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PostPosted: Sun Jan 01, 2012 7:03 pm 
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Helloooo forum friends. Happy Wonderful New Year! I just wanted to update the forum on my taper. I am still at .25 mg twice a day. I feel stable although I do get tired at times still. By the evening I start feeling the withdrawl set in, so this is why I split my doses. I do not have any concrete plans as to when I will decrease my dose again. I really just wanted to get thru the Holidays and feel as good as possible. I am glad they are over. I am going back to Bikrams yoga today and there is a LOT of sweatting involved, so once I see how my body will tolerate the very intense yoga practice, I may decrease my evening dose by half. I will certainly keep ya all posted. I cant think of any real big news to share other than I am at a stable place in my treatment. I do think about H but I do not crave it. I also think about the reasons why I choose sub treatment over using. That pretty much keeps me straight. I went thru HELL as all of you did and now that I am essentially clean, I am happy, healthy, social, supporting my family and living a very good life. Why would I wanna f*** that up again? I dont!!!!! Thanks to sub I have found a calmness about drugs and realize that even if thoughts come, they will also go. Especially when I keep myself busy.. Bless all of you and have a wonderful 2012...


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 08, 2012 9:27 pm 
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Hi all.
Yup here I am again. I thought I would not be ready to taper more from my HUGE jump from 1.25mg down to .5mg. It felt like forever to stabelize and for nearly a month I was dead tired. I mean I went from 125mph down to 50mph. That is exactly what it felt like. Not much in the way of physical aside the exhaustion, but I felt great during the day (after a nice couple cups of espresso) Come early afternoon/evening I was on my a** (ass guys) I thought about using H lots. I thought about using pills. (painkillers) I thought about increasing my dose. I thought about this and that, but I kept on keeping on. I read thru Laddertippers taper and realised that I might as well take another drop. Couldnt hurt. I'd been functioning and getting on with my everyday life. Time is a passing and I want to get a move on, ya know? I am ready to travel the road less traveled. I am ready to follow my words. I am ready to get off this fu***ng suboxone and be done with it. So I am now on day 4. YES day 4 of decreassing my evening dose of .25 in HALF.
So I am on .25 in the am and 1/8 (what is the decimal for 1/8 anyone know??) in the eve. I have just barely started to feel some discomfort in my legs and lower back. Slight and i mean SLIGHT sleeping disruptions. (I take xanax nightly and have for 2 or more years but not a lot. In fact, decreassing this slowly as well.) I cried the first night of course because I watched a bunch of sad stuff on youtube. Why do we do this? I mean it felt great to cry and it sorta made way for more LAUGHTER. I have with each drop, become more and more who I REALLY AM!!! I am loving music, I am loving sex, (yes sir!!) I am having fun. I started yoga again and I am on an ultra healthy diet of fresh organic juice and vegetarian goodness. I am smoking more weed (yes. this is one of my New Years resolutions, to smoke more... ha ha) It is legal here in Ca and I have a legal perscription so I smoke weed. It helps a TON! I mean it's the lesser of all evils for me. That is for sure. I do not know when I will step off suboxone. Perhaps I will decrease my morning dose although i SOOOOOOO look forward to it now a days. I am gonna just taper taper taper (slowly of course, I ain't no dummy) till I am done. SO there ya have it. Until next time ..Blessings to each and every one of you here. You are appreciated.....


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 08, 2012 11:55 pm 
That's good shit sweet16!!

Glad you're doing well on your taper.1/8 of a mg = .125. Ive gotten down to .75/day myself.

The exercise and fruit intake and other healthiness..feels good, don't it? I am not one for bikram yoga, but I like to go to the gym and hit the elliptical, do free weights, crunches..I have a little routine down. I was running but it's too high impact for me.

I get the cravings sometimes..weed actually helps me with that. You're lucky you live in an MMJ state. I don't, but my
doctor knows I smoke. He shares my belief that as ex junkies, people who used to stick needles into their arms (well thats me), if we wanna smoke a little something that isn't physically addictive and virtually harmless compared to the dope, it isn't such a big deal. I know for me, when I smoke, I think a bit about the things I used to do and feel sickened. It doesn't make me want to use heroin at all.

We actually have a lot in common. You take Xanax, I used to take klonopin, stopped for a year, started again with Ativan 2-3x per day, and now (I believe partially thanks to weed) I am down to once nightly 15mg temazepam (all prescribed, for documented problems). I would also like to eventually taper off of that as well.

I think I feel better the lower I get, too! I definitely felt better at 2 mg then I did at 8 mg.

Can I ask, how do you take your Sub? The liquid thing is such a pain in the ass, but it works..


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 10:36 am 
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sweet16 wrote:
Hi all.
Yup here I am again. I thought I would not be ready to taper more from my HUGE jump from 1.25mg down to .5mg. It felt like forever to stabelize and for nearly a month I was dead tired. I mean I went from 125mph down to 50mph. That is exactly what it felt like. Not much in the way of physical aside the exhaustion, but I felt great during the day (after a nice couple cups of espresso) Come early afternoon/evening I was on my a** (ass guys) I thought about using H lots. I thought about using pills. (painkillers) I thought about increasing my dose. I thought about this and that, but I kept on keeping on. I read thru Laddertippers taper and realised that I might as well take another drop. Couldnt hurt. I'd been functioning and getting on with my everyday life. Time is a passing and I want to get a move on, ya know? I am ready to travel the road less traveled. I am ready to follow my words. I am ready to get off this fu***ng suboxone and be done with it. So I am now on day 4. YES day 4 of decreassing my evening dose of .25 in HALF.
So I am on .25 in the am and 1/8 (what is the decimal for 1/8 anyone know??) in the eve. I have just barely started to feel some discomfort in my legs and lower back. Slight and i mean SLIGHT sleeping disruptions. (I take xanax nightly and have for 2 or more years but not a lot. In fact, decreassing this slowly as well.) I cried the first night of course because I watched a bunch of sad stuff on youtube. Why do we do this? I mean it felt great to cry and it sorta made way for more LAUGHTER. I have with each drop, become more and more who I REALLY AM!!! I am loving music, I am loving sex, (yes sir!!) I am having fun. I started yoga again and I am on an ultra healthy diet of fresh organic juice and vegetarian goodness. I am smoking more weed (yes. this is one of my New Years resolutions, to smoke more... ha ha) It is legal here in Ca and I have a legal perscription so I smoke weed. It helps a TON! I mean it's the lesser of all evils for me. That is for sure. I do not know when I will step off suboxone. Perhaps I will decrease my morning dose although i SOOOOOOO look forward to it now a days. I am gonna just taper taper taper (slowly of course, I ain't no dummy) till I am done. SO there ya have it. Until next time ..Blessings to each and every one of you here. You are appreciated.....


LOL, you're so funny. I'm glad you're doing well. Awesome job on your diet and healthy habits. I cannot tell you enough times how much easier that will make this on you. After going through this, I've realized it keeps coming back to eating right, exercising, etc.

You are doing fantastic. I am actually happy to hear that you are smoking more weed and taking less Xanax. I wish this was more the standard for medical treatment. I mean, should a doc give a person benzos first or a script for weed first? I vote weed. I'm a huge advocate, at this point. Just because it comes in a pill and you get it at a pharmacy does not make it the better option.....not by a long shot!!!

You sound great. :D

laddertipper

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First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 11:38 am 
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Sweet16,

You ARE tough as nails. You got the bull by the horns AND you're bitch slappin' him at the same time. Rock On dude!!

I hear ya on the loving music and having the sex drive come back. During the acute phase of my wd, I had the good fortune of recording a Stone Temple Pilots concert from MTV. I swear, I watched that concert hour after hour, night after night and it was one of the only things that kept me sane during that awful acute wd. I had some Joan Jett, Iron Maiden and some Scorpions videos that I would watch over and over again too. Since being off of Suboxone I have bought somewhere in the neighborhood of 20 new cd's. I hadn't bought new cd's since the 90's!!! And the sex drive.....I quit Suboxone at 43 years old, but my "privates" were acting like they were 17 again!! My wife and I have been enjoying the hell out of that!!

I love your New Years resolution, it made me laugh.

You're doing really, really good. Just keep moving forward at your own pace and before you know it, you'll be there.

One suggestion I would like to make is to have a good recovery plan in place for when you're off of Suboxone altogether. You've had some cravings for some H and for some pain pills. You're gonna have those cravings for a good while probably and you're gonna have to resist them. I have no doubt in my mind that you can resist, I just want to give you a heads up.

Peace Dude.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 12:05 pm 
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Hi there wonderful people
Ironic, I take my sub strips sublingually. I am on the 2mg. strips and every few days a take a couple strips and cut them to size & stick them in my stash box. It feels kinda like im doing something bad.. Lol, addict behavior. To be chopping up a medication and then to take a little here and a little there. But it is working. I often wondered what the liquid taper method was like. I am glad it is working for some. The tiny pieces of the strip melt so fast, it is hard to believe that my body is actually absorbing it. I would love to take an entire strip some days, but I am on a mission so I will be a good girl. CONGRATS on being down to .75mg. It gets easier to taper in my opinion at these small doses only because for me, the reduction is much much smaller and even though I do feel it, it is only slight. The healthy diet and exercize is good stuff. I love Bikrams because I know I am sweatting out some nasty toxins. Anything that works for you as far as physical activity is the way to go. Keep up the good work Iron' keep us posted on your taper. (Do you have a date set in your mind of when you plan to be off? I am just going w/ the flow myself...)
LAddertipper~ Thank you bunches. I really did read thru your taper thread and it gave me a push to taper even though I was tired. I read your most recent post and it SUCKS that you are feeling residual ill effects. Man what gives?
The weed thing, well I have smoked weed for years and years. When I am on other drugs I notice that I stop smoking weed. Even when I am using alcohol regularly, my weed intake decreases. I know that (for me)weed takes the edge off. AND it IS the lesser of all evils for ME. I do occasionally get anxiety feelings from weed, so my remedy is to vaccuume. Lol It takes my mind off the anxiety and the loud sound drownds out my negative thoughts. (Least I have clean carpet). There are THC pills and edibles (cookies, brownies, baked goods even speghetti sauce) available here at the dispenseries (weed store) So if people do not want to smoke their weed, they can ingest it easily. YEAH, you know Pharmaceutical companies want to keep us on their pills and strips, or they would loose a shit-ton of revenue. I wont go into it here, but there is some pretty alarming facts about Pharma co. and the monopoly they are engageing in. I say if you can do something natural and organic versus chemical/synthetic, why not go for the natural route?
Well again thanks for the kind words and I hope ya all feel better and do what is best for your own recovery. What may work for some may not work for others... BLESSINGS ALL!!!!!!!!!!


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 12:55 pm 
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Rome my man, thanks for your super duper advise. HA HA you are a funny funny guy! Lucky you and your wife are enjoying the awsomeness of teenage sex again (only with skill ha ha)...That is really wonderful and to know you have been married for a long time and still wanna do it! ha ha.
I could seriously bitch-slap a few things around right about now, but I wont as I am far too nice. But I want to. (kinda like not using. It just isnt a good idea, but boy would it feel good)
I will certainly brainstorm and come up w/ a plan to stay clean. I am ultra busy, have a business, 3 kids, travel, beach, bills bills and more bills and some very needy friends. (they gotta go) These things keep me looking pretty straight ahead. I have no room for detours. YUP! I have had some thoughts of using. I seriously doubt this will ever go away completely. I was a very heavy meth/H junkie from 15-18 yrs old. I was slamming dalily 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 times a day. (i dont know how I survived really) It took me 6 years to completely feel normal after quitting.(I quit because I hit bottom then started having babies) I had thoughts of using, cravings, whatever ya wanna call it, for years and years. Of course they lessened over time in strength and freequency. I guess I just have the ability to fast forward to the end result and then I choose to NOT use. In the recent past (from 18 till suboxone) I occasionally (actually rarely) would partake if the opportunity arose, but all in all I never really had a serious issue till this last episode of H and it was an every day thing for 3 months without a break in between. This is why I choose suboxone, I did not want to go thru WD. ( ha ha yeah right) Now I have had this experience (sub). I am by no means out of the water but I feel I have a pretty good handle on the situation. I have goals and this seems to be what keeps me from getting involved in drugs in a way that could cause me to loose it again. (or any way for that matter) I really appreciate your advise. I know it is something I need to act upon, not sure in what form other than keeping busy and focused on the prize (which is to pay off debt and make money)
THANKS so much..
OH I did want to mention, for the first time since being on and now tapering off suboxone, I have experienced mild to moderate intestinal upset. No hershey squirts, but loose bowels and some cramping. I am sorta happy for this because I was seriously backed up while using and I never seemed to eliminate as much as I thought I should after stopping. Just thought I would share as I have commented that I have never experienced poop issues. Now I feel like I am in the club. haha.


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