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PostPosted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 10:57 am 
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Romeo wrote:
Hey Sunshiny Rainbow,

So, so glad to hear you are doing better!

Ugh, the shakes....ANNOYING!! I had them for quite a while. Clonidine helps calm that symptom GREATLY. It's the nervous system trying figure out what in the heck is going on. Technically, I believe it's the Sympathetic Nervous System. Anyway, I remember shaking like a leaf while trying to eat my cereal in the morning, it took both hands at times to get the cereal to my mouth without shaking it all over the table top. If it gets real bad, try some Clonidine.....after talking to a doctor first of course. BTW, I eat Rice Krispies, I know you were just dying to know that!! :lol:

I love your plan. It'll happen when it happens....well spoken.

OK, is your name pronounced ree knee? Growing up amongst French folks, I'm used to pronouncing it ra nay.....not that you can actually hear me when I say your name! :lol:

Again, very glad to hear you are doing well.


I love RICE CRISPIES!!! LMAO!!! Thank you Romeo, you've been such a wonderful ray of sunshine to me, forgive the cliche', but it's so wonderful! Yes you got the pronunciation right on, it's Ree-Knee....Ree-Knee Rose LOL It's a family name, my Grandmother, and Aunts name. I get a lot of funny pronunciations..but mostly "Rainy" LOL My closest friends and family just call me Ree.
But anyway, I once again digress! Since I've posted my dr. has called me back. On Monday when I saw him he prescribed an additional .1mg of Clonodine for the am as well as the dose I was already taking at bedtime, however I did not add it to my regimen. So he suggested that I do it no matter what and that should alleviate all of the symptoms I'm experiencing. He feels that since I feel I am able to keep going this way I should stick to the 1mg/.5mg dosing, but add the extra clonodine. I was at first questioning if perhaps I should steady at 1mg daily, but for now I'm going forward this way. I definitely still want to be suboxone free, but I realize that my body and mind is so far dependent on it, that I can't risk losing things, and effecting my daily life while doing this. I have to keep focused on my priorities, and realize that I have to continue living my busy daily life, while I detoxify from the subs.
Last weekend I just wanted off, no matter what, I wanted to say I'm off of everything!! But, I fast realized that was foolish, and not going to help me long term. So for now I'm on the slow and steady wins the race motto, and will just keep that as my motto for as long as I have to, to get where I'm going with this.
I'll always be thankful for Suboxone, no matter what anyone says about it. My Dr. couldn't of said it better when I was discussing with him what my Mother felt about sub...He said "Everyone is different, and those who have not been in a certain situation just do not have the means to understand your story" and for some reason that rang a bell in my head, and made me worry so much less about what others "think" of me. You see, my anxiety has always controlled me. It's always had me fretting about what everyone else is thinking of me. So I tend to over-react to things I'm doing, and punish myself because I "THINK" someone ELSE is thinking bad about me. It's a struggle for me to just do what I want to do, and what feels good for me and my body without taking into consideration what anyone else is thinking first. So it's no surprise that I've digressed in my journey or pushed myself too far too fast in hopes to eleviate what others are thinking of my sub journey. I have to realize that this is me, and I have to do this my way, for my body, and that is it. I hope this is making some sense. LOL I tend to have alot on my mind at once when I'm typing!
Anyway, let me stop this ramble, I just wanted to thank you for your encouragement, and kindness...You are a wonderful person, with a lot to give, and I appreciate you more than you could ever know!
Rainbow :wink:

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 1:02 pm 
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You are going to make it. I absolutely believe that. You aren't pushing it too hard, just hard enough. You're working out and keeping busy. You are basically taking .75 a day by alternating the two doses. It may take a while, but you will get used to this dose. I'm starting to actually believe that again. I had my personal doubts for a while, and I'm still at 1, but now I can see a little light off in the distance. I had to scrap my 'jump date' because I came to the same conclusion as you. I want off Sub NOW, but I cannot mess up my life doing that. So, it needs to be slow and steady or nothing. In the end, I think that will means less PAWS for us, because when you consider how much discomfort we experience from one little drop, you have to conclude that there is a lot of progress in all that.

I haven't gotten the shakes yet. I wonder if I will. That's weird. I didn't know that was something that could happen, so thanks for bringing it up because I probably would have thought I was having little seizures if that happened to me. Phenergan suppositories work wonders for barfing. I shoud check the thread to make sure you haven't already said you are taking them. And as far as the Clonidine goes, I understand not wanting to add something, but right now, you need it.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 5:43 pm 
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Aww Ladder, you ROCK! I love how we have so many things in common. I'm actually surprised at how much I have in common with you, and some of the other members here. It's the greatest comfort that I think I could find right now. You're doing so super too girl! I was actually thinking of your situation, and how you did have disomfort at the level you are on, but I was wondering if that has to do with how long you were on it? I'm so curious about that actually. Like say I were to stay at the doses I'm at now for oh idk a year say, would I then have more trouble in a year going further down, then I would if I wait say 3 months from now and taper again? If anyone knows that on here, I'd love to hear your thoughts. I do know that everyone is different believe me I do! I just am somewhat curious on different timing aspects.
After I had heard from my dr this morning I took the other .1mg of clonodine, and it took all the symptoms I was having away, the shakes were gone within an hour. That was scary, and you know it's so funny (ladder) that you said you'd think you were having tiny seizures, well here's a funny one for you, I totally THOUGHT THAT! I didn't want to say it, but when you said it I was like YES YES me too! It scared the sh** out of me girl! OMG and you know I'm a nurse, as I've told you guys in earlier posts, and it doesn't matter how much knowledge I have with others and there medications and what not, but when it is happening to me or my direct family it's like all of my training flies right out the window!
I suffered a siezure when I was on the high levels of tramadol. That was actually what in turn saved me from a life of using tramadol b/c it took me finally to the place where I wanted no part of that life anymore. But honestly I'll always be haunted by that siezure. I won't even tell you all the details of it b/c it was horrifying. I think I will always be haunted by that experience.
Anyway, there I go digressing..sheesh I gotta stop doing that!
I think you and I both will get there soon, but us not having a "date" so to speak, takes so much pressure off doesn't it? It's like when I finally said that to myself it was like "phew" ok I can carry on now. LOL
I'm feeling great tonight, and did for the rest of the day after the clonodine...I'm so glad I called the dr b/c I would not have taken that extra dose.
Hope everyone is having a great start to the weekend!!
Hugssssss!!! Rain

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 7:47 pm 
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Yes, we do have a lot in common. Seriously, people with problems are the coolest people in the world, lol.

I do think it makes a difference how long someone is on Sub. I'm just one majorly confused person at this point, though, because I've called so many places and asked so many people. Nobody agrees. There's no expert who will explain it all to you. Some will scare the pants off you. There is absolutely such thing as too much information. I feel like I'm just flying blind at this point, but I'm flying in the right direction (I think).

You know what? I actually did have epilepsy after my head injury (in 2005). I didn't know it. I had a bunch of small seizures, but I just thought my hands and legs were acting weird or something would twitch but I'd write it off. Then, I started passing out. One time, I was feeling sick, so I got a bath ready and BAM! Woke up next to the bath. I'd 'passed out' and I'd even peed my pants! The next time one of those spells happened, I got lucky because a friend was over and I felt that weird thing and the next thing I knew, the paramedics were hauling me off to the hospital. I'd had a really, really long seizure, but she saw it so I knew it wasn't fainting. It was scary. The good thing about opiate detox is that, unlike alcohol w/d, you don't seize from it. Thank goodness!! I'm glad I now know to expect the shakes, because even though my EEGs have been clear for a long time, I'm never really all the way out of the woods.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2011 5:52 pm 
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Hi all!! Wow it has been a busy few days for me!! I can't wait to finish posting here and see how you are all doing too! :) Anyway, Friday I started taking clonodines twice a day, and all the symptoms I was having immediately went away, so I just thought I'd give .75/.5 a try, I've been cutting my 2mg strips..I figure if/when it starts to feel bad I'll stay at the 1mg/.5mg for a little longer, but convinced myself that the .25 I was taking away couldn't be all that bad right?! LOL Well I haven't felt it yet, but that's not to say I won't start feeling it soon, but if so I'm ready. I've prepared myself with work, and even signed up for a marathon that's coming up at the end of April, so I'll have something to train for, and hopefully keep my mind off of the inevitable. I can't help but wonder if I give myself some of the symptoms, just from anticipatory anxiety. I have a feeling I do that.
With all of that said, I have also found a few things, this weekend that have made me feel even better. Well, I don't really do the ultra vitamin deal bc they have a tendency to make me sickish to my stomach. So I started trying some different teas, Green tea, definitely calms the jitters and makes you relax, as well as sleep time tea...Sleepy time tea and a hot bath and you'll be sleeping like a baby! Also ginseng, they have these ginseng infused candies that you can get at the Whole Food market, and I have to say I felt pretty good all day on Sunday, and I was feeling a little tired when I woke up, but I stayed active, and had a lot of fruit, and protein throughout the day, and I was feeling great. Better actually then I have in 2 weeks, so I think it did have some impact on that.
Anyway, I know they may sound silly, but I just thought I'd throw whatever out there I find helpful. Sometimes it's the smaller things that help get you through the day to day things right?
Hugs!!!

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2011 7:46 pm 
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Yay for Clonidine!! It's pretty weird how a BP med can make such a big difference in wd symptoms, eh?

I'm going to try the Green Tea, since my lapse/binge/relapse, whatever the hell it's called, I have went back to having some jitters again and some sleep issues....I might as well pick up some Sleepy Time Tea too.

I'm so glad to hear that the Clonidine is working so nicely for you.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 13, 2011 4:26 pm 
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Well, it's Wednesday, and I have been doing the .75/.50 for 4 days, and tonight will take my fifth daily dose of that regime. I have to say I haven't felt a thing since Friday. I'm assuming now that it's the clonodine. I think that the .1mg a day just wasn't enough for me, so adding that extra dose did it. BUT....I know I said I didn't feel anything, and that's true, but them damn smells got me last night. It's funny about the smells really, it makes me believe that there are so much suppressions going on throughout my entire body, that I won't feel who I really AM without any type of opiates until the time when I am off.
So with that said, feeling a little discouraged that I can't just jump and be done, but I know what that would do, and I don't intend to go there. It has been an over bearing thought, however, that will not leave me. I have some issues with self worth at times. I've always been that way. Self esteem and I have issues. I have a tendency to give myself major crap for not just jumping and getting it done, but in reality I know far to well that I would NOT be able to suffer through the month or more of pain from w/d. So I just have to try and keep on keepin' on, but I guess since it's been so long since I went to the 2mgs and now to here, it feels to me like I got another year of this atleast. So yeah I'm discouraged. I do however, no longer have tummy troubles...That has also dissipated, so that is always a plus. I am not jittery, nor do I feel anxious, so everything besides the smells is all good. Right now it's just me staying focused on being patient and not rushing myself. As I said in an earlier post, I signed up for a marathon and started training with a buddy for that, so that is going to keep me very busy in between work and my family. So hopefully I won't have too much time to think about what is going on, or how much time has to pass until I've reached my goal.
I do have one question to throw out there though, and that is, what are the chances if I go down to .5 daily, or regulating at .75 that things would change? I'm sort of stuck on the idea that the every other day thing will help me to get lower faster, but I don't really know that for sure, other then my doc recommended it so I did what he said. Actually, it probably does make sense in that if I contine to fluxuate, it will stabilize at the lower dose, and therefore I will get to go lower with more of an ease. Did I just answer my own question?
Well anyway, I hope all of you are having a good week thus far! The weather here has been so awful it has me completely depressed, and running in a parka is like running wrapped in saran wrap. I am sure I'm sweating out lots of toxins though, so that's a plus. LMAO!
Hugs everyone!!!

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 13, 2011 6:41 pm 
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You know what? The bottom line is that you are doing very, very well. You've decreased your dose rapidly. I think the fact that you were at 2 mg for a good while has set you up to be successful. You said you're frustrated because it's been a while since you went to the 2 mg and now to here, but it really hasn't been long at all. I feel like I wish I was more like you....seriously!! You are maintaining your resolve and really pushing through regardless of your symptoms. When you are done with this taper, you can channel those energies into staying off everything and I 100% believe that you can do that.

The self-esteem thing is a tough one. I'm kinda in a really rough spot in that regard too. If you start feeling too down, it's better to take a break and assess where you're at. I think alternating your doses is a good idea and will make staying at .5 much easier on you. If you start to feel burned out, it's not like you are failing if you need to rest at a dose for a little while. It's really not a very good idea to just jump, because it could send you through an emotional turmoil. Why do that to yourself. I like livin's approach. Just keep on like you're going and if you need a break, take one. I don't think you have another full year ahead of you. Now way.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 1:51 pm 
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Thank you so much ladder!! You're doing so well too!! I find alot of similarities in you and I actually! LOL I hear myself in so many of the things you write about your life, and your experiences coming off of the sub. I swear I do not know what I would do without you guys! Romeo, Aqua, YOU, mg113, all of you!!! I love coming on here and reading what every one is experiencing...it makes it so much more helpful to be prepared then to come into it blindly. I honestly can tell you had I not found this particular place, I would still be on the 2mg. Perhaps indefinitely. I was functioning as normal as I thought I should be, and had no particular intentions of weaning....but now that I have started, and yes I have my very bad moments, and days, but it's NOTHING like I had once thought it would be! Hell I just expected it to be like my migraine maintenance med, that you have to wean off of, but in 2 weeks time! I would have tried that, and I cringe at the thought of what would have happend to me.

Anyway, it's another day for me, and I still feel great. Ofcourse I have my cherry chapstick up my nose, but that's it. LOL OMG I have a little bit of a funny story, I have a puppy, she's 4 months old, a little pekingese, and she is crazy! LOL I was holding her, and she darted at my face and started licking my NOSE! EWWW I freaked! She was ready to have dinner on that cherry chapstick nose of mine!! LMAO! OMG I was so hysterical I nearly peed my pants! I thought that I must really be taking drastic measures here, walking around with cherry chapstick for my nostrils! LMAO LMAO!! ahhh gotta love the humor in it I suppose!! Otherwise I'll consider myself completely nuts and throw in the towel!

I am training again with my friend for the marathon that is fast approaching. That is a huge help. It's keeping me focused, and plus the extra protein in my diet seems to help alot. I've been drinking the sleepy time tea every night now before bed, and have slept like a baby, and wake up feeling so good in the mornings! Work has been good too. One huge plus, is that when I was on the higher doses of subs, and even the 2mgs, I would always sweat so much, and that seems to have completely gone away on these doses. I actually find myself feeling cold again where I was always feeling really hot!

So everyday it seems I find a new plus to being where I am.

Hope you all have a fantastic day, and keep on truckin!!!! There is always tomorrow if today isn't perfect!! Can't go wrong that way!

Hugs!!!!
R

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:45 pm 
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Just my opinion ( I am a workout FIEND) your running is whats gonna get you thru this ........ I dont know about you but I get the adrenoline rush from working out ( I also take creatine and glutamine prior to my workouts) and it overpowers the crappy wd feelings I have.


One day at a time... and I am not sure about you but I have to remind myself about the drama associated with addiction and not to fall into the viscious circle of it lol..........when I feel crappy I tell myself its the flu and take dayquil or nyquil ( they both help me with the aches ) and the clonidine helps too.

Yesterday was my skip day and I was ok till the evening.. then a simple hot bath took away the aches and pains I was feeling.....

every day your one day closer to your goal............you can do this..... we all just need to go at our own pace... we are all different and have different lives so hang in there your time is a coming

:)
Lisa


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:19 pm 
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Hi Lisa! The running has helped me tremendously!! Last year when I was at 6mg and going to 4mg, I had sprained my ankle. (oh what a story that is LMAO!) and I was unable to run for 10 days, and I can not even describe the pain in my body, and mind as well. It was killer!! I had the worst muscle cramps I have ever had in my life. Though at the time I had no idea it was the fact that I had gone down from the 6 to the 4, I thought it was just from going from running 4 to 5 days a week, to not at all, and that was wacking out my muscles. In hindsight I now realize it was the drop in dose probably more so then the change in running....

Plus running is just therapuetic for me in general. I blast my ipod, and run as fast as I can. I sort of imagine all the layers of stress pealing away.

Since my earlier post, I had a very bad two hours. I lost a patient today, one that I have known for over 10 years now. I'm not taking it well to say the least. My boss asked me to leave work, b/c he was worried I was putting up to much of a front that it wasn't bothering me and he said he worried I would collapse with sadness from holding it all in. He was right, b/c as soon as I hit my car I couldn't stop crying, and have been ever since. I just adored that patient. He was the most wonderful, happiest care free person on this planet. He would smile no matter how sick he was. I mean he had 100% Failed kidneys, and had no function what so ever, but I can not think of a day that he didn't have a smile, and something awesome to say. When I was still working, oh gosh this is probably 8 years ago, it was not long after I met him, so 8 to 9 years ago, anyway he found out that his kidneys had stopped functioning and were down to 95% disfunctional, and that would mean he would have to have a transplant.....So anyway about a year into that, he found out he was no longer a candidate for the transplant for various reasons, but one of them was b/c his heart was not doing well...(alot of patients have difficulty elsewhere after being on dialysis for so long, especially with the heart b/c it is so hard on the heart, and blood pressure.) anyway, he came in to his normal session with Rose's and chocolates, and handed a Rose to every patient and member of the staff. On each Rose was a card, with a little inspirational quote by him for each individual person. This is what mine said" Rene, maybe I can no longer have a chance at removing myself from dyalisis, but I get to come in and see your smiling face everyday, so I'll take it----when the going gets to bad, embrace a friend, b/c they will make the next step so much easier to endure." I have kept that card in my bible for the last 8 years, because I thought to myself, he could have just called it quits, he could have been so damn mad...Denial even, but no instead he just dusted off, and put a smile on, and never took it off for the entire time I knew him. When I returned to work, I was so happy when he was on my rotation, b/c I draw so much inspiration from him...I just feel angry, and sad, and mad at the world that someone so special had to have that. He had the kidney failure from mistreated blood pressure, and it's medications throughtout his young adult life. Anyway, I'm sorry I'm rambling so much right now. It just hit me very hard, and I'm really going to miss him.....His name is Charlie, so maybe someone could say a prayer for him, to fly away on the wings of an angel, and be in the arms of God for a while....if anyone deserves it, it's Charlie.

Thanks for reading this guys....I needed to get it out.

Hugs...Rene

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:28 pm 
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Rene,

I'm so sorry to hear about Charlie passing. My thoughts and prayers are with you and his family.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 5:48 pm 
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I am so sorry, too...I know that is a rough time to lose a patient. God Bless you for the work you do.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 1:25 am 
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Wow, tears....that really got to me. What an incredible person. People like that almost seem like they aren't human. They are part human and part angel. It's very interesting how peaceful he was and yet it makes you so angry. How was he so peaceful? I don't understand that. It makes me think he knew something that you didn't know. It's like God had leaned down from Heaven and whispered a secret to him and he had to keep the secret, but whatever it was, he knew it was all going to be okay in the end. I already said my prayer for him. I have a feeling he's doing just fine. How nice for a person to be remembered in this way once they are gone.

laddertipper

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 9:35 am 
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I grew up with Pekingese dogs....love those little fellas :) I had to smile at the Cherry Chapstick story...my dogs do the same thing! Hubby is addicted to that stuff too...I buy it in 3 packs for him :)

I agree...don't know what I'd do without you guys on here....how comforting it was to have somewhere to come when experiencing withdrawal. How comforting to have others going thru similar things....you get to bounce stuff off each other and not feel like a "weenie" LOL!

rain, I find it no coincedence that a few of us joined this forum at just about the same time. It's like we were supposed to find each other to give support! I can't believe I happened upon here with some incredibly nice and knowledgeable people.

I tried other internet forums and they were soooooo negative....I posted once or twice and didn't go back. I don't want to have a "whine" festival...or a "sub hate" forum. Sub is not bad! Sub allowed me to withdraw off the hydro comfortably. It allowed me time for my back to heal to a point where I no longer need chronic pain meds. It allowed me to get past the chronic depression that chronic pain causes. Yes, we have to "withdraw" off the Sub too....but at least, we get to control that! We could not control the other.
Some, like hatmaker, choose to stay on Sub. Isn't it great that she has that option? To find a medication that she can use to help with chronic pain and be on it the rest of her life...hey, I was right there with her a year ago. Thought I would never get relief from chronic pain any other way. I find it wonderful that she is so supportive of us who are trying to taper.

This really is about as good as you can get in a public forum for being unbiased, non-judgemental and knowledgeable support. I cringe at some of the things I read at other forums...all kinds of home-made, made-up ways to taper "fast", crazy ways of using opiates to taper off Subs...I have never seen anything posted here that was not sound and medicallly good advice.

Hope you have a great day today....storms where I'm at...thunder and all that good stuff!


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 Post subject: Re: Charlie
PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 9:38 am 
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laddertipper wrote:
Wow, tears....that really got to me. What an incredible person. People like that almost seem like they aren't human. They are part human and part angel. It's very interesting how peaceful he was and yet it makes you so angry. How was he so peaceful? I don't understand that. It makes me think he knew something that you didn't know. It's like God had leaned down from Heaven and whispered a secret to him and he had to keep the secret, but whatever it was, he knew it was all going to be okay in the end. I already said my prayer for him. I have a feeling he's doing just fine. How nice for a person to be remembered in this way once they are gone.

laddertipper


Thank you everyone for being so kind....Ladder I must have miss-spoke because I didn't mean to say I was angry that Charlie was peaceful...but looking back I was a mess writing it, so I'm amazed I wrote complete sentences. I had a rough time with him passing, and to boot that it happend in front of me. But, when I said I was angry, I just meant angry he had to suffer for so long, and had so many rough patches along the way. He was so wonderful, and took everything with a grain of salt, but I know that there were days it was really rough on his body, and he felt so much pain, he had to have his arm re-done so many times for his access...well anyway, I just meant I was angry he went the way he did, and that such an angel had so many rough times. but you are right, he was so special, and amazing, and definitely at peace with whatever God had planned for him. He had talked about life after death, and being ok with dying alot actually. More so even the last 3 weeks so it's funny you said that about how he heard from God, and had that secret, I think that was right on!! For the most part I handle things at work pretty well...I try not to get overly attached with what is happening, and just try to make there experience with us as comfortable as possible. But yesterday was tough..he was like a father to me, and he died in my arms....so I may have rambled alot of stuff last night, without thinking anything through and didn't mean to say anything bad...I'm just sad that he's gone, it's more of a selfish thing on my part then anything, b/c I'm going to miss him with every part of my being....

Anyway thank you guys again for your prayers, and for reading about him...It means more then I can really put into words.

Having so much anxiety today, but I'm attributing it to yesterday, and me not sleeping at all last night...I'm trying to just focus on the day, and that's about it right now. Using mg's technique and pretending I'm coming down with a flu or something...it's helping actually!

Hugs everyone!! Hope you all have a wonderful day!
Rene

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We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 11:42 am 
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OK Rainbow, I'm going to try and cheer you up with my funny dog story.

There is this small lake about 3 miles from our house and my 11 year old daughter and I go there pretty frequently and 'explore' and whatnot. Well, January of this year, we decided to bring the dumb dog to the lake with us, he's a Cocker Spaniel BTW. We get to the lake and I can see that it's frozen over, I thought COOL, we can go sliding around on it. Well, the ice was only about 1/4" to 1/2 inch thick so there was going to be no sliding around on the ice that day. Anyway, my daughter and the goofy dog went around one side of the lake while I threw rocks onto the ice to watch them break through (yeah, I'm just a big kid!). A minute or two goes by and I notice that crazy dog is running around on the ice, acting a fool. I knew instantly what was coming next....he broke through the ice about 10 feet from shore and he couldn't get himself out. I went running around the side of the lake where my daughter was screaming bloody murder for me to save the little goofball. I start hollering the dogs name to try and get him to release the death grip that he had on the ice, but he refused. He just kept turning his poor little head and looking at me with those big brown eyes of his. This lake is about 1 mile away from the nearest house, there was no one there to help us and I knew if I called emergency services that it would take them too long to get here and get Sir Twit out of the water......I knew what I had to do, but I wasn't thrilled with idea of it......I was about to go swimming in the middle of January!! This lake is formed by the valley created where several hills come together, it gets deep quick!! I reach into my pocket and pull out my cell phone, give it to my daughter. I grab my wallet and throw it on shore. I grab my cigarettes and lighter and toss them on shore (hey, I wasn't wasting a perfectly good pack of cig's!!). Ugh, I take my first step onto the ice and break through immediately.....that frickin' water is COLD in January, let me tell you!! Off I go, one step at a time, breaking ice, making my way to Mr. Dumbass. The water passes my knees, the water passes my thighs.....Uh Oh, y'all know what body parts come next.....yep, the dreaded privates get a massive dose of COLD water. By the time I reach goofball I am up to my stomach in the water. I reach out and grabbed his paw, drag him to me and I pick him up and I throw him towards shore, he landed in the water and swam the rest of the way out. Now I gotta get my freezing ass back to shore, I turn around only to see him running up and down the hill like he has just had the best day of his life!! I mean he's running around like life is just grand! I swear he was laughing at me too......that little asshole!!

Talk about smells getting stuck in you nose, the dog, my car and myself smelled like dead fish for days....hell, my car still smells like dead fish!!!

BTW, the dog has lost his lake privileges.....PERMANENTLY!!!

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 12:56 pm 
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Romeo wrote:
OK Rainbow, I'm going to try and cheer you up with my funny dog story.

There is this small lake about 3 miles from our house and my 11 year old daughter and I go there pretty frequently and 'explore' and whatnot. Well, January of this year, we decided to bring the dumb dog to the lake with us, he's a Cocker Spaniel BTW. We get to the lake and I can see that it's frozen over, I thought COOL, we can go sliding around on it. Well, the ice was only about 1/4" to 1/2 inch thick so there was going to be no sliding around on the ice that day. Anyway, my daughter and the goofy dog went around one side of the lake while I threw rocks onto the ice to watch them break through (yeah, I'm just a big kid!). A minute or two goes by and I notice that crazy dog is running around on the ice, acting a fool. I knew instantly what was coming next....he broke through the ice about 10 feet from shore and he couldn't get himself out. I went running around the side of the lake where my daughter was screaming bloody murder for me to save the little goofball. I start hollering the dogs name to try and get him to release the death grip that he had on the ice, but he refused. He just kept turning his poor little head and looking at me with those big brown eyes of his. This lake is about 1 mile away from the nearest house, there was no one there to help us and I knew if I called emergency services that it would take them too long to get here and get Sir Twit out of the water......I knew what I had to do, but I wasn't thrilled with idea of it......I was about to go swimming in the middle of January!! This lake is formed by the valley created where several hills come together, it gets deep quick!! I reach into my pocket and pull out my cell phone, give it to my daughter. I grab my wallet and throw it on shore. I grab my cigarettes and lighter and toss them on shore (hey, I wasn't wasting a perfectly good pack of cig's!!). Ugh, I take my first step onto the ice and break through immediately.....that frickin' water is COLD in January, let me tell you!! Off I go, one step at a time, breaking ice, making my way to Mr. Dumbass. The water passes my knees, the water passes my thighs.....Uh Oh, y'all know what body parts come next.....yep, the dreaded privates get a massive dose of COLD water. By the time I reach goofball I am up to my stomach in the water. I reach out and grabbed his paw, drag him to me and I pick him up and I throw him towards shore, he landed in the water and swam the rest of the way out. Now I gotta get my freezing ass back to shore, I turn around only to see him running up and down the hill like he has just had the best day of his life!! I mean he's running around like life is just grand! I swear he was laughing at me too......that little asshole!!

Talk about smells getting stuck in you nose, the dog, my car and myself smelled like dead fish for days....hell, my car still smells like dead fish!!!

BTW, the dog has lost his lake privileges.....PERMANENTLY!!!



OMG OMG!!! That story was freakin' hilarious!! Thank you so much for sharing that with me. It totally cheered me up! I nearly spit my coffee out when I was reading it, b/c I was cracking up! Just the way you talked about the dog, and the names you gave him!! That is sooo totally something that would happen to me too, so I totally get it, and your frustration as well! Thank heavans nothing happened to the lil bugger!! OMG Your daughter and wife must have had quite a show with Daddy jumping to the rescue!!! LMAO!! OMG Thanks again, I really needed that!!!! I have a 13 year old Golden retriever, who is just the best friend anyone can ask for. She's starting to fail pretty bad, and I'm not looking forward to the inevitable. I'm going to miss her sooo much! She used to run with me every day, but a year and a half ago, I had to stop bringing her as it was just too much for her. She is a really sensitive dog too, which is just sooo sweet! She's very good with my children. Because we know she is nearing the end of her time, back in December we started looking for a puppy to add to the family, in hopes that it will help me and the children deal with losing her maybe just a little bit better. So we ended up with CoCo a toy pekingese, she's only 7Lbs, but is a ball of fire! OMG She thinks she's a great dane!! Just gets into whatever she can. She learned how to get up and down the stairs that go to my bedroom, which are very steep. We live in a log cabin, and the stairs that lead to my room, which is also the loft, are just difficult in general to get up, and she has to jump to get to each step. But she was determined and did it at 3 months old!! The kids love her, so I'm glad we got her, but she is the first small breed I've ever had. I've always had big dogs, mostly retrievers. The golden is 110 pounds! Her head is bigger then the pek. LMAO We have a lot of fun with them though.

Anyway, there I go just a rambling again! How annoying that must get for you guys!! LOL You definitely cheered me up, so thank you very much for that!!

They just scheduled Charlie's funeral, and his daughter asked me to say something at his wake..So I'm trying to focus my engergy on that, and giving him a good farewell!! I think he would be happy with that.

Anxiety is horrible today. I am so nervouse and jittery, it's making me feel very off, and just jumpy...My skin is crawling which has to be one of the worst feelings for me!! Thankfully we are very busy at work though, so I have a lot to keep me occupied! UGH! Going to run for as long as I can tonight when I get home. Hoping to do 6 miles.

Hugs everyone!
R

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We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 12:59 pm 
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Romeo, that is sooooo funny! I mean, he could've been killed and there he is acting like it's the time of his life! Dogs....gotta love them and I surely do!


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 1:07 pm 
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ClearAqua wrote:
I grew up with Pekingese dogs....love those little fellas :) I had to smile at the Cherry Chapstick story...my dogs do the same thing! Hubby is addicted to that stuff too...I buy it in 3 packs for him :)

I agree...don't know what I'd do without you guys on here....how comforting it was to have somewhere to come when experiencing withdrawal. How comforting to have others going thru similar things....you get to bounce stuff off each other and not feel like a "weenie" LOL!

rain, I find it no coincedence that a few of us joined this forum at just about the same time. It's like we were supposed to find each other to give support! I can't believe I happened upon here with some incredibly nice and knowledgeable people.

I tried other internet forums and they were soooooo negative....I posted once or twice and didn't go back. I don't want to have a "whine" festival...or a "sub hate" forum. Sub is not bad! Sub allowed me to withdraw off the hydro comfortably. It allowed me time for my back to heal to a point where I no longer need chronic pain meds. It allowed me to get past the chronic depression that chronic pain causes. Yes, we have to "withdraw" off the Sub too....but at least, we get to control that! We could not control the other.
Some, like hatmaker, choose to stay on Sub. Isn't it great that she has that option? To find a medication that she can use to help with chronic pain and be on it the rest of her life...hey, I was right there with her a year ago. Thought I would never get relief from chronic pain any other way. I find it wonderful that she is so supportive of us who are trying to taper.

This really is about as good as you can get in a public forum for being unbiased, non-judgemental and knowledgeable support. I cringe at some of the things I read at other forums...all kinds of home-made, made-up ways to taper "fast", crazy ways of using opiates to taper off Subs...I have never seen anything posted here that was not sound and medicallly good advice.

Hope you have a great day today....storms where I'm at...thunder and all that good stuff!


You hit the nail on the head with all that you said!!! I also had looked around other forums before settling here, and man some of what I read at the others scared the pants off of me!!! OMG There are some ideas that people get and try, that I do not know how they can do that. It scares me to think what I would have tried had I not found it here.

I also agree that it's awesome that you have so many options with subs, and it's ok to stay on it for as long as you need. I for one, do not know what I would have done without it. I think about it a lot, and how it saved my life pretty much. I cringe at the thoughts of what could have happend otherwise. The strangest thing for me, is that my neck & back pain, is no where near as bad as it was back when I was popping all of those pills! I did have some surgery, but was told I would still have pain, and I had myself convinced I needed pain pills for the rest of my life, but the pain is significantly reduced, and I rarely even have to take motrin now, except if I've over extended myself.

I'm glad you got a chuckle over Coco attacking my nose!! LOL OMG It was the craziest thing ever, she just wanted to go to town on the cherry chapstick! hahaha!! I still have the smells, and they are a little worse today actually. The chapstick, though I think it's a little crazy that I do that, but it honestly helps so much and keeps me from getting sick to my stomach from the smells. I am so hoping they go away soon, it seems to be lasting much longer this go around.

Anyway, I'm thrilled I found all of you, and this site for allowing me to find you guys! I know for a fact I could not do what I'm doing with out all of your support, and this forum!!!

Hugs!!!!!!
Rene

_________________
We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell


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