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PostPosted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:26 pm 
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Hi, I just want to say I truly respect how you responded to the Charlie comment. That (to me) shows you are a quality gal and I am in respect of your character. I can relate to your attitude on Charlie's comment too (realizing he is on your side, not over personalizing his words). Thank you as reading your reply was so encouraging for me and strangely uplifting.

BTW, you seem like a gal looking to God. May I just interject you had made a comment earlier "I just need to read more stories of people that have quit and say they like life better and believe them.." and then you added "is God real? I think he is. I like to know he is. But what if he wasn't? Will God ever reveal the purpsoe of life and death? "...

Honey, you must know this.."truth sets you free" but understand what Truth is? God is truth. Also, instead of endless "thinking" I have found that God answers prayer through obedience. Ever hear the term "act as if"? There is truth in that as long as the "as if" is based on truth - God's word. I believe you don't make something true by believing, it must be true first, then you believe. If you believe God is true, then ACT on His truth. I recommend you start at your question from earlier.."Is God real" and there is where you will find your first step to freedom - if you can one day say YES without any "I think" or "what if" then you are on your way to deeper truths to set you free (..those who draw near to me, I will REVEAL myself to them). Believe in me - you ACT on what you believe (it is not knowing). Intellectuals know the bible in and out but they don't believe. Something to consider.

Also, I recommend reading the Bible as some of your questions are answered straight away in the Bible (no gray area either). If you are truthful in your questions, then understand God may have already answered you or is answering you but He wants you to come to Him. Prayer, Bible Study, reading, church..all great ways to know God. Even if it takes awhile (it didnt all come together for me ) but over time..and the more I got sober, He did answer my prayer. I found for myself ,many of my lifelong "God" issues were all answered soon enough. I discovered most were answered after I realized I was asking the wrong questions. God bless.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:19 am 
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Karen, thank-you for that uplifting post. I like to surround myself with people like you to remind myself of Good People. Sometimes when I hang out with so many bad people, I almost start to forget about God. I read in this book I found from the 50's that the thought process behind what makes Christianity tick is that for people that have never been Christians, it is very hard for them to pick up the religion, because in order to feel God, one must believe in him first, in order to let go and feel him. It's kind of hard to explain, it's more than that, I just don't really know how to put it into words. But it is something I have found to be true. If I am stubborn and say "There is no possibility of heaven, therefore there is no God", it is too hard to feel God. But once I let go of that and believe, then I feel God, and your post has reminded me of that. I never thought about it, but you are right. I am asking the wrong questions. I'm not supposed to worry about what exactly happens when you are dead, or who I "am" inside, how my spirit works in the physical world... if God were going to tell us, he would have told us by now. Maybe it is a test of faith is why he won't tell us. Maybe it's not about knowing those things, anyways. A lot of Christian thought is very good life lessons even if you do or don't believe in an afterlife. That's God I'm talking about. Good energy, doing the right thing, and keeping good spirits. I find that if I have a negative attitude, shit starts to fall apart around me. But if I have hope and a positive attitude, my body starts to follow and making things happen. That's God. To me anyways. And just a small fraction, of course. There is a lot more to God than that. But I believe praying is in part finding your inner strength and doing what you need to do. Thank-you for the post, I am glad that you have got my mind back on track where it belongs.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 10:42 am 
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Im sorry you're going through this! I know how panic and anxiety feel and I am right there with ya! It always helps me to think of other people who are going through things with me! It sounds selfish I know! But when u think you're alone think of me! PM me! I am usually awake all night and definitely during the day! And I am not dosing from here on out so I am with ya!
Another thing that helps me:
Whenever I want to give up I always say "ill get high tmrw" then the next day comes and I say the same thing, and the day after..and so on. And "tomorrow" never comes ;)
Im here if ya need me! Thank you for your inspring words on my post also! Hang in there! I have been in your exact position w my now ex in jail (he wad in jail constantly!) And I usually was screwed whn he went in..had to live w my parents again and all that. Only diffrrence was that my parents knew I was an addict so sometimes they refused to even let me come home...and that's how I ended up homeless and alone...while detoxing. Sucked.
You CAN DO THIS! You will! Lets get this ish over with!!!!!


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 10:58 am 
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I just now got to read your latest update!!! My pesky phone was hiding the most recent one! But nevertheless my previous message still applies!!! You are doin GREAT! You can dooooooo this!
Brush ur shoulders off...you got this ;-)


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 10:36 pm 
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Location: Sitting at my computer
Hey IM, how about an update?

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 4:05 am 
invisiblemovement wrote:
I tapered down to .75 for a week, .5 for 3 days, then .3 for 2 days, and then on the last day did probably a total of 1 mg (oops). I'm guessing there was quite a bit of sub in my blood. It's day 3... and it's totally fine! I mean, besides the sneezing, terrible gas, goose bumps, hot/cold/hot/cold, decreased strength, and only a few hours of sleep at night. Ahhh that's nothing! I mean, I can walk... I can get on the computer... I can exercise. I've got some *bathroom issues* but I'm eating normal -- actually, way more than normal -- it's how I get back to sleep at night. But because of that -- Has it not hit me yet?? I hear that day 3 is usually as bad is it will get, and then maybe days 4-6 are like day 3, and then it gets better. Am I kidding myself? Is it going to slap me in the ass in a few days?

Well, all opinions are welcomed!


invisiblemovement,

I am soo sorry about this. Trust me, I totally know what ur going through. I thought Day 3 was bad.. unitil i got to day 4, then 5. i held it out tilll i couldnt take it anymore.. on day 6 i woke up and sprayed bugspray in my eyes. but that only made it worse. oh the agony. It was nothing but endless torture. You can do this!


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