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PostPosted: Tue Oct 02, 2012 7:22 pm 
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Hi everyone, I have a question.

I have been reading posts on here for about two years where people say "suboxone is running my life" or "I am sick of being a slave to sub."

I guess I am wondering what people mean by this. I understand if a person has to go to a clinic every day to get their dose. But how does sub run your life if you go to the doctor once a month and pick up a script?

I hope I dont sound like a brat.....I really want to understand what they mean.

Thanks!


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 02, 2012 7:35 pm 
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Hey Orange doll,

Yeah, I lot of people here say things like that. Personally, I don't feel that way and never have. To me, suboxone is like any other medication that I have to take daily and get refilled monthly. But with me, I actually take other meds. Maybe people that feel that way don't take other meds? Maybe they feel tied to their doctor and pharmacy? Plus I usually have some kind of extras so that I don't have to time my trips to the doc/pharmacy to the exact day and maybe that makes things easier for me, too.

It probably has to do with the fact that they'll have to wean off it, too. Again, that's just par for the course and it doesn't bother me either.

Otherwise, I don't exactly get what they mean either. What I said above is just my theory; I could be way off base. I'm curious to see how people will explain what they mean by it.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 02, 2012 8:28 pm 
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From what I can tell, people can't stop using drugs and go on suboxone. Or whatever happened, some go right on to sub without trying to stop ther drug of choice. There's other ways of course but those two are most common I think.

Suboxone then gives the illusion that they are kind of 'cured' or that they are feeling what it must be like to live without drugs, but then they realize they have to take sub every day or they will go thru withdrawal. It's easy IMO in that situation to forget how rough it was back on drugs. Also sub has some side effects that can be bothersome.

A lot of them say they should have "just went cold turkey" off of whatever oxy, Vicodin, percs, etc.. They may or may not realize that's so much easier said than done and if it would have been an option, why not just go back on oxy and then taper of that or go cold turkey.

Also they are not realizing the paws and depression will happen from full agonists like oxy and Vicodin or heroin, making the likelihood of using again very high so going "cold turkey" had a bad chance of long term success for most of us.

Also I find people with this complaint are blaming doctors for "tricking" them and saying sub has no withdrawal. There are many sub docs who don't know jack but it's easy to research thus stuff first before making this major life change. And I think blaming others for our problems is something that we need to get over before we can start to recover from this disease.

When I was about a year in on sub, I had a strong desire to stop it. But I wasn't ready. At that time I tried to taper but it was too hard. After another year and a half I was ready to start tapering and it was fairly easy to go from 8mg to .2mg in about 8 months. You have to learn how to cope without that old mentality truly I believe to be able to taper of sub but it can be done. We know this from here on the forum.

That's my quick thoughts orange doll

-glen b


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 02, 2012 8:59 pm 
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hat and glen,

You guys bring up some good points. I hadnt really thought of some of the stuff you guys said. I was also thinking that maybe people are over thinking taking the sub. Since I have been on it over two years,have no side effects, and dont really "feel" my dose, I mostly forget about it.

Like hat said i take other daily meds too so im used to it.

hmmmm...thanks for your thoughts.


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 Post subject: My Experience
PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 12:16 am 
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For me............I traveled alot with my job. We were expected to be in the field 3 out of 4 weeks in a month. Even though I had great insurance.........My sub doctor charged $185 plus $25 for a drug test.........Things were ok for a while when I had insurance and my suboxone cost me $40. However I had to sign a contract that I was not allowed to change my appointment dates and missing one appointment could result in dismissal of the program.

I remember my doctor saying even if it is not true if we receive a call from someone saying your are abusing or selling your suboxone- we don't investigate we just drop you. I was shocked and prayed I didn't have any enemies at the time. He is retired now so I am not sure things have changed. Now that I don't have insurance thankfullly my pharmacy allows me to buy my subs a week at a time. A couple of months back I got a call and was told to bring to the office within 24 hours 18 subutex. I tried to explain that I buy my subs weekly. The lady on the phone said if I did not bring in 18 subutex within 24 hours I would be terminated from the program. Of course I did not have the money to buy 18 subutex and I think aat the time I had 5. When I showed up I was asked to wait in the waiting room and when I tried to explain why I only had 5 and I had my bottle showing how much I had left for the month which added up to 18 I was told I would have to see the doctor and then they tried to charge me $185. At this point I had it and I said I am not paying anything............common sense read my bottle ............call the pharmacy...........finally the doctor came out and I let loose on him and said this is bull shit.......After I explained everything to him ..he said no problem and said I was good and NO ONE apologized............

Example this week I have 16 subutex at the pharmacy. My dad was placed on life support this weekend. He has lung cancer. The pharmacy said you just filled 7 the other day. I told them I have to go to KY to be with my father and not sure when he is going to pass. There are no riite aids where he lives and I didn't even want to try to transfer to CVS.After 25 mintutes and a call to their District Manager he finally agreed to fill a legal prescription and I was on my way. Yes I have to plan my trips, vacations or anything else around my sub doc appt and getting my subs. Hopefully I will have a job again soon with medical and I wont be so broke all time...........but i understand when people say they feel they live thier lives around sub appointments and thier medication..............hope this helps.

Jim


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 2:02 am 
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oh Jim,

I am sorry to hear about your dad. It sounds like you are going through alot right now.

I am so glad you told me your situation with your job and your sub doctor. I can totally see how sub takes up alot of your time and energy. Your doctors office sounds really strict. I am so used to my great sub doc I forget everyone isnt so lucky. I just comend you for dealing with all this in your quest to stay sober.

I am trying to become less judgemental and not assume stuff about people. You really made a difference for me tonight. Now when I read that sub is running peoples lives I will not make assumptions.

Thanks Jim and I hope you are getting some good support right now. Take care of yourself.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 5:15 am 
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Thanks everyone who's sharing. I think it's so important for us to communicate how things differ for us, or frankly we'll just never understand another's perspective. And that's a huge part of living a healthy life as we recover.

Jim, my gosh, I'm dreadfully sorry about your father. I went through the very same thing with my dad several years ago. I remember what it was like so I know where you're coming from and how you might be feeling right now. And to deal with your doctor's bullshit like that while trying to get to your father, well, I'm just sorry they put you through that. I hope you get to spend some quality time with him and your family. You and he will be in my thoughts.

Back to the subject...Jim, do you take other meds? When I have to go out of town, planned or unplanned, I've had problems getting meds ahead of time too (not suboxone), so I'm just curious if you're on a bunch of other meds, too or not. I just wonder if a young person is only on suboxone and has never been on any other meds, then I can understand how taking ANY med and having to deal with what comes with it would be a real drag - add to that the things that go with suboxone, and I understand a bit more. But for old folks like me who've been dealing with necessary meds and doctors and pharmacies for years, it's way less of a big deal to us. That's why I asked if you're on other meds. But in your case, that doc of yours sounds like a real piece of work and that alone would probably put me in the same state of mind, to be quite honest.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:12 am 
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My former Sub doc disappeard off the face of the Earth a couple of times. No one answering the phone during office hours, no calls returned for TWO WEEKS. The last straw was when I needed a refill and his DEA number had expired. You're right - you don't think much about it when you just go once a month and everything is normal. But the first time you are faced with running out, unplanned, while on a high dose - that's when you realize you utterly dependent you are on the medication.

Jim - I'm sorry about your father. I really took off with the opiates when I lost my father. So, please, take care of yourself during this time. Do what you have to do for your recovery. Please post soon and let us know how you are.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:19 am 
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Sub is definitely not ruling my life, not like heroin ruled my mind and my life and my actions and turned me into an asshole.

But is Sub "running" my life? I dunno I haven't really heard that expression before. If I interpret it like .. Sub is running my life like petrol runs a car ... then fuck yes. I am dependent on Suboxone. If I don't take it, I break down and don't operate for a couple of weeks at least, then when I can run again it's in poor condition for a long while. I was faced with this issue over Christmas where I realised how daunting the thought of being with Suboxone is when we're faced with the situation.


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 Post subject: other Medications
PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:53 pm 
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Yes I do take other medications monthly. However it is not as much as a problem as with sub. The reason is like you Hat my PCP understands my situation and usually will write my script out with 4 refills. This cuts down on my number of visits and makes it easier to transfer a prescription if out of town.

With sub my doctor refuses to write refills......you must come monthly...you must pass the drug test and pay for the appointment to get the script. I heard one person say my unemployment check did not go into my account and they said it will be tomorrow before it does. They told her to go ahead and see the doctor and come back (it takes me almost an hour to get to my doc) tomorrow and once payment is made then we will give you a script........WOW.

Yes it is better than being on herion on back on pills daily.........but it doesn't mean I have to like it..........

Jim


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:18 pm 
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I kinda smiled when I read the original post because you folks who say Suboxone doesn't run your lives are just as confusing to us folks who say Suboxone does run our lives. :D

"Run our lives" may not be the most accurate description, but I get the gist of what you're trying say OrangeDoll and here's my take on it.

With Suboxone, I had to drive almost an hour each way to get it. Any of my other meds, I went to my doctor right here in town. When I got to my Suboxone doctor, I had to pay cash money to see her. From day 1, having to pay cash for my doctor visits made me feel like a scumbag who couldn't be trusted. All my other doctor visits, I only pay a small co-pay. Once I got in to see my Suboxone doctor, I had to take a pee test. Not the highlight of my day to pee in a cup and give it to a nurse to examine. Then, after listening to my doctor talk to me like I was basically a low life and getting my script, I had to trudge over to the pharmacy and endure the dirty looks from the pharmacy tech's when I handed them my prescription for Suboxone. This all only happened once per month, but it was enough of a drag that about a week prior to my visit each month, I'd start thinking about all the crap I was gonna have to endure to get my meds and like Lilly, I always worried that this Dip Shit of a doctor would up and disappear on me.

The things that "ran" me daily were having to take a sublingual medication. Having to wait while the effin' ORANGE TASTING CRAP (lol) dissolved in my mouth, trying carefully not to swallow any of my Subliva (thanks for that one TJ!!). Any other med I took, I popped it into my mouth and swalllowed......BAM, done, AND NO ORANGE TASTE!!! lol

Even though I wasn't really a pain patient, I took my Suboxone three times a day and did that little routine three times per day. Some people say they let the Sub stay in their mouth for up to 1/2 hour.....that's an hour and half each day spent taking a medication. I know you can walk and type and do other things while Sub is in your mouth, I'm just talking about the hassle of it all.....and that damn ORANGE TASTE....lol....that's the last one....I promise!!! Actually, I liked the taste of my Sub's.

Then, if I ever wanted to go anywhere, even somewhere not too far from home, I had to make dang sure I had my Suboxone with me. No other med I've ever taken (except pain pills, obviously) did I have to make sure I always had access to. Any other med I've ever taken, even my blood pressure medication, I could easily skip days because I would forget to take them. I NEVER missed a dose of Suboxone, I was afaid if I missed a dose, I would start to feel wd.

If we wanted to go away for a week or so, we always had to plan our trips around my Suboxone doctor appointments and pray like mad that my Dip Shit doctor didn't call me and reschedule my appointment for the middle of my vacation.

Also, with Suboxone, I often felt that I had to hide my medication when folks came over. I had heard so many stories of people stealing Suboxone from people's houses that I would hide my meds when people came over.

Lastly, and I don't mean this towards you or anything, but while on Suboxone, my counselor always warned me that if I got pulled over, I could get a DUI for being on it and that scared me.

So, if you look at all of these things I've typed out, Suboxone was on my mind a lot throughout any given day and that's how it ran my life.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 10:22 pm 
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Hi guys,

Im glad I asked this question. Im getting alot of great answers!

Romeo, I can totally see what you are saying. My doctor is in a family medicine group with lots of sub docs. They also do general stuff. They take my insurance. I pay nothing for sub. Ive never had to worry about this doctor flaking out on me cause the practice is so big.

I also dont travel that much.

I am realizing how damn lucky I am today!

Yeah the dui stuff is a problem. I signed a thing at court that I would not drive on prescription meds that will impair me. Well Im still on sub so a.cop could say i was impaired. I would go to jail and loose my licence. I take that chance every day.

It sucks that sub treatment is so hard to deal with for some of us. This thread really opened my eyes. Thanks.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:11 pm 
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Harden up guys.

If you think Sub is running your life. Spare a thought for us in the UK and Aus who gotta pick up our fucking dose from the Chemist ... At least 3 times a week. Then when we get there we gotta line up behind the methadonians and other Subbers and wait while on display to all the normal chemist customers who always get served first ... even if we've been waiting for 20 minutes.

We're also not allowed to browse the chemist unsupervised.

Jeesh. Think u got it hard? :lol:

Sorry if I'm sounding combative but Subsux has inspired me to be more of an asshole.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 1:55 am 
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Your right TeeJay, that would be a PAIN IN THE ASS........

what do you mean, your not allowed to 'browse' unsupervised??? like walk around?????

LOL
sorry, you just TOTALLY lost me, there.

That sucks, though. for SURE.

Im LUCKY, too. I get along really well with my doctor, he has a sliding scale and he's about 5min from my work.

MY PERSCRIPTION, on the other hand, is over $500 bucks, a month.
but like reraise, I can buy it 'as needed'
So, that HELPS, a whole freakin bunch.

And, I usually only have to see the doctor every third month, but he started me on ADHD meds, so Im seeing him agian in only a couple weeks.

This has been a really interesting thread though. to see everyone's different 'journey'
I like how the commercials make it sound so INCREDIBLY easy ,,, on the radio.
LOL
I guess if they explained all this stuff we've said here, NOBODY would call, LOL

But, your right, BEATS THE HELL OUTTA active addiction!!!!!!!!!!!
back then, I could make $500 worth of pills disapear in maybe two days,,,, three TOPS.

glad that's over.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 3:26 am 
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We're not allowed to browse unsupervised, presumably because people on the program steal from their chemists. Which I have doubts about, because I don't think any recovering addict would be stupid enough and put their place on the program on the line by stealing from their own chemist, when there's so many other ones they could thieve from...

I do make it sound bad, and it can definitely be bad at some pharmacies... fortunately my pharmacy is quite friendly and I have a good relationship with them... and it's only 100m walk away.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2012 9:07 am 
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Sub(and methadone) ran my life (for 13 yrs) by being a medication I HAD to take to prevent getting physically sick. I felt I was under its thumb. It was the first thing I thought of in the morning. I had to plan vacations and travel around my dose. I'm only 24 days off opiates but I already feel freer in many ways. It's still tough...I definitely have that "empty receptor" feeling, like something's missing, but I'm hopeful things will get better.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:08 pm 
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i don't no and may be an ass hole but". i'm glad i'm not on cancer medication and blame that for running my life :lol: and sorry about your father jim. :( i no how suboxone treats us all some what different .but being addited to drugs and alcol- is a very bad life threat to us and keeping up what we have today for treatment is a must. i have some post about me sorta against suboxone but now being on it so dam long and trying to get my shit together and working on all the other medications
i can't really blame subs to much finding it was not the subs and was the other meds and my problems in general.

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:18 pm 
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That's a good point johnboy, Sub doesn't run our lives anywhere near the way drugs and alcohol did for some of us.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2012 6:00 pm 
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I think all of us would agree that Suboxone doesn't run our lives like our drug of choice did, I think we were all just answering the question of this thread, How does Sub run your life.

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2012 3:00 am 
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:idea:

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