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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 2:02 am 
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Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2015 6:44 pm
Posts: 294
Location: Southern Ohio
I sure hope this works out for you. All I can say is keep yourself busy and try not to think about. I wished some other people would pop in and give their plan of attack. There are very few on here that is or has done what you are doing. Most people that stop Subs don't come back and tell their experiences. You sound like you have a lot of will power. All I can say is good luck with this. You seem to be doing fine now.
Hang in there
Happy


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 6:40 am 
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It sounds like if you went to a Dr and go to the right dose you would do great. If you were at 100mg of Oxy you will need more than what you're currently taking to not have to dose all day. Good luck!


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 10:00 am 
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NQ, I would like to support you in this taper plan you have and will be here for you when the withdrawl hits but I would like to understand why? Why not see a doctor, get a script, and do a much slower, less painful, taper? It will be hell and you will go looking for your doc. If you had the suboxone, it would be legal and safe. My fear is that you will get to that deep hell of withdrawl and just go score as much of anything you can! I hope you understand what my fear is and know that I am just trying to give you the best feedback that I can. There are others here who have decided to "jump" and we support their decision too!


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 12:43 pm 
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Hey gang. Checking in.

I felt pretty good this morning and was temped to hold out until lunch but this medicine seems to work best without the empty---full empty full action.
But I DID only do 1 mg as opposed to the 2mg plan I had written down lastnight.
It seems to be just fine and I may even be feeling a bit better as a whole.

Happy...
I'd like to thank you for what you may think was just a small observation.
Saying, "you seem to have alot of willpower" was MUCH more powerful than you think.
You're right I DO have IMMENSE willpower... and actually took great pride in that "skill".
BUT over the past year as the oxy began to REALLY take control... It seemed to suck away - ALL - that strength and willpower I used to have.
I mean, if I had a fresh refill... I just COULDN'T stop myself from popping a 30 every two hours..!

Without getting all sappy, I really appreciate the reminder. Thank you Happy. It made a difference today.

I will check in later after work and address the concerns from y'all about tapering off the subs vs Dr script.
But I think ya know what I am going to say.

Thanks for caring and replying.
I look forward to seeing a post when I can pull away and check. (Kinda like a satisfies a craving).

-NQ


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 1:33 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2015 6:44 pm
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Location: Southern Ohio
Thanks for the kind words! We all are on here to help and give you support. I just want you to be prepared for what's to come. I hope it will be very easy for you. The mental part is going to be the hardest. You do have a great outlook on this and that means a lot!
Happy


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2015 8:50 pm 
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Posts: 517
Hi NQ
I wrote a long post on my lunch break & lost my internet connection! I tried to do a short sub taper. I got down to 150 mgs oxy then waited 24 hour. I think it was 5-7 days on sub and I only made it 3 days clean. The cravings and depression were to much for me. That was in 2012. I tried tapering the oxy & that really didn't work. In January 2013 I tried again to stop using. I made it a few days but ended up at my doctor with chest pain. Turns out I had a small heart attack. I wanted off so badly but I couldn't seem to do it & I started really thinking about ORT,,specifically sub. It took another 7 months for me to call a doctor and start the treatment.

I really understand that you don't want anyone to know. I am a nurse (not nursing now but work in a doc office) so if anyone found out I figured I would lose my job.

Really, I just want to ask you to consider making a doc appt if this doesn't workout. You pay cash for the visit and you can pay cash for scripts. Do it for a few months and only take the 3-4 mgs that you are taking now. Save the rest to taper off sub very slowly and you should be ok. In those few months find some real life support, AA, smart, there are other groups if you don't like aa. IMO, you need time to change so you don't relapse. If some how your wife finds out you are going to a doctor for help I bet she will be less pissed off then finding out you are buying off the street. Just my opinion.

I support you no matter what you choose. It's your life and You are worth whatever it takes.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 2:56 pm 
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Hi all!

Im not sure how this posting system works but I hope y'all who been helping with support and advise, find this update.

Well.... Today is Sunday and at 7:30 pm, I'm offically -1 week oxy free...!
(Ignoring any "technicalities")

This is amazing, with more honest soul searching I 've done, its actually more like 3 YEARS that I haven't skipped -a-single-dose-... Three years.!
Prior to finding a rock solid 'blueberry' connection, I had a solid vyke connection which I used for a legit lower back disk that rubbed on my spinal cord. I even had legal script for two years until my Dr said, Surgery or pain mgt. Well... I'd never pass a pain mgt piss test, so I never went back.
I got enough oxy for my pain, so losing 750 vykes was a small setback. I usually did 1½ vyke in the am then just do oxy at lunch and on ride home .
So immediately oxy was 3x/day affair. And for awhile strictly that way... 7days/week.
That schedule was fine during work days... but weekends are tough for me not to dose 'as wanted' vs 'as scheduled'.
So... Over last 6-8 months I became somwhat uncontrollable. (Except for work days, but they too became, " what's another ½ at 10am" ect...
By then(now), I no longer feel Hunger ( oh what painkillers can mask). I eat basically cuz I know I have to.
Well... This resulted in a loss of 15 solid pounds. For the past 25 years I was ALWAYS 185lbs. NOW, I weigh 170, wet and fully dressed. This will come up again further down...

Except for MILD w/d during oxy stop point and 2nd uncomfortable 'induction' day, things are going surprisingly well.
Dosage taper recap:
Day 1- approx 4 mg (2mg am 2mg pm) Tues
Day 2- slowly intake of 2mg in am(and resulting high anxiety). Wed
This was clearly not enough as I fumbled through the day in MILD/bearable wd symptoms and I was still nervous about the whole sub thing so I didn't take a night dose.
Day 3- 2mg in am 1 mg in pm (perfect dose, felt 'normal'). Thurs
Day 4- 1mg in am. 1mg in pm Fri
Day 5- 1mg in am. .5 mg in pm Sat
Day 6- 1 mg in am. Plan on .5 mg tonight. Sun (still holding at 'normal')

And here we are. Basically I have felt very good CONSIDERING...
I would rate it as feeling 90-95% whole.

I did feel a bit 'crave-y' yesterday, but I didn't have to work and those days have always been tough to control. Kind of like having a cigarette with EVERY coffee for 3 years and suddenly NOT smoking with that coffee now.

Final sub plan
Day 7- .5 mg in am .5mg in pm Mon
Day 8- .5 mg in am. .25mg in pm. Tues

From here I will play by ear.
Either I will now
skip a day... Or
go .25 mg in am .25 mg in pm
Skip a day then take last .25 mg

That will be the last of my sub.
I'm feeling pretty hopefull that the taper won't be too uncomfortable.
No matter WHAT... and aside from Minor discomfort this 'journey' has been NOTHING even CLOSE to what I REGULARLY endured while forcing myself to drastically taper oxys to make sure my supply lasted after having a 20 pill weekend...!!

Now I hear the concerns from y'all about battling SEVERE Cravings, But....
And I may be nieve, but I PLAN:
- on using food as a weapon. For Every craving, I will attempt to eat something. I'm athletic build and 15 lbs was ALOT to lose. It was noticeable to 'longtime, no see' meet ups...and definitely needs to be regained.
-weekends/days off (toughest times) I PLAN on playing more with, and practicing with my kids and their sports at EACH tough point (I may wear them out...)

Again, I know this may be naive...but I THINK I can have a handle on cravings. (I quit smoking ct and never slipped once).

That infamous text (Alset. Stop by.)doesn't worry me (atm) as I was kinda tight-fisted with my 'supply' and wouldn't even TRY to waste them boucing off the subs blocking my receptors... That will be a future but approaching battle.

I'm more worried about depression.

WE'RE nowhere near that bridge at the moment, but I'm open to all suggestions of help that don't involve MORE subs or a shrink. :--/

This I know is FAR from over so if y'all could check in from time to time with your continued helpful suggestions... I'd REALLY appreciate it.

Phewwww.... Long fckn week I'll tell ya.

-NQ


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 3:01 pm 
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Hi Tiki. Thank you for the post.

Are you still on subs or did you do the extended taper that you suggest?

-NQ


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 3:37 pm 
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Hey NQ,

I have never done exactly what you are doing, been on subs longer than any other opiate. But I was on them for a few years and recently quit them about 10 weeks ago. I can tell you its not easy but it is doable. I know how you feel having to work and other responsibilities while going through this. I am a single parent to 2 daughters and I work a lot. It was hard, I had to push myself. But I got through it, and so can you!

It must be hard not having the support of your family and not being able to let them know. I of course didn't have to worry this time about a significant other, and I just told my daughters I was quitting medicine but not what kind. The only people who knew what was up were my mother, my boss, and a few close friends. Everybody else thinks I had a bad "virus". Maybe you can play that card if you have to?

Anyway, I've been following your posts and just wanted to give you my opinion. Hang in there, keep posting. You will find wonderful support and great people here!


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 6:41 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 09, 2013 4:49 pm
Posts: 517
Hi NQ

I am still on sub. I have chronic & progressive pain, the sub helps my pain and I don't have to increase the dose.

Reading forums & articles is where I got the info. My eyes were wide open when I started suboxone but I continue to keep informed because I may want to stop some day. To me it's just medication, not unlike my BP mess.

When you read successful jumps, they all say exercise and healthy foods along with tons of water helps you heal faster.


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