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 Post subject: Elaboration...
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 5:39 pm 
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I was reading through a lot of posts here and haven't come across many H users. I know it's all the same in the end, but was wondering if anyone else has heard of Suboxone being the go-to now instead of Methadone? I tried Methadone, and it was great but the clinic life of every day and side effects of it were terrible. I actually didn't realize how much I hated Methadone until I got on Suboxone.
My story is down the line here, and though it's pretty short, well there are so many details- I just feel overwhelmed when I think about it.
I am strong on Subs for 4 months now, and feel amazing. I can't believe I have been clean for 4 months. It is very strange.
So if anyone else doesn't mind sharing ? Anyone coming from needles/heavy using or H to Subs? Do you feel like it satisfies all the cravings??

Thanks.


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 6:27 pm 
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Greetings poppie, I am one of a few members who transitioned from H to sub. I never did the methadone thing. The cravings are the hardest part for me but I am now off suboxone after being on it for almost 1 year following a heavy 3 month binge. Seems like most ppl here have been pill addicts but like you say it is the same in the end. Sub did help with cravings at the higher doses 4+ mg. Once I decided to get off they came back pretty hard at times. You just have to look at your past and accept that heroin is bad for you. it destroys your life. I still crave bet the cravings are managable. I have even been face to face w/ junk and did not do it. That was tough but I did it. I LOVE the shit, but know I CAN NOT waste another day of my life being that person. I wish you luck in your journey. You can have sobriety if you truly want it. LIFE IS BETTER clean....


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 Post subject: Thanks.
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 7:09 pm 
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sweet16 wrote:
Greetings poppie, I am one of a few members who transitioned from H to sub. I never did the methadone thing. The cravings are the hardest part for me but I am now off suboxone after being on it for almost 1 year following a heavy 3 month binge. Seems like most ppl here have been pill addicts but like you say it is the same in the end. Sub did help with cravings at the higher doses 4+ mg. Once I decided to get off they came back pretty hard at times. You just have to look at your past and accept that heroin is bad for you. it destroys your life. I still crave bet the cravings are managable. I have even been face to face w/ junk and did not do it. That was tough but I did it. I LOVE the shit, but know I CAN NOT waste another day of my life being that person. I wish you luck in your journey. You can have sobriety if you truly want it. LIFE IS BETTER clean....


Interesting. I hear you. I could not be face to face with dope now-ON SUBS! I would probably save it and skip a dose of subs, what a bunch of BS!
I actually had people texting me about it...i changed my number. it was very hard.
Thank you for the input!


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 23, 2012 12:09 pm 
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It's weird when I ran out of pills I would get H to stop the wd's then go back to the pills. I'm just happy I am on the Sub now and feel so much better! I'm happy that things got nipped in the bud when they did because my intake was out of control and the suboxone for me is helping with my pain, cravings, and I can finally get "some" sleep.
Best of Luck!
Mahalo

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"When you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you."


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 12:36 am 
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Im about the same as danigirl, My favorite was the pills, but I did H, when nothing else was around. I always told myself I was doing it just to 'get by' so It wasnt "that bad"
yeah right.

Anyways, I did try methadone too, actually found a "backwards" doctor, out in the boonies I guess you'd say, that'd perscribe you methadone for addiction, but wrote pain on the Rx. so you got it a month ata whack.
90 days actually, he'd write you three perscriptions, all dated 28 days apart.
Long story short,
I sooner than later figured out you could take 'extra' methadone and catch a hellofa "nod"
well, you know how that ended.

Thats why I do so well on the sub I guess. You can take extra all you want, but Ive NEVER caught a nod.
Hope that helps. welcome to the forum!!!
Oh yea, I was an IV user at the end, thank god I got 'straight' with the subs pretty quickly though.

PEACE

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That's TRUE STRENGTH
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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 10:12 am 
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hey guys thanks for responding!
I actually posted my full story in the "my addiction story" section

anyway, ive done it all and just recently cut back my dose in half-16 to 8.
feeling great!
ive had tough cravings and for no reason at all. like life will be awesome sauce then all of the sudden BAM! im like drooling over the nastiness of H.
anywho feel free to read my full story in the addiction story section-cheerio!


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 Post subject: heres the story....
PostPosted: Tue Apr 24, 2012 10:18 am 
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I never had a chance. My parents did not give me a single chance to thrive. I am blown away I am alive today.
It starts with 12 years old, living in a chaotic household. Ma was smoking pot, not paying any attention. Re-living the ol' days.

I had depression and bipolar symptoms, as early as 12 years old. Did not find out any of this until my newly found recovery THIS YEAR.

So, how does one go from point A to point B?? Well, I started with the glorious pot smoking, since my brothers and ma were doing it, why not? I started running away from home at 12 years old. I saw my first Heroin Addict this young. At that time, I felt that I was too inexperienced to try dope via needles. I remember thinking it was fascinating & wanted to try that. It was like the "ROCK STAR" status. Well now.

I waited and instead tried LSD and Ecstasy. I was about 13 years old when I discovered E Pills and "Molly". Well, anyone experienced in THAT knows how much "smack" they put into E Pills. The browner they were, the more I loved em. I used E on and off, and pretty heavily, until I was 18 years old. I dabbled into cocaine from 14 years old-16 years old, and clearly remember coming off of it using Meth for the first time. Well, THAT was a whole new world of crazy for me. I turned into a Meth-head from 16 Years old-20 years old. Of course, it started out as a "weekend thing". Well, anyone who has ever tried that knows after being awake for a few days, it ain' the weekend anymore!

In the midst of all this in my teens, I had an offer of some mysterious creamish-whitish powder that was supposed to make me feel dream-like. Well at this point I was raving hard and didn't care. It turned out to be a giant line of Heroin, China no doubt, and I went into LALA Land. I hadn't tried it for a few years to come since nobody I knew did anything but Meth and E.

Well at 20, I met my husband. A normal, loving guy who was not into Meth. Somehow, I just got bored with it, and gradually it DID turn back into a weekend thing, then not at all. It's simply like that. The quality of speed went straight downhill and I started reacting to it much differently. Well anyway, my opiate experiences had been limited to vicodins and percs with the weekends and turned into an occasional methadone pill, fentanyl patches and morphine lollypops, on and off from 19 years old- 22 years old. I remember the first time I put a patch in my cheek, I threw up and passed out. It was terrible and I was not prepared for the dosage I had taken..very scary.
Ha. Well.

I had never tried needles with ANY of these drugs, and for some reason I believe that is why I could quit anything without a fight. The first time I used a needle, that was it. I was done.

I was 24 years old. I am now 27 years old. The 3 years of hell I endured have been an endless search for dope. I have lived the life of a straight up junkie, going hundreds of miles into a big city just to score 10$ bags of China-selling my jewelry-all of it. I went thru an exasperating amount of money and lost pretty much everything and everyone thru the last 3 years. All the years prior were hard, and I pulled through with jobs, money and charisma. This time, not so much.


Anyway, long story shortened some here, I found an amazing doctor who put me on subs. I tried the clinic thing for a couple months with subs, well that didn't work out. I quickly found loopholes and manipulated the "counselors" there, and was shooting dope and dilaudid before I even tapered off subs completely. After relapsing hard, I overdosed and nearly died. When I woke up , Nobody was there. Just me, passed out in my car in a strange city, covered in my own vomit.

This time , I found an actual doctor who works with me one on one, doing deep therapy and tracing my patterns back to childhood. The depth of which I go every week into my soul to find the broken pieces and pick them back up again is mind blowing. Its in its own league.

So that is my story in a nutshell. I had no chance, no parent to guide me, and though I love them with all my heart and understand NOW that they didn't have a chance either, I also take what they didn't do and what they did do, and try to apply it to myself to break those old patterns of self destruction.

Thanks for reading, if you did. lol.


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