reply. Seems pretty simple, no?

Edited to remove comment by Shoeswoosh. (Amy)


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 7:50 pm 
The content of this message has been deleted because the member has been banned for troll-like behavior.

Amy


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2013 8:20 pm 
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FYI,

Shoeswoosh is no longer able to post as he/she is banned from this site. If anyone see's this person posting under another name, please contact me or any other moderator and we'll deal with it.

Sorry Sospirae, this person is a troll who just likes to cause chaos. We'll do our best to make sure your experience here is a good one.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 28, 2013 8:35 am 
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U have to forgive and forget , life going on and the past is not what determinate u future . I have many troubles in my life but I got a good gift and that is forgetting and move one , change doctor , is awful what happened to u but for real that is not the end of u life , move on ,let those memories fly away from u maind .. Don't keep thinking , don't keep talking and specialy don't share no more whit no one out what happens to u .. Unless is necessary . U not alone in this life .. Everything change arround u so let u maind change too .. Remember to stop remember ..


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 28, 2013 8:46 am 
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Cut down on suboxone , if u feeling like getting anger and a bad mood that is a sing that u doing more that u need cut down on them in to u are 1/4 of them after that u can do what I did .. I just got off .. Deal whit the lil bit of whit drawls and have courage . Good luck and stay strong !


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 05, 2013 5:15 pm 
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Someone said "forgive and forget"? Why is no one saying to report this pervert? I have been through someone groping me that I didn't want and it is no picnic and it is hell to go through. I would forgive myself for killing him and forget where I hid the body.....There is NO excuse for behavior of that nature. Contact your state medical board and have him arrested for sexual harassment. Period. If he done it to you, I am sure that he has done it before. I couldn't live with myself to keep it quiet and someone else have to go through that mess. Just because we are Sub users doesn't make us any less of a person, we are still human beings with feelings too. REPORT HIM!


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 05, 2013 6:24 pm 
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the good wrote:
Cut down on suboxone , if u feeling like getting anger and a bad mood that is a sing that u doing more that u need cut down on them in to u are 1/4 of them after that u can do what I did .. I just got off .. Deal whit the lil bit of whit drawls and have courage . Good luck and stay strong !



So, being angry about a supposed professional that you pay (good money, at that) to help with a viable health problem, and them using their "power" to make sexual advances and be a total pervert is wrong...that's not something anyone should be angry about. But instead, if this happens to someone, they should immediately drop their Suboxone dose, risk relapse, and possibly death from overdose if relapse happens (because 90% of people who stop Suboxone without the proper tools will relapse within 6 months to 1 year)...

This just doesn't sound like logical reasoning to me. Telling a person who had a doctor basically sexually harass them that they should lower their dose of Suboxone if they feel angry about what happened...just puts all the responsibility for a perverted old man's behavior onto an innocent woman who just wanted professional courtesy.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 06, 2013 1:14 am 
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John, I was scratching my head over that one as well. Not saying that it is a stupid response, but it damn sure aint the smartest thing I have heard today thus far and my husband is a bit touched in the head LOL, but I love him. I would have went home, grabbed the keyboard and found the number of the State Medical Board. I understand this is a sticky issue, but no professional I don't care if they are giving you the meds for free has the right to do something like this. There is no excuse. Just some old pervert that thinks he has a one over on someone because they are paying them for a service. He probably thinks that this person wont say anything and that is keeping him in the clear.
You can always knee em in the twig and berries, I got a list of things you can do....Lol. Us women have to stick together. Like I said before, the next time that it happens tell him if I ever have to deal with this again. I will forgive myself for killing you and forget where I hide your body. You make the choice whether you want this to be your last day as a doctor. I just take someone sexually harassing another very very seriously. I went through it for 12 years at home, this is NOTHING to screw around with.
You can look for another doctor, but why would you risk tapering off or relapsing? *Scratching head*
Please report this guy, even if he doesn't get his license jerked if there has been a report of him doing it before and you report it, someone might come in and watch things or pose as a patient to catch him. I have heard of it happening before.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 06, 2013 9:00 am 
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I love it PBM!

"If this happens again I will forgive myself for killing you and forget where I hide the body!"


:lol:

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 08, 2013 8:42 pm 
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pitbullmomma34 wrote:
Someone said "forgive and forget"? Why is no one saying to report this pervert? I have been through someone groping me that I didn't want and it is no picnic and it is hell to go through. I would forgive myself for killing him and forget where I hid the body.....There is NO excuse for behavior of that nature. Contact your state medical board and have him arrested for sexual harassment. Period. If he done it to you, I am sure that he has done it before. I couldn't live with myself to keep it quiet and someone else have to go through that mess. Just because we are Sub users doesn't make us any less of a person, we are still human beings with feelings too. REPORT HIM!


Amen Pitbullmomma! I just had to say this. I am new and just joined last night and have been trying to read up on everything and this post was really starting to piss me off...pardon my French. I am sick of how other people and professionals look and treat those of us who are on Suboxone. Between treatment from nurses during my hospital stays to pharmacists and their assistants, (several stories there). Being on Suboxone does not mean we just stand by and let other people who think they are better than we are treat us like crap and do things to us to make us feel bad or even worse about ourselves. Especially sexual harassment and molestation.

Ok...done venting. Thank you!

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