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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 5:00 pm 
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Hope everyone is doing okay. So basically I was on h and other ops for 2 years and then I switched to subs for a year and a couple months. I was on 4mg for a year then tapered to 1mg the past month. But anyways im not doing to well. Days 3 through 5 were the worse the physical symptoms are subsiding but for some reason today I'm really craving some sub. It feels like an eternity when you are feeling like crap for 9 days. I'm pretty much bored with everything and best way to describe is I don't have an ounce of happiness right now. My question is how much longer can I expect to feel this way and if I took a small piece of sub would it destroy all the progress I have worked for this past 9 days which feels like at least a montH. I am not the type of guy to ask for help but I really need some help. What do you think?


Last edited by subsux55 on Tue Jun 09, 2015 5:39 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 5:17 pm 
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Anyone please I'm at the edge right now.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 5:49 pm 
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SS55

Did you jump from 1 mg? That's still considered a "high" dose from what i read. Here is my opinion/thought (whatever you want to call it), if you did stop at 1 mg then days 9-13 or so is when you feel the worse....if at any time you feel you will pick up your drug of choice please take a small piece of sub instead. If you do take even a tiny piece of sub then Yes you will be taking a step back. Any opiate is a step back. That doesn't mean you lost the war, just one battle. Maybe if you sleep and feel ok you will get your motivation back.


There are medications to help you get through. Do you have a family doctor? Clondidine is an old blood pressure medication that has been used for many years to help with detox. It can be dangerous if you take to much so you have to monitor your blood pressure and only take small amounts when necessary. It helps with the racing heart, anxiety & goose bumps. If you go to the doctor also ask him for "requip" for restless legs. You need a doctor to give you a script for that.

Regular immodium is also helpful. You have to double the dose but it also helps with crawly skin feeling, the runs & calms you down a bit. Drink A LOT of water. Dehydration can cause headache's, racing heart feeling, sweating and a few other yucky things. Protein helps, chicken, lentils egg's are a good source of protein.

Taking a long HOT shower or bath helps you feel better overall. At day 9 (IMO) you can push through. It's not easy but time does pass and you will start to feel human again. The choice is yours and whatever you choose we (the forum) will support you with no judgement.

Good Luck!!!! Keep us updated


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 6:00 pm 
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Just to clarify what i meant in the previous post....It's like a diet...You have been really good for 9 days and lost a few pounds. If you are feeling really crappy on day 10 and you eat a piece of your favorite cake (a piece, NOT the entire cake), it doesn't mean you should throw the towel in. It just means you went off your diet for ONE day. That's how i think about taking a tiny piece of sub.

It takes time for your body/brain to get used to working again. For over 3 years your brain hasn't really had to work. It's been artificially stimulated and now the stimulant is gone. The brain will work again but there will be starts & stops along the way.

It sounds like you are healing because of the depression (no happiness in you). That will pass. You should post signs around saying "this will pass" or "this is temporary" LOL

Do what you can and please post or PM me to let me know how you are doing. For some reason your post hit my heart...


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 6:33 pm 
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Tiki thank you for responding. You have made me feel a little better. The cake comparison is great way to look at it. I probably would have taken a piece of sub but you have given me some encouragement. I hope I can gut this out. I know I caN beat this. I didn't realize my brain is still recovering from my heavy h use. I did quit on 1mg. it's been a while since I did any h. I moved to. ATL a year ago and meant to quit the h there but I found a job quick and therefore I had to get thru the days somehow without being sick. Anyways I moved back to va and my good friend I have known for years I would buy a bundle and he would scoop it up andI would give him a few caps as a cop fee. We'll since my move back I saw him like the 5th day back and scored a lil. That same damn night my buddy passed away. It's also been 4 days since I've had a cigarette. Sorry if I'm rambling I guess it's alot of stuff hitting me but thank you tiki god bless you


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 6:37 pm 
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The mornings can be Pretty crappy. this whole past week I have had to smoke a bowl of mary in the morning to stop the morning anxiety. I mean I can't even sit down on the couch for 45 seconds I am pacing around the house. I'll take a shower and l
try to relax for a second and start my day but no its really crappy only thing that helps is the showers in the morning g till I smoke the mary. I guess it's because I always dosed right first thing in the am. Damn I would kill just to wake up and be able to concentrate on anything in the morning


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 7:28 pm 
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Are you exercising, drinking fluids, eating? Sometimes you are your own worst enemy by not taking care of yourself. What is your plan too? To get off suboxoNE or to get sober?


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 7:59 pm 
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I'm trying to take care of myself. I've worked out 7 of the last 8 days. This si nothing new for me I have always been good at sticking to my workout regime even tho it felt like death doing anything lately


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 8:05 pm 
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I have been drinking water and Gatorade . Also bought some vitamins..and my goal is to be sober I have no intentions on doing anymore full agonist. If I take anything it be a sub which I really don't want to. As I states earlier my friend has died so I have no connects. Just a couple more subs left but I just hope I will feel ok my friends are trying to hang out and stuff but I'm just not feeling Like hanging out. I don't really think any of my friends understand. They have never went through this


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 8:43 pm 
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I jumped from 8mg a month ago and day 5-6 were the worst. After day 7 it started getting better, is it getting better or still getting worse? The problem with sub is its hard to know because everyone is different but I assure you it gets better and you are really close.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 9:45 pm 
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Jj thank you for the support I appreciate it. I would say after day 6 I have seen the light at the end But these last few days I haven't really improved. It's frustrating I see people and smiling and having a great time and im.thinking I would do anything just to be able to enjoy myself.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 11:29 pm 
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Short and quick comedies really helped me, listening to music, walks, you've done something most people can't do, be proud of yourself. I would flush the remaining subs, it will feel so good!!! It's okay to smoke gonja for another week but if you want to stay clean I would stop. You are 5 days away, and you are through the worst it.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 11:39 pm 
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Thanks for the support it means so much. I am going to try to get some sleep.but I do doubt I will get more than 3 hours. Looks like I made it thru 9 days tomorrow is big 10. Will update tomorrow


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 8:46 am 
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subsux....I don't have anything to add to what tikki and jjinda said but I did want to lend you my support. Sometimes it feels like we're never going to get off Subs and the effects can last and last...but I have read many, many success stories and what you are going through is pretty average for anyone trying to stop. Others have made it and you can too! You will turn a corner one day and it's like having a baby...you will remember the pain but it won't seem as bad as it was AND you will have gotten through it!

When I finally get to the "jump", I've told myself to prepare for up to 3 months of after-effects. A sub taper and jump take time and the hardest thing is the patience and perserverance to get through it. Depression and lack of sleep is a real kicker and I'm sorry you are having to muddle through it.

Just dig in your heels one day at a time....and post here as much as you want. We understand and are here to cheer you on :) Hope you get a good night's sleep soon!

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 9:08 am 
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Thanks so much aqua today is the start of day 10. It's the morning that Kills me and seriously that's the thing that's hurting the most. I feel like debilitated for at least the first.couple.hours I am up. Like I said I dosed in the morning but damn . I've never had a problem in the morning until stopping sub. Even before sub I was always ready to go right when I got up. WeLl anyways just trying to make it through this.morning. if someone has had similar morning experiences can you share how you got through them and what you did to helpake it through. Idk how many mornings I can take like this guys


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 9:19 am 
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I've been having diarrhea this morning. First morning g I have had it.An this is so shirt I literally can't concentrate on anything and this is the most Anxious I've probably ever been in my life. IM trying to get thru the morning g without some cannabis but I'm really not doing good at all.right now it's like there is a ball inside my.stomach just want this to.stop


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 9:21 am 
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Damn I am so close to just taking a little piece why am I not getting better :( these past 10 days have been the longest 10 of my.life and I have bee. Thru some stuff. I'm breaking down


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 11:52 am 
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Don't take sub, get some immodium!!

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 11:58 am 
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SS, you just lost your friend to OD, right? Most people would be feeling awful for that reason alone. Why don't you write of video some kind of tribute to your friend. Or write him a letter and tell him why you're determined to get off all opiates. Tell him whatever is in your heart. Rail against him for dying if you have to. Yell at him for leaving you. Let his death be your affirmation for continuing on!

Clonidine might make you feel better than MJ. Do you have access to a family doctor who would prescribe that for you?

You are going to turn a corner any day now. Don't give up!

Amy

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 1:14 pm 
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SS I wanted to just lend u my support also. As tiki said earlier, ur posts tug at my heart also. I've not tapered off sub yet and who knows if I will ever completely. But I do know that horrible morning feeling from bk in the days of using my drug of choice. And it was debilitating to say the least. I couldn't think or concentrate. All I'd do was pace bk and forth throughout the house, just bad all the way around. Even though sub is to help us get off drugs, it's still a partial opiate and isn't the greatest feeling to come off of for most. But the difference is now it's ur choice, u have chosen to live ur life without sub, ur ready for that step. Even though the withdrawal sucks, ur heading to the life you've been waiting on. And day 10....that's awesome! Ur doing great and I know it doesn't feel like it right now but ur doing it :) and that is pretty inspiring to us all. I know it's obviously hard as hell, but like the others have said, ur close to turning the corner. I hope u turn it soon so that u can feel better, I'm cheering you on all the way!!

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