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 Post subject: On Day 5
PostPosted: Sun Jul 04, 2010 1:15 pm 
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[font=Verdana]I'm on day 5 of 16mg of Suboxone, one 8mg twice a day, and even though my body doesn't physically want a hydrocodone(that was my poison), mentally I'm still craving them,and I haven't really felt this way until today. Is this normal? Did anyone else experience this too? I'm keeping a journal, which seems to help, I log onto this webiste any chance I get, and am going to start NA meetings next week. I just got out of church, and I'm contiuning to pray for strength. I though Suboxone was supposed to make you not want to even consider taking an opiate? On the first day, if you would've handed me a hydrocodone, I would've said heck no. But today....well, that's a different story. What am I doing wrong? Words of wisdom, or advice would really help. I don't want to cave in! Thanks so much. You guys and gals are great support.[/font]


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 04, 2010 2:18 pm 
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well I'm new here but not to sub....

Just my opinion but sub never took away my "wanting" narcs. It kept me from going through withdrawal. It in fact saved me but what did happen is that as time progressed and I realized that there was life without pills...without counting pills to see how long I could make them last, without hunting down someone who had them, without bouncing from doc to doc and spending money that I didn't have, without having to skip paying the rent because I needed money for pills, without having to lie about EVERYTHING....that eventually I came to know "normal" not perfect but normal.....normal worries, normal problems. I came to know that the mental anguish I had endured for so long was not worth it and the "wanting" the pills subsided. I didn't need them anymore from the time I slipped that first sub under my tongue...but many times I wanted them. I gave in eventually and now I am back at square one but failure reminds me that I did it once and it will work out again. Please give it time.....give it time to realize how "normal" life can be without pills......well without pills except sub anyway. It's worth it!

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 04, 2010 2:36 pm 
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Hi jin,

I'm sorry you're feeling crappy right now. It is still early in your treatment and it's possible that your opiate receptors just aren't saturated yet. That should keep the "physical" cravings at bay. Personally, I believe we can still have "psychological" cravings...the kind where we want to use, but not necessarily need to use. Does that make sense? I know it's hard and you probably don't want to hear someone telling you to give it more time. But you've got to learn new coping skills, too. So that when things don't go your way, you'll have another way to deal with it other than popping a pill.

I've been on sub for over 18 months now and I remember in the beginning I felt the same way you did. Unfortunately, I can't say how long I felt that way for sure, but it wasn't very long. It was very early in my treatment that those physical cravings ceased. So do try to take deep breaths and give it just a little more time.

Please hang in there and do keep us posted. Use this forum as your support, because we are here for you.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 04, 2010 11:51 pm 
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:) Hello Jin,

Congradulations on 5 days!!!!! Thats huge the first week is the hardest! I have been on subs for 3 months now and still have those "urges", but it is getting easier day by day. I find that as soon as I get out of work is the hardest time or when I have free time I think "ohh I would fell so much better if I sniffed a few pills, then I could relax". I try to find something to get my mind off of it, the busyer I stay the less I crave it.

Also as everyone says change people, places, and things that related to your addiction. Which sometimes is very difficult, exspecially for me cause I live with my parents who are both addicts.

I try to just think very positive and remind myself how much I don't want to live that crazy life style anymore. Keep up the good work good thing will come! HAPPY 4TH OF JULY EVERYONE!!


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 7:14 am 
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For me, once I took about 16mg of suboxone, I had absolutely no desire to use at all. Not after one day, five days, fifty days and not even after a year and a half.

Obviously everyone is different and as they say: Your mileage may vary.

My guess is the cravings are mostly mental, not physical, since suboxone binds to your receptors with incredibly strong affinity, and I suspect they will pass if you just hang on a while.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 12:06 am 
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It gets easier, took me about 8-10 days and the cravings went away. What helped me the most was setting my alarm and taking a sub an hour or two before i am supposed to wake up for the day.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 2:47 am 
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Suboxone is going to stop the physical cravings. NOTHING is EVER going to stop the mental cravings. You just gotta keep doing what you're doing man and keep the mind and body busy. I started taking subs without a hitch about a year ago was fine up until about a month ago when at night I started getting really bad cravings again. Eventually they went away and everything is fine now. It just goes to show that no matter how far along in the recovery process you are, that little voice is never going to just go away. Maybe subside or go into hibernation but not just disappear. You're only on day five, things are going to get better. I PROMISE. If you have the time, get in the car and take a little trip, anything to keep your mind at ease. Posting on here was a good start though! A lot of us have found a lot of comfort and great things from just talking to people who have been in that same boat you have.

Keep us posted and good luck!

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 4:36 pm 
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I am at the beginning of my third month on Suboxone. At first I dwelled constantly on the fact that I couldn't take what made me feel so good. After a period of reflection and recovery I became aware that there are things that make me feel so much better than pills. To begin for regain respect in oneself and the respect of others, plus having the ability to genuiely feel suddenly made me realize that opiates WERE NOT everything I had going for myself. I've started healthy habits like working out and praying to my higher power and by praying I mean getting real about myself to something other than myself. I had to ask myself if I logged into this site to try to find some back door approval from someone to pick up where I left off with dope or was I trying to find positive reassurance and possibly look to add something to someone's post that might truly help them. I have an addictive personality. I used drugs to make me feel good along with legitimate reasons; I lied to doctors, in essence I committed multiple felonies by lying about my prescrptions from multiple sources. At first I felt shame. I now feel inspired to forgive myself and seek the good person I buried for a while. Please take it slowly. You are on day 5 of a very good decision. Be proud of yourself for that; feel good about that and let time take care of itself. Know that soon that there will be an increasing number of days where you will feel good and drugs will have nothing to do about it.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 01, 2010 6:25 am 
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...I can't remember what I did with the link, can't seem to find it though in my favorites, however, keywords yield nothing for some reason. Maybe they removed it or something. In short, there's a lot of statistical mumbo-jumbo about how buprenorphine reduces "mu-receptor availability" depending on daily dosage. it goes something like this - mu-avail. drops by 40% on 4 mgs, 80% on 8 mgs and 90-odd% on 16. now, if i understand correctly (and PLEASE correct me if I'm wrong), mu-receptor availability is that thing where there's free unoccupied mu-receptors in your brain or whatever? So, like, the more of them are available, the more intense cravings are, something like that. But I might as well be talking out of my arse here, I know a bit about statistics but nothing about biochemistry.

Anyway, here's the thing. Cravings will be there at first, it would be weird if they weren't. But the sooner you stabilize on your most comfortable dose, the faster they'll go away. Maybe some nostalgic, almost bitter-sweet longing for that warm glow-y numbness will return occasionally, but it's nothing even close to the nail-biting, crawling-out-of-my-skin kinda thing that happens in the beginning. Just don't let the cravings "derail" you, it's very important to stabilize your dose as soon as possible! Maybe some "aversion therapy" might help you somewhat. For me its the gloomiest, grossest, most depressing "drug movies" you can find on Netflix :) Seriously. Nothing motivates you to just say NO more than some intense gross-out :) And don't think that IV heroin users have nothing in common with clean-cut, middle-class, golf-playing, lawn-mowing, shirt-pressing pill-popper population. More than half of them started with Vicodin and used to drive SUVs. The other half were just unfortunate to be born on the wrong side of the tracks... But heroin is almost never the drug of choice for those who live in the suburbs. It is, however, the drug of necessity a couple of years down the road. It's bleak, it's dirty, it's barely takes the edge off, but by then they just don't have a choice. You always start with a "happy" opiate, like morphine or Oxy. And only then, when you run out of doctors, money and pharmacies that haven't blacklisted you yet, you end up like that guy on Permanent Midnight. Or (G-d forgive me) Requiem for a dream (ugh... I think I just got an acute onset of carpal tunnel :))

Now, I know it's a bit childish, but hey - as long as it works.. for me a t least. With time, hopefully, you will be able to find new interests, hobbies, relationships, lots of things to occupy your mind with things we almost forgot we enjoy 9or don't enjoy, or hate, or stress about). Life will butt in, and eventually these warm fuzzy opiate glow will become somewhat of a memory. Like a relative you loved to hate, that died, and sometimes you wish he were alive just so you can tell him to his face how much you hated him. Or something like that.

Just don't give up. Although not instantly, Buprenorphine rewards those who respect it :)

Best of luck.

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