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PostPosted: Tue Jun 28, 2011 1:57 pm 
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tearj3rker wrote:
All opiates do.

That's why we love them so much?


Really? I thought Opiates gave me a greater capacity to feel. To love life. To love people around me. Perhaps I am the exception and not the rule. I think there is a lot of unnecessary guilt associated with an opiate high. But I don't think there is anything more noble about getting that high from playing with your kids or snorting a line of heroin. A person would do either of those things because the chemicals that are released in the brain make them feel good, that's all. I could be looking at this whacky too though I dunno.

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LifeIzGut wrote:
Suboxone helped to bring all of my emotions back! I laugh :P I love to joke around :wink:
and am no longer numb :shock: like I was on opioids!


I feel like this emotions thing is very easy to misunderstand. Compared to active use, I think that hands down, there's not doubt that when a person goes onto Suboxone, they will feel a million times more in touch with emotions and life in general. How could they not? Really, there's no comparison. So, when I talk about Suboxone affecting the depth and breadth of my emotions, I'm talking about the difference between being on Sub versus being on nothing, not being on Sub versus active addiction. Does that make sense? I don't doubt that someone with a very long history of opiate abuse would also probably have trouble remembering what they even felt like before being on opiates. A few people on here have reported that experience....

Just wanted to make that clarification.

laddertipper


That is a really good point! I think with all drugs/medications it has different effects on everyone. Some will feel emotionless and some may feel for the first time in touch with their emotions! It's different for everyone and it's good to know that we shouldn't have to feel this way or that. If you get something positive out of that, that's all that matters!

LifeIzGut wrote:
Suboxone helped to bring all of my emotions back! I laugh :P I love to joke around :wink:
and am no longer numb :shock: like I was on opioids!


That is great!!

Now do you think you are in a different state of mind now, living a different lifestyle, and that plays into it? Do you attribute it all to the change of drug, or pretty much equal weight?


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 28, 2011 4:20 pm 
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tearj3rker wrote:
All opiates do.

That's why we love them so much?


First JohnBoy sorry to hear about your struggles, I can’t say if it is the right thing to do but I do wish I could be free of all opiates but my pain makes that impossiable. Unless medical procedures take a huge step forward! And as of people thinking you are a stranger my mom use to say the same thing to me at times while on SUB. We would get in very serious arguments and I would not show any emotions at all and I remember her saying many times “I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANY MORE” my GF actually said that as well just in different situations.

Tearjerker I don’t know but I got the complete opposite effect from active addiction with opiates!


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 Post subject: None for me
PostPosted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 1:06 pm 
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I have been on Suboxone for over 2 years after a long, long, 100MG methadone addiction...Taking Suboxone vrs methadone has give me BACK my emotions. I was a zombie and robot on methadone...felt nothing, and had severe depression....Suboxone has actually allowed me to *feel* again....but i guess everybody is different.


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 Post subject: YOYO"
PostPosted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 6:57 pm 
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thanks for the reply B-boy. when and if i get of suboxone ?" milaka your right every body"s not the same.
i guess i got to stop feeling like a yoyo and just go with the flow. 8)


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:24 am 
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To be clear, it's not like I popped a Suboxone pill in my mouth and all of a sudden my emotions went on vacation. The lack of emotions happened slowly, over time.

Actually, the first Suboxone pill I took brought back a lot of my emotions, just like the first Hydrocodone pill I took or the first OxyContin I took, but after a while, on ANY of those drugs, my emotions started to tank. Maybe it's part of the addiction/dependence that grows from opiate use/abuse??

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 Post subject: emotions/on&off suboxone
PostPosted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:33 am 
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ya" my emotions were flying every where starting suboxone. but now after 15 months,and other meds,that have made me depressed, every thing turned around for the worst. but it's not sub's that made all the problems". physic meds will make you a fucking zombie", never mind about how suboxone effects your emotions??! if you want to be emotionless go on the right physic med and you will be! "but all in all". year's and year's of drug and alcahol use, can put a big DAMPER" on any bodies emotions.
being on subs for pain would not effect someones emotions as much becouse the medication is working for the pain.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 5:18 pm 
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OH Romeo thank you for saying that/pointing that out. When I talk about Suboxone making you emotionless I am talking more so about long term Suboxone use! At first suboxone help me very much with emotions but over time the longer I was on Sub the worst things got for me. This is was a very slow gradual process id say about a year at the least was when I started to really notice things. You are not just all the sudden going to lose all emotions after your first dose. I am very happy you pointed that out because I don’t want to send the wrong message to anyone. But at the same time I want people to be prepared for this if it does come up because it seems like a lot more of us are having these problems than not.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 12:49 am 
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[font=Tahoma]Hi everyone....I am kinda new here....have read for a long time....my first post though....
I just felt this jumped out at me to respond.....

I have been on subs for 2 1/2 years.....and looking back, what happened to me, was I had a complete
breakdown about 5 months into starting sub treatment. What happened was that all the reasons I "self medicated" came flying at me.....in other words, the sub only treats the physical withdrawl part of it....it came time (not my time either ) to face the demons that made me use. I was up to 45+ percs a day......After a complete total breakdown, not able to work for 4 months, and put into intensive IOP and then very intense work with psychiatrist/therapist (one person)......I saw my pdoc 7 days a week at one point......and what was discovered, was that I have had bipolar , depression and panic for years....and I always self medicated, be it alcohol or any drug I got my hands on.

so, this being said, I do not believe it to be the suboxone that makes you feel this way, but rather, the reasons you used are drawing themselves out.....like i said, suboxone only treats the physical addiction part of it......there were reasons we all used as we did,,,,,,whether or not it is pain or emothional problems......they are bound to come to a head when opiates are dropped......

I have had my fair share of turmoil these past two years. I have been through over 20 different psych meds , to no avail....and currently I am taking 6 different meds to treat this horrible me, that has come to surface. It aint pleasant!....the reason I stopped the opiates......my tolerance became so high, I was waking in middle of night in serious withdrawl.....I owed alot of money.....I was unknown anymore to my family....Recovery was my last ditch effort....and yes, I am happy it happened, but it really sucks what I am going through to get to a state of being able to function at a normal level-if that exists.

I wish you all well, and please, just remember....the sub is only to treat the physical withdrawl...there is other work to do![font=Tahoma] [/font][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/font]

all my best....
Linda


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 12:59 am 
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Hi Linda and welcome! Glad you decided to join and post. I fully agree with you. I was in therapy before, during, and after my active addiction. But after, once I was on suboxone, my head was finally clear enough to start working on things head on. I remember so much shit (emotionally) crashing towards me with nothing to self-medicate with. I really believe most people would benefit from therapy to improve their lives.

I hope to see you posting more.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:12 am 
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Hi Linda,

Welcome to the forum and I'm glad you decided to share your story.

I find myself wanting to say I'm sorry for the breakdown you had at 5 months into your Suboxone treatment, but I also understand how important that breakdown was to your overall recovery, so, I'm sorry it happened, but I'm happy for you at the same time.

I'm glad that you're putting forth such an incredible amount of time and effort to really figure out who you are and what makes you tick, in my opinion, that's what recovery is all about......and YES, it's hard as hell to face who we were/are!!

I wish you great success on your road to recovery!!

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:32 am 
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Wow that was really fast replying.....thank you both for your encouragement.....
and the fact that you are for the most part agreeable with me....I doubt myself so often.
This is not easy....this is harder than quitting my DOC.....because I had the suboxone to cover that....
now it is mano el mano......

Yes, it has been really hard, and sometimes, feel like throwing in the towel.......but I really don't want to go back that way.....I need to figure out what the heck drove me into addiction....I pretty much know by now....but now I need to have alot of patience to fugure out how to treat it.

I really hope others will recognize this about the subs.....just there to cover withdrawl. There is much work to be done after you start the sub....we all think it "magic" in the beginning....but truly, it is not....it is just a "tide me over", until we get to the crux of it.

Once again, it feels so good to be validated....as I lack any ounce of self confidence or esteem..
Thanks so much and all my best to you all!


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:40 am 
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You're not the only one with piss poor self confidence or self esteem, I've been fighting those suckers for a while too, proud to say I'm making some headway though!!

BTW, I quit taking Suboxone 13 months ago yesterday and it wasn't until I quit Suboxone that I got to experience the real me.......Yep, that was a big OUCH!!! But hey, we've got to work through our shit sooner or later, right??

Again, I'm real proud of you Linda for tackling your issues head on. You're stronger than you believe yourself to be!!

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2011 1:29 am 
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i felt the same way, then i started to go to aa/na and somewhere i leveld out. i started feeling all emotions again. thats why we used drugs so we didnt feel anything. I used when i was happy/sad/excited/ any time every day. it may take away yo get your emotions back. Also high doses increase those side effect. i started at 16mg, in February. Now i'm down to 7mg. I like 7mg way better way less side effects i get alot of horrible headaches though, kind shitty IB profen does the job


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 10, 2011 12:36 am 
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AA /NA. is not going to restore any ones emotions back". drugs or alcahol won't ether. naturely if some one stays clean for a year or 2... or even more, emotions will restore... that would be with out any brain damage.' i'm just getting tired of aa na giving out shit that is not necessarily true. people can get lost in they'r self". not knowing weather they have a medical problem, or just need a place to share they'r habit's. just my undivided opinion thanks


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 10:28 am 
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I definitely feel that suboxone dampens my emotions and has an effect on my personality. Whenever i go a period of time without subs or even just lowering my tolerance, i notice my emotions flare up. I laugh a lot more, enjoy music more, and find tears in my eyes from watching idiotic movies. It's a bit more extreme than i normally am, but still. It's really impeded on my musical sensibilities, as it takes away the emotional reward from playing and my creativity as well.

The thing that's bothered me the most however is the irritability. It was worse when i was on a higher dosage, but it's still noticeable now. I've had a hell of a time trying to control it, but i still end up snapping at people. It's terrible because that's not my typical personality whatsoever, but buprenorphine gives me dysphoria similar to heroin (albeit to a lesser extent), where i get pissed off about the silliest little things and can't be content. I also have mild misophonia (certain sounds make me irrationally angry), and the suboxone has amplified that as well. A lot of times if my family members are eating, i'll have to leave the room rather than being driven insane by the sound of them eating. I had it previous to starting subs, but this has made it more extreme.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 4:39 pm 
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bortmackie wrote:
A lot of times if my family members are eating, i'll have to leave the room rather than being driven insane by the sound of them eating.


Is it the actual sound of them chewing that drives you nuts, or what?


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 9:00 pm 
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Yea, it's the sound itself. It's really poorly understood, but it has to do with some sort of brain abnormality that's otherwise benign. People with the disorder get really irrationally angry at certain sounds. It varies for each person, but chewing is the big one for me.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2012 9:10 pm 
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I can understand that because I know someone who cannot stand the sound of smacking when people chew their food. I always make sure I eat with my mouth closed when I am around this person!! What other sounds irritate you, if you don't mind me asking?


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2012 12:57 am 
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oh ya it's a pain in the ass to watch some one smack there jaws and teeth" .
what i said about AA/NA and getting your emotions back with or without and the rest i guess then i really did not no what the f i was talking about :oops:

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2012 10:16 am 
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bortmackie - no disrespect intended, but didn't I read in another of your posts that you snort your suboxone? That's really part of active addiction still which makes me wonder if you can properly even gauge your emotions if you're still doing that. Again, I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just trying to make a rational point.

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