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 Post subject: Hello from MS!!
PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2012 11:42 pm 
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Joined: Fri May 04, 2012 10:29 pm
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Location: MS
Hi ya'll! :D

I'm glad that I found this forum!! Looking up info on sub on the internet I stumbled onto this forum. I registered the 1st day I found it but for some reason I never got the confirmation email to activate my registration, not sure why but I waited in case I was just being impatient. Finally I used my 2nd email address and instantly got the confirmation, so :? that was kinda strange but anyhow. While I was waiting I read through a lot of the threads and I feel like I kinda know ya'll already.
I will share my story in a couple of days in that area of the forum, but just wanted to introduce myself with a short version. I've been addicted to pain pills since 2007. I did go to rehab in 2008 when my family realized one day what was going on. I guess really I did know that I was addicted but just didn't wanna admit that. This all started during my pregnancy with my youngest son when I started having severe migraines which they assumed were pregnancy induced & would go away once the pregnancy was over. Needless to say that did not happen. The medications that are normally given for migraines aren't safe to take while pregnant so their choice then was to give me pain medicines. It started out with just Lortabs during that time. When the pregnancy was over though that changed to Percocet, Stadol nose spray, & alas the lovely Dilauded. I also started hospital shopping, doctor shopping but then it was minimal. Well once I went to rehab in October 2008 and then relapsed since then its been basically whatever I can get my hands on. That is mainly Lortab or Percocet & some wonderful times I get the Dilauded. :roll:
I have 3 wonderful boys ages 14, 8 & just about to be 5 year old. I've been married for 12 years in June to a great guy. He's still here with me even though he lives with an addict :shock: . I've done all the I promise this time is it, I won't do this no more & I'm done a million times. As all of you know when I say it I really mean it, I mean who wants to seriously be an addict. I'm so ashamed of being an addict, it has dragged me down so hard. I'm at the point where I'm a recluse who sits around on my hind end basically 24/7. I'm just sick & tired of being sick & tired, ya know? These drugs have turned me into a horrible person. I've lied and stolen to feed my addiction. I don't care for anyone else or anything and I hate feeling like that. I've always been the mom to do everything with my kids and I was such a good mom. Now that's far from the truth, I basically ignore them & I feel so guilty & ashamed of that. I'm also not a wife to my husband at all. He works hard to pay our bills and buy the things we need but I snatch the money up for pills & more pills. I don't want to be this person, I don't want to be this way. It's something I am so ashamed of and I think I use the pills to not have those feelings also. I don't take care of my home, I don't clean or cook or nothing. Hell I barely bathe myself much less take care of my home. I don't live I just exist. I want my old self back!! But of course I'm the victim here & want nothing more than to wallow in my self pity & expect everyone else to be miserable too!! :roll:
During my time at rehab, sub was mentioned to me that it may be something for me to look into. The amount of pills I take basically depends on what I get. Like today I only had 15 Lortab 5/500's & popped all of those which worked for a few hours. If I have Lortab 10's or Percocet 10's I'll pop anywhere from 10-12 every 3 hours or so. Anyhow, so when I saw my dr after getting out of rehab I asked him about the sub & was told that was really for addicts using street drugs such as heroin so I took it at that. Then last week my cousin was talking to me about everything and she told me she knew that it was for any opiate addict whether it was pills or heroin. So thus I began my research & it kinda ercks me that he told me that & knowing I possibly could've went that route & be doing well.
I began also searching for sub drs in my area & did find a few. I called a couple of them to find out the cost, around here the price basically is the first visit is 250-275$ & then each monthly visit after that is 125-130$ & they don't even accept insurance to see if it can be covered so ok I'll pay!! I looked at my prescription coverage & found that it does cover sub with a prior authorization that the dr has to call to do & they only cover so many a month too. I was excited to find that out. So I'm hoping to get an appointment within the next couple of weeks to start sub. I can't tell you how ready I am to try this!! I just want help, I can't keep doing this anymore to not only myself-my body but more importantly to my family. They don't deserve me being like this at all. I'm so grateful to still have my family because I know there have been so many others that have lost their families.
I look forward to getting to know ya'll & the support I see you share with one another. I'm sure I'll have ?'s & concerns that I feel confident ya'll can help me with. From all of the things I've read so far this seems to be such a caring & wonderful group of people. I can see that you understand & have been there so who better to help me!! :D


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat May 05, 2012 3:22 am 
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Welcome, Amylou! I'm glad you found us! This is a wonderful site with tons of both scientific and experiential information. There is so much wisdom and support here! You will read about the positive and negative sides of sub. Some people have had great experiences with sub, and some consider it like a monkey on their back. You should definitely check out the Induction threads. Unfortunately, some sub doctors don't seem to have the most up-to-date information. When you get in to see a sub doc, for example, ask him/her how long will you will be taking sub. Are they flexible about it? Do they have a strict protocol that all patients must follow, or can your treatment be more individual. Another example, some sub docs think it's fine to wean down to 2mgs and then quit cold turkey, which is extremely difficult for many sub users. I'm sorry if I'm kind of speaking a "foreign" language to you, but you will be an old hat at handling it soon! Take care and ask lots of questions!

Amy

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat May 05, 2012 4:45 am 
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Location: Southeastern US (Alabama)
Good to see someone from MS here...I lived in MS for about 3-4 years and we moved to AL when the flood happened back in 83/82..something like that...

Anyway, I got all kinds of family in MS...Foxworth, Jayess...Gulfport...

But I mostly go visit my dad in Slidell when we make our visits to that area. Nothing like going to LA..love it.

Pills are a black hole and a never-ending struggle to get them. Let us know how things go...It'll be interesting to see how you turn things around once you get stabilized on Suboxone. Feel free to ask anything you want to know about.

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 Post subject: Howdy Neighbor!
PostPosted: Sat May 05, 2012 11:07 am 
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First a big welcome to the forum. I hope you find the right doctor and are able to get in with them sooner rather than later!

Secondly...I live in TN...VERY close to the MS border at Alcorn County. Are you in that area? I know in the area I live in pill use is RAMPANT. Everybody and their brother takes pills. We were at a ballgame the other night and one of the dads was bragging to my husband that he had just gotten his refill that morning. Even offered some to my hubby. WHAT A FREAKIN IDIOT!!!! I'm surprised my husband didn't punch him in the face and warn him to stay away from me as much trouble as we have been through with my addiction. He didn't tell me about it for a couple of days. Some people don't think before they speak...

Anyway, welcome again. Ask away if you have any questions!


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 Post subject: Thanks!!
PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 12:46 pm 
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@Amy- Thank you!! Those are great questions I will definitely write some down that will help me when I go for my appointment. I've been reading a lot of the forum & the induction threads so I've gotten some good info there.

@johnathan- Howdy!! I've lived in MS all my life except for one or two years in AR & TX!! I'm actually in the NW corner of MS about 35 mins from Memphis, so Gulfport is further south than me. I'll keep everyone updated on how things are going for sure, I'm sure I'll need advice from everyone that's been through before.

@qhorsegal- You're not far from me, I'm in Desoto County! About 30 mins or so from Memphis. And you're right, pill use around here is very rampant!! We must have some gullible doctors or something. I honestly didn't know how bad the situation was until I became an addict. It's unbelievable how horrible the situation is. I'm not sure if that's basically most places but I just know in our area it seems like a big epidemic.

Glad to be here!!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 1:11 pm 
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amylou81 - That's disturbing that your doctor told you that subs were only for people on drugs such as heroin. I wonder how many other patients he has said this to, who could have benefited from sub treatment and who are still in active addiction?? I'm glad you did some research and found out that they have helped many people who have never even touched heroin or other 'street drugs'.

Glad to have you here! Let us know if you are able to make an appointment for induction.


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 Post subject: Welcome
PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 1:19 pm 
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Hi Amylou and a big welcome from the western part of the U.S.

You say you've been reading a lot of posts so I won't even try to give you any info, just ask us any questions you may have and I promise you will get some answers.

But please keep in mind that what you read here is only opinions of other addicts and not medical advice. We do tend to know a bit more than the professionals only because we are the ones taking Suboxone. Dr's can read all they want about it but it really comes down to experience. There are a lot of good doctors out there who have been prescribing Sub for years and do know a lot about it.

The one thing I will suggest is, do a cross reference with available Suboxone doctors and ones that are covered by your insurance. There aren't many, but I have found one in Ca. and one in NV that will accept my BCBS insurance as paid in full. Blue Cross also covers my medicine and with the discount card I pay nothing for it. To be on Suboxone only costs me the $25 co-pay every month. It took me two days of calling to find mine in NV. I started to lose hope because they all wanted cash up front and I just don't have that kind of money anymore. Worst case I would have drove the 5 hours back to Cali to see my old one.

Both of the doctors I found were D.O.'s. Just regular GP's with a kind heart. Basically, you are looking for a true to heart healer.

Let us know when you are going to see the doctor. Your life will be given back to you as mine was. If not for Suboxone I would have lost my job or been put in jail or..??

Rule

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2012 11:04 pm 
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@taurus- I wondered that exact same thing!!!! I'll gladly let ya'll know what find out about an appointment.

@rule- Thanks!! I think I may do just that & find if there's a dr that's covered by my insurance that will prescribe suboxone. Should I call & ask if the dr there prescribes suboxone? I'm guessing not just any dr can do that??


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